-Juan Pablo doesn’t like saying goodbye to Camila. He tells her he’ll be seeing her on the computer and talking to her on the phone while he’s gone. A nice way to start the episode to remind everyone that yes, he has a daughter. And yes, he cares about her. And yes, he voluntarily has decided to leave her twice to go on a reality show. But he’s all about setting a good example for her. Well, then I suggest she doesn’t watch this episode whatsoever considering the mixed signals he sends for two hours straight will probably make her head spin. By the way, now we know why Juan Pablo didn’t tell the girls at the end of the cocktail party last week that they were headed overseas. That’s a job for Chris Harrison! I mean, he’s gotta earn his 60k an episode paycheck somehow, so might as well bring him in the beginning to tell the girls they have one hour to pack because they are headed to beautiful Seoul, South Korea. It was at this moment that I felt what it would’ve been like to be in Oprah’s audience when she gave her audience a bunch of free sh**. The piercing screams, the jumping around, the hugs, the make outs…ok, maybe not any make outs…but man, these women were giddy.
-We get the camera phone footage of the girls on the plane and in the airport in LA and landing in South Korea. It’s a nice touch they’ve added in the past few seasons. Although they never really show all that much other than the truckloads of luggage these women bring. Like they’re all Princess Vespa from “SpaceBalls” or something. The girls are walking the streets of Seoul, arms clasped, like they’re about to be robbed. Once they get to the hotel, the date card says, “Pop.” Elise, Nikki, Cassandra, Kat, Chelsie, and Danielle are on the date. Nikki is not thrilled because, well, she doesn’t like interacting with other females. “This blows. I have to share this date with 5 other girls who are quite annoying.” Ahhhh, yes. Let that bitchy side out Nikki. In real time, they were roughly 10 days into filming, and already Nikki thinks everyone is annoying. Cassandra is unsure what that date card could mean. “Pop? Maybe we’re making popcorn.” Yes, they flew you half way across the world so you could make popcorn. Unless this date was going to include the ol’ hole-in-the-bottom-of-the-popcorn-bucket trick, then it was most likely not going to involve anything having to do with popcorn. I mean, before you left, Chris Harrison did tell you girls Seoul was the capital of Kpop. Cassandra must’ve been asleep. Or trying to watch a Pistons game illegally in the house.
-Juan Pablo: “I love dancing. If a girl knows how to dance, it’s the best way to win my heart.” Lets face it, Juan Pablo was a walking contradiction this whole episode. My gosh, did he not watch Kat warming up? As I said after the first episode, more of Kat dancing is a good thing. I thoroughly enjoyed that. She’s been dancing since she was a little kid and made the Phoenix Suns dance team right before going on the show. I’m guessing she’s got a few moves. But Juan Pablo’s head was so far up his ass all episode, apparently he didn’t notice. He’d rather spend his time with a negative sap like Nikki who will suck the life right out of a room. Nikki was not too thrilled with Kat being a better dancer than her. Translation: Nikki was jealous she wasn’t the top dog on this group date and would be outshined. Nikki: “If there is a sign that says ‘I’m the best at this,’ I’m sure Kat would be wearing that right now.” Hmmmm, sounds like someone is extremely insecure. Debbie Downer looks at Nikki and thinks, “Man, lighten up.” Speaking of Debbie Downer, outside of her Harry Potter skit, was there ever a better SNL skit with Lindsay Lohan than the one at Disney World with Debbie Downer? I think not. I hate that it got taken off YouTube due to copyright laws.
-So the six girls and Juan Pablo get to perform on stage with the popular Kpop group 2NE1, who according to Nikki, has “77 million views on YouTube.” Wow, that’s a lot. You know how many “Gangnam Style” has? 1.8 BILLION views. 2NE1 is basically Psy’s bitch. I’m sorry, but I will never get tired of this song, nor one of the most bizarre videos that makes no sense whatsoever:
I mean, c’mon. How much better would this date have been with the girls up there with Psy? Probably the greatest date ever. I would’ve much rather preferred these girls getting to dance with Psy just so I could see how much more miserable Nikki could get up on stage. It was quite the sight. I don’t know this for a fact, but when 2NE1 took the stage and were chanting, “Nega Che Chala Ga,” I believe that translates to “Get the hell off the stage Nikki.” Yes, I know I spelled that wrong, no need to correct me. I don’t speak Korean, nor do I care to know the correct spelling of whatever the hell they were repeating over and over again at the beginning of the song, or what it means. I’m pretty sure that was the correct translation though. Question: Who hated Nikki more, the girls or 2NE1? Close call. Just watching everyone up there dancing the whole song, it was pretty comical to see the lack of rhythm Juan Pablo had. So were the DWTS pros watching that episode last night drawing straws to see who didn’t have to be Juan Pablo’s partner this season? Just curious.
-At the after party, we finally learned a little more about Kat. She says she feels like she hasn’t gotten a chance to talk to him much. As she starts telling him a story, the cameras show us clips of the little ball of hate Nikki saying how much she thinks Kat mugs for the camera. “Kat is on ALL the time. There’s no way that’s real.” Maybe, maybe not. However, I do know one thing that is real. That giant zit on Nikki’s face that she claimed last night on Twitter was because of stress from the group date. Excuses excuses. Damn that thing was scaring me. I thought at some point it was gonna grow it’s own head and start talking more sh** about the other girls. Crazy. Anyway, Kat begins to tell Juan Pablo that her dad was an alcoholic, he divorced her mother when she was six years old, he’s had 7 DUI’s in his life, and basically wasn’t much of a father at all. Which in return, has made her vulnerable and she isn’t the greatest at opening up and that’s a fear of hers. Of course, she now has to ask Juan Pablo his fear (I believe that’s 3 episodes in a row now) and he says “Not being a great example for Camila.” The same answer he said last week. I think maybe they should just tell all these girls to ask him that every week and see if he’s bright enough to ever change his answer. My guess? No.
-So on this group date after party, three different girls make it known that Nikki is the most negative person in the house. Elise, Danielle, and Chelsie. And considering Nikki talked sh** at Kat’s expense, I’m guessing Kat wasn’t too fond of Nikki. And this was BEFORE Nikki got her second consecutive group date. Nikki goes to talk to Juan Pablo, tells him how difficult this has been for her, hates group dates, blah blah blah. She ends up getting the rose. Look, it’s not like what Nikki said this episode hasn’t been said on EVERY season since this show started. We get it. You want time alone. You don’t want group dates. I’m sure others feel the same way. However, none of them acted like a giant b***h the whole day, which was apparently that she did. None of the girls on that date said anything nice about her and it had nothing to do with her getting the rose. They weren’t voiceovers, they weren’t spliced together ITM’s, nor were they made up. Clear shots of women saying the words that Nikki is the most negative person in the house. Hey, I told you that months ago that she wasn’t liked. Now it looks like they’re starting to show it.