“Reader Emails,” “Dr. Reality Steve,” & Live Video Chat Tonight at 9:00pm EST/6:00pm PST

Steve,

Thanks for what you do. I will be forever embarrassed that I fell for the Jef Holm act with Emily. I am sorry for not trusting your truth about him.

I think it is interesting to remember Nick’s airplane video and then to see Nick through his multiple ITMs (in comparison in number only to Michelle Money’s ITMs) and the way he is so over-confident with the guys. It kind of explains how oblivious he was to the other passengers who have read your column and recalled that was a soon-to-be famous skirt chaser.

Also, I am bothered by all of the scarves on the guys this season. I am a musician and observe what straight and gay guys wear daily. Not one straight guy wears neck wraps like these guys; did the producers offer dozens for them and beg them to wear them?

That is all.

Comment: Every season when the initial crop of contestants move into the mansion, they are given a gift bag loaded with free clothes, accessories, etc. It’s why on the “Bachelor,” you’ll see a lot of the girls in the same type of tanks and yoga pants waiting for date cards. And on Des’ season when they went to Germany, I remember every guy essentially had on the same jacket. Those are the free things given to them they are pretty much told to wear. I’m guessing the scarves this year were part of their bag. No way they just happened to cast a bunch of dudes that all like wearing scarves.
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Hi Steve,

Thank you for your column. It really is amazing work that you do. I enjoy reading your columns and notice all your effort and dedication that you put into what you do, and definitely wanted to acknowledge that before writing my comment.

Had a few comments I wanted to throw out there as well:

Honestly, even if there were never any spoilers about this show, it’s kind of obvious to me that Andi would not pick Nick because he’d never let her control him, and that wouldn’t work for her in the long run. She may have been super attracted to him for various reasons, but I think she’s very smart and she knows that the strong attraction is not enough for them to ever make it in the long run. I know that many couples don’t make it anyway after they leave the show, but I think Andi knows that she is attracted to Josh for deeper reasons, and knows that she’s attracted to Nick for more superficial reasons….like kind of the fact that he’s a challenge, he doesn’t give in to her every request as enthusiastically as others, and because he shows a “take charge” attitude over the other guys when he wants to spend time with her (that is attractive at first but gets old after a while).

Anyhow, I like both Josh and Nick, and am happy for Josh and Andi at the moment, however, I hope he knows how to hold his ground because Andi certainly doesn’t give anybody a break. Nick would be able to handle standing up to her, but she certainly would not like that come later on when the honeymoon stage is over, hehe. Honestly Nick reminds me of a leprechaun with that grin, and Josh reminds me of the typical jock. He seems super good hearted though, and congrats to them, for now.

Thanks for reading my comments. I’m interested to see if you agree or disagree with certain points I’ve made. Do you think I’m on the right track?

Comment: I know that Andi picked Josh over Nick in the end, he proposed to her, and they are engaged. Trying to dissect how she feels about each one is an effort in futility. Nor do I really care. I just don’t know enough about these people to know exactly what they’re like.
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So, is there a major AshLee meltdown after Graham breaks up with her? Please tell me there is. And wow, Robert dumping Sarah AFTER the fantasy suite? That’s way harsh

Comment: I have no idea if AshLee melts down.

I corrected myself in the live chat last week, and it’s since been changed in the spoilers. Sarah actually broke up with Robert after the fantasy suite date.
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Hey Steve,

Long time reader, love the site. Couple of questions:

1. Do you know what AshLee’s reaction to Graham not wanting to continue their relationship was? I feel it will be worse than her reaction to Sean not choosing her. No. Man, a loooooooot of people seem to be rooting for an AshLee meltdown.

2. Did they get Michelle Kujawa to come back and film them “finding her” the morning after it actually happened? Why would she do that for them? No. The scene we see in the previews is Chris confronting her in the hotel the next day. She hadn’t left the island yet.

3. Who do you think is the most bat sh*t crazy person they have ever had on the show? Tierra.
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Hi Steve, I love your blog and im a fan from Brazil.

I have a question about Michelle Money and Graham on Bachelor in Paradise, which im not sure if you already answered or not. If yes, sorry!

So Graham was announced in the cast pretty early on and Michelle only came into the show later. Was that just to create drama between him and AshLee? Did it ACTUALLY cause any drama? Because i remember they were a couple on and for a little bit after Bachelor Pad and i really liked them together. I think they broke up because of the distance or something. Anyway, do these feelings come back on BIP at all? I know she’s with Cody now, but maybe before that she was after Graham or something…

Thanks for reading and i would appreciate if you answered!

Comment: Michelle came on in Day 2 of filming. She was always gonna be on the show. Not sure why they waited 2 days to put her on.

No, Michelle and Graham are just friends. They didn’t hook up on BIP. Graham was with AshLee the whole time until they broke up, and Michelle ends up with Cody in the end after a brief flirtation with Marquel. And I think Robert too before he moved on to Sarah.
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Do you think having a high profile/salary/responsibility career is an advantage for a Bachelorette contestant, over the guys in sales, marketing, sports, etc? Does the lead find out the general occupations of the contestants beforehand, or is up to them to tell her? The lead knows very little, if nothing, about the contestants before the show. However, the last few seasons I’ve revealed contestants that were gonna be on before they left for filming, and I’m sure they all took a peek.

I assume contestant occupations can influence the producer’s choice of the next Bachelor, so I understand the show-runners choosing a wealthy, land owning Midwest farmer (Chris) over a salesman from Las Vegas (Marquel).

Marquel was handsome date bait, but Chris seems more marriage material. And I agree that Chris was targeted as MLB (Most Likely Bachelor) from the moment he got through the audition process.

But if Andi had disliked Chris from the beginning, do you think she would have been contractually obligated to drag him along for the ride at the producer’s insistance, or do you think the producers would have let her send him home, and targeted the next MLB on their list?

Thanks for doing what you do.

Comment: Plenty of leads have brought contestants along over the years who either A) they didn’t want to keep around or B) the contestant wanted to leave sooner but were convinced to stay. I think they knew when they cast Chris he was definitely “Bachelor” material if he wasn’t chosen in the end.
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RS,

I don’t think you could ever be more wrong about a season. Andi is in love with Nick! You can see it all over her face when she’s with him. The video you have is Nick acting. I don’t believe someone just happened to be sitting behind Nick and recorded that video. Not possible. That was all done by production. You’ve been foiled again!

Comment: Here’s the thing: it doesn’t matter if you believe that happened or not. It did. Accept it.
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Hey Steve,

Here is Ben’s season: http://www.free-tv-video-online.me/internet/the_bachelor/season_16.html. One of your reader e-mails today was asking for it.

Comment: I haven’t checked the link but if they say so….
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Hi Steve,

Why doesn’t ABC want to televise Desiree and Chris’ wedding?

Comment: I don’t know. I’m just hearing they’re not going to.
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Just got done reading your episode by episode spoilers for “BIP”. I just don’t understand how this show is going to be on mainstream television. The majority of the cast is either outdated (Graham) or people that barely had any screen time their season (Jackie, Lacy). I can’t imagine people actually caring what happens to these people or their lives. I feel like a better show would simply getting the “popular” Bachelor family their own reality show that is much more laid back. Just basically show their reunions, club events, charity events. There is so much that happens in this incestuous pool they call the Bachelor family, that I think many people are interested in. For example Courtney’s book is such a hit with the fan base, not because she gave top secret behind the scene info, but because she simply wrote about her time with Ben, Arie, Jef, and other bachelor contestants. Imagine if all of that was taped for reality tv like the Hills or something. Way better than this game show/trying to find love/engagement thing they have going on with Bachelor Pad and Bachelor in Paradise.

Comment: It is going to be on mainstream television. For 7 weeks. Learn to love it.
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RS,

Why do you think ABC picked that Nick vs Josh scene to release as a deleted scene? To fuel more drama? Do you think the Murray bros have seen this? Andi? think that scene alone can’t be called edited or scripted or can it? It really shows the cocky and douchey side, I can’t think its a joke or what. Is this still part of what others are calling Michelle a money edit? They should have it out at the ATFR considering Brian was there and still calls Nick his BFF.

Comment: I guess just to show more of his arrogance and why during filming, he was the guy that the others had the most issue with.
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I was reading your column and couldn’t picture what Lacy looked like so I googled here and found this, which I’m assuming is from Juan Pablo’s season. As you can see, her favorite snacks are Cheetos…

Lacy

Comment: Nick will have to try someone else. Lacy is engaged to Marcus.
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Hi Steve,

Just wanted to clear something up about the languages people speak in Belgium.

There are 3 official languages: French, Dutch and German.

Flemisch is actually a Dutch dialect.

People from the Netherlands en form the northern part of Belgium speak the same language: Dutch, but completely different dialects.

We understand each other perfectly (most of the time), but when people from other countries hear us speak, they think we are speaking totally different languages.

In Brussels, everyone speaks both French and Dutch (Flemisch). The northern part of Belgium is called afther Homer Simpson’s favourite neighbour: Flanders :-)

I didn’t see the episode they shot in my country, but I hope you don’t all think we only eat waffles all day and live in monasteries!

P.S. Sorry for kicking your ass in the World Cup

Comment: You don’t need to apologize to me. I’m not the head coach or anything. Sure, I wanted the US to win, but I was over it about .4 seconds after the game was over. I hope when Argentina beat you guys, you didn’t go drown your sorrows in a waffle. It’s ok. It’s only soccer.
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I know you’re a fan of JLH and wonder if you have an opinion about her role as a BAU agent on Criminal Minds. I love that show and did watch her on Ghost Whisperer and Party of Five. She’s a decent actress but I’m not sure she’ll hold up against the other cast members. It’s always tough being new, but others have done it successfully.

Will you be watching? Will she be successful?

Thanks for video blog last night. Glad you turned on the fan as I got hot just watching you sweat.

Comment: I don’t watch “Criminal Minds.” You know what’s funny? For how much I’ve talked about JLH over the years, there’s really only one TV show of hers that I consistently watched, and that was “Party of Five.” Which is where my crush began. I’ve seen some of her movies, but never watched an episode of “Ghost Whisperer” and saw one episode of “Client List,” where she had the worst Texas accent I’ve ever heard. And I live here.
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Steve,

This is my first year reading your blog. After Juan Poopy’s season ended, I couldn’t believe Nikki was still defending him and parading all over as his girlfriend. She can’t possibly be that naive and dumb. Anyhow, this is how I came about paying attention and discovering your sight. Loved learning about the next Bachelorette and the hot guys that it is now JP and N who the heck cares and she wants to milk the fame. Now for my questions, I have a few.

1) Have you heard anything more about Ron Worrel’s departure? I am not sure I am buying the death of a friend. Fishy. Maybe he was not comfortable on the show, and clearly that was apparent with his disdain at the cameras following him out to the parking lot to try to have a private phone conversation which by the way, if production already knew the reason for that call, I think I answered my own question. I don’t blame him.. Does he have twitter? he appears off the radar, where as the others, especially even drunken Craig is well loved and often mentioned on twitter. IG photos of him and Nick Stutter hanging out like long lost buddies.. Ron is oddly missing from this tight knit group and I liked the guy. I don’t know anything more than what they showed. He left because a friend died. I have no idea who. Probably a good idea that he went off the radar after the show. That means he’s not turning in to one of “them.”

2) Someone mentioned the franchise doesn’t necessarily pick the next Bachelor that will be well liked by all, yet Chris Soules, I can’t think of anyone that has said a negative thing about him. He has shown an integrity that is believable along with a really fun and playful attitude so he isn’t boring. I think that is what we all want to see next season, the epitome gentleman. Anything polar opposite of JP. Agree? Whether that’s what everyone wants to see or not, that’s what they’re going to get. Been saying that for two months.

3) Why were there hometown spoiler photos for Nick, Marcus and Jocky Josh, but none for Chris? I really though it was surely the production staff members that were leaking to you…Because that’s what was emailed to me. Some seasons I have zero photos from hometown dates. Some seasons I have one. Some seasons I have two. Some seasons (like this one), I have three. I don’t have any control over it.

Thanks for all the juice and laughs.
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RS:

1. Why don’t any of the contestants say no when they are interrupted at a cocktail party with, “Can I interrupt or steal….” They always complain about it later especially if the person interrupting has a rose. Why can’t they say the obvious, “I see you have a rose, so I would like to continue my conversation.” Or if the interrupter does not have a rose, “I would like to finish this conversation” and throw the question back at them and say “Can you give me a moment?” Or is that against the rules? You can be just as polite declining an interruption as you are asking if you can interrupt. Because if you don’t play along with what they say, there’s a good chance you’re going home. Those interruptions are all planned, and they just go with it.

2. Have we ever seen a make out session between a white lead and black contestant? Not that I can remember.

3. For some reason, this season looks the most contrived. Let’s think back, even before Reality Steve, (yes, there as a time, everybody breathe…) when they were better at trying to get us to believe it was real and not producer manipulated. Now, more than any other season, it is so obvious that it is manipulated and it is like they are embracing the absurdity/cheesiness and rolling with it because the ratings don’t lie. I think they broke that infamous “fourth wall” with allowing all those direct looks into the camera that I have seen Nick do this season and the cherry on top was the scene with Nick at the hotel desk. It’s like they know it’s all a joke, don’t care, they still have enough viewers drinking the kool-aid. Pretty much. They know the die hard crazy fans will watch every season even though it’s the same exact thing over and over. Hence the reason the show has been on the air for over 10 years and 28 seasons.

4. Thanks for the Courtney Robertson book mention….and posting readers’ recommendations and reactions. You were right, no Shakespearean masterpiece and it wasn’t meant to be; it was just GREAT dirt. Fast read, could not put down, done in a few hours and I wanted more. Even though she owned up to being a bitch does not make it okay to be one, but I give her credit for not whining about it and moving on, and LEARNING from it. Props to whoever stylized the writing because they did not waste time on boring set-ups, they cut right to the chase on everything, kept it simple and damn, Ben was a tool! Wow. Just wow.

Comment: Good stuff. Glad you liked it.
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Steve,

You said something along the lines of: the show makes the lead feed the runner up, in this case Nick, things to make it look like they are getting picked. Can the leads ever just under play that? I believe Andy picks Josh but at this point it does look like she has crazy chemistry with Nick. Do you think for most leads they are clear on who their final will be? Do you think Andi truly feels deeply for both Nick and Josh and choosing one was a hard decision?

What do you think made Jason choose Melissa at the time instead of Molly?

Thanks!

Comment: I think Andi knew from early on Josh was her man. She signed a contract. She has a show to be on for “x” amount of episodes. You can’t just shut it down and pretend to dislike everyone else for 2 months and only play up the guy you like. I’m sure she liked other guys. I’m also sure she knew it was Josh early on, just like most leads knew early on who they were going to pick.

I don’t know. I’ve never asked Jason.
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Hey Steve,

Major fan from Montreal, Canada. I’ve been watching the bachelor franchise consistently since Matt Grant, and casually “force” my husband to watch with me. We pretty much watch and do commentary on how ridiculous and contrived it is. (I read your spoilers like it would be the bible, he prefers I didn’t, and have a “virgin” season, but I just can’t do it. I essentially pretend I don’t know how the season pans out and casually admit to having known since day one by end of season.)

My question for you is a small technicality:
Andi is a Jewish girl. It seemed that during her hometown with Juan Pablo last season that her family seems to be slightly on the observant/traditional side (her sister’s husband’s name is definitely a Hebrew name anglicized). How could they not cast a single obviously Jewish contestant for her in the mix?

I’m sure the answer from you will be as basic as “I don’t know” or “they just don’t”, but I find it bizarre that religion is really never brought up (except in cases where it’s obvious the bachelor/ette is a staunch catholic and mentions they go to church on the reg). Because she’s not strict Jewish, so it obviously wasn’t any sort of deal breaker.

Also: Josh is a combination of Gaston from beauty and the beast and Jafar from Aladdin. Well aware I’m comparing him to animated characters.

Also #2: Canadian bachelor season two is scheduled to start soon. I know you don’t care for our train wreck bargain basement adaptation, but I can assure you it’s pretty awful. Low budget, girls are sub-par with terrible “careers”. No Chris Harrison in suits from the Chris Harrison for Da Vinci Clothing line. Never seen it. Never will.

Oh. Another question:

Considering Chris Harrison has his obviously uber successful clothing line, why isn’t he forcing all the men to wear his suits? Or really cross promoting the hell out of himself? Is he not allowed? Or is it because his clothing line is CHEESY? No idea. That thing still in business?

AND LAST ONE:

Read the beginning of Courtney’s book. Who’s the production couple she and Ben spent so much time with? And truth? It seems like this season went downhill with Cassie Lambert on perpetual Mat leave and that Elan Gale taking charge.

Okay. That’s it. I know you’ll make fun of me on the site for the length and wordiness of this, but it’s my first email to you EVER and I’m just so damn excited.

Comment: Cassie and Pete Scalettar. Cassie has only been out the last 2 seasons.
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Hi Steve,

I know I promised to leave you alone but can’t keep that promise.

I guess I need reassurance from you again.

I don’t care if it’s snarky.

All I’m hearing from the forums are that Josh is the physical one and in all bachelorette history the physical one is always F3 or F4.

Help……

Comment: I don’t care what others say. It’s all speculation. They don’t know what I know. Irrelevant. Andi and Josh got engaged on May 9th and are still engaged to this day.
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Hi Steve,

First time emailing you, but, like many, have only been able to survive watching the show with your sarcastic commentaries and spoilers. I legitamately LOL!! Have just a few questions… after the last rose ceremony takes place (from 2 to 1) and the lead is finally with their chosen one, how much time do they get to spend together until they part? 3-4 days.

Do you think anyone will speak about Nick’s video at all? be it at the live “after the final rose” or after the whole show ends? Negative 1 billion % chance the show addresses the plane video. That’s acknowledging me, and essentially acknowledging I win. They’d never do that.

My other question is about their contracts. I was wondering how long they (both leads and contestants) are not “allowed” to speak about their experience, be on the hot seat about what really happened etc., without breaching their contract? Molly and Jason tend to speak into detail about their experiences and it’s fine, but they were on a while ago..

Thanks for all you do!

Comment: You’re under contract for a year from the time the finale airs. But technically, you have a “lifetime” contract where you can’t just go spilling show secrets publicly. Jason and Molly do spill stuff, but I don’t think anything they spill is anything people haven’t suspected in the first place. There’s so much more stuff those two know that they don’t say, that I think it’s fine. Same goes with me. There’s just stuff I could never say that I know behind-the-scenes. I mean, I could. I just won’t.

Hi steve, not really a question but just a random observation. I’m about 100 pgs into Courtney’s book and you were right, it is very entertaining. I never really “like” or “dislike” any of the people on this silly show, it just is what it is, and I always thought Courtney was pretty funny/misunderstood insofar as how she was portrayed. I know there is 0% chance of her ever being cast as the bachelorette, but I think she as b-ette would make for extremely entertaining tv. I like your readings of the excerpts, keep up the good work!

Comment: Yeah, Courtney basically sealed her fate with the franchise with that book. They’d never cast her and she’d never do it I assume. That ship has sailed. They’d never give the lead to anyone who ever had a “villain” edit anyway. Sorry Nick.
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Perhaps someone already informed you, but Sean and Catherine are set to appear on an episode of Next Great Baker on TLC. I don’t watch it, but I saw the commercial because I watch a lot of crap reality TLC shows. Just can’t stand their farewhoreing, or that of any other Bachelor people. Do they really make enough money doing these kind of things to not have real jobs?

Comment: Sean made a lot from DWTS, so I’m guessing they’re just living mostly off that right now.

15 thoughts on ““Reader Emails,” “Dr. Reality Steve,” & Live Video Chat Tonight at 9:00pm EST/6:00pm PST

  1. Ew, I had a similar situation as the Dr. Reality Steve emailer. D is a typical “thrill of the chase” guy who only wants you when he can’t have you. I got rid of my “D” once and for all, and so should you.

  2. Hi Steve,

    Thanks for the amaze balls job you do! :) (yes, I said amaze balls! LOL)

    Do you know what the contestants do with the roses as they progress thru the season & following the show? Do they keep them as mementos/press them, or do they get ditched from country-to-country, location-to-location?

    Also, any truth to the rumor that Nikki is supposedly engaged? She tweeted a photo of her & JP’s hand while they were looking at soccer player trading cards. Supposedly, her hand had a diamond ring on THAT finger. Then, I hear that they spent the 4th of July separately. Are they together or not? Engaged or not?

    Thanks so much!
    M~

  3. For the Dr. RS emailer. All you need to know is that a guy who’s truly into you will drop everything, anytime to be with you, unless it’s totally impossible (I.e. His Mothers birthday or an important work function). If he’s not that interested, his behavior will reflect that. That doesn’t mean he won’t accept sex on the side if you’re gullible enough to believe his excuses. He know you won’t buy it forever, but he’s playing it out as long as he can get away with it. Guys are simple creatures to understand. Don’t overcomplicate.

    Good advice to “yoga guy”. Almost without exception, starting a business take several years to become financial successes. It’s not uncommon for it to take 5-10 years to really mature. The answer to this problem is really simple. Just as RS noted, have a second job, even if it’s just 20 hrs/wk to pay the bills. Anyone who thinks they will be an instant financial success is just naive. Starting a business is hard. I’m sure RS knows this well from the time it took for his success. Early followers of this site would have thought Steve would have been lucky to cover his website costs with his blog. Now look at him.

  4. So I guess with the MTA filming this weekend would mean that Chris has signed on the dotted line?….

    What a boring season this has been I can’t wait until its over and Andi and Aaron (oops I mean Josh) can ride off into the sunset. (or to their weekly football games and everything else Aaron related). Time for Andi to pack away her crown…

    Maybe it was the edit, but I didn’t care for Josh’s family in the least.

  5. Just a comment of observation here: I always enjoy reading the reader’s emails – if only for reading how Steve answers the emails. It is interesting to me – as he actually doesn’t like/do gossip. He runs a blog/site about the show, and I think it draws people in who want to chit chat or gossip about the show – but he draws a very hard line of fact – but it’s awkward, because people write in wanting his thoughts, or comments, etc. on subjects – and he just refuses to get sucked in. And I’ll totally admit I think its fun to chit chat and analyze, I do it too, it’s the nature of these types of reality shows, they want to be talked about – but sometimes Steve just takes the wind out of the sails of a person who just innocently wants an expert opinion on something, but if it is not stemmed in fact, Steve just doesn’t go there. Which is not a bad thing either – I’m just making observations here, not passing judgement. It’s just that the Bach, or ette, or BP or BIP are all such fodder for fun gossipy conversations – and its a bit paradoxical sometimes to combine that with someone who tries very hard (successfully, I think) ‘not to go there’ and draws that hard line in fact. It takes some of the fun out of it, but I also admire the tenacity it takes to keep up that kind of reporting perspective – which I think is why so many end up trusting him, that consistency of fact and discretion. Just musings.

  6. See, I see Steve as a completely different type of resource for my viewing of this franchise. I want the facts as he gets them. Details, specifics and any other bits & pieces. I’ve never considered him a “chatter” or even a part of the Bachelorsphere.

    I have a board I frequent, and we blather about personal opinions, possibilities, preferences and emotional reactions.

    Here, I just want the dirt. There, I want to dish it.

    But as always, YMMV.

  7. I have a good friend who knows the Aaron Murray family quite well.

    According to my friend, Andi will have to pass several tests in order to gain full access to all family activities.

    She will be required to:

    1). Attend at least 3 workshops on face painting and effective tailgating.
    2). Sleep with Aaron while Josh watches.
    3). Receive a full Murray genetics blood transfusion.
    4). Agree to fill her face with Botox and Fillers so she will match the pillow faces of her future in-laws.
    5). Give up friends, career and privacy in order to become fully immersed in the Murray experience.

    I think she picked a real winner. Go Andi.

  8. For the viewer/writer who thought Josh said he was ready to get married AGAIN, I checked my DVR after reading this. What Josh said was “at the end” and not AGAIN.

  9. Steve, FYI: I believe that the British bachelor, Matt, made out with Marshana (spelling?), a black contestant, though that is of note more for his allegedly ambiguous sexual orientation than for her skin color.

  10. The only thing I’d add to the comment about RS sticking to the facts and not engaging in gossip is that, if that’s the case, why publish the emails and anser them in these ways:
    1.) Don’t know, don’t care.
    2.) That question is cray-cray
    3.) You’re reading way too much into that

    If RS doesn’t want to entertain gossip, why publish the question and give a non answer? I find that a bit annoying.

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