So we are roughly two weeks away from the “Bachelor” wrapping up filming. In my last post about the show, I told you who the final four were, when their hometowns were taking place, and that the final four rose ceremony was this past Wednesday night in Miami. All the hometowns went as planned, the rose ceremony was at the Loews Hotel in Miami, and there were pics from Nikki and Andi’s hometown. Well, I can share with you now that during Renee’s hometown this past Tuesday, they went to the beach together, and also attended her 8 year old son Ben’s little league baseball game. Juan Pablo met Ben afterwards as the three of them walked around while cameras rolled. Awwwwww, how cute. Now there’s a guy who’s taking his role as the “Bachelor” seriously and getting to know everything about each woman.
Psssshhhhh. Yeah right. Juan Pablo dumped Renee at Wednesday’s rose ceremony, thus leaving Nikki, Andi, and Clare as the final three women. For the first time ever, the “Bachelor” is repeating a final location and they are headed to St. Lucia for the overnights and final rose ceremony. If you remember, they went there for the ending of Jake’s season. Here’s the way I look at it: Better to dump Renee after meeting her kid then to dump her next week after having sex with her on the overnights.
-So now Kim is saying the selfie she took in baby North’s onesie was her “middle finger to the world.” Yeah, cuz nothing will stop the trolls more than admitting you were giving them a giant “F You.” I think the Kardashian clan might be the stupidest people on earth.
-Looks like Jon & Kate Gosselin are doing great nowadays handling their parenting duties. Such grounded, normal, down-to-earth people who have really done a bang up job raising their kids to one day be productive members of society. I’m just curious if there’s any office pools I can get in on on which daughter ends up on the pole first.
-Lammy and Khloe are now trying to patch things up. Fine. Hey, I’m all for second chances Khloe. Just know from here on out, whatever happens in your relationship and how it will get dissected daily in the tabloids is on you. No more complaining. You’re bringing this on yourself. All the signs are there, but because of your brand and your TV show, you’re continuing this farce of a marriage. Don’t say I, and the rest of the world, didn’t warn you.
-David Arquette fell off the wagon – again. For a guy who’s been divorced a few years, this guy seems to ALWAYS talk about Courtney. I understand she’s the mother of his child, but still. It’s in a more creepy, stalkerish, why-won’t-she-be-with-me vibe, no?
-Not sure which is more embarrassing: the fact that Adrian Grenier likes frou frou drinks, or that he’s giving speaking engagements to college students who are ignoring him. Washington University in St. Louis, whichever frat house leader at your school booked Adrian Grenier to be a keynote speaker for anything other than how to troll for underage skirt should have their charter revoked.
-Apparently everybody from Laguna Beach is either married or getting knocked up. I like to consider myself a somewhat expert on Laguna Beach having seen all the episodes back in the day. With that said…who the hell is Christina? Am I just drawing a complete blank not remembering this girl? Obviously she wasn’t one of the main characters, but I can’t even place this girl on the show. Crap. Old age.
-Bahahahahahahahahahahaha did you see Kelly Ripa’s Halloween costume?!!! So funny!!! I mean, who in a million years would ever think to dress as Miley & Robin from the VMA’s? I mean, the originality is off the charts. I don’t know how the audience made it out of there with their intestines still in place. Side splitting humor I tell ya’.
-Yeah, I’m sure Kaley Cuoco hasn’t been unbearable to deal with with her upcoming wedding. Sounds like her fiance is taking the right approach with someone who’s been obsessed with getting married since she was 2. Superman dodged a bullet with this one. Get it? Dodged a bullet. Superman. It’s hilarious. Laugh.
-Only took her about five years, but Heidi Montag is now regretting getting size F breasts. So basically everything that everyone was saying about her back then is turning out to be right and she’s admitting she was an idiot for doing that. Basically the exact same thing Miley will be saying five years from now when she admits all the things she was doing to get attention were pointless and didn’t need to be done.
-Speaking of breasts, if there’s one performer in Hollywood who never minds showing off the good, it’s Nicki Minaj. And you wonder why someone like this wasn’t brought back to judge a family show that is “American Idol?” Well, besides the fact she was the worst judge in the history of the show.
-Lady Gaga and the little midget from the “Hunger Games” movies are going to be hosting SNL this month. Obviously both are getting the gig to promote their album and movie respectively, but outside of Kevin Hart, has there ever been a male host as short as Josh Hutcherson? After what Miley did to disrespect the little ones in her VMA performance, kudos to SNL for giving one of their leaders a chance to host. Bravo.
-Gwenyth Paltrow is getting out in front of the expose that’s coming out on her by basically saying she doesn’t give a sh** to what strangers think about her. At least she’s taking the right approach. Gwenyth and I are like kindred spirits, since I deal with this as well, just on a much, much, smaller scale. People wanna hate, people want to be jealous, let them. I don’t care what people I don’t know, never will know, and never want to know think of me. What’s the point? They’re opinion of me doesn’t matter in the least bit. I long ago realized that putting myself out there publicly like I do is gonna bring about haters. Let them hate. They are worthless to me. Fight on, Gwenyth.
-Look, I understand Heidi Klum likes to get creative every year for Halloween and I appreciate that. Especially when she dresses up as something slutty. But last night? This is completely unacceptable. Heidi, no one wants to see you look like this. Because you have access to a full makeup department that can do this to you, doesn’t mean it’s a good idea. You really started earning points when dropped Seal like a bad habit. Don’t go around in horrible costumes now to lose back those points. I mean, you’re climbing the charts in my book of points and that should be important to you.
-Some company thought it would be a brilliant idea to have a Ryan Seacrest inflatable sex doll. Ummm, whoever thought of this should be fired immediately. I mean, are there that many women in America that were clamoring for a sex doll of Ryno? Please tell me this is some prank or something. I’m sure it’s flattering to him on some level, except when he realizes it’ll be bought mostly by men.
-Photoshopping is the greatest, isn’t it?
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