The Bachelorette 10 - Andi

What Happens in the First Episode & What I Think of Andi’s Guys Bios

Always one of my favorite times of the season – the release of the head shots and bios. Seems to me they’re letting them dress more casual as the seasons go along. But the stiff poses and the awkward stances still kill me every time. One of these seasons they should do the pictures outside and have girls leaning up against a tree, or guys sitting douche-style on a motorcycle or something. We’ll get to the bios on page 2, but first, I was able to watch the first episode online yesterday. It’s released to the media, and yeah, I’m technically not supposed to be watching and spoiling it, but hey, it’s what I do. I’m not considered part of mainstream media anyway so I’ll do what I want. Also, after releasing the spoilers yesterday, a few of you emailed asking when I’m going to release this information that I tweeted about on Sunday night. I can tell you now I will post that on Monday. I know you’re curious as to what it is or what it’s about. All I can say is you’re not gonna want to miss it. Something I’ve never gotten before and it will definitely be interesting for anyone who frequents this website. Stay tuned. It’s a good one.

Watched the first episode yesterday, so wanted to summarize for you what you’re going to see (this has been added to the episode-by-episode spoilers for Episode 1):

-Before the episode started, we see Chris Harrison appear in front of the mansion and give about a :45 second tribute to Eric Hill. They show pictures from his past, he says kind words about him, then says the season will be dedicated to him.

-From there, typical start to a season. Video clips of Andi (mostly re-used the ones they showed from when they announced her as the Bachelorette back on Juan Pablo’s ATFR) walking through the park, talking to her parents, then showing up in LA, driving down PCH with the top down, hair blowing in the wind, getting excited for her journey, and moving in to her place. Basically the same exact thing they’ve done for the previous 27 seasons and will continue to do every season from here on out.

-The day of the rose ceremony, Andi’s sister comes to her place and gives her a pep talk and to see the dress she’s gonna wear. Sister bonding talk, they cry, sister leaves. Although it is interesting to note they showed this, and I’ll explain why later.

-Because this season’s premiere is only 90 minutes, they decided to cut out the guys intro videos. So we don’t see any of those before Andi arrives at the mansion. They just get straight to her showing up, greeting Chris, then the limo entrances begin. However, I guarantee the guys intro videos will be released on ABC’s website after the first episode airs. No way they filmed 10-15 of those with no plans on showing any of them anywhere. They’ll pop up online I’m sure.

-As for the limo entrances, these are always shown out of order in the way they were actually shot. But here’s the order of what is shown on camera: Marcus, Chris, JJ, Marquel, Tasos, Cody, Steven, Rudie, Carl, Jason, Nick V., Dylan, Pat, Emil, Brett, Craig, Ron, Bradley, Josh B., Nick S., Brian, Andrew, Mike, Eric, Josh M.

-You know how in one of the previews for this season, they show Craig getting out of the limo having trouble popping the cork off the champagne bottle? Yeah, doesn’t happen. All we see is Craig get out and successfully pop the champagne bottle then walk over to Andi.

-Dr. Jason has the worst limo entrance because of the stupid joke he tells. “I think you have a fever. Cuz you’re lookin’ pretty hot.” Barf.

-Emil tells her he pronounces his name “AYE-mel. Like, ‘anal’ with an ‘m.’ Great first impression.

-Cody’s ego is on full display in his entrance from pushing the limo up the driveway, to the popped collar, to telling her he’s a personal trainer. Yeah, I think we could probably make that out.

-Tasos brings a lock because he’s a fan of Lover’s Bridge in Paris and they go put the lock on one of the gates at the mansion then throw the key in the fountain. Clever, but ultimately means nothing.

-JJ uses a phrase that I don’t think we’ve yet to hear on this show: “Love quest.” Sounds like a movie on at 2:30 in the morning on Skinemax.

-During the cocktail party, the guys who get longer 1-on-1’s that we see are Josh (the first one), Marquel, Eric, Tasos, Nick V., Chris, & Marcus. The ones where we get shorter clips of their 1-on-1 time are Brian, Cody, Emil, Steven, Josh B., and Nick S.

-I gotta admit, it does feel a little weird watching Eric. We’ve just never had anything like this happen before so it’s just weird watching her interact with someone who’s no longer here. But they definitely spent time showing Andi & Eric’s time together. Very positive, told her all about Global Odyssey and what he does.

-As for Josh, they sure don’t hide Andi’s attraction to him. Andi: “Josh M. is my type. Nailed it. Pegged it. Damn.” Josh tells her that he just moved to Atlanta in January. So for all the conspiracy theorists, the guy was only in her area for 2 months before he left to do this show. They did not know each other beforehand. Womp Wooooooooomp.

-In the middle of the cocktail party, they immediately cut to Chris Bukowski hanging out in the tent outside with production saying he wants in. The thing is so staged and so stupid, I can’t believe they’re trying to sell it is he just showed up unbeknownst to everyone there. Even Chris says “I’ve been out here 7 days on my own just waiting.” Sure you haven’t.

-In her time with Nick, he talks about his family and that he’s the second oldest of 11 kids. I guess this was a big deal to Andi and what led to her giving him the first impression rose later. Then again, before giving him the rose, Andi is saying in an ITM, “If you’d have asked me at the beginning of the night who my first impression rose would’ve been, it would’ve been to someone I was straight up attracted to. But I had a great first impression of someone I would not typically go for.” Translation: I’m not attracted to Nick, but I gave him the rose anyway. Compare that to her initial reaction to Josh and, well, you get the idea.

-So basically the Chris Bukowski thing plays out like this: During the middle of the cocktail party you hear sound of production people asking for someone to come out to the driveway, there’s Chris waiting, they go to commercial break, later on they go back to it, Chris is sitting there telling production he wants to be on the show and wants to at least see Andi to tell her himself, production tells him they’ll get Chris Harrison, he comes out, Chris tells Chris he wants to be on the show, Chris Harrison goes back in and tells Andi Chris Bukowski came on his own, he’s wants to meet her, and what does she want to do. Andi tells him that she doesn’t think it’d be fair to the other guys who she’s already met, so tell him no. Chris Harrison goes back out and tells Chris Andi said no, Chris begs, but eventually just gives up and leaves. It’s the only drama of the first episode. And fake drama at that since Chris production was well aware he was coming. Chris Harrison had to tell Andi Chris Bukowski was on Emily’s season and Bachelor Pad. I don’t know if Andi even knew who he was. If she did, an acknowledgment she knew who he was was never shown.

-Andrew and Pat realize they have stuff in common and end up having a bromance. Which makes sense now since they were hanging out together with Lucy last week that she posted a video of on Twitter.

-Andi says “Marcus is hot” at least 4 times during the episode, so, now we can see why he made it to final 4 before being let go. Strictly physical chemistry.

-Typical first episode stuff except the only drama occurred between a guy who never even made it on the show. No drunk guys doing anything stupid, no guys talking sh*t about another guy, and no one making a complete fool of themselves. Well, except Chris Bukowski.

-Andi’s dad’s appearance at the cocktail party talking to the guys was never shown. Not the first time I tell you something about this season that didn’t make air, and I’m sure it won’t be the last. Not sure if it was cut for time or what, but no idea why they showed her talking to her sister, but cut out Hy meeting the guys. Seems to me that would’ve been more interesting than girl talk about her journey and what dress she was gonna wear. But Hy was definitely there that night, it’s just not shown for some reason.

-The rose ceremony is left out of the episode for the media because they don’t want anyone spoiling it, but as we all know, the 6 guys who get booted are Josh Bauer, Dr. Jason Leep, Rudie Dane, Mike Campanelli, Steven Woolworth, and Emil Schaffroth.

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14 Comments

14 Comments

  1. angelfish

    May 14, 2014 at 11:45 AM

    Aw, I’m bummed that we don’t get to see Hy making his evaluations at the cocktail party. I was looking forward to that, and Bukowski. At least Bukowski will provide some manufactured man-pain to laugh at!

  2. erin4

    May 14, 2014 at 2:22 PM

    grown-ass-man Bukowski. has he not humiliated himself enough, yet?

  3. angelfish

    May 14, 2014 at 2:45 PM

    Obviously not. He’s got to polish up those acting chops for Bachelor in Paradise!

    I think it would have been SO hilarious to show Hy strolling amongst the guys. And NOT telling them who he was. Just say “Andi likes older guys, so we decided to raise the age limit”.

    Didn’t Sean have some chick bring her grandma to the first cocktail party of his season?

  4. marybods

    May 14, 2014 at 11:31 PM

    What does womp wooooooomp mean?

    OMG that would of been so freakin funny to see Hy saying he was there to represent her interest in older guys….to funny

  5. rob22

    May 15, 2014 at 12:47 PM

    So, Josh Murray is a former baseball player? aka unemployed. So, the idea that he’s looking for love, and not fame and goodies, is looking even less likely. But at least the two of them can go out int the country and mow down some varmints. So, they’ve got that going for them. That should be more than enough for them to justify a few donkey punches in the honeymoon suite. And well, IDK, maybe they’ll both be into the cash and prizes enough to say “I do” on national TV. It could happen.

  6. momma3j

    May 15, 2014 at 3:26 PM

    LMAO @ “Goalie McGoalerstein”.

  7. ugagirl93

    May 15, 2014 at 8:07 PM

    Josh M isn’t unemployed – he works in finance but I’m sure they figured (former) pro baseball player sounded more fun. totally does make him sound unemployed though, wtg abc!

  8. ugagirl93

    May 15, 2014 at 8:08 PM

    & Steve yeah he did move to Atlanta in January – he lived in Athens prior to that, about 1.5hrs and a world away from ATL.

  9. sunday

    May 16, 2014 at 7:34 AM

    In reference to Emil’s romantic card he once gave to a girlfriend, I understood him to mean that he gave his “every day for 3 months” list all in one card – He didn’t send her a card every day for 3 months. That’s how I took it.
    I’m sure most of the bizarre answers these guys give on their questionnaires are bogus anyway. The only thing the majority of them worry about is for the casting director to notice them so that they make it onto the show.

  10. rob22

    May 16, 2014 at 10:22 AM

    I was thinking about the logical choices that Andi and Josh could make. What is the most logical decision to make? Break up and face media ridicule? People and Us Weekly articles about how you cheated on one another, TMZ video of the aftermath of a domestic disturbance, he said/she said dualing interviews on E? Or, get married on national TV to a swooning audience, receive a very nice pay day and an automatic paid invite to every future Bachelor event. Maybe the recent trend towards more actual weddings is just people figuring out how to cash in and avoid negative press.

  11. karynr

    May 17, 2014 at 1:52 PM

    I was really looking forward to seeing Hy at the first cocktail part. Bummer!

    I was also bummed when I read I won’t see Mr. Grown Ass be humiliated on national tv once again. Though, I have no doubt there won’t be a long wait before he does it a couple dozen times on the new and improved Bachelor Trash this summer.

  12. bachfan00

    May 18, 2014 at 1:36 PM

    Marybods: woomp woomp is a sound effect used on old tv shows and cartoons when something bad or sad happened. They used it a lot on Charlie Brown. It’s basically just a sarcastic way to say too bad so sad.

  13. rbmom123

    May 18, 2014 at 4:24 PM

    Dude, you’re hilarious. I was literately laughing out loud at your bio comments, esp. Ron and Josh M. Can’t wait for the show to start to hear you make fun of it!

  14. rbmom123

    May 18, 2014 at 4:26 PM

    Oh, and I agree with “sunday”, I think it was a single card with all the sentences from the past few months. Still kinda of odd though.

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