I know some of you don’t care for when I talk sports either in this column or in my video chat, but hey, my site my rules. I’ll talk about what I want. And I’ve got a little sports somethin’ somethin’ to start off with today. This Tom Brady story is giving me tired head. Enough already. Would they just set a punishment and be done with it please? It’s so ridiculous at this point. And I get it, if you’re a Patriots fan you’re gonna defend your boy and say “How can he get 4 games, but Greg Hardy who was charged with domestic violence got his reduced from 10 games to 4.” I get it. The punishment doesn’t fit the crime. The NFL’s problem is they’ve dragged their feet on this story for 6 MONTHS, so many new things have gotten out, testimony has been leaked, and it’s become one giant clusterf**k. Do I think Tom Brady should be suspended 4 games for maybe, possibly, having knowledge of deflating footballs during a playoff game? No. But it is a rule, and if they think they have evidence that says he may have tampered with the balls, then suspend him. But not 4 games. And don’t take 6 months to do it. Roger Goodell has basically done nothing right in the past calendar year as commissioner. This just adds on to his already failing resume.
Jade and Ashley I. were on the white carpet the other night for ABC’s TCA Winter Press Tour. Don’t ask why, I don’t know. They did an interview with Glamour Magazine and I took a couple things from it:
1) Hey, at least Ashley admits she has the mental capacity of a 17 year old. Props to her.
2) Both of them admitting they were friends with Whitney and weren’t the least bit surprised she and Chris broke up because “they knew some stuff.” And you people think I just make stuff up for effect. I don’t.
On to “Dr. Reality Steve”…
I think I screwed up BIG time. I’ve been friends with this guy for a little over two years. We were working in the same field when we met. He’s 9 years older, and we hit it off as friends right away. I see him about two to three times a year as we live in different parts of the country, but he travels for work a lot. We have a ton of mutual friends etc. Anyways, things have always been on the friend level. Last year, I went to his hotel room to just hang out, and we sat and talked for 5 hours. Nothing happened. People kept trying to say he was interested, but I brushed it off. I was attracted a bit, but knew things didn’t have a chance.
A few weeks ago, we were in the same city again. I went over one night to hang out and catch up on life. Everything was fine until I went to leave. Next thing you know, we are making out, and hooking up. What makes it so awkward, is the fact that he is married and I feel like a home wrecker now. I’ve talked with his wife before, and know her. We kept saying it won’t be weird, and I’ve talked to him since, even seeing him the next morning. I’m just not sure if our friendship is ruined.
Comment: I wouldn’t call you a home wrecker if this was a one time thing and he initiated it. Granted, you didn’t stop him and I’m sure you feel guilty, but doesn’t make you a horrible person. Now, if this continues with him then yeah, I’d say there’s an issue. But at this point, the problem is more with him and his wife than with you. Obviously he’s got marriage problems, he was on the road and bored, so you were a warm body that he felt comfortable with, so he did it. I’m sure you’re not the first one and probably won’t be the last. I would just never do it again unless you want that home wrecker label.
I mean, should you have done it? No. But this doesn’t sound like something you’ve been pursuing, knew he was married and didn’t care, and you just want to have an affair with a married man. I guess I just assumed something and maybe I shouldn’t have, but did you know he was married? I’m guessing you did. Still, I think you realize you shouldn’t have done it, but I wouldn’t call you a home wrecker for it.
Earlier this year, I dated a guy named Matt for 8 months. I really thought that he was ‘the one’, but I eventually realized that it wasn’t going to work out with him when he told me that I wasn’t what he was looking for in a wife. After we broke up, I decided to attend graduate school overseas, and I will be leaving the country shortly. Over the summer, I went on several short vacations, and Matt has joined me on many of them, as a friend. (My other friends proved to be quite annoying by joking that Matt and I were going on dates together.)
A few days ago, on our last trip, Matt said to me that he made a mistake breaking up with me and he wants to start dating again. Ordinarily I would be ecstatic about this, but the fact that I am moving several thousand miles away makes things much more difficult. While Matt is interested in going to graduate school near me, he still has one more year of college left, so we would be dating long-distance over next 10 months. Another factor is that our graduate school plans are somewhat inflexible, so it is a real possibility that we will have to deal with a long-distance relationship again several years from now.
One reason that this is difficult for me is that I feel like I have taken a few steps backward over the past few months while we were just friends. I am not in love with him anymore, and it is going to take time to build that up again. I am concerned that I won’t be able to get back to where we used to be because of the physical distance.
So here’s my question: should I give this a chance and date long distance? Or is ‘the right person at the wrong time’ really just the wrong person?
Comment: Well, I don’t know enough about him to say whether or not he’s definitely the wrong person. But you’re right when you say that is possibly right person wrong time. Do you really want to start your relationship that way? Long distance is hard enough as it is. This situation looks to be even harder because it doesn’t sound like there’s a lot of free time for either of you, and traveling cross country to see each other would get expensive.
Why do you feel like you’ve taken a step back? Because you closed yourself off to dating other people while you were hanging with him? And I know people grow and people can change their minds, but he did tell you already once you weren’t what he was looking for in a wife. Did you ask him what changed? Did he give specifics? It’s one thing to tell someone things aren’t working out, or there are issues in the relationship, but to flat out tell someone they aren’t what you were looking for in a future spouse? Kinda hard to unring that bell. That’ll always stick with you and I’m sure you’ll always wonder (if you ever did take him back) at what point he might bring that up again.
Sounds like he maybe just wants what he can’t have, or is just gonna miss you when you’re gone.
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