Ice-mageddon 2013 is almost over. We’re finally back to temperatures above freezing, so all the ice around my house is starting to melt. Yesterday I did something I’d never done before in my life – shoveled ice off my driveway. I’ve never had to because it’s never been this bad before, but yesterday I decided to put on my big boy underwear and do some manly, brawny housework. After 30 minutes, I finished half the driveway as you see, and I gave up. Figured I’d just finish the rest today since it’s warmer and will be a little easier to scrape everything off this morning. Man, I had no idea shoveling ice would be so damn taxing. That was not fun at all. At least if it was snow, I’d just drive over it and none of this would be an issue. But we never had any snow all weekend, just ice everywhere that basically made the roads unbearable since that happens about once every three years out here. Thank god that’s over. I can finally leave the house and do something productive with my day other than catching up on DVR’d shows and screwing around on the internet.
And of course, be sure to check out this season’s episode-by-episode spoilers.
-50 Shades of Grey has begun filming and, clutch the pearls, the first pic of Christian and Anastasia has been released! Do menopausal women start having heat flashes now? How does this work? I’m sorry to all those that are infatuated with this book trilogy, but there’s probably a good chance the movie version is going to suck to high heaven. You’ve been warned.
-I’m glad at least Katy Perry isn’t shy about her divorce from Skeletor. Seems like some magazine pins her down once a month to let us know what happened. The latest has her saying she basically drank and ate cheetos are getting divorced over a text message. Classy Russell. An even better story would be for Katy to dive deep into how someone like her could ever even look twice at a twiggy, malnourished, bug eyed, unfunny Brit with a sex addiction. These are the things we want to know. Ok, just me.
-Ben Affleck tells Playboy Magazine that a stalker masquerading as a member of the paparazzi had threatened to kill his wife and kids once, even showing up at the kids school one day. No bueno. Obviously celebrities sign up for certain things by being in the position they’re in, but none should have to do deal with that. The best part of that article is Ben admitting they were offered millions to sell pictures of their kids when they were born and they turned it down. Imagine that. Someone actually not selling their kids pics to a tabloid. I wonder if Melissa Rycroft read that. Or any other celebs for that matter. I don’t know, Melissa just came to my head first. Not sure why.
-After denying it for months on end that they were dating, Brant Daugherty and Peta Murgatroyd were seen making out at an event recently. Unfortunately no pictures to back this up, but I mean, would any of us really be surprised if it’s true? I sure wouldn’t. Not sure they’ll be able to hide it too much longer, especially since Peta will be at Sean’s & Catherine’s wedding. I’m guessing if she brings Brant as her date, there’s a good chance they’re doing the horizontal mambo on a nightly basis.
-Not sure why anyone would pay attention to anything that comes flying out of Tila Tequila’s mouth, but apparently she thinks Paul Walker’s death was some sort of ritual, and she let it be known on her Facebook account. Great. When I want to hear conspiracy death theories, I tell ya’, I’m always running to Tila Tequila first to see what she has to say because, you know, she has the mental capacity of a squirrel.
-Madonna’s daughter Lourdes played the role of Rizzo in her high school performance of “Grease” over the weekend. Rizzo, the one who thought she got knocked up Kenicke. I’d say that’s an appropriate role for the daughter of Madonna. And holy spitting image Batman! Could Lourdes look any more like a young Madonna? Yikes.
-For some reason, former SNL cast member and “Ladies Man” star Tim Meadows is upset he didn’t get asked to participate in the Bill Brasky skit this past weekend, since he used to be a fixture in it back in the day. Geez, talk about sour grapes. Let me help you out here Tim. I think you might be the only person who watched that skit Saturday night and thought to themselves, “Awwww man, so great to have Bill Brasky back in our lives, even if it’s just for one night. But you know what it’s missing? Tim Meadows.”
-So not only did Harry Styles and Kendall Jenner knock it out at the Gansevoort all weekend, he apparently took her to a gay bar on Friday night because, well, he’s Harry Styles and he can do whatever the hell he wants. And apparently he is. Good man, Harry. Good man.
-Honestly, I really don’t care what Ace Young & Diana DeGarmo’s holiday plans are. I just saw this story and something immediately jumped out at me so I figured I’d link to it. What’s with these two’s eyebrows? Holy excitement! This isn’t the first time I’ve noticed it with these two. I think they both have a good three inches between the top of their eyes and their eyebrows. Looks kinda creepy.
-Courteney Cox is now seeing some dude 12 years younger than her because that’s what the cougars in Hollywood like to do now. I have no idea who Johnny McDaid is other than to read he’s in the group Snow Patrol and she took him to Jennifer Aniston’s party this past weekend. Hey, anything’s better than David Arquette, right?
-Due to the success of the “Sound of Music Live,” NBC has already ordered a different musical to air the same time next year and are looking to make it a holiday tradition. This was a no brainer. Hollywood is all about what draws, and when you do something that draws 18 million viewers for a one time event, you bet your ass they’re gonna duplicate it. Don’t think other networks aren’t going to join in and this will be the new craze come holiday season. Why wouldn’t you? I maybe saw five minutes of the “Sound of Music Live” so I have no idea if it was any good, but I know that Thursday show pulled the biggest Thursday night numbers in 5 years for the network so that’s all that matters. They could’ve run a high school production of “Annie” and if it drew 18 million, they’d do it again next year.
-Blake Lively has exited CAA (Creative Artists Agency) and is looking for new representation. Her husband Ryan Reynolds is repped by WME (William Morris Endeavor) so I’m guessing she’ll end up there. But none of that is important. You know what is? The fact that the guy who played Rusty Griswold in “European Vacation” is Blake Lively’s half brother. And not only that, he’s the real brother of the girl who played Daniel’s “lady friend” in “Karate Kid 3.” I gotta imagine I’m the only one on this planet who finds this the least bit fascinating and I’m fine with that. I even texted my best friend last night when I found this out, that’s how invested I was in this news. His response was pretty much what I expected: “WTF?”
-As much as a “Friday Night Lights” fan as most of you know I am, I’m very happy that they’ve decided against making a movie. The show ended about as perfect as you can end a show, and as much as I’d like to see the band back together again, for a 2 hour movie where it’d taint the ending of the show, I just was never on board with it. Now, if they wanna bring everyone back and re-start the show with a season 6, I’m all in. But that’ll never happen, so I’m good with the five seasons they gave us of the best network drama in the last 15 years.
-Barron Hilton says his face is permanently damaged now after getting his ass kicked in Miami this past weekend. Sorry about your face, dude. Whatever. What’s more important is that in that picture, Barron is wearing my alma mater’s hooded sweatshirt. I had one of those back in college. Did I tell you that Alicia Silverstone took a class right next to mine after lunch on Tuesday’s and Thursday’s? I used to arrive early just so I could see her waiting. Then again, so did everyone else. I’m sure she wasn’t creeped out in the least bit.
-A while back I linked to a story about a prank caller who would record phone calls he made to NBA, college, and NFL coaches pretending to be another team gauging that coaches interest in joining them. Well, that dude got arrested yesterday since you can’t record phone calls in California without the other party knowing. Hope that was worth it.
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