REALITY ROUNDUP PODCAST #4
Yes, it's finally here. Although, I leave on a business trip to New York tomorrow, so, there will be no column until I get back. Frankly, I didn't have enough time. "You can sleep on the plane, Reality Steve." Uhhhh, no I can't. Not with those 5" inch pillows they give you. You can download podcast #4 right here. Or you can just click on the title. And remember, if you are a member of iTunes, just click on the subscribe link down the right hand column, and the podcast will appear in your iTunes after I post it. All you have to do is refresh your library. Trust me. It'll be in there. It is on mine. I listen to myself quite frequently. Kidding. I can't stand listening to myself, like most people. Anyway, this week's podcast covers the latest celebrity news, my trip to the gym last night, "The Hills" finale, "America's Got Talent", "Last Comic Standing", and "Real World: Key West". Along with a couple tidbits about "Rockstar: Supernova", and "RW/RR Challenge: Fresh Meat". Enjoy....
AMERICA’S GOT TALENT
-This is David Hasselhoff’s world recently, we’re just living it. Two weeks ago, he’s wearing a “Don’t Hassle the Hoff” shirt on television. Wow. That takes balls, I tell ya’. Don’t worry Hoff, we won’t. You seem to be doing a hell of a job yourself hassling other people. First there are reports that the wrist brace he’s wearing was actually from being drunk and smashing it through glass while stumbling all over himself. But then he comes out and says he just fell off a ladder or something ridiculous. Sure you did Hoff. Then we hear about how he wasn’t allowed to board a flight because he was being belligerent. Witnesses say he was drunk, but he says it was a reaction he had to his medication. One of my favorites. Anytime someone gives the ol’ “reaction to the medication” line, that’s basically and admission of, “the red bull and vodka chaser after I took my pills apparently didn’t mix well.”
-So whatever you do, “Don’t Hassle the Hoff”. We know your ex-wife won‘t anymore, that’s for sure. I guess he officially got divorced last week from his wife of 15 years. Now, I’m not a betting man, but something tells me it probably had to do with the fact he’s been boozing it up all over the news, and he also might’ve shacked up with one of those backup singers from “America’s Got Talent.”
-You saw the show. You saw the Hoff sing. They made such a big deal the night before about him singing, which was so pre-planned it wasn’t funny. Yet, he gets up there and he’s totally lip synching. That was embarrassing. Ashlee Simpson thought his performance was awful. In fact, you’re embarrassing Hoffy. The Hoff should be thanking Simon Cowell til’ the day he dies that he kept his name out there by making him a judge. And yes, “America’s Got Talent” has been picked up for a 2nd season.
THE HILLS
-I understand “Laguna Beach” is starting up this week, but I had no idea the “Hills” was done so soon. I figured it’d at least go til September. Boy was I wrong. And pissed. Although it has been picked up for a 2nd season and begins filming shortly. Yippeeee….more LC and Jason. Can’t wait. I honestly think that Season 2 of “The Hills” should just be a recap of every guy that Heidi has hooked up with since dumping Jordan and exactly how many diseases she picked up while doing it. That would be fascinating television. It really would. If Heidi doesn’t have a full blown STD by the end of summer, I’d be shocked.
-Heidi is the breakout star of the summer, no question. So the woman who had never had longer than a six month relationship decides to dump Jordan after eight months. Why? Well, because in her mind, “There’s a difference between loving someone, and being totally in love with them.” Can we honestly be surprised Heidi used that as her dumping excuse? I mean, really. Can we? Especially after watching her in the finale tell Audrina, “I just want to go out every night this summer and meet tons of guys. I’m so over Jordan.” And what’d she say, “Dating is like pre-school? I love you, I love you, I love you”….and that’s what she wants to go back to doing? Ummm, I’ve dated before. Last time I checked, it was more similar to Russian Roulette than pre-school. But since Heidi is only about six years removed from pre-school, I can see where she might make the correlation.
-Heidi did give us one last doozy before she left us this season. She uttered this beauty before dumping Jordan on his ass, which led to one of the most awkward male crying meltdowns I think we’ve ever witnessed. “I just want someone who loves me sooooo much. Every girl deserves to be treated like a princess.” Amazing. Yeah, that’s pretty much Heidi for you. Hey, he bought you a little runt of a dog, didn’t he? That wasn’t good enough? Oh yeah, and Heidi, if you know you’re inviting Jordan over to kick him to the curb, I mean, could ya’ tell LC to maybe go shopping or something? Does she really need to be sitting out in the front room why you and Jordan are sobbing hysterically in your room? Was that necessary? I found that quite odd. Then again, this whole show is odd.
-Although Heidi and Jordan were together a whopping eight months, I never really saw them as the most close-knit couple ever. Did you? We barely knew anything about them together. Well, besides the fact in the beginning of the series, when they met for lunch one day and were talking about their sex from the night before. Woops. Forgot about that. But anyway, watching Jordan absolutely lose himself when she dumped him was almost unbearable. Will this guy ever be taken seriously by another dude the rest of his life? Please. Not a chance. That guy will never live that down as long as he lives. If Jordan someday climbs Mount Everest backwards, he’ll still be remembered as the pansy who cried hysterically when his eight month relationship went in the toilet on national television. I say just end it all right now, Jordan. Save yourself the humiliation for the next 50 years.
-As for the LC/Jason/Paris storyline…will she take the summer internship or stay with Jason in Malibu? I had a lot of questions regarding this whole thing. If you didn’t see her staying with Jason coming, you haven’t been paying attention. Ummmm…hello? We’ve seen her in all the magazines this summer so she obviously wasn’t gone. Even in that scene where she’s saying goodbye to Heidi, and leaving the apartment, and driving the car, then they’d flash to a picture of her boss waiting at the airport, I knew she was going to Malibu. That wasn’t hard to figure out. However, here are my questions…
-If LC is serious about a fashion career, exactly what explanation did she give for turning down a Paris internship so she could stay with her boyfriend? I’d rather hang out with my moocher boyfriend who’s already cheated on me, drinks like a fish, and with whom I argue all the time than go to Paris on the company dime for a summer. I would’ve fired her on the spot.
-As for Jason, like I’ve asked 1000 times before, what does this guy do? And how in the blue hell did he get the money to rent that Malibu beach house? I’m guessing that thing easily goes for about $4000-5000/mo. Without a doubt. Even if his family’s loaded, that’s a hefty rent to pay for the summer. And it didn’t really seem like he was asking LC to help foot the bill. Maybe because his job entails meeting people in parks late at night to exchange bags of hash is why we don’t see what he does.
-Back to LC, if she just gave her internship up to Whitney, how could she possibly go back and work at Teen Vogue? Why would they want her back? Besides the free exposure on MTV? I’m sure next season will be a whole new job, a more diverse group of friends, and hopefully, more sex. I’m kidding. I think.
-So this past summer, 19 year old LC had no job, no school, and was living in Malibu in a five grand a month house. So how does she make money? I know, I know…..her family is loaded but still…you have to work don’t you? So how does she justify turning down that internship? I’ve read an interview where LC has said she does not want to be an actress like Kristin Cavallari and actually wants to be in the fashion industry. So how did she not take that?
-I understand they had to build the suspense of “Will she stay or will she go?”, but since we all knew she was staying, I really have to find out exactly what the reason she gave Lisa Love was for not going to Paris. I’m making it my summer mission. And if Teen Vogue takes her back, that’s a joke. You will see me picketing in front of their offices next season if she’s hired back.
RW/RR CHALLENGE
-So wait a second. Coral had a slipped kneecap and Evan had a hernia and were sent home, but they were pissed because they wanted to compete? I’ve never had either one, but I’m guessing those might sting a bit. Call me crazy. I can’t believe they wanted to compete that bad. Please. Like they can’t scrounge up 125 grand from doing all their appearances and getting all the free crap they get from the show. Please. It wasn’t that important to win.
-Sorry to see our good friend, and loyal Reality Steve reader, Katie Doyle get sent home. Ok, so Katie doesn’t read the site. She just agreed to do the interview (which you can read in the “Archived Columns” section). I must say though, hanging out with Katie for three hours at a café in Beverly Hills was about as entertaining a time I’ve had in a while. She’s legitimately crazy. Hell, she admits it herself. Read the interview. But it’s also crazy in a funny way.
REAL WORLD
-Janelle and Kasib had a wonderful relationship, didn‘t they? You know what I’d like to see once on this show? Some cast member have a boy/girlfriend from back home come visit, everything go wonderfully, and those two live happily ever after. No emotional issues. No drama. Just two people that genuinely liked each other. Is that asking too much? Has that ever happened on this show? Ever? What’s wrong with having normal relationships that don’t involve one of the following things:
a) physical abuse
b) verbal abuse
c) emotional abuse
d) all of the above
You know what? I stand corrected. This is the 16th season of this show. During the Austin season, that pale chick and her boyfriend in the wheelchair had a normal relationship. Well, normal in that they actually liked each other, didn’t cheat, and didn’t fight. So I guess that’s one in 16 seasons. I think we need to stand and applaud. I mean, I understand they cast emotional basket cases for this show because it adds to the drama, but once in a while I’d like to see just a nice, normal relationship that I can just sit back and enjoy.
-Janelle is a cold hearted beyotch. Not only did this woman kick her ex out of the house who came to visit her, but, wouldn’t even let him back in and made him sleep at the airport when he couldn’t book a hotel room. I’ll even side with Janelle on the point where she was upset because he was asking other girls to come back to the house without the roommates permission. She had a right to be mad about that because that’s probably against the producers rules. You can even argue she had a right to kick him out. But once every hotel was booked and he had nowhere to stay, and he called to say he was coming back, you mean to tell me she couldn’t let him back into the house to sleep on the couch or something? That was cold. Cold and brutal. I would never speak to her again if I was Kasib. But he will. And they’re probably back together already.
ROCKSTAR: SUPERNOVA
-Like I predicted, Tommy Lee is hitting on Storm Large. I don’t watch the show, but every time I come across it, she’s just performed and he’s flirting with her. I did hear her say to him, “Six letters Tommy: G-o-o-g-l-e.” That spells “Google”. And of course I did. This chick is weird. Weird and freaky. Which couldn’t be any more perfect for our boy Tommy Lee. I guarantee he’s already hit that and still is on a consistent basis. I can also guarantee she won’t win that contest for the sole fact that it’ll come across as rigged if she did. Then again, I have no idea who can sing on that show since I don’t watch. Maybe she will win. What’s the prize besides being the lead singer of that band. Contracting hepatitis C?
CELEBRITY NEWS
-Lance Bass is gay. This kind of upset me. Not the fact that he came out, but the fact that this was like the lead story in every magazine, and on every newscast. I was shocked. You know what’s news? If Lance Bass announced he was having a hot, steamy, strictly sexual relationship with Jessica Alba. That would’ve been news. He’s gay? Uhhhh, ok. This is the same guy that used to wear rhinestone jackets on stage, highlights his hair, and sang songs titled “Bye, Bye, Bye”. Tell me something I don’t know. Like Joey Fatone is skinny.
-And how about not only announcing he’s gay, but that his boyfriend is Reichen from the Amazing Race. Well, I don’t watch the Amazing Race. I just know Reichen from his Oscar winning performance in “The Scorned” with all the other reality stars. Lance Bass and Reichen Lemkuhl are in a relationship. Makes my heart skip a few beats, I tell ya’. Nice picture on the cover of “People”. Honestly, do you think they could’ve found a more feminine picture than that? And in big yellow letters, “I’M GAY”. Why not just have him do the jazz hands look while you’re at it. Unbelievable.
-Pamela Anderson married Kid Rock last week. And will marry him again in three more cities because, well, I guess they feel the need to christen every city she’s never had sex in. With him. I thought I read something the other day where it is now illegal to marry white trash in more than one city? Anyone else see that story? Just stay off the party boats in Havasu you two, and leave the video cameras at home. Kid, or Mr. Rock, has already gotten in trouble with Scott Stapp from Creed for their homemade videos with girls, he doesn’t need another one. There is actually a betting website out there right now that has odds on how long before Kid Rock is caught cheating on Pam. The date they gave was Oct. 1st of 2007. That’s the easiest bet you’ll ever make. If Tommy Lee swung his hammer around town when he was married to Pam, what makes us think Kid won’t?
Reality Television Show Links
AMERICA’S GOT TALENT
-This is David Hasselhoff’s world recently, we’re just living it. Two weeks ago, he’s wearing a “Don’t Hassle the Hoff” shirt on television. Wow. That takes balls, I tell ya’. Don’t worry Hoff, we won’t. You seem to be doing a hell of a job yourself hassling other people. First there are reports that the wrist brace he’s wearing was actually from being drunk and smashing it through glass while stumbling all over himself. But then he comes out and says he just fell off a ladder or something ridiculous. Sure you did Hoff. Then we hear about how he wasn’t allowed to board a flight because he was being belligerent. Witnesses say he was drunk, but he says it was a reaction he had to his medication. One of my favorites. Anytime someone gives the ol’ “reaction to the medication” line, that’s basically and admission of, “the red bull and vodka chaser after I took my pills apparently didn’t mix well.”
-So whatever you do, “Don’t Hassle the Hoff”. We know your ex-wife won‘t anymore, that’s for sure. I guess he officially got divorced last week from his wife of 15 years. Now, I’m not a betting man, but something tells me it probably had to do with the fact he’s been boozing it up all over the news, and he also might’ve shacked up with one of those backup singers from “America’s Got Talent.”
-You saw the show. You saw the Hoff sing. They made such a big deal the night before about him singing, which was so pre-planned it wasn’t funny. Yet, he gets up there and he’s totally lip synching. That was embarrassing. Ashlee Simpson thought his performance was awful. In fact, you’re embarrassing Hoffy. The Hoff should be thanking Simon Cowell til’ the day he dies that he kept his name out there by making him a judge. And yes, “America’s Got Talent” has been picked up for a 2nd season.
THE HILLS
-I understand “Laguna Beach” is starting up this week, but I had no idea the “Hills” was done so soon. I figured it’d at least go til September. Boy was I wrong. And pissed. Although it has been picked up for a 2nd season and begins filming shortly. Yippeeee….more LC and Jason. Can’t wait. I honestly think that Season 2 of “The Hills” should just be a recap of every guy that Heidi has hooked up with since dumping Jordan and exactly how many diseases she picked up while doing it. That would be fascinating television. It really would. If Heidi doesn’t have a full blown STD by the end of summer, I’d be shocked.
-Heidi is the breakout star of the summer, no question. So the woman who had never had longer than a six month relationship decides to dump Jordan after eight months. Why? Well, because in her mind, “There’s a difference between loving someone, and being totally in love with them.” Can we honestly be surprised Heidi used that as her dumping excuse? I mean, really. Can we? Especially after watching her in the finale tell Audrina, “I just want to go out every night this summer and meet tons of guys. I’m so over Jordan.” And what’d she say, “Dating is like pre-school? I love you, I love you, I love you”….and that’s what she wants to go back to doing? Ummm, I’ve dated before. Last time I checked, it was more similar to Russian Roulette than pre-school. But since Heidi is only about six years removed from pre-school, I can see where she might make the correlation.
-Heidi did give us one last doozy before she left us this season. She uttered this beauty before dumping Jordan on his ass, which led to one of the most awkward male crying meltdowns I think we’ve ever witnessed. “I just want someone who loves me sooooo much. Every girl deserves to be treated like a princess.” Amazing. Yeah, that’s pretty much Heidi for you. Hey, he bought you a little runt of a dog, didn’t he? That wasn’t good enough? Oh yeah, and Heidi, if you know you’re inviting Jordan over to kick him to the curb, I mean, could ya’ tell LC to maybe go shopping or something? Does she really need to be sitting out in the front room why you and Jordan are sobbing hysterically in your room? Was that necessary? I found that quite odd. Then again, this whole show is odd.
-Although Heidi and Jordan were together a whopping eight months, I never really saw them as the most close-knit couple ever. Did you? We barely knew anything about them together. Well, besides the fact in the beginning of the series, when they met for lunch one day and were talking about their sex from the night before. Woops. Forgot about that. But anyway, watching Jordan absolutely lose himself when she dumped him was almost unbearable. Will this guy ever be taken seriously by another dude the rest of his life? Please. Not a chance. That guy will never live that down as long as he lives. If Jordan someday climbs Mount Everest backwards, he’ll still be remembered as the pansy who cried hysterically when his eight month relationship went in the toilet on national television. I say just end it all right now, Jordan. Save yourself the humiliation for the next 50 years.
-As for the LC/Jason/Paris storyline…will she take the summer internship or stay with Jason in Malibu? I had a lot of questions regarding this whole thing. If you didn’t see her staying with Jason coming, you haven’t been paying attention. Ummmm…hello? We’ve seen her in all the magazines this summer so she obviously wasn’t gone. Even in that scene where she’s saying goodbye to Heidi, and leaving the apartment, and driving the car, then they’d flash to a picture of her boss waiting at the airport, I knew she was going to Malibu. That wasn’t hard to figure out. However, here are my questions…
-If LC is serious about a fashion career, exactly what explanation did she give for turning down a Paris internship so she could stay with her boyfriend? I’d rather hang out with my moocher boyfriend who’s already cheated on me, drinks like a fish, and with whom I argue all the time than go to Paris on the company dime for a summer. I would’ve fired her on the spot.
-As for Jason, like I’ve asked 1000 times before, what does this guy do? And how in the blue hell did he get the money to rent that Malibu beach house? I’m guessing that thing easily goes for about $4000-5000/mo. Without a doubt. Even if his family’s loaded, that’s a hefty rent to pay for the summer. And it didn’t really seem like he was asking LC to help foot the bill. Maybe because his job entails meeting people in parks late at night to exchange bags of hash is why we don’t see what he does.
-Back to LC, if she just gave her internship up to Whitney, how could she possibly go back and work at Teen Vogue? Why would they want her back? Besides the free exposure on MTV? I’m sure next season will be a whole new job, a more diverse group of friends, and hopefully, more sex. I’m kidding. I think.
-So this past summer, 19 year old LC had no job, no school, and was living in Malibu in a five grand a month house. So how does she make money? I know, I know…..her family is loaded but still…you have to work don’t you? So how does she justify turning down that internship? I’ve read an interview where LC has said she does not want to be an actress like Kristin Cavallari and actually wants to be in the fashion industry. So how did she not take that?
-I understand they had to build the suspense of “Will she stay or will she go?”, but since we all knew she was staying, I really have to find out exactly what the reason she gave Lisa Love was for not going to Paris. I’m making it my summer mission. And if Teen Vogue takes her back, that’s a joke. You will see me picketing in front of their offices next season if she’s hired back.
RW/RR CHALLENGE
-So wait a second. Coral had a slipped kneecap and Evan had a hernia and were sent home, but they were pissed because they wanted to compete? I’ve never had either one, but I’m guessing those might sting a bit. Call me crazy. I can’t believe they wanted to compete that bad. Please. Like they can’t scrounge up 125 grand from doing all their appearances and getting all the free crap they get from the show. Please. It wasn’t that important to win.
-Sorry to see our good friend, and loyal Reality Steve reader, Katie Doyle get sent home. Ok, so Katie doesn’t read the site. She just agreed to do the interview (which you can read in the “Archived Columns” section). I must say though, hanging out with Katie for three hours at a café in Beverly Hills was about as entertaining a time I’ve had in a while. She’s legitimately crazy. Hell, she admits it herself. Read the interview. But it’s also crazy in a funny way.
REAL WORLD
-Janelle and Kasib had a wonderful relationship, didn‘t they? You know what I’d like to see once on this show? Some cast member have a boy/girlfriend from back home come visit, everything go wonderfully, and those two live happily ever after. No emotional issues. No drama. Just two people that genuinely liked each other. Is that asking too much? Has that ever happened on this show? Ever? What’s wrong with having normal relationships that don’t involve one of the following things:
a) physical abuse
b) verbal abuse
c) emotional abuse
d) all of the above
You know what? I stand corrected. This is the 16th season of this show. During the Austin season, that pale chick and her boyfriend in the wheelchair had a normal relationship. Well, normal in that they actually liked each other, didn’t cheat, and didn’t fight. So I guess that’s one in 16 seasons. I think we need to stand and applaud. I mean, I understand they cast emotional basket cases for this show because it adds to the drama, but once in a while I’d like to see just a nice, normal relationship that I can just sit back and enjoy.
-Janelle is a cold hearted beyotch. Not only did this woman kick her ex out of the house who came to visit her, but, wouldn’t even let him back in and made him sleep at the airport when he couldn’t book a hotel room. I’ll even side with Janelle on the point where she was upset because he was asking other girls to come back to the house without the roommates permission. She had a right to be mad about that because that’s probably against the producers rules. You can even argue she had a right to kick him out. But once every hotel was booked and he had nowhere to stay, and he called to say he was coming back, you mean to tell me she couldn’t let him back into the house to sleep on the couch or something? That was cold. Cold and brutal. I would never speak to her again if I was Kasib. But he will. And they’re probably back together already.
ROCKSTAR: SUPERNOVA
-Like I predicted, Tommy Lee is hitting on Storm Large. I don’t watch the show, but every time I come across it, she’s just performed and he’s flirting with her. I did hear her say to him, “Six letters Tommy: G-o-o-g-l-e.” That spells “Google”. And of course I did. This chick is weird. Weird and freaky. Which couldn’t be any more perfect for our boy Tommy Lee. I guarantee he’s already hit that and still is on a consistent basis. I can also guarantee she won’t win that contest for the sole fact that it’ll come across as rigged if she did. Then again, I have no idea who can sing on that show since I don’t watch. Maybe she will win. What’s the prize besides being the lead singer of that band. Contracting hepatitis C?
CELEBRITY NEWS
-Lance Bass is gay. This kind of upset me. Not the fact that he came out, but the fact that this was like the lead story in every magazine, and on every newscast. I was shocked. You know what’s news? If Lance Bass announced he was having a hot, steamy, strictly sexual relationship with Jessica Alba. That would’ve been news. He’s gay? Uhhhh, ok. This is the same guy that used to wear rhinestone jackets on stage, highlights his hair, and sang songs titled “Bye, Bye, Bye”. Tell me something I don’t know. Like Joey Fatone is skinny.
-And how about not only announcing he’s gay, but that his boyfriend is Reichen from the Amazing Race. Well, I don’t watch the Amazing Race. I just know Reichen from his Oscar winning performance in “The Scorned” with all the other reality stars. Lance Bass and Reichen Lemkuhl are in a relationship. Makes my heart skip a few beats, I tell ya’. Nice picture on the cover of “People”. Honestly, do you think they could’ve found a more feminine picture than that? And in big yellow letters, “I’M GAY”. Why not just have him do the jazz hands look while you’re at it. Unbelievable.
-Pamela Anderson married Kid Rock last week. And will marry him again in three more cities because, well, I guess they feel the need to christen every city she’s never had sex in. With him. I thought I read something the other day where it is now illegal to marry white trash in more than one city? Anyone else see that story? Just stay off the party boats in Havasu you two, and leave the video cameras at home. Kid, or Mr. Rock, has already gotten in trouble with Scott Stapp from Creed for their homemade videos with girls, he doesn’t need another one. There is actually a betting website out there right now that has odds on how long before Kid Rock is caught cheating on Pam. The date they gave was Oct. 1st of 2007. That’s the easiest bet you’ll ever make. If Tommy Lee swung his hammer around town when he was married to Pam, what makes us think Kid won’t?
Reality Television Show Links
posted by reality steve at 11:52 PM
4 Comments:
Great podcast again! Please tell me you are watching "One Ocean View" on ABC. It's a 30 something Real World and is so pathetic...you would love it. The highlight of the first night was when KJ's cousin Eric showed up at the bar (you may remember Eric Neis (sp?) from the Real World New York)-HILARIOUS!
Yea. I finally got the Itunes link to work. Now I can catch up.
Love your column but enjoy reading it not listening to it. Can;t seem to listen without others listening too. My kids just don't get it. Please post too!
Love the Podcast baby! Thanks for keeping me entertained - and informed :)
Oh PS: thanks for the shoutout from my email!
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