REALITY ROUNDUP - 5/12/06
See, I told you I'd be back today. What an eventful 48 hours it's been, huh? And yeah, I was pretty dead on in my last column wasn't I? I was debating what our final would look like on "American Idol": Chris vs. Katharine or Chris vs. Taylor. Uhhhhh, woops. More on that in a second. I also asked if next season on "Survivor" they'll just start calling individual Immunity Challenges the "Terry Challenges" since he never loses. Then he promptly went out and lost. I think I'm just gonna go bury my head in the sand now.
AMERICAN IDOL
-To say that I'm shocked would be an understatement. I think most people are. But at this point in the competition, anyone can go home. Even if it is, top to bottom, the best singer in the competition. But in case you haven't heard, the band "Fuel" has already offered Chris its lead singer position and I'm guessing he's not going to pass that up. When he can start with them and when the first album comes out will have to be worked out due to his "American Idol" contract, but, I'm pretty sure Chris would much rather be touring the United States with "Fuel" then back home doing what he does. And I give he and his wife about one more year before they're done. Sorry. It's the harsh reality of rock-n-roll. No way he stays with her.
-Quick recap of "American Idol Extra" last night: Chris was pretty damn surprised he got voted off, the host is still a complete dipwad (Ty Treadway is his name by the way), Anthony Federov from last season is now learning Spanish because he wants to put out a Spanish album because he thinks he's Marc Anthony, the host might be a little light in the loafers, Chris is disappointed he won't get to do the hometown visit this week, Seacrest Out knew before the show started Chris was gone and didn't tell anyone, Ace Young's charity foundation raised a lot of money for trauma victims, and Ty Treadway is a massive tool. Yep. That was about it.
-Is it even worth speculating on who the final two would be? Please. I have no idea. All we know to this point is that Taylor has never been part of the final three or final two. Katharine has twice, and Elliot has three or four times. With that logic, Taylor should make the finals. Of course now that I said that, it'll probably be Katharine and Elliot singing at the Kodak Theatre in two weeks.
-Not that my opinion means anything since I've hit a bad streak here, but, I think we're looking at a Taylor/Katharine final. And as much as I'd like to see Katharine win, something tells me she won't. She's easily the most marketable one of the three, no doubt. Taylor has his niche of fans, and, well, I guess Elliot has his. But I think Katharine could put out a more wide ranging album than the other two. Doesn't mean she'll win though. Let's remember, no one whose lived west of Texas has ever won this thing. This show likes its winners from the midwest or south. Hell, I don't think anyone west of Texas has ever even made the final two. Let's see:
Kelly/Justin- Kelly was from Texas. Don't remember where Justin came from. Or who does his hair.
Reuben/Clay- Reuben was from Alabama. Clay from North Carolina.
Fantasia/Diana- Fantasia was from North Carolina. Diana was from Georgia.
Carrie/Bo- Carrie was from Oklahoma. Bo was from Alabama.
Yep. Fair to say this show is loved by the rednecks. They watch, they vote, and they produce the winners. And since Katharine seems to be disliked the most because she has a mom who's a vocal coach, she's from LA, and people don't like her bubbly personality and how she's constantly pushing her hair behind her ears, could we really be looking at an Elliot/Taylor final? Please God no. For all of us lonely, horny, young males that want to see Katharine rolling around on stage again, just make this happen one more time. Please? Ok. Fine. I'm not young. Only 19 more shopping days til' my 31st birthday. Yikes.
SURVIVOR: PANAMA
-Why did Danielle even think for a second that Terry would give up the Immunity Idol to her when he lost the Immunity Challenge? The minute he would've given that to her would've been the minute she runs and tells Aras and Cirie she's got it and to vote Terry off. But hey, I guess it didn't hurt trying. Nice try. And oh yeah, nice rack too. Don't know if I've mentioned that yet this season.
-Why did it take me all the way until last nights episode to see that Danielle has a tramp stamp? Granted, it's a real small one and not quite full-on white trash, but it's there. How did I not see this in previous episodes? Guess we didn't get too many shots of her from behind. Gee, can't imagine why. Probably had nothing to do with the camera focusing on her chest, did it? And it's not like we didn't know hers were fake, but I think two weeks ago during the challenge where they were standing on the wooden beam in the water, in plain view of the whole camera, you could see the ripple in the skin that proved they were fake. And it was a good three or five seconds. No, I didn't pause the TiVo. I just went super slo-mo.
-You know tempers were short out there if Terry's getting on Cirie's case for dropping her torch in the wrong place. Geez. What was that all about? Was Terry PMS'ing? That seemed a little harsh. Then Aras starts throwing out "Terry's a woman basher" comments out of left field. What's going on here? Although it was funny to hear Aras say, "Call the Whambulance. Terry's crying." Good one Aras. However, the Yoga gods probably didn't find your maturity level up to their expectations. That might cost you. And enough with the Ace Ventura hair. Can you possibly do something else with it?
-Finale on Sunday. Always exciting. "Survivor" produces some of the better reality show finales. I believe they're gonna do Sunday's from New York, not Hollywood. So I'm sure Probst will be riding in on some jet ski with the votes in hand. Here's what I've always wondered about the Survivor finale: I'm sure most of these people email and keep in touch from the time filming ends to the time the finale airs. What's to stop the two finalists from contacting each member of the jury and asking, "Hey, did you vote for me?" How would CBS be able to prove that? And since the Survivor winner has been revealed three times through offshore gambling sites before the finale aired, well, seems to me that the contestants know who wins before the finale airs and they're just acting surprised. I know that a lot of money came in on Sandra from "Pearl Islands" and money came in on Jenna from "Amazon" to where they had to stop all wagering. And Amber from "All-Stars". So basically when Probst says no one will see the votes until the finals, he's not taking into account these people just asking the others who they voted for.
UNAN1MOUS
-Did anyone watch this? I did. For all eight weeks. Kind of interesting. Kind of hokey. I loved the fact that the old host from "Double Dare" on Nickelodeon, JD Roth, was the host of the show. He's made himself out to be a little cooler since those days. Roth also created "For Love or Money", the "Biggest Loser", and I know a couple more. Who'd have ever thunk it? "Double Dare" was a great show. I liked the ending where they had to jump in a pool of chocolate to find a flag. Or in the giant peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I'm addicted to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. ADDICTED. Has to be grape jelly though. Strawberry? Blech. Smuckers grape jelly with Skippy creamy peanut butter. Ok, so I gave a "Reality Steve Fact" out early. Now I'm hungry. I'm gonna go make a sandwich even though its 12:30 in the morning.
-I'm back. Where was I? Oh, yeah. The show. It actually got to be a little ridiculous in the middle when they kept making people ineligible to win the money. I guess I can kinda understand why since if they made all of the seven remaining eligible, nobody would've won. They never would've come to a unanimous decision. And if you're gonna have a show carry on for eight weeks with a pot dwindling down every week by the second, and then NO ONE ends up winning? Forget trying to do this show again. No one would watch. Gotta have a payoff. Didn't think it'd be Tarah though. That was a surprise. Guess now she can make even more expensive handbags with an extra 400k in her pocket.
8th & Ocean
-At the beginning of this show, I set the Season Pass on my TiVo. Tonight when I went to my list of shows, it said I had 10 episodes of "8th & Ocean" saved. I hadn't watched any of them. Then I just deleted all of them. Oh well. I tried. Sort of. Maybe I'll go buy the DVD when it comes out. I really did want to start to watch it. But apparently not that much since they sat in there for over two months and I never watched five seconds. Oh well. We've got LC's "The Hills" starting very soon, plus "Laguna Beach" is back any minute. Oh boy. You have no idea how that's going to get me through my summer. Plus, we've got another RW/RR Challenge coming up. However, don't know if I mentioned this, but in my interview a while back with Katie Doyle, I found out that the next Challenge is going to be RW/RR'ers vs. the public. So I guess it's just the rejects who sent in their tapes to be on those shows and never got on. Well, now they get their chance. Filmings done already and I know Katie is in it again. Haven't heard from her in a while. Nor do I expect to. Her and Derrick moved to Chicago I believe. That'll be my MTV fix for the summer however.
-Email of the Week: This comes from family. My aunt in New York. Basically wanted me to share with the world how "not" East Coast I am. Word for word. Exactly how she wrote it.
TO ANSWER ALL YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT MY NOT ITALIAN NEPHEW.....
MAAAAAADDDDDDDDD AWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN..........HE IS SOOOOOOOO
NOT ITALIAN......HE CAME OVER MY HOUSE TO EAT DINNER.....DIDNT KNOW WHAT PROSCIUTTO IS..FRESH MARINATED MOZZ...BALLS....SOPPASATTA.......ETC
HE WENT FOR BREAKFAST AND ASKED FOR SOUGHDOUGH BREAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I SAY NO MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BUT I STILL LOVE HIM AND WOULD NOT CHANGE HIM FOR THE WORLD......
HE CAN COME TO N.Y ANYTIME
KEEP UP YOUR GREAT WRITING
LOVE,
AUNTIE FROM NEW YORK
Yeah. My thoughts exactly. What's Soppasatta? Still don't know what Prosciutto is. I know I ate it at the party. I just don't remember what it is. And yes, I asked for Sourdough bread with my scrambled eggs. Forgot what coast I was on. So if anyone else wants to question the Italian in me, has any high school photos of Katharine McPhee, or just wants to know what's going on in my life, email me at steve@realitysteve.com and maybe your email will appear in the next "Reality Roundup".
-"Reality Steve Fact": Three things currently on my desk right now: the latest edition of "US Weekly", the book "He's Just Not That Into You", and a box of Do-si-do Girl Scout cookies.
Reality Television Show Links
AMERICAN IDOL
-To say that I'm shocked would be an understatement. I think most people are. But at this point in the competition, anyone can go home. Even if it is, top to bottom, the best singer in the competition. But in case you haven't heard, the band "Fuel" has already offered Chris its lead singer position and I'm guessing he's not going to pass that up. When he can start with them and when the first album comes out will have to be worked out due to his "American Idol" contract, but, I'm pretty sure Chris would much rather be touring the United States with "Fuel" then back home doing what he does. And I give he and his wife about one more year before they're done. Sorry. It's the harsh reality of rock-n-roll. No way he stays with her.
-Quick recap of "American Idol Extra" last night: Chris was pretty damn surprised he got voted off, the host is still a complete dipwad (Ty Treadway is his name by the way), Anthony Federov from last season is now learning Spanish because he wants to put out a Spanish album because he thinks he's Marc Anthony, the host might be a little light in the loafers, Chris is disappointed he won't get to do the hometown visit this week, Seacrest Out knew before the show started Chris was gone and didn't tell anyone, Ace Young's charity foundation raised a lot of money for trauma victims, and Ty Treadway is a massive tool. Yep. That was about it.
-Is it even worth speculating on who the final two would be? Please. I have no idea. All we know to this point is that Taylor has never been part of the final three or final two. Katharine has twice, and Elliot has three or four times. With that logic, Taylor should make the finals. Of course now that I said that, it'll probably be Katharine and Elliot singing at the Kodak Theatre in two weeks.
-Not that my opinion means anything since I've hit a bad streak here, but, I think we're looking at a Taylor/Katharine final. And as much as I'd like to see Katharine win, something tells me she won't. She's easily the most marketable one of the three, no doubt. Taylor has his niche of fans, and, well, I guess Elliot has his. But I think Katharine could put out a more wide ranging album than the other two. Doesn't mean she'll win though. Let's remember, no one whose lived west of Texas has ever won this thing. This show likes its winners from the midwest or south. Hell, I don't think anyone west of Texas has ever even made the final two. Let's see:
Kelly/Justin- Kelly was from Texas. Don't remember where Justin came from. Or who does his hair.
Reuben/Clay- Reuben was from Alabama. Clay from North Carolina.
Fantasia/Diana- Fantasia was from North Carolina. Diana was from Georgia.
Carrie/Bo- Carrie was from Oklahoma. Bo was from Alabama.
Yep. Fair to say this show is loved by the rednecks. They watch, they vote, and they produce the winners. And since Katharine seems to be disliked the most because she has a mom who's a vocal coach, she's from LA, and people don't like her bubbly personality and how she's constantly pushing her hair behind her ears, could we really be looking at an Elliot/Taylor final? Please God no. For all of us lonely, horny, young males that want to see Katharine rolling around on stage again, just make this happen one more time. Please? Ok. Fine. I'm not young. Only 19 more shopping days til' my 31st birthday. Yikes.
SURVIVOR: PANAMA
-Why did Danielle even think for a second that Terry would give up the Immunity Idol to her when he lost the Immunity Challenge? The minute he would've given that to her would've been the minute she runs and tells Aras and Cirie she's got it and to vote Terry off. But hey, I guess it didn't hurt trying. Nice try. And oh yeah, nice rack too. Don't know if I've mentioned that yet this season.
-Why did it take me all the way until last nights episode to see that Danielle has a tramp stamp? Granted, it's a real small one and not quite full-on white trash, but it's there. How did I not see this in previous episodes? Guess we didn't get too many shots of her from behind. Gee, can't imagine why. Probably had nothing to do with the camera focusing on her chest, did it? And it's not like we didn't know hers were fake, but I think two weeks ago during the challenge where they were standing on the wooden beam in the water, in plain view of the whole camera, you could see the ripple in the skin that proved they were fake. And it was a good three or five seconds. No, I didn't pause the TiVo. I just went super slo-mo.
-You know tempers were short out there if Terry's getting on Cirie's case for dropping her torch in the wrong place. Geez. What was that all about? Was Terry PMS'ing? That seemed a little harsh. Then Aras starts throwing out "Terry's a woman basher" comments out of left field. What's going on here? Although it was funny to hear Aras say, "Call the Whambulance. Terry's crying." Good one Aras. However, the Yoga gods probably didn't find your maturity level up to their expectations. That might cost you. And enough with the Ace Ventura hair. Can you possibly do something else with it?
-Finale on Sunday. Always exciting. "Survivor" produces some of the better reality show finales. I believe they're gonna do Sunday's from New York, not Hollywood. So I'm sure Probst will be riding in on some jet ski with the votes in hand. Here's what I've always wondered about the Survivor finale: I'm sure most of these people email and keep in touch from the time filming ends to the time the finale airs. What's to stop the two finalists from contacting each member of the jury and asking, "Hey, did you vote for me?" How would CBS be able to prove that? And since the Survivor winner has been revealed three times through offshore gambling sites before the finale aired, well, seems to me that the contestants know who wins before the finale airs and they're just acting surprised. I know that a lot of money came in on Sandra from "Pearl Islands" and money came in on Jenna from "Amazon" to where they had to stop all wagering. And Amber from "All-Stars". So basically when Probst says no one will see the votes until the finals, he's not taking into account these people just asking the others who they voted for.
UNAN1MOUS
-Did anyone watch this? I did. For all eight weeks. Kind of interesting. Kind of hokey. I loved the fact that the old host from "Double Dare" on Nickelodeon, JD Roth, was the host of the show. He's made himself out to be a little cooler since those days. Roth also created "For Love or Money", the "Biggest Loser", and I know a couple more. Who'd have ever thunk it? "Double Dare" was a great show. I liked the ending where they had to jump in a pool of chocolate to find a flag. Or in the giant peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I'm addicted to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. ADDICTED. Has to be grape jelly though. Strawberry? Blech. Smuckers grape jelly with Skippy creamy peanut butter. Ok, so I gave a "Reality Steve Fact" out early. Now I'm hungry. I'm gonna go make a sandwich even though its 12:30 in the morning.
-I'm back. Where was I? Oh, yeah. The show. It actually got to be a little ridiculous in the middle when they kept making people ineligible to win the money. I guess I can kinda understand why since if they made all of the seven remaining eligible, nobody would've won. They never would've come to a unanimous decision. And if you're gonna have a show carry on for eight weeks with a pot dwindling down every week by the second, and then NO ONE ends up winning? Forget trying to do this show again. No one would watch. Gotta have a payoff. Didn't think it'd be Tarah though. That was a surprise. Guess now she can make even more expensive handbags with an extra 400k in her pocket.
8th & Ocean
-At the beginning of this show, I set the Season Pass on my TiVo. Tonight when I went to my list of shows, it said I had 10 episodes of "8th & Ocean" saved. I hadn't watched any of them. Then I just deleted all of them. Oh well. I tried. Sort of. Maybe I'll go buy the DVD when it comes out. I really did want to start to watch it. But apparently not that much since they sat in there for over two months and I never watched five seconds. Oh well. We've got LC's "The Hills" starting very soon, plus "Laguna Beach" is back any minute. Oh boy. You have no idea how that's going to get me through my summer. Plus, we've got another RW/RR Challenge coming up. However, don't know if I mentioned this, but in my interview a while back with Katie Doyle, I found out that the next Challenge is going to be RW/RR'ers vs. the public. So I guess it's just the rejects who sent in their tapes to be on those shows and never got on. Well, now they get their chance. Filmings done already and I know Katie is in it again. Haven't heard from her in a while. Nor do I expect to. Her and Derrick moved to Chicago I believe. That'll be my MTV fix for the summer however.
-Email of the Week: This comes from family. My aunt in New York. Basically wanted me to share with the world how "not" East Coast I am. Word for word. Exactly how she wrote it.
TO ANSWER ALL YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT MY NOT ITALIAN NEPHEW.....
MAAAAAADDDDDDDDD AWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN..........HE IS SOOOOOOOO
NOT ITALIAN......HE CAME OVER MY HOUSE TO EAT DINNER.....DIDNT KNOW WHAT PROSCIUTTO IS..FRESH MARINATED MOZZ...BALLS....SOPPASATTA.......ETC
HE WENT FOR BREAKFAST AND ASKED FOR SOUGHDOUGH BREAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I SAY NO MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BUT I STILL LOVE HIM AND WOULD NOT CHANGE HIM FOR THE WORLD......
HE CAN COME TO N.Y ANYTIME
KEEP UP YOUR GREAT WRITING
LOVE,
AUNTIE FROM NEW YORK
Yeah. My thoughts exactly. What's Soppasatta? Still don't know what Prosciutto is. I know I ate it at the party. I just don't remember what it is. And yes, I asked for Sourdough bread with my scrambled eggs. Forgot what coast I was on. So if anyone else wants to question the Italian in me, has any high school photos of Katharine McPhee, or just wants to know what's going on in my life, email me at steve@realitysteve.com and maybe your email will appear in the next "Reality Roundup".
-"Reality Steve Fact": Three things currently on my desk right now: the latest edition of "US Weekly", the book "He's Just Not That Into You", and a box of Do-si-do Girl Scout cookies.Reality Television Show Links
posted by reality steve at 11:46 PM
9 Comments:
Danielle has the worst boob job ever. The canyon between them is a mile wide.
"Three things currently on my desk right now: the latest edition of "US Weekly", the book "He's Just Not That Into You", and a box of Do-si-do Girl Scout cookies."
You really are gay. Just stop trying to fight it and remember, Vito is happy. Oh wait. You're not a real Italian, you don't watch The Sopranos. Not chick-ish enough for you.
LOL I love your Auntie! Maaaadddd AWwwwwnnnn!
I too am into pb & j--but what's with Skippy creamy? It's got to be Adams Old Fashioned Crunchy..it's kinda sad, I really expected you to be a natural p-nut butter kind of guy. But I"ll try to get over it.
Just to clear one thing up, Steve. Rednecks are EVERYWHERE.
Finale prediction: Katharine and Taylor (fingers-crossed).
DAMN ARAS and his constantly spiked hair and popped collar. Damn him to hell.
Thanks for calling them Do-si-do's instead of peanut butter something or others. I hate that they changed the names of the best cookies. Hello, caramel delights? They're called Samoas.
Oh, and I'm a girl, and I think Katherine is awesome.
Correction- JD Roth hosted "Fun House" on Nickelodeon. "You are...going to the fun house". Mark Sommers hosted Double Dare (he now hosts the "history of food" show on food Net). OMG...I watch WAY too much TV.
PS. Steve, do you watch OC? Have you noticed that it is 90210's script, just with better style? eg. Marissa Cooper dying in a fiery auto crash...sound familiar-Dylan and his Noxema girl wife?
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