Reality Steve

Bachelorette JoJo Spoilers

“Bachelorette” JoJo Episode-by-Episode Spoilers

Photo Credit: ABC

Episode 2: (airing May 30th) Los Angeles, CA (20 to 17)

Group Date: 10 guys competed in a fireman training course. They awarded at top 3: Grant, Robby, and Wells actually got top 3, but Wells was more for sympathy. The guy practically passed out. Probably because he looks like he weighs 120 lbs soaking wet. Grant ended up “winning” between those three. Then again, he is a firefighter in real life. At the after party (which you can see far away pics from below) on the rooftop of Level apartments, Wells got the group date rose.

1-on-1: Derek Peth. JoJo picked him up in her car and they drove to the Burbank airport and took a private plane to San Francisco, where they had a picnic together. OK! Magazine got photos of them before they took off. Derek got a rose.

Group date: 6 guys (Chad, James Taylor, Christian, Alex, Jordan, and Nick B.) met JoJo at LA Live then went to the SportsNation studios where Marcellus Wiley and Max Kellerman film their show. Marcellus actually spoiled it that day, before quick deleting his tweets. Luckily I caught it in time:

So basically all 6 guys had to “compete” in three different events.

Event #1 – They were put in arm pads, they had a rose in their hand, and a bouquet of flowers, and like a football drill, had to run through the other five guys to get to JoJo. It got a little rough with some of the hits guys were putting on others.

Event #2 – They had to spin their head on a baseball bat, then walk to JoJo and come up with a proposal for her all while being dizzy. This is where Chad calls JoJo “naggy.” Basically he says these proposals are fake, he doesn’t want to be fake, the whole thing is dumb, and JoJo had made a comment about how Chad’s proposal wasn’t great, and he mentions to Marcellus she was naggy. Something along those lines. Dude, every other guy there is doing it. It’s fun. This is what the show is. Put down your Muscle Milk and actually enjoy yourself.

Event #3 – It was a press conference. One at a time each guy would go up, sit next to JoJo, and Marcellus would ask questions. This is where the other guys started pointing out Chad was the villain, he’s roided out, he’s a bully, etc., because some of the questions were “Who do you like best in the house? Who do you like least?” And I guess everyone pretty much said Chad. Chad would then step in and interrupt other guys time when they were 1-on-1 with JoJo during the press conference. The hosts ended up choosing a “winner” based on all 3 events, and they determined Alex was #1, and Chad was #2. The after party was at Houdini’s mansion and James Taylor got the group date rose.

Rose Ceremony Eliminations: Will Haduch, Brandon Howell, and James Spadafore.

Episode 3: (airing June 6th) Los Angeles, CA (17 to 14)

1-on-1: Chase McNary. They did a hot Yoga date. Sounded similar to what Clare and Mikey Tenerelli did in Paradise last season. They were all hot and sweaty, and had them in sexual positions. The ususal. Afterwards they went to a vineyard close to the mansion and a band played for them. Chase got a rose.

Group date: Sunday night sex talks. This was covered in a post on March 24th, but now I can give the names to who told what story. The 12 guys on the date were: Nick B., Chad, James F., Evan, Christian, Daniel, Vinny, Ali, Grant, Jordan, Wells, and Alex.

The show was “hosted” by Jenna Brister and they were brought in to listen to her and others speakers tell a sex story. Then they were told they were each going to be telling stories. They were brought outside while the host and other speakers told stories including how they can have an orgasm without using anything. That was the warm up.

JoJo went first and basically cursed up a storm the whole story while cracking up and laughing throughout. She told a story about how she grew up in a conservative household, but her and her boyfriend at the time who was also from a Christian based family and very conservative, just felt they wanted to move forward with the relationship. JoJo said she had gone to Walmart and bought condoms, lube, and anal beads (she said she didn’t buy them but they were in her Walmart bag when she opened it), and she and her then boyfriend went to a cul-de-sac and parked. They started to undress and cops showed up and took them both to their parents. Her boyfriends parents hated her and they ended up breaking up, never having had sex. She lost her virginity two years later at 19. Ok, not a bad story. Not sure why she felt the need to tell us what she bought at Walmart outside of the condoms, but hey, good on ya’ JoJo. And sssssuuuuuuuuuuuure you didn’t buy the anal beads. They just happened to end up in your bag. However, that was just the appetizer for what was to come. Like I said, you’ve been warned. Here’s who told what stories:

Jordan told a story about being in college and putting on a speedo and going into a dorm down the hall that had a girl he thought was cute. He ended up walking in and there being 8-9 girls. He hung out in his speedo. He said one girl asked him if he was cold and he said he looked down and realizes his penis looked small so he went into the bathroom to “shake it” to make it fill out the speedo more. He ended up sitting with some girls, one girl was rubbing the inside of his thigh and he got a hard on that he couldn’t get rid of. He tried to get rid of it and nothing worked, so he gave in and went into her bathroom and jerked off and left his remains on the bathroom rug.

Christian told a story about apparently he loves bubble baths. He was basically talking about how when the guys go to bed at night after a rose ceremony, they all jerk off, and the bachelor mansion plumber has to pump out gallons of sperm. This guy said he took a bubble bath in what he thought was “soap,” and ended up being sperm.

Alex talked about having sex with a girl and sticking a men’s vibrating razor up her ass while having sex, pulling it out and her sh****ng everywhere. That’s all I was given. I don’t think I need to hear anymore on that one.

Vinny talked about his mom leaving for Zumba class, and they had a two story house and he loved the stairs cause you could hear someone going up and down. He had a neighbor he liked and she would give him the best hand jobs in the backyard under the trampoline. He texted her when his mom left, she came over met him in the backyard, they ended up going upstairs, he said his door was open and he was facing the stairs, heard his moms car beep, tried to finish before she got inside, and he said he was still having sex when his mom walked in on him. Sounds like the tamest story of them all. Getting walked in on while having sex? Psssshhh. The other guy was sticking vibrating…forget it.

Nick B. talked about going down on a girl was his first time. His parents were gone for the day. He said his friends and told him about going down on a girl “it would smell like fish” or to “do the alphabet with your tongue.” This was his bit up on stage. He kept demonstrating how he made the alphabet with his tongue. He said he was going at it and his neighbor caught him when he came over looking for the dad, and the next day he got the talk from his parents about the birds and the bees.

Daniel had a story about his fetishes, and one is cutting girls hair off during sex. So I guess he did that once. Bizarre.

Wells story had to do with a threesome – but like the worst threesome ever. He was actually getting a colonoscopy, so while a doctor was putting a finger in his ass, the nurse was pushing down on his stomach. Yep. Horrible threesome.

-Not sure about Ali, Grant, and James F’s stories. Probably for the better.

-The drama happened with the last two guys. Evan went up second to last, and because he has sons and didn’t want them to possibly hear it someday, he just started ripping Chad talking about people on testosterone, their veiny, they have mood swings, etc. Once he was done, Chad was last to go and as they cross each other, Chad pushes him and rips Evan’s shirt. Chad refused to tell a story because, yet again, he thinks the whole thing is stupid. So he tries to get a kiss from JoJo and she rejects him. And to make matters worse, at the after party, Evan gets the group date rose and Chad is pissed. Shocker.

1-on-1: James Taylor. They took the car out to a park before they went swing dancing in Culver City. Ok! Magazine also had pictures of this date back when it happened. James got a rose.

On the day of the rose ceremony, they had a pool party in place of the nighttime cocktail party. Basically what you’d expect. Chicken fights, JoJo in a bikini, dudes shooting water guns at each other, JoJo in a bikini, JoJo in a bikini, and oh yeah, an excuse to show JoJo in a bikini so Mike Fleiss could get his jollies. They’ve shown a clip of this in the preview and you hear JoJo say, “Evan are you bleeding?” They make you think it may have been caused from one of the other guys, but he got it from diving. We even see in one teaser of Chris Harrison showing up at the pool party pulling Chad aside to tell him some of the guys felt uncomfortable around him.

Guys who didn’t have dates this week: Luke, Robby, and Derek.

Rose Ceremony Eliminations: Christian Bishop, Nick Benvenutti, and Ali Zahiri.

Episode 4: (airing June 7th) Nemacolin Woodlands Resort, PA. (14 to 11)

1-on-1: Luke Pell. They went sledding through the woods that brought them to a hot tub, then went to a concert by Dan + Shay. A recap of this date along with tons of pictures and videos was posted back on March 29th. Luke got a rose.

Group Date: 11 guys (Grant, Jordan, Chase, Robby, Vinny, James Taylor, Evan, Wells, James Fuertas, Derek, and Daniel Maguire) took a ferry ride to Heinz Field for a football date. Ben Roethlisberger, Hines Ward, and Brett Keisel were there. It was teams of 5, with Jordan playing QB the whole time. Shocker. Not sure on the teams or who won.

2 on 1: Alex Woytkiw and Chad Johnson. As we know, they’re both marines, but Alex isn’t a fan of Chad’s. Doesn’t think he acts like a real marine should. I mentioned that something happens with the 2-on-1 this season we haven’t seen before, and this is it. Alex gets the rose meaning Chad gets sent home, but for whatever reason, the guys are partying back at the resort when Alex comes back celebrating that Chad is gone, but the show for whatever reason lets Chad come back to the resort and sees this, and apparently gets in Jordan’s face and hell breaks loose. He started poking Jordan in the face and it got physical. End result is that Chad eventually went home.

Rose Ceremony Eliminations: James Fuertas and Daniel Maguire. Chad Johnson eliminated on his 2-on-1 date.

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12 Comments

12 Comments

  1. rob22

    May 23, 2016 at 12:56 PM

    The sex talk date sounds like the show has a couple of budding serial killers. Forget marriage. The question is whether anyone is murdered during the overnights. Quite an evolution of the show from the origins when people innocently (and naively) came on the show to look for love. Now they just hope that none of them are the next BTK killer.

  2. cyebel

    May 23, 2016 at 2:30 PM

    The sex show sounds waaaay over the top for any Bachelor season. Are they purposefully trying to shut this whole thing down??

  3. cjscjs711

    May 24, 2016 at 8:38 AM

    Have to remember not to be eating dinner when the sex talk date is on

  4. supersparklyday

    May 24, 2016 at 9:56 AM

    Wow! I am super surprised at the scoop ! What another good season it will be. Poor JoJo. Just like Jillian, she.picked a “playah” and the wrong guy. I agree with you, however, that JoJo has “IT” in spades and will never have to flip another house again, if she doesn’t want to. The camera loves her and she can have a solid career, if she plays it right.

    And hey Steve, the JoJo willing to do “F” on Jordan the first night was uncouth and kinda uncalled foe. A loquacious guy like you could found some better words to express yourself. Just trying to help you keep it classy.

  5. mariet

    May 24, 2016 at 11:16 AM

    @supersparklyday–Don’t hold your breath on Steve’s writing. It’s not going to happen. He is the worst writer ever. You would think he could get a neighbor kid or somebody, anybody, to proof his posts. But no, too stubborn, I guess. I cannot read them any longer. I just skim for the spoilers. Why he bothers with the recaps at all is beyond me. There are so many better ones out there.

  6. cjscjs711

    May 24, 2016 at 9:09 PM

    Yes, the recap market has gotten very competitive. But he really is getting sloppy about spelling and grammar; I was going to mention this, too.

  7. kim76

    May 25, 2016 at 9:36 AM

    If you are going to report information on the bachelorette, get your facts right. His name is Jordan Palmer and his brother is Carson Palmer. He played in the NFL for the Cincinnati Bengals and I think Arizona as a backup. So he WAS in the NFL and his last name is NOT Rodgers…… Seems like a nice guy to me. Carson is a great guy, and he comes from the same family. So report correctly, or not at all.

  8. supersparklyday

    May 25, 2016 at 1:16 PM

    No, his name is Jordan Rodgers. Think you’re confusing Jordan with Jesse Palmer. Please don’t drink & post.

  9. pearls

    May 30, 2016 at 5:14 PM

    OH KIM76 YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT. HIS NAME IS JORDAN RODGERS, AND HIS BROTHER IS AARON RODGERS, QUARTERBACK FOR THE GREEN BAY PACKERS. REALITY STEVE IS COMPLETELY, AND TOTALLY CORRECT!

  10. G K

    May 30, 2016 at 8:43 PM

    Kim76, looks like you’re a complete loser. Get your facts straight before you try to correct people.

  11. kelbelle312

    June 1, 2016 at 6:42 PM

    Steve, love the spoilers (as I do every season)! They are the only reason I watch the show, so thank you 🙂 But I have to give this piece of advice… The expression is “I COULDN’T care less,” not “I COULD care less.” If you “COULD” care less, you are implying that you actually DO care a little about Jordan and that there’s a lower level of apathy available for you to reach.

  12. netflixstreamhd

    June 6, 2016 at 11:19 AM

    New! Watch Stream or Download Full HD The Bachelorette – Season 12 Episode 3 “Week 3” Online Already! Visit Here = http://bit.ly/1PASEzR

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