Dr. Reality Steve

“Dr. Reality Steve” & a Clip from Monday’s Episode

Man this Amy Schumer stuff is kinda getting out of control, no? I mean yes, she was great on the show and I could watch her ripping on these guys for days, but lets tap the brakes a bit on Amy becoming the next “Bachelorette.” I don’t see that happening at all. Amy doesn’t need the “Bachelorette” for one. They need her way more than she needs them. Plus, just like Kimmel last season, in that short small role, they can shine. Amy can’t be the “Bachelorette” cracking jokes all season because I doubt anyone would take her seriously – even her. I don’t think she could keep a straight face doing that show. When we see Amy, we want to see her in her element. Watching her for 11 weeks pretend to try and fall for a bunch of personal trainers and bartenders? Please. It wouldn’t be the least bit believable. This is all just hype off her appearance Monday to keep people talking. Amy Schumer is not gonna be the next “Bachelorette.” No chance, no how.

With my 40th birthday party a week from today in Vegas, I decided to add a little trivia game for those in attendance with prizes to the winner. The tough part of doing “Bachelor/ette” trivia is, this is my job. I know this stuff like the back of my hand. So to me, the questions are easy. But come next Friday night when you won’t be able to google this stuff and you have only a selected amount of time to answer, it’ll definitely be harder, but how much? Example. This isn’t one of the questions next week, but there are some that are kind of along these lines:

“Which season had a Muay Thai boxing group date?”

Now, if you didn’t know you could easily google it and find out. I’m sure a lot of you know it’s Ashley’s season, but will those in attendance be able to remember that off the top of their head. We’ll see. Whoever wins the contest will get a mention in next week’s column, so I guess they have that to look forward to. I’ll probably Periscope the trivia game next Friday night as well so if you want to watch at home you can see how you’d fare. Although you’ll have an advantage since you’d be able to Google the answers.

Don’t forget the live video chat is back tonight at 9:00pm EST/6:00pm PST. I’ll be taking your questions on all things “Bachelorette” and anything else you want to talk about. We can even talk UnREAL if you’d like. I don’t want to spoil it for you guys, but I can give you some insight to the season from what I’ve seen so far. Come back to the site around 4:00pm CST and you can begin asking your questions.

Here’s a clip from Monday’s episode when the Sumo wrestlers come and wake the guys up:


____________________________________________________________________

Dr. Reality Steve

Ok…I’ve been dating my boyfriend for about 10 months now. We talk about things like getting married, buying a house, having kids, etc. I truly believe he loves me and I do him.

Last night, he was logged into his Gmail account and I saw that he had messaged his former girlfriend yesterday morning. I didn’t confront him about it because I felt bad…I’d inadvertently seen the message but purposefully opened the thread and read it. The conversation was innocuous enough. He asked her how she’d been lately; she said fine/busy; she asked the same and he answered in kind. That’s it…end of convo.

The thing that bothered me was…1.) He called her “Roo”…I’m assuming this is a nickname that he used to use for her. 2.) I hadn’t heard from him all day when he usually at least texts me, and yet he reached out to her when he saw that she was online.

Anyways, I know I’m hyper-sensitive because I’ve been cheated on in the past (with an ex-) and it’s something that I constantly fear…not just with him, but with anyone I’ve dated. But, seriously…”Roo”. WTF? Do you think that this is something I should be concerned with or should I just chalk it up to them still being on decent terms and move on?

Comment: First and foremost, the fact your boyfriend calls his ex “Roo” in the first place is grounds for a break up. That’s just silly and dumb and his manhood is immediately thrown into question.

It’s a slippery slope when reading emails and/or texts of your significant other. If you don’t want to know, then don’t read. And if you do read, just know you might find stuff you didn’t want to. What he wrote does seem innocent enough, but if after 10 months this is even the first you’ve heard of him contacting his ex, you can probably bet this wasn’t the first email he’s sent her since you guys have been together. Nor the last.

With that in mind, I would just keep it filed away for now because it’s not like he cheated on you or anything. But I’m sure it set off a red flag for you. Are you going to tell him you saw it?

If I were you, I’d lay low for now but keep your eyes open.

I hope he has a better nickname for you.
____________________________________________________________________

Dear Dr. Reality Steve,

Beginning of January I ‘met’ on Tinder a guy that we’ll call Kevin (he’s 28 years old and I am 26). We matched while he was in Switzerland (the country I live in) visiting a friend and he left to go back to LA, where he lives and is from, the day after we started talking so we never met in person. But we started to text everyday, watched movies at the same time despite the time difference (I know so cheesy), send lists of our favorite movies to each other with little comments explaining why we liked the movie or why it was special to us, started to flirt, etc. After a while we decided it would be awesome to meet in person as we had this great connection and felt we had known each other forever. I had a week off in Easter and had never been to California so I booked a flight to go see him. It was great timing because I learned I got accepted to Berkeley and UCLA to do my master of Law so it was a great opportunity for me to visit the 2 universities and see if I would like life in California.

It might sound crazy to go meet someone I had never met in person or even video chat with but I really wanted to see what could happened and felt I would regret it if I didn’t do it. (Also his sister had been in a well-known reality show I used to watch so I was reassured about who he was and as he is in the movie industry it was easy to check if what he was saying about producing movies was right ahah)

Things got a little complicated as in the middle of February I reconnected via Tinder (I know it’s there again) with a guy, let’s call him Derek (he will be 29 years old this year), who had been in my class at university. We talked briefly on Tinder and then met one evening at a club. After that we started hanging out once or twice a week.

I told him I was leaving for LA a few days before I was actually leaving (I left the 1st of April) to visit universities and see Kevin. He knew Kevin and I were texting quite a bit but I told him Kevin was just a friend and didn’t really feel like telling him: ‘Hey! I’m leaving to see a guy I never saw in person!’

He told me he would be pissed if something happened between Kevin and I so I asked him if that meant we were boyfriend-girlfriend and he said no, that it was too early to talk about that. He also told me that he was still on Tinder but ‘just to look at some profiles for fun’.

I left for LA and things were awesome with Kevin! He came to pick me up at the airport with flowers and a cute sign, we kissed right away, danced like crazy people on some Taylor Swift’s songs, went to concerts, hang out with his roommates and friends, etc. basically the week was great, it felt like I had known him forever and we acted like a couple. He also said he would come in August to Switzerland for my best friend’s wedding.

While I was in LA, Derek texted a lot and after a few days asked if we could be exclusive. I said we should talk about this when I was back in Switzerland and he answered that I was the one pressuring him to be exclusive so he didn’t get why I was not excited he was asking.

When I got back to Switzerland I told Derek that I had sex with Kevin and he said that he never felt what he did for me except with one of his ex, that I would have gotten along great with his mother, that I ruined everything, that he was just on Tinder to check if I was, that he said we weren’t exclusive before I left because it was a test to see if I could be faithful to him, that I just slept with Kevin to pay for my stay in LA, that he would have put a lot of principles he had away to go out with me (like he said normally he would never go out with someone he slept with on the first date), that I disgusted him, etc.

Don’t ask why but after that we still saw each other and it was always great for a few days and then he would say that he could never forgive me for what I had done, that he didn’t want to see me again, but then we would miss each other and still hang out again. I must say I got to really like him during this time, we laughed and talked a lot, went to restaurants, movies, etc. and prior for me leaving to LA we would just hang out in his room.

This lasted from mid-April to last week. Last week I went to his place and he was mad again (even though the day before he told me we should go to Paris for the week end and that loved spending time with me), couldn’t accept what I had done and he basically took my phone, locked himself in a room and read all of my texts concerning Kevin so he discovered I had slept with him more than once and he then called me a whore, literally threw me a couple of times through a room and hit me. He then threw all my stuff (and myself) out of his apartment. I was so shocked as I never ever had anyone been violent toward me physically and verbally like that. We haven’t talked since then.

Concerning Kevin, I heard once from him since I got back from LA and then no news. Silence. Nothing. Nada. I asked for some explanations as we always told each other we would be honest and not disappear from each other life without at least explaining why we would stop talking because I had suffered from guys doing that to me in the past but he never answered my texts or email. What do you think happened? How can someone be so invested, say he’s honest, plan to come visit soon, etc. and then do that?

The thing is since then I am feeling guilty about the messages Derek read (in some of them I was saying to friends I liked Kevin more than him, etc. but it was from when I was in LA and I really grew into liking Derek after spending more time with him since I got back) and I feel that maybe he was the ‘man of my life’ or something crazy like that! Even though he told me a couple of times I was always lucky in my professional life (which is not luck, I just work very hard), that he tried twice to find an internship but failed and that meant the exterior world hates him, that he always has relationships problems (one of his ex got an abortion and the other was bipolar and had to go to a mental hospital), etc. He also has debts but doesn’t search for a job and just works a couple hours a week at his dad office. He also said he was concerned with the world and I was a superficial person for liking to read gossips and watch reality-tv (I do but I also do charity work and am concerned with helping people) and that so many people in his family were very talented but had no recognition while some people like Rihanna were famous (I have no clue why I remember he specifically mentioned her, but here you go with useless details), that I was way to friendly with people, emotionally immature, etc.
He also said he knew that I had slept with Kevin because on a picture I posted of us on the beach our towels were ‘too close’ to each other…

So I really don’t get why since everything happened I really miss him and am jealous imagining him with other girls… I just have this little voice in my head saying that if I didn’t do things with Kevin, my relationship with Derek would have been perfect and that we would have had the best of time. Which if I am rational can’t be true because he is a violent person (he told me he had been violent once with his ex) and kept putting me down with his remarks. I just always go back to: but if I hadn’t slept with Kevin, he would not have said that or acted that way and he would be super nice and things would be great.

What do you think about the whole situation and the fact I never got any news from Kevin?

Also I will read the comments so anyone who has an opinion on all of this mess feel free to write!

Sorry for this very long email!

Shaken Sad Swiss

Comment: The alliterations are back! Even from other countries!

Ok, Derek threw you and hit you. That’s assault. I’d stay far away from that guy as possible no matter how many times he says he’s sorry and no matter how many times he begs for you back. He’s a loser and doesn’t deserve your time. Don’t beat yourself up over what you did with Kevin for a week in LA thinking that if you didn’t things would be good with Derek. 1) You could do whatever you want with Kevin because before you left, Derek even told you you weren’t a couple. 2) His actions after you got back of taking your phone and locking himself away so he could read your texts is ridiculous and bat sh** crazy. That’s looney town and you should never have anything to do with him ever again. Don’t begin to feel guilty about how Derek acted after finding out about Kevin. He’s the issue, not you.

Unfortunately for the Kevin guy, I think he just had his fun with you but now that he’s in LA and you’re thousands of miles away, you’re not a priority. I’m guessing you’re one of many girls on his list.
____________________________________________________________________

Hi Steve,

My friends and I are on confused on this one, so I thought we’d toss it your way for a male opinion. Last July (yes, almost a year ago), I went on the perfect first date after texting/chatting with a guy I met online for about a month.. There was dinner, drinks, kissing at Grand Central Station, and as the Bachelor would call it- “a connection”. It was great because I knew we were both into it, and I had finally come to the philosophy that I didn’t want to force anything- so I would follow the guy’s lead. He texted me several times each day afterwards letting me know he really liked me/was excited to see me again soon. We made plans for about a week later, but the day prior one of his friends from college passed away and he cancelled. Then he faded away, calling me about a month later to apologize for dropping off saying timing wasn’t right, he was going through a lot with his friend’s death. I understood, we stopped chatting, and then a month or so later I found out he had a new girlfriend. Since we met just the one time, and had only been talking a month or so- I wasn’t too upset and just sort of forgot he existed.

Then in February he randomly texted me to see how things were going- asking some prying ‘who are you dating’ questions- I was pretty evasive and didn’t ask him anything about his personal life figuring he just wanted to tell me he had a girlfriend… Fast forward to today (with no texts since that one day in February), he contacted me again to ‘see how things are’ and to ask me out for drinks (I checked- still has the same girlfriend). I am pretty confused by the whole thing. I am pretty sure going out for drinks is a bad idea- but I am intrigued by the whole thing, so I decided to write you instead to get your opinion.

Sincerely,
Confused in Connecticut

Comment: Creep. Why would you agree to meet up with a guy who you know has a girlfriend? What’s the point? You guys aren’t long lost friends who he wants to catch up with. From what I gathered, you’ve met him once in your life and have exchanged texts. Yeah, he wants to meet you for drinks because he wants to hook up. He doesn’t know that you know he has a girlfriend, so he’s gonna try to see what he can get away with.

I’d steer clear of him. Drama.
____________________________________________________________________

Send all links and emails to: steve@realitysteve.com. To follow me on Twitter, it’s: www.twitter.com/RealitySteve. Instagram name is “RealitySteve,” or join my Reality Steve Facebook Fan Page. Talk to you tonight.

23 Comments

23 Comments

  1. jay2

    May 28, 2015 at 9:42 AM

    Shaken Sad Swiss: I agree with Steve on his advice. You need to move on and block Derek from your life. Derek was not the love of your life. He was just a big violent loser who played games with your mind. He was not accepting responsibility for any of the verbal violence he did to you and what made him stop was reaching the physical violence part. He was blaming you over and over and putting you down. Why would you want to be with someone like that? a person who really loves you, will be supportive not a downer. Yes, you had some kind of connection with him but that doesn’t mean he is the love of your life. He is sick, if he was violent to his ex and to you, he will be violent again, mark my words. Just move on, forget about him, you are about to start a new chapter in your life in LA that should be a happy one. Having said so, you should analyze your past relationships and look for trends. Why on earth are you attracted to Derek? what is about him that floats your boat? were any of your previous boyfriends like him? I bet you that you will find that some of your exes whom you really loved, were exactly like Derek. We tend to date the same kind of people over and over. I certainly do. Use this experience to learn more about yourself so next time you are in a relationship, you don’t land again with another Derek.

  2. jay2

    May 28, 2015 at 9:46 AM

    Confused in CT: Steve is right. This guy just wants to hook up. Maybe now that he has been with the girlfriend for months, his initial spark has faded and, like a drug addict he is looking for his next hit. If the date you guys had was as good as you mentioned, he probably wants to see if the chemistry is still there, but he is not serious. If he was serious or honest, he would fess up that he has a gf. He just wants to keep his options open in case something happens with you. But really, do you want to date someone like that? let’s assume he breaks up with his gf and starts dating you, after a few months of dating, he will be calling another girl with whom he had a good connection behind your back. Rinse, repeat. not really worth your time. He is not a keeper. I would chalk up your date to a nice date you had once upon a time and move on with other guys.

  3. rob22

    May 28, 2015 at 10:02 AM

    “Beginning of January I ‘met’ on Tinder a guy”…..

    You really didn’t need to write any more. Not saying it’s 100% impossible to find a guy who’s serious boyfriend material on Tinder (I’ll conservatively go with 99%, though)… but when you write a Dr. Reality Steve question about someone you met on Tinder, the two most likely answers are (1) You’re just a hookup to him or (2) the guy’s a loser. You just happened to get both answers to the same question.

  4. rob22

    May 28, 2015 at 10:23 AM

    Oh, and btw: when you are non exclusive, and hook up, and then tell the guy…. then either (A) he gets over it fairly quickly & you move forward or (B) it bothers him a lot & you don’t. (C) it bothers him, and he keeps bringing it up, calling you names & then gets violent…. we’ll you could have avoided “C” if you realized the answer all along was “B”.

    I had a girl spring this on me when I was dating in college. I asked for some time to think about it. It’s hard to process something like that in the moment. After two days of thinking it over, I told her I understood, appreciated her honesty & that I was ready to let it go & not be an issue for us. We dated very seriously for 2 years. Of course, she had made it clear that she had dumped the other guy & wanted to date me, but wanted to have full disclosure. Which, after thinking it over, I appreciated.

  5. walker

    May 28, 2015 at 12:34 PM

    To Sad Swiss: Kevin or not, from what you wrote,Derek would never have been a ” super nice guy” for the long haul – inevitably, something would have set him off and he would have hit you – things would never have been “great” with him over a long span of time – any one can put the charm on for a little while while wooing, but already you were noticing him belittling your interests, your work, who you are etc. – please do not give him another chance; be happy that you found out his potential for violence/meanness before getting more attached or starting a family with him. Are you still heading to California for Law School? If so, take the time and space away from Derek to get over him – do not stay in touch over any media while away – make a clear and certain break. Re: Kevin. If you end up at UCLA no harm in sending him word that you will be living in LA and would like to see him again if he is available. Even if he has moved on and has a girlfriend, your one-time connection may allow you to be friends and may help you meet other people in such a big city. If he continues to ignore your attempts to re-connect – let him go too and enjoy the memories of a fun California visit. Personally, I would pick Berkeley over UCLA – fun town and very friendly in general – bonus that it is close to San Francisco and Lake Tahoe (you may miss the mountains and seasons if you live in LA) Good Luck. I hope you do go to California for Law School – great adventure and both great law schools. PS: I wouldn’t worry too much about either of these guys, once you do go to law school, you will be meeting lots of interesting men/women with similar career goals and at a similar place in their lives – not sure you are ready for your one and only everlasting relationship anyway – follow your dreams, the rest will happen when the time is right. PPS: My understanding from talking to male friends is that most men use Tinder for multiple casual hook-ups rather than looking for a long-term meaningful monogamous relationship. If you want casual hook-ups for a fun time, continue to use Tinder to meet men; if you want a deeper relationship based on mutual desire to find a life partner, try more commitment based dating sites or meet people doing activities you enjoy.

  6. karynr

    May 28, 2015 at 3:01 PM

    Sad Swiss, please do not consider a life of domestic violence. It won’t get better, it will only get worse. Then, if things go further, you might be looking at someone who thinks it’s okay to be violent with his children, or in front of them. Please run the other direction and don’t look back.

  7. karynr

    May 28, 2015 at 3:03 PM

    Chris and Whitney announced their break-up.

  8. momma3j

    May 28, 2015 at 3:42 PM

    Dear Shaken Sad Swiss,
    I concur with the general consensus to stay away from Derek. Not only is he violent, but controlling and manipulative too. To “test whether you’d be faithful” is a load of you-know-what. Faithful to what? He didn’t want to be exclusive before your trip. That was his problem. Had he said yes to being a couple, I am pretty sure (I don’t know you, but I think) you would have been faithful.
    As for Kevin…did he know about Derek like Derek knew about him? While I can see Steve’s and everyone else’s point of view, I also wonder if maybe Derek contacted him after seeing your texts. It could be Derek invaded your privacy long before you witnessed him do it. Anything is possible and if Derek was sick enough to clue Kevin in, that could be a reason why he stopped talking to you.

  9. ilovehockey

    May 28, 2015 at 6:58 PM

    Sad swiss…
    I agree with momma3j above…The first thing I thought of was that Derek probably got Kevins number off your phone and called or texted Kevin to tell him to leave you alone or something.
    Also please dont think “if I hadnt done that or said this then he wouldnt have thrown me across the room and hit me”. No!!! He is a violent person and would hurt you later for something else that makes him mad. Most people would not hit you or throw you no matter what you did or how mad you made them. It would only get worse if you were still with him.

  10. angelsfeet

    May 28, 2015 at 9:44 PM

    Sad Swiss… Derek is clearly a dangerous, deranged, messed-up person. He sounds like a psychopathic stalker type who is also an abuser. STAY AWAY FOREVER. I also was thinking it is possible if not probable that he took down Kevin’s number and ousted him from your life. Having said this, perhaps it’s for the best… find a more local date to the wedding. Remember Kevin fondly, but look ahead to new relationships. You clearly have a lot going for you and a lot in your future. Focus on that (and maybe forgo Tinder from now on).

  11. angelsfeet

    May 28, 2015 at 9:53 PM

    To Connecticut – My reaction wasn’t as strong as Steve’s. I’ve had this happen to me a few times… a guy you hit it off with briefly comes sniffing around when he’s bored. Not really creepy, maybe sleazy, or just lame? Anyway, he may not be looking to hook up, just to see if there’s chemistry and how it compares to his girlfriend. But you’re right… don’t waste your time and meet up with him unless you want to play a game, which you probably don’t since you’re writing for advice. This won’t lead anywhere, unfortunately, even though it had a promising start.

  12. rob22

    May 29, 2015 at 9:20 AM

    angelsfeet: it’s a typical guy trick to kind of sniff around and see what your ex is doing. I agree that sometimes it’s because he’s bored, but there’s usually a motive to find out if there’s a way back in. Not for anything serious, of course, but to see if there are hookup possibilities to cut into the boredom until he finds something better. So, if you are interested in a hook-up with no strings, then you’ll get what you want. Otherwise, don’t entertain it or even respond to it.

    I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. When a guy is strongly interested in more than just a hookup with a girl, it’s not something that you can misinterpret. It will be clear. Guys aren’t that complex. Girls just try to read too much into what guys are up to. If they are truly interested, you’ll know. If there is any doubt, then at most, he’s marginally interested or gay.

    If a guy fails to call you at least a couple of times a week, unless there is truly something unusual & time consuming going on with him that week (out of the country for the week on a massive work project, for example)…. then his interest is minimal. Not calling you for more than a week requires no interpretation. Not calling you for multiple weeks is not a mistake. You’re just low on his list of priorities. It’s not complicated. That’s why it’s so easy for RS to answer these questions.

  13. jay2

    May 29, 2015 at 11:23 AM

    Rob22 please please please start writing your own dating column! I have tons of questions about my own relationship :)

  14. rob22

    May 29, 2015 at 3:21 PM

    jay2: I think I just wrote it. That answers 95% of all relationship questions from women. The best book is “He’s just not that into you”. When you’re wondering what’s going on with some guy…. he’s just not that into you. If he’s into you, there are no questions to ask. It just is.

    To this day, as a married guy, if I’m out of town I call my wife at least every other day. That’s married for a long time. In the dating scene? Frankly, most guys will call (yeah, or maybe text or hit you up on social media chat these days) every day & at least every other day. Consistently contacts you only once a week? Not that into you. You’re down the list. He likes you, but not enough that he feels the need to talk with you often. Most likely the thing he likes about you is that you spread your legs for him when he wants you to. Three weeks between contacts? You’re number 49 on a list of 50….. If he drops off the face of the earth and/or doesn’t return calls/texts, you’re not even on the list anymore. If he suddenly shows up again, he got dumped or something & realizes you’re kind of desperate & might be willing to hook up with him if he puts on a little charm for a bit. As long as he doesn’t have to work too hard, he’ll hang in there for a bit.

    If he’s violent or angry, it’s because he’s violent or angry. That’s not your fault & you can’t change him, though most of those losers will try to get you to believe that it is your fault or that you contribute to their anger in some way. That’s just their game. Nothing you will ever do will change that. Believe it, or not, people do have arguments & don’t swear at each other or hit each other.

    And the whole don’t have sex before marriage thing….or at least not before there’s some sort of commitment… that makes things even more clear. If you’re not sleeping with him & he’s still around. He pretty much loves you & is planning on something permanent.

    Did I miss something?

  15. findthescoop2

    May 29, 2015 at 5:11 PM

    There are some people that have hearing problems and cant hear or understand your live chat. Is there a script of your live chat. I realize they are not close-captioned. I see questions but not your answers. Please respond.
    Thank you

  16. wavecatchingmom

    May 30, 2015 at 7:45 AM

    I live by that book Rob22! It has never steered me wrong, I recently told a guy I had been on 3 dates with… well, the book says… if you aren’t making plans to see me again, you just aren’t that into me. Men are really lazy with women they only see as a hook up, do they want sex with you? YES, do they want a relationship? NO! I don’t actually know if the book says that… but the principle still holds ;). Agree with everyone on the violent guy… he would have eventually tried to control your whole life. Also agree to go to Berkeley! Bay Area is a better lifestyle for a Swiss Miss :).

  17. findthescoop2

    May 30, 2015 at 10:14 AM

    well, just read that Chris Soules wants to do another Bachelor show to find love again. I am thinking ABC is going to do it. He is also talking about dating Becca Tilley. What do you think Steve? Remember Brad Womack? He got to go again. Is ABC going to do that? I am sure if they did, he isn’t going to do another DWTS,

  18. findthescoop2

    May 31, 2015 at 10:08 AM

    nobody answers me. Not even Steve. sigh. I guess we handicapped matters but, we have feelings too and try to keep up with certain shows.

  19. lobsterandbeer

    May 31, 2015 at 10:22 AM

    hi findthescoop2!
    Steve doesn’t answer questions in the comment section, he “pretends” that he doesn’t read the comments, but we know he does! You would be better off writing him an email, beware of a snarky answer however, he isn’t exactly “couth”
    I hope you’re right about Chris doing another show, I think he is adorable and after the snorefests of the last few Bachelors, he had a great personality and I would watch him again! Heck, I even liked Brad, both times and would even watch him again over another Ben, Juan or Sean!! Ha!

  20. angelsfeet

    May 31, 2015 at 3:28 PM

    Rob22: thank you for the refresher which was needed as I have been married for 10 years; am a little rusty on the (true) motives of men. I must say I 100% agree that to find out if he is really interested, hold off on sex. Makes everything clear. Probably good advice for Sad Swiss.

  21. jay2

    May 31, 2015 at 7:23 PM

    Thanks Rob22!

  22. rob22

    June 1, 2015 at 7:49 AM

    As for an Old MacDonald Part Deux, nothing could be more absurd. The first time around was ridiculous, especially after we got a look at the hell on earth that the stuttering, giggling loser calls home.

    If Farmer John can’t close the deal with a fruitcake like Whitney that expressed a willingness to be a baby machine in a desolate wasteland that she’d never even seen…. where the hell does he go from there? I think he’s more likely to marry a sister, a first cousin or a farm animal than find a wife on The Bachelor. Even the crazies must see that.

  23. missannmcd

    June 8, 2015 at 7:23 PM

    Some things in these letters are so painfully obvious. The writer has often already found the correct answer.

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