Since it’s killing me that I’m not able to share the bombshell of a finale the “Bachelor” has coming, and I’m horrible at keeping secrets, I figured to be fair, I’d open it up to the sleuthers out there whose lives seem to revolve around this sort of stuff. Not that I haven’t read all your guesses thus far, but frankly, I want to keep reading more because they’re funny. Especially the one about me using the phrase “asleep at the wheel” in a post this week. Come to find out some nut job writes there’s a band here in Texas called “Asleep at the Wheel,” who has a song about a girl, and they dissected those lyrics looking for clues. Listen, first off, I’ve never heard of that band in my life. Second, I’m not smart enough to come up with something like that. And lastly, I’m sure “Asleep at the Wheel” sucks. No offense.
So, for the next four weeks leading up to the finale, in my Tuesday column, I will be giving a clue out regarding the finale. Could be a clue about a person. Could be about a place. Could be about a thing. Could be about anything for that matter (Hey, I didn’t say this was going to be easy). The clues will be short, difficult, and probably never figured out. But hey, knock yourself out trying. Don’t bother playing 20 questions with me after I give the clue because it’s not going to help. Take the clue for what it is and go to town. And hey, the clue might only lead you to a small piece of the puzzle. The finale is going to be a big deal after it airs.
Last thing I will say this regarding this exclusive “Bachelor” news. I wouldn’t be surprised if parts of the finale leaked out before it airs. I mean, we are still over a month away and people have plenty of time on their hands. But that doesn’t worry me since there is more to the story than what would possibly get leaked, I can promise you that. So come the Tuesday after the finale airs, gather all your friends and children around the computer that day, come to this site, and you will know EVERYTHING I know. This is going to be a column you don’t want to miss. The doubters are coming in full force, and there’s nothing I can do about that. Have I ever used my site to break news? Not really. Every now and then I tip people off about certain things, but in no way would I ever consider this site your #1 source for spoilers. I was the first site to ever publicly announce Meredith and Ian were broken up, but other than that, I don’t claim to know any more than most people. But when I get hold of news this big regarding this season, I figured I’d let people know. Honestly, I have no reason to lie. I gain nothing from leading you on for the next month only to disappoint. All of what I know will be revealed the morning after the finale airs. At that point, you still may choose not to believe what I know. And that’s fine. But after giving you a heads up a month ahead of time about something pretty major happening, and then that something major DOES happen, I think it’ll add to my credibility, and you’ll probably wanna hear me out. I’ve already starting writing it as we speak.
But until then, let’s have a little fun. Your first clue is upcoming in Tuesday’s column. Good luck. See you then.