Dr. Reality Steve

January 10th, 2013 | 41 Comments | Posted in Dr. Reality Steve

These are your latest inquiries to “Dr. Reality Steve.” The first couple were from December, so I apologize for not getting to those sooner. But knowing that “Dr. Reality Steve” will be in session every Thursday for the remainder of the season, get your questions in early and often. And dammit, where did all the teenie boppers go?

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Dear Steve,

I just found out through mutual friends that the girl my ex ended up dumping me for is having a kid with the guy she was with when my ex was with me. This means my ex is an alleged free man and tho we haven’t spoken since the summer, I am dying to send him an email since the feelings are still there but would it be a good idea not knowing if the feelings are still there or if he’s with another girl?
Thanks!

Comment: I had to re-read this one about ten times to figure out who was who and what was being said. And I’m still a bit confused. So this person who’s emailing me, they have an ex-bf, who dumped them for another girl. The girl that her ex-bf is with is having a kid with the guy she was with before she got with this girl’s ex? Does that sound right?

Whatever the case, since she you didn’t go into detail about your relationship with your ex, I’ll just ask you one question: Why do you want to get back with your ex who dumped you for another girl? Regardless of his situation now, he dumped you to move on to someone else. Obviously there were reasons behind it, and I’m guessing none of them were because you were the most perfect, awesome, caring, loving girlfriend anyone’s ever had. So why do you even want to be with him? There’s nobody else out there that you have to run back to someone who dumped you for someone else? Don’t waste your time. Ain’t gonna work out.
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Dr. Steve,

Okay, so here’s the story.

I had been with this guy for about a year. Everything was going really well for a while until we started having little disagreements a couple of months ago. I had been burned badly in my last relationship and I think I let if affect me in this one. I questioned how much he cared about me on a few occasions, and it really made him upset. He got frustrated because he felt like he continued to show and tell me how much he loved me in so many ways yet I still would question.

In the meantime, we were still planning our life together. He would talk about moving in, getting engaged and getting married. We’d even spoke seriously about kids’ names. When we first started talking about marriage and the future, he thought we should wait a few years. We’re both just 25 and starting out in our careers. I was fine with that. Then, a few weeks later he had talked about maybe getting engaged as early as May. I was a little surprised at the change in timeline but we’re in love and relatively happy so I went with it.

I didn’t think the little arguments were that big of a deal because we would talk about them and move on. Every couple argues. However, I guess he was still not quite over the disagreements and letting it start to build up within him. I also guess it makes sense that I kept letting my insecurities creep up and we’d have the same disagreements on multiple occasions.

This all built up to about 1.5 weeks ago. I made a comment that made him think I was questioning his love for me again, and he completely snapped. He got so angry and hurt and said he couldn’t talk to me anymore and that he wanted to be left alone. I was hurt and confused but didn’t contact him for 4 days to give him time to cool off. I called him 4 days later and he was basically still just as angry as before. On Friday, he came over to my place and we had a discussion that boiled down to it’s not working right now. He said he was very confused about everything because he was so sure of where our lives were going but now he doesn’t know what he wants. He is so upset, etc.

Since then, we’ve talked every day but he says that he needs space. He says that he thinks we’re not good together right now but he doesn’t want to close the door on anything in the future yet he blocked me from Facebook. He says he did it because he got so upset when he saw I changed my profile picture from one of us to one by myself and that I changed my relationship status. He also says that he thinks we can’t go forward to the next stage in our relationship until we take a step back, that we can’t go anywhere if we keep having the same disagreements.

The thing is…I totally understand. He’s right. At the same time, I’m not sure why but seeing how upset he got about the whole thing made me really see how much he does care and does love me. I don’t doubt those feelings anymore, so I just want to make things right. We were so good together aside from that one issue, and I think the issue can really be resolved. I do also understand that he needs his space right now to get over being upset and to kind of start over.

In our last conversation, he said that he just needs a few weeks of space. He said that we should wait until after the holidays are over and that stress has been dealt with and reconvene then. He says we will still talk and hang out and be friends and that he still cares about me. I asked if he meant that we will be friends and that’s it, that there’s no hope of getting back together. He quickly interrupted me and said no, that’s not what he meant, that we’ll take the time apart to grow as individuals and then see from there. He said that we’ll “figure it out” and “make it work.”

My big question to you is this…Am I being delusional for thinking there’s hope that we’ll get back together? Do you think he’s just stringing me along or do you think he really just does need some time and space to get over my hurting him and see where to go from there? Any suggestions as to what I should do?

I hate that I hurt someone I love so much and that it’s taken basically losing him to realize how much he actually did/does care. I feel so dumb for ruining a potential life-long relationship.

Sincerely,
Heartbroken Idiot

Comment: Couple of issues here, and in case you couldn’t tell, this email was sent at the beginning of December, so I have no idea what happened with this situation. But you are dealing with a few things.

First, the whole “relationship status” on Facebook. Some people it bothers, some people it doesn’t. If it bothered him that you changed your picture and relationship status when he just said he needed some time, then maybe you shouldn’t have done that. Seemed a little early to jump the gun and do that and his reaction reflects that.

Second, any time the situation arises where you’re talking about marriage, kids, and a future together, and then within weeks because of an argument he’s talking about needing space, that could be a red flag. Either he’s getting cold feet, or he’s interested in someone else and wants to see if there’s something there. Seems awfully quick of him to go from one extreme to the other so quickly, so you have to keep an open mind that maybe he’s not telling you the full story.

Lastly, he said you guys will “take time apart to grow as individuals and see from there.” That doesn’t sound good to me. I understand the whole “absence makes the heart grow fonder” thing, but if things were going well outside of a few arguments why the quick need for such space? It’s after the holidays so maybe you guys are back together and everythings great again, but just keep this all in mind if he brings it up again during an argument.
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Hi Dr Reality Steve! First off – love the blog and your spoilers make the seasons so much more fun to watch!

I’ve got a bit of an odd relationship with a friend of mine, who I kind of like, and would love a guys opinion on if you think he’s into me as well. I’ve known him for about 5 years and when we met through friends, he was home from military leave. He’s since left the military and came home for a few months before moving 3 hours away to finish his college education (he left after his 1st year of college to join the military). Basically our entire relationship I’ve known him only in spurts of seeing each other every few weeks/months. When we do see each other, most of the time he is very affectionate towards me – finding any way to stand/sit next to me when we’re out with friends, looking for me when I walk away (I’ve caught his eye a few times while out socializing with friends), holding my hand, rubbing my back. We’ve even spent a few nights cuddling together during trips and visits with friends. But he never tries to kiss me – we’ve only kissed once after one of the first times we met. I reciprocate all his small advances back, but just when I get the courage to think I’ll try to make a move the next time I see him, he acts more like we’re just good friends. Most recently, I saw him at a party a few days before Christmas and he was running his fingers through my hair, putting his arm around me, pulling my chair closer to his, holding my hand and really showing that he was interested. Again, he didn’t try to kiss me. So I decided that when I saw him in New Years Eve, I was going to be more aggressive on my end and really show him I’m interested in him and make a move. However, he showed up at my house with another girl who he never mentioned to anyone he was bringing. It completely deflated me. He hardly paid attention to her all night and even followed me around the house as I socialized at times. They shared a quick peck of a kiss at midnight and that was really it. It confused everyone – including my friends – and brought me back to square one as to why I never really make a move.

He’s since gone back to school so I won’t see him for a few months again. Based on his behavior, do you think he actually likes me and maybe is shy to make a move? Maybe it’s because he lives a few hours from me and doesn’t want to start something. He’s surely had plenty of opportunities to make a move on me if that’s all he wanted so I can’t help but think there’s something more going on in his head. I admit while I reciprocate most things, I could be more aggressive to show him I like him back. But at the same time, every time I think I’ll be aggressive, he gives me a reason to back off (ie his New Years Eve date or acting like he’s not interested the next time I see him). I know I should just let it go, and I’m still actively dating. I just wish I knew what his thoughts were bc for a few days after I see him each time, it’s all I think about. I’d love to get your opinion on this!

Comment: I’d let it go. Dude had plenty of times to make a move on you and he didn’t. He doesn’t seem all that interested no matter how many times he held your hand, stroked your hair, and rubbed your neck. Who knows? I’m curious to know what age you guys are because by his actions, that’s something you would do to someone you have an interest in, yet, he never even bothered to kiss you? Bizarre. Move on. Not worth your time. Continue dating and you’ll realize the guys that actually do like you will follow up their hair stroking, hand holding, and neck rubbing ways with something bigger. Like a tongue down your throat and pinning you up against a wall. So there. Tell this guy to grow a sack and worry about other men.
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Hi Steve,

I’m getting to my wit’s end with one of my friends. She’s a hilariously awesome girl with a great career and is a lot of fun, but she has issues with guys. She tends to get really involved in relationships and falls head over heels at (what I think) are mixed signals. She’s been “seeing” this guy for a few months and I don’t know what to tell her anymore. They met through a mutual friend who the guy previously had a thing for (but they never officially dated). They started hanging out one on one as friends and of course, she developed feelings for him. He seemed like he was reciprocating, but then he’d pull back. He will say things that makes it sound like they have a future together, and they would go on a lot of “dates”, but then he’d disappear, or not text back, or just hold back in general. They slept together a few times and the behaviour still continued. He says he has a “list” of things he wants in a girl and she’s “the closest person yet to the list”… I think it’s strange behaviour and that he’s interested long run (this has been going on for almost a year now), but she’s really hung up on him. She insists that she’s okay with them being friends, but she’ll have a meltdown if he blows her off or get super excited if he says something that sounds “date-y”. I don’t know what to tell her anymore… They had one blowout where she made her feelings known and he didn’t reciprocate, yet now they’re back to these old habits. I’m not even sure it’s just about sex for this guy either… they haven’t slept together in a while and she’s been drunk and alone at his house and he told her to go home and not stay. I don’t know what to do as a friend. Should she tell him how she feels? What’s going on in this guy’s head?

Comment: Your friend seems to like the chase this guy is giving her and not much else. Nothing you wrote in that email makes it seem like this guy is all that serious about her, he knows he’s got her wrapped around his finger, and he’s using it to his advantage. What can you do as a friend? Not much, only because telling her the truth is something that she probably doesn’t want to hear. Let her fall on her face with this guy, which will happen eventually, and she’ll see her ways. Later on down the line you can share your feelings with her about what a king douchelicker this guy is and you guys can have a laugh about it.
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41 thoughts on “Dr. Reality Steve

  1. This video was part of an online special of some “über-cool” local blog(from like a year ago) where guys and girls in their 20s were asked about dating, love, sex, biggest mishaps, ridicules first jobs and the kind. Catherine did 2 other spots, i believe, one where she talked about bringing her first bf home to meet her mom and one about a part time job, where she had to dress up as a zebra to promote a club…
    And.. for all I know she stormed out and had to sleep on a makeshift bed in the basement of the said hotel since she left her purse back, when storming out…
    Catherine really does have a good head on her shoulders. She has this incredibly sweet side, but she doesn´t let her guard down easily. She is also pretty hilarious, in a sarcastic-one-liners way, which sometimes leads people to believe that she is being either bitchy, petty or shallow despite her rarely intending it to be spiteful or mean. She is a fun, smart, straight-laced girl, who is always there for her loved ones. She did most definitely not have any ulterior motives going into this and I sincerely hope, her and Sean can make this work;)
    Ps. I am new around here, so…. Hey people!;)

  2. Oh, and LOVE LOVE the three days in a row columns…….was about to have some SERIOUS withdrawals.

  3. Steve – you never disappoint “I think there’s nothing wrong with self-love. A lot of it. Like, every day. Just don’t over do it. You could go blind.” had me laughing so hard – I shouldn’t be reading this during office hours.

    To concerned friend- sound like you had a great bf that told you and showed you how much he cared but when you keep asking someone to continue to “prove it” for no reason, it not only gets old, but shows how insecure you are. If you are acting like this now, what happens when you’re married? Will you freak out over him talking to or working with any attractive women? Self confidence and high self esteem is attractive; insecurity and jealousy is not. That being said, I hope he takes you back (really decent men are hard to find – just read the other Dr. RS letters) and that you get over your insecurity issues.

  4. Hey Chloe….welcome!

    Thanks for the great week of spoilers and other entertainment, Steve!

    I haven’t watched The Bach yet and hope to get to it this evening. But, I sure have found the time to read RS, and probably wouldn’t even watch it anymore without the enhancement of RS and his spoilers.

    Hear that, ABC!

  5. Hi Chloe.

    I’m wondering if you are a friend of Catherine’s? You listed so many qualities she has in a way that makes it seem like you really know her vs just watching little recorded scripted snippets…? Are you and she connected in some way? If not, it sure seems like you’re reading a lot into these things something it’s tempting to do, but not very realistic…

  6. A Bachelor/Bachelor Pad alum is going to be a guest on a podcast I am associated with.

    Suggestions for any good questions to ask?

  7. @reece81- i would want to know what their biggest gain was from doing the show, and what they feel was their greatest loss from doing it, as well..

  8. About the Catherine piece: you do realize that many women “smile” when talking about something extremely embarrassing? Her eyes weren’t sure where to go while telling it, that seemed like a tell to me. I could be wrong, but I read her face as saying, “I still can’t believe anyone would do that on a first date.”

  9. @dewatchesreality- i got the same impression from her watching that piece, too.. i know when i get embarrassed, i tend to smile, as well..

    @chloe- btw, welcome! seems like youre definitely a catherine fan.. im liking her too so far ; ) i like that she isnt trying too hard to be either of the extremes, and she seems nice but a little sassy (not in a malicious way).. so far, so good..

  10. @Athena
    I am indeed personally acquainted with Catherine to some degree, otherwise it would have been quite far-fetched, no?:)
    Really, I am not here to spoil, heck I know nothing spoiler-worthy;), I just get the feeling that, while Steve seems to be infatuated with Lindsay, he bears a dislike towards Catherine and he somewhat tries to influence his readers to feel the same way….
    (She was obviously embarrassed by the end of the video and was cringing while smiling yet Steve tries to interpret something into it..)(or passively calling her shallow in his last post…etc.)
    @kasey31 she´s def. got some spunk;)

  11. If you go to a hotel with a man for your first date you should expect your relationship will be based on sex. Not respect… sex toys or no sex toys. Not sure why she was so surprised.

  12. Maybe it´s me but since when is “getaway” a codeword for having crazy-monkey-sex for a longer period of time?…
    I mean if you go away to somewhere, you´ll have to eventually find a place to sleep(ie. hotel)…

  13. @tamara, she was probably young and naive? it happens.. i don’t blame her. she probably didnt think she was going to get taken advantage of like that because of how “gentlemanly” he was. i’m sure she has learned a lesson after that though.

  14. @chloe- well im happy to hear that.. as a few may remember, she was a very early favorite of mine.. it was something about her picture.. glad to hear shes with sean, and i wish them all the best!

  15. @Chloe, welcome!!

    @mella, well said! And who are we to judge Catherine for doing that? God knows I had my fair share of naive and dumb decisions back in my 20′s. You live and you learn.

  16. I finally watched it Friday night and have to say my first impression of Catherine is pretty positive. She’s adorable and I look forward to seeing how the season plays out. I love knowing the outcome.

    As far as people making mistakes in their 20′s, I certainly had my fair share. If you ask my family, their were a lot! But as iheart said, you live, learn and apply the learnings to other situations throughout life.

  17. @Karyn, glad you got to watch it! I love knowing the outcome too, and it will be fun to watch and see how it all happens. (or I should say what the producers manipulate and splice together for us haha)

    *Revenge*
    10:30 (PST) the next day and not one Revenge comment yet? I’ll start. I loved last night’s episode. Super awkward moment when Emily got to Daniel’s office and she was just going in for a friendly hug and he tried to make out with her. And (spoiler) I was finally right about something! (Padma) I knew she wasn’t one of the good ones. I just hope Nolan figures it out sooner rather than later.

  18. very true, iheart and karynr..definitely not here to judge.. this is rs, not church.. u do live and learn..

    **revenge**
    i thought last nights episode was one of the best so far this season.. i was sad to see padma betray nolan! i liked her, but as the episode went on, i knew marcus was the trustworthy one and not padma.. i also liked the little show-down with emily, nolan, and aiden in an attempt to make hellen trust aiden.. i thought the ending of that scene was a little weird though.. “youre welcome for saving your life, hellen?”

  19. **revenge**
    ps.. also, creepy hellen “good evening, daniel.. i hope im not interrupting anything” even though im watching u eat chinese food on the couch with your ex finace..

  20. *Revenge*
    kasey, I got a kick out of that scene with Helen watching them too. I was thinking that I wish I had been watching Revenge on as big of a flat screen as hers. :)

    Honestly, so far this season I have been a little disappointed with Revenge, compared to season one. I read somewhere that Mike Kelley is aware that a lot of the show’s viewers aren’t happy right now with the stretchy storylines and he promises we’ll see how everything ties together by the end of the season. I’m optimistic that it will keep getting better. We’re only a few episodes away from the sinking of The Amanda.

  21. **revenge**
    @iheart- i heard the same thing.. it looks like theyre already starting to piece together some unanswered questions and filling in some gaps concerning the initiative.. its starting to make more sense now.. it was getting too confusing, so i was glad to hear that hes taking action on the feedback from the viewers..

  22. I was going to back 2 posts and comment on Revenge but I noticed you all carried it forward so here goes:
    **Revenge**
    Nolanism from last week, “a fake up”?
    Aidan’s buying everything Helen (The Initiative) is selling. Anyone else buying it? Think they really do have his sister?
    Poor Daniel, what a sucker, he falls quickly and hard. Am I the only one that thinks a “Wine Auction” isn’t really compatible with a “children’s charity”? I don’t know, maybe it’s just me. Clever fauxEm, picking up the extension and listening in on Daniel and Helen’s convo.
    I wish I had a bag to match every single outfit….

    Enter fauxAmanda, don’t cross that one, who DIDN’T see this coming? Of COURSE she’s going to go after the Ryans….duh. NEVER mess with her family. Declan definitely doesn’t have the same finesse that fauxAmanda has, he’s a bull in a china shop.

    I LOVE that Nolan was playing Tetris when Daniel confronted him. I LOVE Tetris :D . Padma’s back….who’s buying what she’s selling, beside Nolan of course? Hard to determine who’s the bigger threat, Marco or Padma…and who’s pocket who is in. Must have been the “Night of Returns”….enter Ashley. She’s been “privy to all manner of chicanery ….”, no threat intended, of course.
    I liked Vicky’s dress at the auction, it was WAY nicer than the strange thing fauxEm was wearing in the last episode, the one with the metal bar thingy across the front. “Oh hell make it half a mil, I don’t even drink wine” this weeks Nolanism. I was curious to see how Nolan’s tapping into the hotel system was going to aid them, sure enough, party’s over and the master manipulator starts playing with his new toy…ok so I get the “set up” BUT at the beginning of the episode they show the abductor’s wrist with an “Infinity” tattoo on it, right? So does fauxEm have one? She was the abductor that went down but they didn’t show her wrist the second time around. Anyone? And of course, who’s pocket is sweet Padma in….no big surprise there.

  23. Hi everyone – ok, so I’m not someone who would normally make comments about someone with a physical disability. It’s just that the Bachelor editing department really wants me to care that Sarah only has one arm. So for those of you who haven’t watched this episode yet…just wait for this gem, “my ability to love someone is not affected by the amount of hands I have”. I nearly spit my diet coke at the TV. Really???? I mean, it’s awesome that she’s comfortable enough with herself to be on this show. But who says that? I wonder what question a producer had to ask to get this response?

  24. @jill- THANK you for saying what most have us might have felt uncomfortable bringing up.. i think she seems sweet, but she mentioned not having an arm 3 times in 3 minutes.. i give her props for putting herself out there and doing this show, but when she said “my ability to love someone is not affected by the amount of fingers i have” i almost thought it was a joke.. what in the world? i mean, i get that having one arm is obviously going to be part of her storyline, but it seems that abc was a little distasteful with her edit.. sorry if i offended anyone, that was just how i felt watching it..

    @randais- great recap.. i also found it hilarious that nolan was playing tetris.. i used to love that game!

  25. @jil and kasey – GIRLS! My daughter and were “watching” last night (kind of, it was on while we were talking) and made the EXACT SAME comments regarding Sarah. I can not imagine how these producers manage to get these, probably normal girls under ANY other condition, to act so ABnormally and ridiculous on this show. She seemed like such a genuinely “real” girl until the scripted date where ALL the emphasis is placed on her missing arm. I actually felt bad that she was put in that role, I doubt she’s that obsessed about her missing limb in real life.
    And Kasey, great minds ;) .

  26. I really want to like Sarah but I find her kind of whiney. Not regarding her arm but her voice kind of grates on me. JMO. Find it interesting how little screen time Catherine has gotten so far.

  27. To Heartbroken Idiot: I agree with Dr Steve’s analysis but would also add:

    Is this guy an engineer or a person working in a technical field? Most those guys are introverts whne it comes to matters of they hear (ie they analyze the relationship internally – in their own head). They go through a logical process in their head much like they do on their job and they tend to follow logic more than their emotions. So even if he is deeply in love with you, he may have come to the logical conclusion that “this relationship” is heading in a direction that just “doesn’t compute” with long term happiness and stability. Most engineering types deal with technical “problems” all day long, and they usually don’t like to come home to more “problems”.

  28. To “Still Actively Dating”:

    It sounds to me that the military dude in school is already worried about “other guys”. I think it’s safe to say that in the past 5 years he wasn’t dating anyone while he was in the military. But it sounds like you “were actively dating”. The guy might feel that you’re “a player” and doesn’t want to “get played”. If you really like this guy then confront him with a letter or an email and tell him how you feel and that you’re willing to “stop actively dating” (ie stop game playing) and find out if there’s anything possible between the two of you.

    I’ll bet the guy has been keeping tabs on your “active dating” and that is why he brought a “date” to the NYE party, to show you that he can “actively date” too.

    Obviously there’s sexual tension there. If you want to find out if there’s more, you’re going to have to make a “serious” first move.

    Otherwise, Dr. Steve’s advice is SPOT ON.

  29. @randais- exactly.i highly doubt in a normal first date experience, she would be placing this much emphasis on her arm.. shes a beautiful girl, absolutely gorgeous and has such a great personality, so that overrides everything.. there was no need for the producer manipulation, but why would we expect any differently? abc really has no shame..

  30. @Kasey – distasteful is the right way to put it. I sincerely laughed out loud when she said that. It’s not funny that she has one arm, it’s really not. It’s just the way that it is edited makes it ridiculous. Like randais said, I’m sure that she doesn’t sit around obsessing over it in real life. And when I saw that she had only 1 arm/hand, my first thought was not, “wow, that must really affect her ability to love someone!”. Of course not. It’s just distasteful, like you said.

  31. I dated a guy that was born with only one arm. I didn’t think any less of him and it was not a big deal in our relationship. It would have bothered me if he had talked about it. He let me ask questions or talk about it when I wanted to, but he didn’t bring it up.

    I have to believe ABC is making Sara focus on it more than she would on her own.

  32. **BIGGEST LOSER**
    I think it’s so funny how Jillian finds her “chill” AFTER her team gets decimated. Down to 2 contestants and NOW she get’s all complimentary and encouraging. Does she ever wonder if she’d adopt that attitude to begin with, would she have 3 contestants instead of 2? I mean, one did leave, maybe if Jillian had been less screamin’ mimi perhaps that one would have been more inclined to stay…She needs to take a Dolvett pill every morning :D .

    This franchise is being so clever with the way they are incorporating these kids into the episodes. I’m really appreciating this aspect of the show.

    Here’s what I couldn’t figure out though, so the whole blue team was relegated to the “junk” room for 4 1/2 hours a day…why couldn’t they come up with work out options? I mean there were table and chairs in there, a hockey table. walls…..this team decided to sleep for 4 1/2 hours? Not very imaginative of them. And then along comes Bob, why didn’t these people come up with this idea day one?

    One thing I will never understand about this show, why do they make the women stand there on Weigh In day in their sports bras while the guys get to keep on t-shirts? It seems so demeaning. Having said that, LOVED when Pam the Whiner turned into Pam the Winner! Interesting change in game this season, no more voting table. This season each team member gets to enter a voting booth and vote off a team member. For all the good that did, because right after the vote they show everyone who voted for who. Cate got voted off but with Jackson having the lowest weight loss for the last 2 weeks, I don’t get it but there you go.

    And now, I will shift over to RS’s next post since I see he has a new one :) .

  33. @addicted and jill- i agree 100%
    and jill, jimmy kimmel always has the f4 right, always! idk if it has anything to do with being on the same network, or u could be right.. maybe he does read steves blog!

  34. Don’t ANY of you GET IT? Catherine was only preselected so the show can reach out to its expanding Asian American female (East asian, as in Filipino, Chinese, Korean, etc.) audience. This is the large demographic group that is with white men, or prefer white men. More of those viewers = more $$$ for the show. Let me guess, one of the final dates will also be in an East Asian country?

  35. Never been a fan of “The Big Chill” and it’s because I don’t understand how a circle of “friends” live intertwined relationships of sex and love and friendship. I gues I am just way too black or white and have very little room for gray in my relationships. Back when I got married, I wouldn’t have tolerated my wife maintaining “friendships” with ex-lovers and I’m certain she wouldn’t have tolerated me doing so either. I think there’s potential conflict when an ex isn’t EX enough.

  36. I don’t find the Catherine and Sean relationship to be sincere or true love at all. I only think its preselected to get more $$ for the show, because they can reach out to a more diverse audience. AKA a bigger audience and more advertisements and sponsorships to keep a show that fails at it goals running.

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