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The Bachelorette 14 - Becca

The “Bachelorette” Becca – Episode 7 Recap & (SPOILER) Some BIP “Couples”

Photo Credit: ABC

-Becca and Colton hop on a catamaran for their date, and whaddya know, they’re at the bow of the boat doing the Leo/Kate pose from “Titanic.” I’m willing to bet that 95% of the 1-on-1 dates in the history of this show that took place on a boat had the couple simulating the iconic scene from Titanic. I feel like we get this every season and it’s quite unoriginal. Can we make a new movie that has an iconic boat scene? Or how about this – how about they re-enact a different scene from Titanic. Like the one where the old lady chucks her jewelry over the edge never to be found again. That’d be pretty compelling. But since they wouldn’t normally be wearing jewelry on the bow of the boat, maybe one time a contestant rips the mic pack off the girl and hurls it overboard causing all the producers to be thrown into a panic. Please. Something different. I’m begging you.

-For the next few minutes, it’s sexual innuendo overload. A lot of talk about conch. A lot. For whatever reason I always thought conch was pronounced the way it’s spelled. Nope. It’s pronounced “conk.” Which is one letter away from being the male genitals, so producers had a field day with this one. Just a bunch of conch talk, they threw in some aphrodisiacs, Bahamian Viagra talk and just went to town. Again, it was clear what producer’s goal was for this date before it even started. It was all centered around Colton’s virginity. The build up to him telling her OF COURSE they were going to make sure the day portion of the date was nothing but sexual innuendos. Becca (before knowing Colton hasn’t put his hot dog in a bun yet): “I don’t think Colton and I need any aphrodisiacs.” Oh honey. You’ll need more than that I’m afraid. Becca is confident heading into the night portion. They made sure we heard her say this: “He would have to drop a great bomb on me for him not to get it (the rose).” 16 years and 36 seasons in now. I hope all of you are starting to see what storyboarding is on this show. It’s not hard to figure out.

-So at dinner, lets have some more sex (kinda) talk.

Becca: “You’re a good conch diver.”
Colton: “I know…right up my alley…suckers were a lot deeper than I thought they’d be…”
Becca: “They’re huge…”
Colton: “And then I pulled it out…it just kept coming…”
Becca: “Ok, we need to stop talking about conch.”

Ya’ think? You sound like a high school senior boys locker room. How about we change the subject before Becca gets all worked up, only to be disappointed. That’s where we’re headed at this point. However, with some very clever editing yet again.

-Colton tells Becca he’s a virgin, and it’s by choice. He’s spent so much time on his football career, that he hasn’t had much time in the relationship department. There’s Football Colton vs Personal Colton. Well, lets call it Practice Squad Colton vs Personal Colton who already made out with your friend. He said very few people know this about him, and he doesn’t think his dad even knows. Well he does now. You do you know this was being recorded and will be televised by millions, right? Becca excuses herself from the table after Colton tells her, and this is where editing had a field day. Of course editing made it seem like she was so put off by Colton’s virginity that she needed time to think about it so she got up and left, when in reality…

Typical. A whole storyline is shown in a completely different light than how it happened on the show. No way! It’s just silly at this point. But thank you to Becca to clearing that up for us, even though while watching it, there was no way it was believable she got up right at that moment to “clear her head.” Please. Follow the storyboard for the episode. Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

-After she comes back, Colton tells her that his virginity isn’t because he’s “not waiting for marriage, I’m waiting for the right heart.” Sounds like a line Jef Holm stole off those Ecards during Emily’s season. And with that, Becca gives him the rose saying “I wanna meet the people who made Colton Underwood.” That’s an awful weird way to put it, no? The people who shaped you. The people who molded you. How you became the man you are today. “The people who made you?” Becca must have so much pent up sexual frustration at this point, she just can’t help herself. I guess I can’t blame her. And oh yeah, back at the hotel, Blake is freaking out because Garrett got date card #2 and he’s one more date card closer to not getting a 1-on-1, which was his storyboard for the episode. Some pretty incessant whining by Blake there about not getting a date since the first one of the season. We get it, you want a date. They all do. Hold your horses. Get it? Horses. Blake. I’ll be here all week. Be sure to tip the wait staff.

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16 Comments

16 Comments

  1. hermoine

    July 10, 2018 at 11:40 AM

    So now that we know Tia goes back to Becca to tell her she still has feelings for Colton, could that be the reason we saw Becca crying on the bed in the couple promo snippets for episodes coming soon? That’s my theory!

  2. adelina

    July 10, 2018 at 12:17 PM

    I am rooting for Blake. Yes he overshared about the divorce details even though I imagine your Mom having an affair with one of your teacher/coaches is pretty unsettling and embarrassing…but, he just seems more genuine than Garrett.

    I also find it odd that Garrett dated his ex-wife for a significant time and then divorced two months later???? Like, you didn’t see ANY of this hothead behavior? And if you did and you rationalized it, fine, but between that and his politically incorrect instagram likes — I just think dude seems idealistic and a little misguided.

    I think he needs to slow his roll and just be single for a while. I don’t see them making it at all – he’s such a ‘yes’ man and like an eager puppy wanting to please Becca.

    Sidenote: could Wills have a more monotone /eyes half closed disposition? Nice guy. Nice sense of style. Flat affect.

  3. rob22

    July 10, 2018 at 12:51 PM

    I’ve really snoozed through this season. Wow, we’re already to hometowns. I’ve really been playing on my phone while my wife watches. In the snippets I’ve watched, there have just been so many uninteresting guys, who aren’t really that interested in Becca. Now that Leo and Wills are gone, that does help. But I’m not buying that Colton gives a rip about Becca. I guess Jason might, but it really doesn’t look like Becca is that into him. That leaves, of course, Blake and Garrett and the pretty obvious two horse race. It’s just taking SUCH a long time to let go of 25 (or whatever it was) guys that were not going to happen. I’ve found this season to be very tedious. I don’t care about any of these guys (yeah, I do like to be happy for the final couple) and their relationship with Becca. And, honestly, it seems like she spends a lot of time weeding out guys who slip up while trying to fake interest in her. Then she spends a day brooding about the latest guy she had to kick to the curb. Then she cancels the cocktail party and gives out roses to a bunch of guys that have no chance. Why did he get the rose? Because look at who’s left. So uninteresting.

  4. GoingBlonde

    July 10, 2018 at 2:32 PM

    Garrett turned me off last night with his little speech about not putting a ring on the finger without having had sex first. This test drive theory is so dumb! If you have attraction and chemistry, then sex will get figured out. Sean and Catherine waited and are doing just fine. I liked Garrett before even despite his recent Instagram scandal. But last night, I was just disgusted with him and Blake.

  5. angelfish

    July 10, 2018 at 2:45 PM

    Sean & Catherine had BOTH already had sex with other people, so they knew what to do and what they liked and how they liked it. HUGE difference than being with somebody that only knows the mechanics. I can’t stand Garrett, but I support his test-drive theory.

  6. shenanigans

    July 10, 2018 at 3:19 PM

    The sad reality about sex: you can have fabulous sex with someone you don’t even like. You can also love someone dearly and not be compatible with them that way. If you marry that person without knowing that, you may spend the rest of your life unhappy with your sex life (one partner will be frustrated, while the other partner will feel put upon). Why ANYONE would risk that by waiting until marriage is beyond me.

    JMO

  7. upmyalley

    July 10, 2018 at 9:22 PM

    I totally agree. No one has any charisma and it’s just been crikets from the start. Very boring.

  8. corn29

    July 11, 2018 at 5:29 AM

    Becca is no different than Andi Dorfman… both got the Bachelorette gig out of sympathy (being wronged by JP and Arie) and because they were portrayed as strong, independent women… then we see the true vapid and shallow person come out.

    Becca’s reaction to Colton being a virgin was completely classless. For Becca being a self styled SJW, why would virginity matter? She’s totally down with all types of people except when it comes to virgins for some reason.

    Becca’s reaction to Garrett not bringing a woman home to the parents since his divorce was ridiculous too… should Garrett said have said something like 5 or 6 women then? Would that have been better.

    Becca has weird personal notions of what normal is.

  9. jlal

    July 11, 2018 at 6:03 AM

    Agree that most of the men on this season are just boring or at least their edits are boring. I wish the show would focus more on developing the personalities of the contestants rather than fabricating drama.

    BTW – Becca did not react bad when Colton shared he was a virgin. Like RS showed, she sent out at the time saying she got up to go to the restroom. She probably didn’t even get up right after he shared, it was just edited that way. Why the show makes a big deal out of people being virgins I don’t know, it is stupid. The show acts like being a virgin is like having a dreaded disease.

    I think Blake will be the next bachelor. It seems they are setting him up for that at least.

    I don’t buy for a minute that Becca and Tia didn’t communicate before, during, and after the show about Colton. I also don’t buy that Tia suddenly realizes she has “feelings” for him. It is all manufactured drama. All of it.

  10. jlal

    July 11, 2018 at 6:10 AM

    As for Wills, Adelina I said something similar in another post. His half mast eyes, monotone voice too sweet voice, etc. just seem disingenuous. Very affected. He continues to remind me of that blond chick from Arie’s season, Krystal! Just looked it up. Anyway, he kind of gives me the creeps. Also, while his style is “interesting” it is so not my cup of tea or what I’d like my man to be wearing.

  11. corn29

    July 11, 2018 at 4:40 PM

    > BTW – Becca did not react bad when Colton shared he was a virgin

    Bull… that tweet from Becca is reactionary to all the negative tweets about it. Becca’s tweet is just as fake as some claim this show’s editing is.

    Becca’s reaction is her reaction and she needs to own it. She didn’t excuse herself to go to the bathroom. She needed to gather her thoughts. Becca does her best thinking when she’s dropping a deuce? LOL Whatever!

    Unless she

  12. jlal

    July 12, 2018 at 3:37 AM

    corn29 – Even Ashley I stated on a show I was watching that there is no way Becca got up right after he told her. It was edited to look that way. She went on to say they probably either told her to walk around or just shot her pacing around and then edited it in too. This show is heavily edited, heavily. Becca didn’t even get up to go to the bathroom right after he told her, they just made it look that way.

    However, from your response the created the story line works so there you go.

  13. ctrealitygirl

    July 12, 2018 at 12:58 PM

    To help settle the question about how Becca handled Colton dropping the V-bomb…today there is an article in People.com where Becca states that she felt she needed some time to process the information as she was about to make a huge decision about who gets hometown dates. SO…why was she tweeting that she merely needed a ladies room break?? Amazing how they change their stories to suit their needs and make themselves look better.

  14. corn29

    July 12, 2018 at 1:44 PM

    Thank-you @ctrealitygirl!

    I just saw the People thing and came here to reply to the people arguing with me about this…

    @jlal. BECCA’S OWN WORDS are, “I needed to gather my thoughts”. That is NOT, I need to use the ladies room.

    Yes, this is at odds with Becca’s own tweet from tuesday — A tweet I mentioned was BS and completely reactionary from all the criticism Becca is getting for being so judgmental.

  15. ctrealitygirl

    July 12, 2018 at 2:08 PM

    You’re most welcome corn29! Besides the People article, I re-watched the scene after reading about Becca tweeting that she simply need to get up to go to the ladies room, and it didn’t appear edited to me. And the whole time he was telling her, her face seemed frozen…no sign of compassion. So, methinks the news did disturb her to some point. Just own up to it!

  16. jenscho

    July 15, 2018 at 1:34 PM

    Sometimes going to the restroom is code for taking a break to gather yourself and your emotions.

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