Reality Steve

The Bachelor 17 - Sean

The Bachelor Sean Recap & Clarifications on Tierra News

-It’s group date time. I can’t remember the last time this show had canoes on it…oh wait, it did last night. Canoeing is the new rappelling apparently. 7 girls, 3 canoes, 3 girls to a canoe, so Lesley gets in with Sean. I guess this was her way of telling him, “That’s right big boy. Let the other women fend for themselves. I’m here to do dirty things with you in a boat that none of them will see. Except Tierra. I’m sure she’s implanted a spy cam somewhere on here.” Even Selma wasn’t too thrilled that Lesley got to ride with Sean alone. She wished that a shark would eat their boat, then giggled, then her face went paralyzed for five seconds. I guess that’s what happens when you have some work done to it. It can freeze up like it did last night. That was really bizarre. Kinda creepy too. It was like she turned into a zombie momentarily. Or Taran Killam playing one of the Merryville Brothers:

-So after canoeing across Lake Louise, Sean has more plans. “So the girls think the days over, but it’s not.” Yeah, I would hope not. That’d be the worst group date ever if it was. Did they really think it was over? I mean, canoeing across the lake they thought was the whole date? I would’ve asked for a refund if that happened. Sean informs the ladies of even better news – the Lake Louise Polar Bear Plunge! Something I’m guessing every single one of the chicks had zero interest in doing. You think at this point any of them were like, “Uhhhhh, I thought I came on this show to, you know, like, travel where the sun is? What’s up with these dates in the North Pole? This blows.” I’d say at this point, all 7 girls were more excited about the free gift bag they get at the beginning of the season then jumping into barely-above-freezing water in their bikinis. Talk all you want about how it’s a once-in-a-lifetime experience, but no thanks. Gimmie a massage at the Bellagio and a cabana at the Venetian pool. Call me a p***y all you want. You have fun watching your nuts shrivel up to the size of bird seed while I’m out here enjoying the sun.

-So I guess this is some sort of tradition up there that happens on New Year’s Day which proves them to be even bigger freaks than I already thought they were. You are supposed to submerge your whole body underwater and jump right in. AshLee is highly debating whether she wants to do this. No such confusion for Selma. Her high maintenance ass is like, “Thanks but no thanks. I’ll sit this one out. You b**ches get frost bite while I apply more foundation and lip gloss to my already cryogenically frozen face.” Of course, she has to make sure it’s ok with Sean first. “Are you gonna be mad at me?” “No, of course not.” Translation: You just sealed your fate woman. I understand why this part of the date was added, and it’s obvious Sean was turned off completely by Selma’s lack of involvement, but man, I’m with Selma on this one. If I have to jump in near freezing temperatures to show that I like a guy who isn’t my type anyway, no thanks. I’ve already got Arie on my jockstrap when I get home. Like I need this. Peace out, ladies. I’ll be over here in this tent where it’s 3 degrees warmer because I have clothing on.

-AshLee is still kinda freaking out about doing the dip in freezing cold water, but since she’s on a reality show, and I guess she thinks no guy will ever like her again if she doesn’t do this, she decides why not? “No one’s ever in my life made me ever want to do something for them.” Ummmm, AshLee you were married for 18 months back when you were 17. You never wanted to do anything for your husband? Ever? Might wanna take that one back or else, well, I guess we know now why you got divorced. AshLee seems to be the only one really freaking out about it of all the women that are gonna make the jump. Hell, Daniella practically wants to do it naked. “Sean is hot, I’m hot, lets just jump in and get cold and hot together.” I have no idea what that means or what you were implying Ke$ha, but what the hell? You’re probably sloshed beyond recognition now anyway, so just make sure you don’t drown. The one thing I was afraid of most for Daniella was her arising from that water only to find that all of her blonde highlights were now killing all the fish in Lake Louise.

-So you put women in bikinis, tell them to submerge their whole bodies under water in barely-above-freezing temperatures, and people are surprised at what happened? I understand paramedics were on the spot in case of an emergency, but why would anyone be surprised that someone caught hypothermia? Or did she? Look, even when I was watching last night I was saying, “Well, she couldn’t possibly be faking that could she?” But then you read both Sean’s blog and Chris Harrison’s interview today and BOTH of them are questioning her. I mean, Chris does bring up a good point. Every other girl jumped in for two seconds, then the next day everyone in production did the same plunge, and ALL of them were fine. The ONE person who had the bad reaction was the one girl who we know craves attention from Sean and it’s worked for her every time. Do I think she was incredibly cold? Yes. Do I think she was on the verge of possibly getting hypothermia? Probably. But was she at the point at that moment where her life was in danger? I don’t think so. All the girls were shaking and freezing. Tierra was just shaking a liiiiiitle bit more than everyone else. When people who are there are calling her out for over dramatizing it, and knowing she’s cried wolf numerous times already this season, that’s when you lose the benefit of the doubt. When she got back to the hotel room did she milk it for attention? Of course. That’s what she does. All these other munchkins barely cracking the 100 lb mark are jumping and skipping around like they just got out of the jacuzzi, yet, the most curvy one there is on the brink of hypothermia? Hmmmmmm…

-So Tierra looks like Daniella after one of her crying hot mess benders: total wreck, shaking uncontrollably, and mascara running down her face. To say that wasn’t her best look of the season is quite the understatement, and that’s saying a lot considering this is the same girl that wears basketball rims as earrings every episode. As emergency teams are rushing to get Tierra warm and to the hospital, Catherine and Desiree can see from their balcony that something is up. Desiree is mortified it could be one of her girls that she actually likes who’s been injured: “Oh my God. I’m like freaking out. Who is that?” No worries Des, it’s just Tierra. When they finally got her inside to the hotel, the editing team is the one that planted the notion that Tierra was faking it. Catherine says, “She was disheveled…I’ve never seen anyone look like that…she was in such a horrible state…I wonder about the other girls.” And not three seconds later, the other six come bouncing in all giggly talking about what a great time it was, which was nothing more than a subtle jab at Tierra for being overly dramatic. Nice touch. Look, I’m not defending Tierra, but that was clear as day that it was the show driving you to think that Tierra was faking it.

-Then of course, immediately we’re treated to ITM’s of both Lindsay and AshLee saying they are doubting Tierra. Basically no one there believes her, and they were the ones that were actually dealing with her on a daily basis, so why should any of us? Sean comes back to the hotel and immediately heads to her room and other than saying she couldn’t feel her toes, she looked fine. And then of course lays the “This guy better marry me” line to everyone, and immediately everyone is back to questioning her antics. See, when you cry wolf as many times as Tierra has this season, you’ve given everyone watching at home absolutely every reason to doubt your sincerity in anything you say and do. So I hope Tierra realizes that her past behavior this season is what’s causing people to question her current behavior. She’s an overly dramatic person who craves attention, will do whatever she wants to make the focus on her, and that’s her style. Which is fine. But when 8 million people watch you every week, do you really think that’s gonna go over well? It never has in this franchise and never will. And my guess is she’ll go on the defensive at the “Women Tell All” and it’ll get even worse before it gets better. Lost cause. She brought it upon herself. She made her own bed, now lie in it.

-At the cocktail party, this became yet another sh**show since Tierra wasn’t originally supposed to be there. But hey guess what? That didn’t last long. AshLee: “Since Tierra is gone, it’s guaranteed no drama.” Kiss of death, AshLee. Maybe you should’ve just gone George Costanza at that point and just said the opposite of what you wanted to happen because thinking that Tierra wasn’t going to make some sort of appearance was just plain stupid. Lesley pulls Sean aside first at the cocktail party and has something she wants to make sure he knows: “My feelings for you are very real, and very intense, and it’s so cheesy, but I love ‘love.'” I’d say that was very open and honest of Lesley to share that with Sean, and so late in the game, words that definitely he probably took to heart. Well, at least I thought he did until he responded to her. Know what he said? “I just want you to know, I appreciate you so much.” Oooooooh, ouch. Not the kinda response you want when you’re one week away from hometown dates. She mentions the word loves, and he “appreciates” her. Maybe she didn’t see it coming, and she was fooled by the group date rose she ended up receiving, but oh boy, not good.

-Sarah gets Sean alone and decides that since she knows they’re so close to hometown dates, why not get the ball rolling and miraculously whip up some pictures from home to show Sean. Pictures of herself, her dad, her baby sister, her with a prosthetic arm as a child, her favorite Cabbage Patch doll. Sean’s response? “This was a reality check for me.” Translation: Oh crap. We’re close to hometowns, she just showed me picture of her family, and frankly, I have no interest in meeting them. I need to pull the rip cord on this one fast before the sh** hits the fan. Hmmmm, what do I do? Do I let her stick around for 2 more days, enjoy time with her friends, and just not give her a rose at the rose ceremony, or, single her out in front of all her friends, call her out of the room, make her do the walk of shame back in there to tell them she’s eliminated, and then send her home? Yeah, I’d much rather make it more embarrassing for her by calling her out in front of everyone else. Sean can talk all he wants about having too much respect to not give her a rose at the rose ceremony, but that makes no sense. Then why not just never have rose ceremonies and send girls home beforehand? If anything, rose ceremonies are the more dignified way to leave and less embarrassing. “Go walk back into that room already a hot mess, pack your stuff in front of all of them, then walk out so I can send you home because, you know, I have too much respect for you.” Uhhhh, ok.

-Back at the hotel, we see Tierra getting ready by taking a perfume shower. I’ve always been fascinated by the way women put on perfume. Some do a quick spray on each wrist (never really understood that one), some do a couple dabs on their neck, some do one spray into the air then walk through it like it’s magic fairy dust, or there’s what Tierra did which was spray it all over herself like she was me in high school dousing myself in Drakkar Noir. I bet she was wearing Sex Panther. 60% of the time it works all the time. For a woman who apparently just suffered from hypothermia hours ago, doesn’t look like she’s dressed any extra warmer than the other women who didn’t suffer from it. But hey, what do I know? I mean, at this point, we’ve all gotta take Tierra at her word, right? As she surprises the women that night by walking in late to the group date, needless to say, the claws come out, and the doubts begin again. Lesley: “She is a professional at getting attention…everybody watch your back, we have a Tierra-ist on our hands.” Good one. So lets see now, not one girl has come to her defense or seemed to be friends with her on the show, you’ve got the show’s producers and Sean live tweeting on Monday nights taking shots at her, and today both Chris Harrison and Sean are doubting her sincerity in their blogs. Yet, there are still a selected few out there that want us to believe she’s the victim? If it walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it’s a Tierra.

-But Sean greets Tierra with open arms at the after party and puts her on the spot. “If we were to fall in love here, do you want a proposal out of this?” A yes or no answer would’ve been fine, but since Tierra has zero interest in actually getting engaged out of this and is pretty much strictly on this show to “win” and gain attention, she gave some long convoluted answer, that, I think was a yes? I couldn’t really tell. Whatever it was, I’m sure it revolved around “winning” and not necessarily being engaged to Sean in particular. So since we’ve been inundated with Tierra for the last 30 minutes or so, time to lighten the mood and bring in Lindsay. She may not be everyone’s cup of tea, plenty of you like her and plenty of you dislike her based on your responses, but I think her time with Sean that night is the reason why I like her the best this season. Sure she’s goofy and giggly a lot (then again Catherine is just as giggly), but I’d much rather take that than someone who’s stiff as a board and serious 99% of the time like an AshLee. Hey, I’m sure AshLee’s a great girl, just not for me. I think we’ll see she’s gonna end up being a little too intense for Sean. I’m guessing there’s a reason he took the two goofy, giggly fun girls to the end, because that’s what he wants. I see Lindsay in the exact same mold as Ashley Hebert. Tiny, spunky, animated, and seems like someone they’d have fun with as the lead. Then again, the only girl who’s finished as the final 2 that ended up as the lead was Trista 8 seasons and 10 years ago. Calendar-wise, it’s kinda tough to pull off considering they could never announce Lindsay before March 11th since she’s in the final episode. Filming begins shortly thereafter. Definitely possible, but it’s just something we’ve never seen yet when making the “Bachelorette” announcement. Guess there’s a first for everything.

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  1. Dianne

    February 7, 2013 at 5:50 AM

    For all of those that are blaming Sean for the way Sarah was eliminated, think about it for a minute. Sean had absolutely NO SAY on how Sarah was sent packing. It’s 100% the producers who stage this kind of thing, and always have. They played the poor girl up for everyone to feel sorry for her because of her missing limb. That got old and boring, so off she went. Same deal goes for Tierra..her antics are now so predictable, and the producers figure her 15 minutes are up, so bye, bye, Tierra.

  2. cheryl1

    February 7, 2013 at 6:10 AM

    I’m sure SR doesn’t consider Canadians freaks…unless he means freakishly nice, freakishly good looking 🙂 In those cases, he’s right. Moving on…I actually feel uncomfortable watching Ashlee’s scenes. She has some serious issues…which given her history makes perfect sense, but hashing them out on The Bachelor? Bad choice. Oh, I do tire of Lindsay. She’s a teacher? Yikes! She hasn’t said one interesting thing or had one interesting moment on the show. If she is The Bachelorette I’m not watching. Des on the other hand is great…very likeable. Yep, poor Lesley. That was a terrible break up….awful to watch. I kind of understand why he did it that way. It was likely bothering him. He wanted to get it over with, and not sit through an awkward per-rose ceremony conversation. But still – awful. And, pease, please could they show us a little more of Catherine!

  3. Dianne

    February 7, 2013 at 6:31 AM

    @peepsforpeace – Selma, is that you??!!

  4. randais

    February 7, 2013 at 7:28 AM

    Dianne – bwahahahhaah I almost fell off the bed with that last comment! Good one.

    Peeps and anyone else defending Ms. Selma via “do you know the back story” – Really? A back story to why/where/when she took off her top for a video, could excuse it or change the fact that she STILL appears hypocritical? I will never understand that rationale. I don’t know her or what’s in her heart and don’t begin to suggest that I do, BUT I DO know how she “appears” based on what she has done and has been put out there for EVERYone to see. That’s the ONLY thing we have to go off of. It’s not rocket science, it’s common sense. I’m not suggesting she’s not a “nice” person, I think many hypocrites can be very nice people, or has a “good” heart. I just think the term hypocrite, in this instance, means she is sending two different messages, that’s all.

    Having said all that and slightly changing the subject, I would have NEVER jumped into that freezing water either no matter if it sent me home or not. In my opinion, if it DID send me home, that would tell me, without question, he was NOT the man for me.

  5. megbird711

    February 7, 2013 at 8:01 AM

    I’m a girl, and I really like Lindsay. Not huge on Des, she seems boring. *Shrug*. Now, when I say “like”, I mean like for a lead. I didn’t want Sean for a lead, and lo and behold, this is the most bored I have ever been watching this franchise. Thank God for some of the girls I like (Lesley and Lindsay are my faves). I think Lindsay would be funny and entertaining, two things Sean and Emily were NOT.

    As for the ring thing, I think that it’s sloppy editing, but I think it was filmed when they said it was.

    And cheryl, did you mean Poor Sarah? Lesley is still on the show! And I thought it was rude what Sean did too.

  6. megbird711

    February 7, 2013 at 8:08 AM

    And Dianne, all we are told this season is how everything is Sean’s choice. If he can give roses out to whoever the hell he feels like on the first night, you honestly think he can’t refuse to embarrass Sarah? Of course he could’ve. He just is dumb enough to think he was doing the respectful thing. He embarrassed both Sarah and Kacie, and his muscles-for-brain is too slow to realize it.

  7. addicted2rs

    February 7, 2013 at 8:13 AM

    Daniella didn’t get a 1-1 date because Sean already knew he was going to send her home. But he was going to let her wait until the rose ceremony. It is really cruel the way he eliminated Sarah. I wouldn’t put it past the producers forcing it, but I also wouldn’t put it past Sean either.

    When I saw the ring on Catherine’s wedding finger I thought it might be a family heirloom because it seemed to have a wedding ring attached to the engagement ring. It didn’t look impressive enough to be a ring from the show though.

    I noticed Des packed the exact same red and black suitcase that Sarah did. Must have been given to every girl who made it that far.

    One last thought… I think Sean and Catherine would make a good couple now that we’ve gotten to see a few minutes of them together. He doesn’t seem to want a serious person. Kind of surprised he doesn’t eliminate AshLee sooner.

  8. jillbeau

    February 7, 2013 at 8:17 AM

    I will miss Selma for her snarky comments. She had a gem during the cocktail party that I haven’t seen mentioned in any blogs. Talking to Lesley and Des about Tierra: “Let’s be honest. You’re going to WIFE that?!??”. Sure it was mean, but it made me laugh. There’s a deleted scene that Steve may post in today’s column that pretty much shows why Sean eliminated her. But for some unknown reason, the producers decided not to include it in the show. Who knows anymore.

  9. Dianne

    February 7, 2013 at 9:22 AM

    Megabird, honey, you just keep on thinking the way you’re thinking. But, you have to realize, Sean is paid to be there, and is under contract to be there, and that leads me to belive that he has to do what he’s told to do, not vice-versa. But hey, that’s only my opinion.

  10. randais

    February 7, 2013 at 9:34 AM

    I can’t help but think of one more thing, after reading everyone bashing everyone on the show (and me too), but it seems to me, this ALWAYS happens. No matter who the bach/ette is, since we’ve ALL met whoever it is previously, they ALWAYS appear to morph when taken out of a competitive role and placed in a control role. EVERY single one of them. I have been disappointed in the lead, going from one role to the other, EVERY SINGLE SEASON. They turn into clueless, thinking with their crotch, hypocritical idiots. So why are we surprised? I’m not, it’s the same thing every season, time for us to just accept it and carry on.

  11. jensmith05

    February 7, 2013 at 9:37 AM

    Hey, Steve, big fan. Women put perfume on their wrists and their necks because they are “pulse points” where your blood vessels are closest to the skin, thus the hottest (temperature) areas. Because these areas are warm, the smell reignites when activity happens. Also, my mom said you should always wear perfume a little higher on your neck, so when a man kisses it, it smells wonderful, but doesn’t taste like rubbing alcohol. Love the column.

  12. cheryl1

    February 7, 2013 at 12:35 PM

    @megabird, you’re right. I get the names mixed up.

  13. LynnMJ

    February 7, 2013 at 4:28 PM

    Dianne – I feel the same. Producers want/need for certain things to happen. There is no way they’re going to send the resident b#tch home when she’s the person everyone talks, writes, blogs about. Is it a coincidence that Sean, just like many bachelors before him, keeps an obviously obnoxious personality around, even after being told straight out by other women that he needs to know the truth? The drama queen makes the show….without one of those, it’d be boring.

  14. mariet

    February 7, 2013 at 5:10 PM

    cheryl1– Yes, you get the names mixed up. Like when you said, Lindsay. She’s a teacher? Yikes! I’m sure you meant, Ashley Hebert. She’s a dentist? Yikes!

  15. peepsforpeace

    February 8, 2013 at 9:30 AM

    @Athena – thank you! And yes, great point about people changing, etc. I mean, these women are still so young! I agree the topless video of Selma was a bit strange but we really don’t know the backstory behind it and whether it was even released, etc. Just have a bit of a beef with people writing posts authoritatively about others cultures when they obviously don’t understand just how complex culture is.

  16. reddla

    February 8, 2013 at 10:38 AM

    Of course this show is produced but I an hardly believe you would put merit in anything that Doug character had to say. It’s called saving face.

  17. Athena

    February 8, 2013 at 12:54 PM

    @jillbeau about Selma: you’re right, that was a “good” snarky comment she made during the cocktail party, and thanks for the video clip. I don’t know why they didn’t show it either. Granted, she wasn’t very smooth when she called the other girls “idiots” for taking the plunge by not realizing that Sean was one of the “idiots” too. But, I thought what was most telling is how put upon he seemed by her comment. It’s ok for him to expect all of the girls to do his (producers) bidding, but not ok for Selma to say “no thank you”. Seemed arrogant to me. Guess it’s good she went home – it was definitely not going to be a match made in heaven for those two.

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