Bachelor Finale Recap – 3/14/11 Including Your First Confirmed Contestant for the “Bachelorette”

For episode-by-episode spoilers of Brad’s season, click on the link above that says “Bachelor Brad Spoilers” (it’s like, 1″ inch above this sentence. Twice). It had a breakdown of every date, rose, and elimination, all the way down to Brad’s final choice. Which of course was modified since there was some kinda big news revealed on Feb. 28th. Don’t know if you heard.

This column is strictly going to focus on the ATFR and the aftermath of this season. I never recap the 2 hour finale in the season ending recap for the sole reason that there’s really no point. It’s a lot of mush, a lot of nothing, a lot of dead time where not a lot goes on. Plus, we knew the outcome, so it’s not like anything you saw last night should’ve surprised you. What surprised me though was sometimes I wonder whether or not people actually read my site, or they play the “telephone” game with friends and things get completely lost in translation. I was shocked, to say the least, at how many tweets and emails I got right around the time Brad sent Chantal packing last night along the lines of “You were wrong!”, or, “You said he picked Chantal” etc. Have people not read ANYTHING on this site since Feb. 28th? I mean, maybe you missed the column that Monday the 28th where I stated there was a different ending, but in every column since then (and there’s been five of them), it was repeated numerous times Brad is engaged to Emily. Very bizarre.

I’m not going to sit here and say “I told you so”, but all you have to do is go back really to Feb. 24th and realize that every single thing I’ve told you about what I heard happened played out exactly like I said it would. To save you the time of reading six or seven different posts, just wanted to refresh your memory of everything I’ve told you since then in cliff notes version:

-That Ashley H would be the next “Bachelorette” when no one had any reason to believe she was
-That Chantal was already dating someone new
-That Brad and Emily got engaged in South Africa and were still engaged to this day
-That there was nothing out of the ordinary for the final rose ceremony. Both girls show up, he dumps Chantal and proposes to Emily
-That Ricki was not part of the finale
-That on the ATFR, it is brought up that Chantal was happy and had moved on with someone else
-That Brad and Emily have already broken up once
-That the ATFR would be unlike any past ones and would have more tense and awkward moments than in seasons past
-That Brad and Emily are still engaged but that they’ve definitely struggled with their relationship
-That the three “successful” couples will come back as sort of an intervention to give Brad and Emily advice on how to get through the media blitz

I’d say that’s about as good as you’re gonna get. For three months was I wrong about Brad and Chantal being together? Absolutely. But ever since Feb. 24th, every word I’ve written on this site has ended up turning out to be true. I’m definitely happy I was able to redeem myself and if you think that somehow ABC is on to me, or they know my sources, or I won’t have anything in the future, you couldn’t be more wrong. If they were, how did I get everything from Feb. 24th on about the finale and ATFR? The more seasons this franchise keeps producing, the more seasons I will spoil. It’s as simple as that. I mean, here we are on March 15th (Three years to the day that I adopted Maddie by the way), and already I’m about to give you news on Ashley Hebert’s season, which begins filming either today or tomorrow from what I’m told.

So in honor of Ashleys season beginning filming this week, I figured I’d give you the name and picture of one of our first confirmed contestants. Right now, I’ve currently got five names and a couple pictures, but I’ll just do one today, then I’m sure as I continue with updates, you’ll be getting more and more info as the season continues filming. Just because we’re in the “off season” of this show doesn’t mean there’s news to report. The “off season” is actually where most of my work is done. So just like last “off season” (October thru December), I will be updating you on spoilers and confirming contestants. Anyway, this guys name is Benjamin (Ben) Castoriano, and he’s a lawyer from New Orleans. Click here to look at one of his bio pages. Also, here are a couple pictures of him.

Ben Castoriano

“Ashley and Ben, sittin’ in a tree…” Ok, maybe it’s a little early for that, but I just thought I’d get the party started early on this one. I wonder if Ben is gonna slap her out of the limo? Or show up that night and say, “Wait a second. Where’s Chantal? Or Michelle?” Awwwww, I’m kidding. I’m glad Ashley is the “Bachelorette” and am actually looking forward to her season. Not that I care whether or not she ends up in love, but to me, she’s likable and by all means if things work out for her, then that’d be a good thing. If not, oh well. Just be another failed couple from this show, which there are plenty of, so no shame in that. On to last night…

Here was the video from my “Good Morning Texas” appearance yesterday morning. A lot of fun. Hopefully we can do this every season so more people in the DFW area will hear me spoil the ending. Awesome.

First want to thank everyone who came out to Bailey’s last night for the viewing party. Great crowd, sorry that the seating was a little scarce, but I thought the audio problem got fixed and for the most part everyone had a good time. I know Laurel got her fair share of questioning from people, but after that ATFR show last night, I think it’s pretty safe to say that, well, maybe she isn’t off her rocker like most people seem to think. We’ll get to that later. But thanks again everyone for coming out. I took more pictures than I can possibly remember, half of which I don’t remember all that much, but it was still a good time all around. I’m sure we’ll do it again for Ashleys premiere of the “Bachelorette” on May 23rd, so set your calendars now.

Wanted to also remind everyone to the “Reality Rocks Expo” happening at the LA Convention Center on April 9th & 10th that I will be attending. Actually, I’ll only be there Saturday the 9th due to a prior obligation on Sunday, but it should be pretty fun. Click on the link below as it has all the details and information you need to know from who’s gonna be there, to what type of discussions and panel events they’re having, etc:

Looks like they’re adding more and more people as we get close to the event, and as I mentioned last week, at some point I will have free passes to give away. So here’s what I want you to do. If you are interested in going to the event, send me an email stating that you are. Just so you know I will be fair about who gets the tickets, I’m going to do a drawing on one of my upcoming video blogs so you can actually witness me choosing the name. Hell, maybe I’ll have Maddie choose it. I still don’t know how many passes I’ll be getting, but I was told I would be getting some in exchange for promoting their event and being a sponsor. So if you’re interested, just send me a quick email so I can put those emails aside until the drawing. The event is in a month, so it looks like I’ll do the drawing in 2 weeks. That’ll give anyone out of state who may end up winning time to book a flight and hotel. These passes are just for entrance into the event and nothing else.

One last thing before I give my thoughts on everything we saw last night, and that’s in regards to Molly and Jason on the ATFR. Outside of the “Wow, Emily is a kind of a bitch” emails which have been the #1 topic on emails and tweets, the second biggest topic was Molly saying during the ATFR how hard it was to watch Jason propose to someone else. This led many people to believe that meant Molly and Jason had been in touch with each other before Jason and Melissa broke up. Huh? I mean, I know it was two years ago and maybe some people’s memories escape them, but that that was not an admission of anything. When Jason/Molly/Melissa taped that ATFR, it was in late January of 2009, a full six weeks before their finale aired. So when they left that taping and Jason and Molly began their relationship from that day on, there was still six weeks of episodes to watch every Monday night. That was what was so unusual about that whole situation is they taped the ATFR six weeks before the show was done. Then remember, they had an ATFR 2 that taped a few days before the finale, and that’s where Jason and Molly gave us an update on what the previous six weeks had been like, and they announced Jillian as the “Bachelorette”. Just wanted to clarify that for the numerous people who emailed me in the last 12 hours to tell me Jason and Molly were lying about never having seen each other.

To be even more clear, here’s the timeline of how that all went down:

-Jan. 2009: Jason’s season begins airing
-End of Jan 2009: After only about 3 or 4 episodes of the show have aired, the ATFR 1 is taped, Jason dumps Melissa, and starts seeing Molly off camera
-Feb 2009: The show is continuing to air while Jason and Molly are having their safe house visits
-March 2009: ATFR 1 is shown right after the finale airs, even though it was taped six weeks previous
-Next night: ATFR 2 is shown, Jason and Molly come back to tell everyone what the last six weeks have been like together.

I think that’s about as clear as I can make it. Molly didn’t reveal anything scandalous last night by saying watching him propose to Melissa was hard on her.

99 thoughts on “Bachelor Finale Recap – 3/14/11 Including Your First Confirmed Contestant for the “Bachelorette”

  1. WOW! Editing is awesome. I never knew till last night that Emily was such a raging bitch. She is such a child and her age really showed last night. I have no idea why Brad is hanging on to her. He deserves love and not to constantly live in the shadow of a ghost. He let Ashley go when it became apparent she wasn’t sure about moving to Austin and now Emily got the guy and won’t move? Yeah, he may have a temper but I would be too if I had to deal with her all the time, and I am a woman. Just watching her on the last episode and AFTR, I wanted to bitch slap her. It would drive anyone’s temper over the edge. No wonder she was single for 6 years. She is such an immature brat and he deserves a woman. He needs to walk away. The reason those other couples were successful was in every instance, someone moved to the other. Emily needs to hook up with a frat boy, at least he would match her level of maturity. Just because you pop out a kid at 18 and live off the baby daddy parents does not mean you are a woman.

  2. WTF is up with ABC choosing controlling, angry men for The Bachelor. According to what we’ve read here in the RealitySteve blogosphere, ABC vets the contestants pretty extensively. Just apparently not for the lead role. Geesh, ABC.

    And speaking of “Wow,” I am amazed at the negative comments here about Emily. Good for her that she has enough sense of self to put the brakes on a relationship with an angry control freak.

  3. First off, anyone who doesn’t like Steve should just leave. . . They are jealous. . .

    I think like so many people Emily is putting on a good face and going to leave Brad. He doesn’t want to be questioned, and he just wants a girl who is pretty and agree with him 100% of the time. Maybe he should go hang out with the NatGeo guys on that Taboo episode of people who are married to plastic dolls.

    Brad slept with Chantel AFTER he already knew he was going to pick Emily. I think she was crying because she understood he knew well before the treehouse what he was going to do, and banged her anyways. Emily is pissed because he banged Chantel in the treehouse, and I’m sure stupidly told her beforehand he knew he wanted to pick her weeks before he got to. . . Uh, why sleep with someone Emily knows and is going to see you did it on TV?

    And who the hell is Brad to question Emily for questioning him about if he understands what it is to be a parent? He really showed his true colors that night. . . Shame on Emily for even agreeing to be with him at the end. That is a MASSIVE red flag. When I saw that, I was screaming NO EMILY at the TV. . .

    Early on, I was happy he picked Chantal per the spoilers, but by the time Steve had updated them, I was noticing a pattern and thought Emily may be the “yes sir” woman he was looking for, so I was glad he chose her. I’m glad she surprised me, had a back bone, and is so not that into him even though I really do believe he is into her!

  4. A couple of things:

    Emily kept sabbatoging the realationship because I really don’t think she wanted it to succeed. But Hound Dog Brad just wouldn’t quit and kept coming back for more. I agree with the 80%. This is probably not going to make it.

    I was rooting for Chantal. I think she was the one for him and he just cannot see it. He has such an image of what he wanted (someone like his mother) that he just couldn’t admit his soulmate was Chantal. He will see it when it is way too late. Maybe he really doesn’t want anyone. He couldn’t handle Chantal because she is way too open and vulnerable and he really doesn’t want to be open. Being open scares him, whether he knows it or not. Emily is quiet and private, so he doesn’t have to be open with her, either. Problem is, then nothing gets solved. If Emily does speak up then it makes him mad, for she is not the doting little wife and dares to defy him. Believe me, I know. I just described my mom and dad to a tee.

    Third, I was (am?) a lot like Brad. My dad was gone five days out of seven and when he was home it was not to give attention to me. He was an angry person. He never played with me. We never even played catch. Never went on vacations. Never had father-son talks or moments. No fishing or hunting. In other words, an absentee father who actually supported us. Bottom line, I have anger issues. I have been working on it for 40 years. It is very hard to cure because it is so deep rooted with many roots. What I’m saying is, Brad is in for a hard, hard, hard road if he is going to change. It won’t happen any time soon and he will need a very, very, very loving and dedicated wife to help him and put up with him. I would second that bet that they aren’t going to make it.

    Although I was rooting for Chantal, she is actually better off without him.

    I agree with JH, Chantal felt used. How could she have done what she did and he never even loved her. Jimmy Kimmel asked Brad how many of the girls Brad had sex with. After the shock wore off and Brad thought for 60 seconds, at least, while stumbling for words, he said none while on the show. That was clearly a lie. Chantal had a right to be pissed. And Brad never did answer her question, which in a way answered her question. Hence the second crying fit on ATFR. She realizes he is a douche.

    Brad could have kept Ashley, who never said she loved him, and let Chantal go before she thought she was the F1. To keep her when he knew way before Chantal wasn’t it was cruel. Probably more ABC bulls**t to create drama. I am so glad Chantal has moved on to a real relationship, although I would have watched her season much to my better judgement.

    I agree with RTV. Brad was just making excuses why he sent girls home when the same traits were in Emily

    Reality Steve: I saw a show several years ago about the first six bachelor seasons. ABC admitted that the lead chose the final three girls and then ABC filled in the others with their choices to create drama, grant fame, etc. In each of the six cases, the lead ended up with the same three girls in the final three. And the final one. Do you know if this is still the pattern?

  5. You guys, I seriously want to stop hearing about Laurel! What kind of person has any relationship with someone, and then as soon as that someone goes into the spotlight, you decide to dump all of your dirty laundry out on the world.

    I don’t believe a word she says. Jilted exes looking for a share of the spotlight simply aren’t credible. I wish people would stop talking about her and she would go away.

    Emily and Brad are as confusing for us viewers as they are confused themselves, I think.

  6. Don’t you think that it was probably the show’s idea to do the wedding? I mean, it doesn’t make much sense to me either, but from Emily’s responses last night, it definitely doesn’t seem like she was ever on board with it. It seems like maybe they suggested it, and it completely freaked her out.

  7. No one seemed to notice the body language. Emily was clinging on to Brad, and he was pulling away. Watch it again to see. It is so obvious that he is pissed at her for the things she is saying. NOT GOOD! Run Emily, run! I also thought Brad was smarmy, only saw the end of his last season, all this season I thought he was a big dork and very fake. IF( ok I may be naive) he did sleep with Chantal, UGH, SICK! But really, Emily should have known, I mean she must have seen this show before. She should not have watched or had a good support system of people to help her thru the emotions after seeing the show. Don’t think they’ll make it. And the red flags went up when he said he wanted to talk to Ashley about where they stood and then he dumped her. Wonder why, did he think he was going to get more from Chantal? Gross, just gross!

  8. I thought Emily was very sweet when Brad proposed and she knelt down to kiss him before he even gave her the ring. I also like the way she rubbed his back any time they hugged. I didn’t think she was cold at all. I think a lot of Chantal’s tears were based on the fact her ex husband is newly engaged and she just doesn’t want to be alone. Look how quickly she ‘got over’ Brad and is now involved in a new relationship. Most people would rather be the one to drop someone than be dropped. Seriously. Having the runner up at After the Final Rose always seems kind of cruel unless you are announcing they are the next Bachelorett.

  9. Why didn’t you comment on Chris Harrisons hair on ATFR?? Oh my word, he looked like a middle aged lesbian! Side burns and a skinny tie… fluffy moussed and teased bouffant… long in the back. It was the best thing about the show!!

  10. I firmly believe that Emily is totally in the right. I really relate to her on a lot of levels – I, too, am a single mom with a 5-year old who has never had a father. Until you’re in that situation, you can’t really fathom the seriousness of considering having someone in your life that would also be the only father figure your child has ever know. Heck yeah, that is an intimidating position for any guy to consider filling, but it takes a man with true compassion and an understanding of what REALLY goes into parenting, to fill the role. Though I believe Brad was sincere (and sweet, and well-intended) with his commentary about wanting to be a father to Ricki, his reaction to her attempts to give him a ‘reality check’ was, to me, a true red flag.

    It’s not about you, Brad. It’s not about her not believing in the power that is Brad. It’s about a child. It’s about a mother whose main concern is her daughter, and a woman who can’t risk marrying a man who may decide at some point that “whoa, I didn’t really realize what I was getting myself into, here.” She was doing the RIGHT THING, exactly what I’d have done in her position, and he took it as a personal stab and could barely contain himself. Yikes.

    Why she should be expected to uproot her daughter and the only family Ricki has ever known, for a guy she’s just met who spent their entire relationship making out with and intimately involved with other women, is beyond me. Brad can open a freaking bar in North Carolina. Give me a break. If he really had her best interests at heart, he’d see that in a heartbeat.

    Brad was *almost* likeable, but his self-absorption will ruin whatever chance he and Emily ever had.

  11. @Midwest girl: Wow! It sounds like you need to be next in line behind Brad for anger management counseling.

    I agree with most people on here that Brad seems to have some major control and anger issues and Brad and Emily most likely won’t last. His reaction to her questioning him about being a father to her child was ridiculous. She probably did see a red flag at that point. Maybe they edited out a lot more of that conversation that would make his reaction make more sense???
    Someone commented that saying Brad is abusive is way over the line. I agree. But, I’ve seen no one on here suggest that he is abusive at all; only that he seems controlling and have anger issues. Big difference.

    Someone also commented here that Brad picked the girl who looks so much like his sister in law. WHAT??? She looks nothing like her. Blonde hair is where that resemblance ends.

    I watched Ashley H (who shall from here on out be known as Jazz Hands) on Jimmy Kimmel last night. She is so highly annoying! I can not figure out why they picked herfor the Bachelorette. There are at least 3 other girls who are better candidates in my opinion.

    And why are so many people convinced that Brad and Chantal did the deed in their “fantasy suite”, aka “crappy tree house in the middle of the African wildlife/elements/bugs with no modern conveniences”? He picked the one with the least privacy and worst set up for sex. You would think he would have saved the tree house for Ashley after the way their day had gone.

  12. Brad has MAJOR anger issues. He can’t even hold it together with ABC cameras in his face. His body language is so telling with the red face, steam coming out of his ears, needs to leave the room, etc. Emily is financed by the Hendricks and is smart enough to know where her bread is buttered and not screw that up. Where else would she come up with enough money to get veneers on her teeth (about $1,500 per tooth). If Brad were a 25 year-old NASCAR driver, she would be drooling all over him. Is there any truth to the fact that she spends tons of time at the racetrack? Brad was going for an Academy Award last night because he doesn’t want random people in the street throwing beer cans at him again. I really don’t think with his personality he gives a rats ass about her now, nor has any idea what it would be like to raise a child, let alone a stepchild.

  13. @jabean…

    Only Brad and Chantal know for sure what happened in the treehouse, but I would bet “the house” that they did more than just sleep next to each other. I could give you at least 10 reasons why, but none is bigger than Chantal’s extended exit interview in the limo on the abc site. She was something to the effect of “My biggest fear was that I would give myself…” and then she stumbles to correct it by saying “over to this”. Also, explains why she was crying ATFR, even thought has a new love interest.

    Also for anyone else interested, Mike Fleiss, the creepest person alive, just did a new interview and he answers a question about RS.

    “Reality Steve spent most of the season predicting that Chantal will be the winner. Once he owned up to being wrong, fans crowed that he had been `Fleiss’d.’ Did you or anyone involved in the show feed him misinformation?”

    “I wish I could take credit but he duped himself. He’s nuts, a goofball. He says these things with 100 percent conviction but he’s right only half of the time. It doesn’t matter that much to us, it’s just that he acts like he knows everything. He’s the Michele Bachmann of reality TV facts. But the leaks are not really coming from production. They’re coming from former cast members. That’s a hard thing to police. The best way to combat him is to let himself shoot himself in the foot.”

    Here is the link for anyone that wants to read the whole interview…

    http://insidetv.ew.com/2011/03/15/the-bachelor-creator-ashley-h/

  14. Dude you are delusional. You act like you called everything and nothing was a surprise. Did you know that the ATFR was supposed to have been a wedding? Did you know that Emily wasn’t wearing her ring? Did you know that Emily and Brad had broken up and gotten back together.

    There was a ton of information on the show and you didn’t get any of it. You spent 8 weeks insisting that someone else was going the show.

    Then you post “I told you so” Are you clinically schizo? Or delusional.

  15. Did anyone else REEEAAALLLY buy the fact that Emily wasn’t wearing her ring because it was being resized? Whatever!

    Regarding Ashley H. as the next Bachelorette – her new look just goes to show you how some of these contestants are products of ABC…I would have been happier about this choice if she would have remained how we saw her on Brad’s season.

  16. Realitystevecomment Poster wrote: Dude you are delusional. You act like you called everything and nothing was a surprise. Did you know that the ATFR was supposed to have been a wedding? Did you know that Emily wasn’t wearing her ring? Did you know that Emily and Brad had broken up and gotten back together.

    Did you NOT read his column before Monday nights episode aired? If you did, then you would have realized he addressed this before it aired, apparently you suffer from “selective reading”……He did mention all of the above with those details. Go back and read yourself. Not sure why you’re pointing the righteous finger when you haven’t done your research.

  17. I don’t get it! Why everybody said Brad used Chantal for sex? Did I miss something?

  18. @amsf32 – I think we may have seen the same red flag at the same time!

    I think that just as Emily sees herself as a standalone human being with intrinsic value and worth, as opposed to the more traditional “property asset,” she also views her child the same way, and that will of necessity have an impact on her views on the subject of parenting.

    Again, leaving aside that this is a reality show, and just looking at it from a cultural context point of view, I don’t think that the questions she had were at all unusual or alarming of themselves, though I can certainly see how they would be extremely upsetting to Brad.

    Brad may not be the crispiest fry in the bag, but it seemed to me that he was able to get that HER perception of his role would be maybe a little bit more “hands on” than his own more traditional view of the father as someone who basically earns income and “plays with” the kids on occasion.

    The idea that he might be expected to get out of bed and go administer baby aspirin and by implication, possibly deal with some bodily fluids, or spend his Saturday waiting around the emergency room WITH Emily in the wake of a routine childhood injury would be understandably upsetting to a man who has a strong belief that the mother is, as a given, the actual caregiver.

    His idea of being a good father would likely be in the context of paying the bill for the medical treatment without complaint.

    Emily’s notion of “father material” as someone who will not only be willing, but eager, to share the same day-to-day child care tasks she performs is hardly unique in the US culture, especially among the younger generations, and it may well be that the age difference comes in a little bit here – Brad is not exactly a geezer, but he’s about half a generation older than she is!

    But it doesn’t really matter whether the divergence in their views is related to age or upbringing or personal conviction. The resulting impact on both adults and the child would be the same.

    What will be fascinating to the cultural anthropology nerds among us is the reaction to what is perceived as an alarming duality of Emily’s nature – how can she be “ladylike” and “traditional” while at the same time having these expectations of a man caring for home and children, a single standard with regard to issues of physical intimacy with other people, and of course the assumption that her established home would enjoy an equal place at the table as his when deciding where they would live!

    It’s seen as almost an insult – how dare she speak and behave with courtesy and decorum when she has these modern ideas!

    Conversely, many of those who share those “modern ideas” of women as standalone human beings with the same innate value as penis owners find Brad’s worldview to be just as offensive!

    So here’s where the reality show gives us the “real life” takeaway: Become your own pre-emptive Heartbreak Avoidance Strategist.

    Forget what Patty Stanger says and go ahead and talk about this stuff on the first date. Talk about whether each wants kids or not. Talk about joint versus separate checking accounts. Talk about prenups.

    The time for those conversations is before anybody has a chance to become emotionally invested in any way, much less fall in love. That way, both have the chance to save face and either enjoy a casual hookup, or simply walk – before anybody gets hurt!

  19. Here’s my thought after having watched this travesty of a season and the only highlight being Steve’s blogs & site.

    I believe, with every fiber of my being, that sweet, precious little Emily fully intended, from the very beginning, to be the female “Jason” Bachelorette. I think she played a role the whole season and is used to stringing men along to get exactly what she wants, and that it was always her intention to be the one Brad doesn’t pick at the finale so she could be the next Bachelorette. She probably had it all planned out, “From Tragedy to Triumph: The Ricki Needs A Daddy Season.” Then Brad made the stupid mistake of picking her and letting Chantal (the one clearly best for him) go. I think it pissed her off because her hopes are dashed and it wouldn’t be “proper” for her to go on Bachelor Pad2, so what is she to do now?

    I don’t think it was her bitchy side that came out on ATFR, it was Who She Actually Is. AND, I’ll also say this: IF, and that’s a big If, IF Emily decides to stay with Brad, not only will the constant manipulations keep happening, but I can almost guarantee she’ll keep stringing him along until he finally says, almost as if it were his own idea (like Inception!), that the best way to have her is to MOVE TO NORTH CAROLINA! She’ll talk about uprooting little Ricki from her grandparents and the “only life she’s ever known” and Brad will go for it. Emily will not allow Brad to take away her “prize” of a grand and very public marriage, when he’s already taken her original springboard to fame, whichi s Being the next Bachelorette. My money’s on her to win.

  20. Does anyone else find it a bit off the way Emily tells that whole dramatic story about her previous partner’s death? We heard her tell it almost verbatim to the women in the house, and to Brad, and it seems like a self-indulgent alternative to simply saying ‘My daughter’s dad passed away.’ Here’s the most worrisome example: When your possible future brother-in-law asks you how your daughter’s dad will feel about you moving to Austin, the correct response — if your daughter’s dad has passed away — is simply three words: ‘He passed away’- then there would be a moment of awkward apology on the part of the possible future brother-in-law, and then the conversation would move on to another topic; instead, Emily offers Brad’s brother whom she just met 10 minutes ago a dramatic telling starting with ‘It was a rainy Sunday morning…’

    I feel terrible for her and her story is tragic; but it seems a red flag to me (and a sign of her being not fully ready for a new relationship) that she can’t just tell someone ‘he passed away’. She needs to find a way to carry her love for her deceased partner in her heart while opening a genuine space for a new partner, and this whole ‘It was a rainy Sunday morning’ thing seems worrisome to me along those lines… That story should of course be shared with Brad, but the whole fact that she pulls it out when anyone asks her about her daughter’s dad suggests to me that she is trapped in the past.

  21. I agree with be (above); Emily’s rehersed dramatic telling of her baby daddy was getting REAL old. Why could she just say “he passed away” like any other normal person would? ‘It was a rainy Sunday morning…’like ‘It was a dark and stormy night…..” Geez. The more attention and the more sympathy the better, right?

    Also, Why does Brad expect Emily or ANY woman to move to Austin? Why can’t HE move? If he chose a woman that has a child, much less a very rich child with very rich grandparents, why would expect Emily to uproot her child? I think that is asking a lot. He can start a business/restaurant/bar anywhere, even in North Carolina. Sounds pretty selfish on his part expect someone to move for him.

    I think both of them should give up this relationship, because it is so obvious that it isn’t going to last.

  22. this realtionship is done , Brad wakeup she has no clue what she wants , stop i had more repect for you in the last show …this one you are plain stupid

  23. What makes everyone so sure Chantal and Brad did the deed? That treehouse was the worst place to have sex: no bathroom, really hot, and tons of bugs all around. I highly doubt that happened. I think Chantal was upset b/c she told Brad she loved him several times and that if he didn’t feel like he could see them together at the end, to just send her home now (she said this in at least 2 episodes). I think Emily’s upset b/c there was chemistry between Chantal and Brad- remember when Chantal was in his shirt? I mean, none of this means that Brad and Chantal did anything in that treehouse.

    On another note. I wish I thought things would work out between the two of them, but I don’t think it will. Maybe Brad truly loves her and would be a great husband and father, or maybe he has terrible anger issues and would be a terrible husband or father. Maybe Emily loves Brad, but can’t handle what she saw every Monday night, or she’s worried about his temper affecting her and her daughter. Who knows? The show’s over, let’s move on. It’s their lives to figure out, not ours.

  24. Hi Steve, I love your blog simply because you have the same sense of humor as me and seem to see the same ridiculous crap that I do. Congrats on making some money off of it. I just can’t stop thinking that this is the WHITEST, STRAIGHTEST, show EVER. Can anyone think of a reality show that caters more to the straight/white demographic in this country. For God’s sake switch it up a little and have a bisexual woman on or maybe someone who is actually interested in black people rather than having one black girl on and kicking her off in the third episode so you don’t seem racist.

  25. OMG people get over the fact that there is a lack of diversity on this show. It’s called Marketing. They make shows to appeal to THEIR demographics. If the majority of viewers are white females, why in the would would they choose to appeal to african american or hispanic viewers?? It just doesn’t make sense. It’s not about people being racist, it’s about making money. The more people that watch this show, the more money they make. It’s that simple. As long as they maintain their current demographics, they will probably never going to have a gay, bisexual, african american, etc. bachelor/bachelorette.

  26. Be and Dewey,

    I agree to a point. I found Emily’s telling of that story perfectly legitimate when she was talking to Brad, the cameras, and even the girls, but when she was telling Brad’s family, I was very uncomfortable. The only reason I can think she did that was to be very clear that she was engaged to him and loved him?

  27. I read Ben’s Bio, and it says he is fluent in French. I’m pretty sure that will get his foot in the door with Ashley, and/or give him more brownie points with her and possibly her family. So, I expect to see a good bit of him on next season’s Bachelorette.

    This past season of the Bachelor, I felt they did a great job casting so I am hoping for some good male contestants to watch this summer.

  28. I completely agree with Julia about the demographics of the show. Why don’t people get it? I know I, for one, would have absolutely NO interest in watching a gay or bisexual version of the show and I happen to fit right into the demographic for the Bachelor.

  29. Maybe this is Brad’s intention all along to be dumped. He got crucified by the public when he dumped both Jenny and DeAnna, now he “claims” and I use that word loosely, to have found his soul mate and true love and is professing to want to marry her immediately, and here’s Emily pushing back saying not so fast we have issues to where in two or maybe six months they will have ended their relationship because Emily wasn’t prepared to fully accept him and refused to move to Austin making Brad the one who gets dumped in the end. Now suddenly everyone will be sympathetic to him and feel bad for him and Emily will be the enemy.

    Maybe his intent is to turn his image around in his favor this time.

    Just a thought.

  30. I for one would not watch a gay, bi sexual bachelor or bachelorette, besides they did a show like that years ago on a different network where the bachelor was gay and 1/2 the contestants were straight. I believe it was only on for one season, that’s how well it did.

    ABC is owned by Disney people, they are going to cater to white, straight people only, they are in no way doing the interracial relationship, I don’t care if it’s 2011 it’s still considered Taboo or do the gay/bi sexual theme, it’s Disney people..HELLO?

  31. My heart goes out to Emily. She is dealing with public scrutiny and Brad’s temper. She seems so sweet and reserved, but somehow it makes people angry if sweet reserved girls stick up for themselves. So people call her a bitch. Come on! this is the 21st century people!

    I saw how Brad got angry when she was asking him about being a parent. That is a big red flag. but then she blamed herself. I can see how maybe she tries to communicate, he gets mad, she then shuts down, he then gets nervous and tries to get her to marry him (prematurely) so that she can’t get away.

    It seems obvious

  32. ….oops, pressed the submit button by mistake…

    It seems obvious to me that Emily broke off the engagement and gave the ring back to Brad. Didn’t seem like Emily wanted the ring back.

    Brad seems rather possessive and insisting on getting married before the show is over is just nuts. If he’s so serious about it, and so serious about being a father, he should move to NC and live in Em’s beautiful house. If he really cared about her, he would do that. I’m sure he can arrange that, it not rocket science.

  33. @HeidiT good point, I have thought that too. Brad is making himself out to be the good guy, ‘I would marry her right now’ blah blah blah.

    He has really set up an almost impossible situation. He had to pick a girl with a child who has strong family ties in NC (the Hendricks family, who is probably supporting Em and Ricki). And he refuses to leave Austin for some reason.

    All that talk about how hard Monday nites were. I’m sure thats true, but I think the issues here go much deeper.

    If they break up for good everyone will blame Em, saying she had too much baggage, she would ‘sabotage’ the relationship… oh yeah, and she was a ‘bitch’…

    Chris H asking Em why she ‘sabotages’ relationships. Why isn’t he questioning Brad about his temper?

    ABC is going to stand behind Brad no matter what. They did that with a-hole Jake the Fake.

  34. @ halley skylight
    I had the same question, how is it that Chantal was able to date someone new? Sure ABC can’t stop her from falling in love, but it seems like they would have some big issues with her publicly dating someone.

  35. I wonder WHY you wouldn’t watch a bisexual or African American contestant. Hmmm, doesn’t require much pondering. And Julia, just because the majority of viewers are white females doesn’t mean their “bachelors” have to all be white. Roberto isn’t white, did that change the ratings? I was just making a point that apparently has been made before. Sorry for being repetitive.

  36. I don’t care to watch a bi-sexual or gay bachelor either. I don’t mind different ethnic groups, religions, and/or races on the show (Roberto’s Latino, and he’s pretty good-looking!). No, I’m not a racist, homophobe, or anything like that. I just want to be able to somewhat identify with the people involved, and I completely fit in to that demographic. It’s not that I don’t like watching gay people; I love Top Chef (which always has a gay or lesbian contestant), and I love Modern Family. But for a reality love story, I want to see heterosexual people’s journey for love (and whatever else their journey is for).

  37. @mommy See, I can totally understand that. You are interested in watching something you can relate to; that makes sense. I just found it slightly baffling (then again I am from NYC) that people consider interracial (well, I guess just black and white) relationships taboo. It makes me wonder, if Roberto didn’t “win” and was the next Bachelor, would people be more willing to watch if his “ladies” were all white or all white and latina rather than white, black and latina? And if there were black women on the show would the audience be rooting for the white chick? I guess its all interesting from a sociological perspective and depressing from an intellectual one lol.

    I also happen to fall into this “straight/white/female” demographic, but I find the show boring and homogenous. I think a bisexual bachelorette would be interesting and at least switch it up a bit. I never said that they should have a gay bachelor or bachelorette, I’m not sure where the previous “posters” got that from. Even though people may be secretly interested in it, that just wouldn’t fly for most of these viewers. Which brings me to think: Is it more interesting to continuously watch failing heterosexual relationships because that is also part of the demographic? So much interesting stuff to analyze! When it comes down to it though, there is a very distinct relationship between homophobia/racism and low IQ/lack of education. So many studies have been done on this. I wonder if that ties into the demographic as well. I am shocked to think if Shamar Moore was the next Bachelor, that less people would watch it! He is one HOT man (he is on Criminal Minds). Maybe it just has to do with how dark their skin is. Who knows, I give up. Lol

  38. P.S. Top chef is wonderful! I just wish I didn’t get so hungry while watching it.

  39. I LOVE Top Chef, too, and I really love this All-Stars season! I only wish I could smell and taste the food they make. It looks delicious!

  40. I loved JANEABELLE’s comment that Emily pulled a switcheroo. I laughed so hard!!

    Here’s my take on Emily & Brad. I watched the whole season and I really wanted to like Brad, but I just couldn’t. He was so uncomfortable whenever he had to deal with the slightest female emotion. You could see him actually getting angry when he asked for reassurance. What the hell? It’s like the guy was completely incapable of putting himself in anyone else’s position. I, personally, could never be with a guy like that. Let’s just look at his last date with Emily. She wants to make sure that he knows what to expect with a child, basically she’s being nice and doesn’t want to see him sign up for something he’s not prepared for… and what does he do? He gets angry. Brad, dude, I hope you watched that episode the same way America did, and said WTF!?! I don’t get the anger. She did nothing wrong. You have serious problems.

    On to Emily… I liked her this whole time, but – do I think she’s the passive Southern Bell they made her out to me? No. Still, I think she was the best choice out of all the girls. Yes, she got tough in the AFTR, but that was probably to be expected. Brad gets mad at the smallest things, then apologizes and then does it again. He looks completely ridiculous. Wait. This was supposed to be about Emily. Well, all I will say is this. Even the nicest girl will eventually fight back when dealing with a total jackass. Doesn’t mean she’s a bitch. Just means she’s human.

    She won’t marry the guy.

  41. @loveislove yes, the show is all about what is statistically an absurdly narrow demographic, but the network has to function in the existing business reality, or as julia puts it, THEIR demographic.

    Of course the show would have a larger number of viewers if it widened the audience appeal net, but if it doesn’t appeal to the suits in the boardroom, it won’t make it to air in the first place.

    Frankly, from their point of view, it’s a win-win.

    You have that narrow “intended” demographic with which the show resonates, all that identifying with the characters, aspiring to these very culture-specific idealized concepts, and then you have other population segments enjoying the show as a sort of of glitzed-up version of a Discovery Channel documentary about the quaint folkways of a primitive tribe in an isolated rain forest, and still others who watch it purely for lulz!

    Now on the pensive side, the most telling and poignant comment is the one from the viewer who declares that she would rather see a romance story about people who share HER demographic characteristics – even if it’s not real!

    There is undeniably, in all that aspiring and romanticizing, a certain element of anticipatory nostalgia, if that’s the right term. The show takes place in the context of a society that is simultaneously undergoing both seismic demographic shifts AND an economic transition.

    That little slice of target market is coming to grips with the challenges of a reality that has very little in common with the expectations inculcated into it since birth.

    This is hardly the place to discuss all that, but there are some very deep and complicated reasons for the enormous appeal of the show, and the intensity of interest in it! ;)

Leave a Reply