Posts filed under 'The Bachelor 11 - Brad'
-Never before has a “Bachelor” finale stirred up more emails, debates, hatred, happiness, etc. than this season did. I appreciate all the emails that were sent in yesterday regarding what you thought of the finale. So with that said, I figured after I laid out some final thoughts on everything including last night’s show, I would post almost all of the emails I received yesterday, so all of you could see the reactions from readers to this column. I’m not attaching names to these, so if you emailed me yesterday, don’t worry, your identity is safe. I just figured I’d let the rest of the readers see what people were saying. I mean, lets face it, everyone has an opinion about what happened, so I figured I’d share some of them. In the morning, seemed like the emails were split 50/50. But by mid afternoon, I’d say it was about 75%/25% in favor of Brad. Which is a little odd because if you went on any message boards yesterday, Brad was getting crucified.
-There are so many things that people emailed, posted, talked about in the last 24 hours, I couldn’t possibly cover everything. Just know that after watching last nights show, and going over every possible argument/scenario in my head, I’m still pretty much where I’m at yesterday in regards to Brad. Did he blow me away with his answers last night? Well, no since he really didn’t have any. Did he completely bomb with his answers and make himself look worse? I don’t think so, but I’m probably in the minority in that one. After reading a lot of your emails, I’ve come to the conclusion that the hopeless romantics are the ones that are pissed off at him. Because those people live in a fairy tale land where everything happens for a reason, and there’s some sort of finality to everything. Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but that’s not quite the way life works. If you’re a hopeless romantic, this show’s not for you. You’re going to be thoroughly disappointed every season if you are. This shows basis is about love and relationships, yes. But anyone that’s watched over the last 6 years knows it’s about entertainment first, editing second, and true love and relationships falls in about 50th place in terms of importance. I’ve said it a thousand times, and I’ll say it again: People need to watch this show for its entertainment value only and quit taking everything so seriously.
-This is not real life. This is not how relationships work. This is not a normal way to meet someone. If it was, everyone would be signing up for shows doing this. It’s television. It’s make believe. The producers care much more about ratings and storylines and drama than they do about a couple falling in love. That’s just a bonus if they do. Every single season I honestly have zero interest who the guy picks in the end. That’s why usually in column one in every season, I’m finding as many faults with the Bachelor as possible and trying to make fun of him, because I know essentially where it’s headed in the end. If I actually took this show seriously, my head would explode. Why do I know this? Because I’ve read message boards and received emails from people who do take the show seriously, and for the life of me, I can’t begin to understand it. What does Brad Womack picking DeAnna over Jenni, or vice versa, have anything to do with you and your life? If you went to work yesterday in a bad mood, or pissed off at Brad, or cursing the show, you seriously need to re-evaluate the priorities in your life. Yes, I watch a boatload television. But there isn’t anything I’ve ever seen on TV, especially reality TV, that’ll give me a giant swing of emotion one way or another. Maybe that’s just me. And maybe I’m just the weird one here. I don’t know. But I honestly can’t comprehend some of the stuff I’ve read and seen over the last 24 hours. I’m stunned.
-For the most part, everyone that is anti-Brad now is basically saying they understand that he didn’t necessarily have to propose to one of them, but why did he just out and out dump both of them and not even try to continue to see who he liked best. Fair enough. I think that’s a reasonable question to ask. But don’t be upset when you don’t get a clear answer, which is exactly what Brad gave us last night. I’m serious when I say this, but I think Brad is a little like me in that, I know pretty early in dating someone whether or not I could see myself marrying that person in the future. And that’s with less lavish dates, and under far less initimate settings. The guy got six weeks with Jenni and DeAnna and obviously developed strong feelings for both of them, who wouldn’t? But just because they fell in love with him, I don’t understand why he’s a jerk for not falling in love with them? And he tried to say that at least 10 times last night, but the girls obviously didn’t want to hear it. Of course not. Nobody wants to hear that the person they’re madly in love with doesn’t feel the same. It hurts. It sucks. But you know what? That’s life. It happens. Not everything is black and white. Some things fall into the grey area, and I think that’s where Brad was with them. He liked them a lot, but wasn’t in love. And rather than pick DeAnna and give her false hope, he decided to cut things off at the pass at end it early. I don’t have any problem with it, and I’m in the minority when I say, I applaud him for it. Yes, his reasoning may suck. And yes, his reasoning may not make sense. But its his reasoning. Who are we to tell him how he’s supposed to dump someone and how he’s supposed to feel? The guy had a gut feeling about each girl that it just wasn’t a long term thing, so he ended it. And I can’t fault him for that.
-I’ve gone out with numerous women in 32 years, some for a long time, some for a short time. But just because things ended between me and all of them, do I not think they’re a good person or not think they’d make a great wife someday? Of course not. They just didn’t for me for whatever reason. And frankly, sometimes my reasoning was along the exactly the same lines as Brads - there really wasn’t one. So when I heard Brad complimenting DeAnna about what a great woman she was, and what a special person she was, and how he’d never met anyone like her, but still ended up sending her home, I could relate to it. C’mon, I can’t be the only one who’s dated someone that was a great person, they were attractive, they had the morals and values in a person you were looking for, you guys got along great, but it just didn’t work out for whatever reason. Right? Please tell me I’m not alone in this. What I’m saying is I completely understand where Brad is coming from with all this. It’s happened to me before and there’s really no explanation behind any of it. As was evidenced by what we saw from Brad last night.
-The other argument coming from the anti-Brad camp is that he lead both of the women on, but moreso DeAnna with things he said and did. Let’s just all remember that this is an entertainment show first, which primary goal is to get you to tune in to their show. And to do that, they need to create drama. And they need to create storylines. And they need to create characters. Of course he complimented both girls all the time. Of course he told them things that would make them think they were the ones. Of course he went and bought an engagement ring. What if in the second episode of the season, after any random group date, or solo date, Brad’s talking to the camera saying, “Yeah, I’m not feelin’ it with any of these girls. Not really my type. I really don’t see anything happening with any of them.” Would you have continued to watch? Of course not. It’s not like every single person would tune out, and their ratings would be a zero, but you know what I mean. There’d be no intrigue. There’d be no drama. There’d be no suspense as to who he liked more than others. So yeah, they gotta show him being intimate with girls and complimenting them. That’s what makes the show the show. What if instead of showing him getting an engagement ring on Monday night, they showed him going to the store, then walking out saying, “I can’t do this. It doesn’t feel right.” What would you have thought then? You would’ve thought, “Oh my God, he’s not gonna propose to either of them. They just gave away that he’s not proposing to anyone. What an anti-climatic ending this is.” So of course they showed him getting the ring. They had to. That’s what makes the show the show.
-As for both DeAnna and Jenni still being upset and still feeling like they were led on, even after talking to Brad last night, all I can say is, “Yeah. Pretty much.” I wouldn’t expect them to understand Brad’s reasoning. Most people don’t. And I suspect that some people that were maybe on the fence or even still liked him after the finale, don’t like him now because he couldn’t give each girls any answers really. But why does he have to? It was his decision. Let him live with it. If DeAnna is the greatest woman alive, then someone else will be lucky enough to have her and it’s Brads loss. But something tells me he’s moved on and is past it. Yeah, it bothered him, you could tell. But what else was he supposed to do last night? Start crying and change his mind? Say he wants DeAnna back? That would’ve made him look worse, because then you would’ve asked, “Well why’d you dump her in the first place.” The guy was in a no-win situation last night and handled about as well as he could. Not great, but not terrible. His message last night was essentially repeated a thousand times in so many ways, “I’m sorry for not falling in love with either of you guys.”
-And let’s not forget the most basic aspect of this show. A single man is brought on this show to possibly find his next girlfriend, or even future wife. According to google when I typed in “U.S.A. Poplulation”, as of July of 2007, there are 301 million people living in the United States. And of those 301 million people, some random group of producers on a sleazy TV show have to pick 25 women that might be a good match for their Bachelor. And this Bachelor really has no say in what 25 girls he’d like to choose from. And oh yeah, did I mention this is all for a national television audience to see? So you do the math. What are the odds that he’s going to date, fall in love, or even marry any of those 25? Not good at all. Trista & Ryan? Hey, they made a match. Congratulations. Right place right time. Byron and Mary? Well, until it actually happens, I’ll believe it when I see it. But you get the point. Finding true love on this show is basically pure luck by the casting department. Can it happen? Sure. Is it likely? No.
-So, I can talk til I’m blue in the face about this stuff, and some of you will still hate Brad, and still think his answers suck, and still think he’s a jerk, and that’s fine. I’m not here to change your mind. I’m just here to tell you what I think about what happened. It would be boring if everyone agreed with everyone and no one had opinions on anything. That’s what makes blogging so much fun and why I’ve chosen to write about this show for the last 6 years. Everyone’s dated before, everyone’s been in relationships, and everyone can relate to this show on a certain level. Obviously not having your first dates on national television, but just that awkwardness of first conversations and first kisses and first lays….oops. So that’s why I do what I do. I write to entertain. And what better way to entertain than to watch this crappy ass show that is so far removed from reality, it’s scary. Enjoy the show, have fun with it, but don’t let it consume you for more than it needs to. Please. Do it for Reality Steve. That’s all I ask of you. Continue reading RealitySteve.com, hopefully continue laughing, and let TV just be an escape for you every night to replace the real important matters. Thanks again for reading, Dr. Reality Steve along with “Reality Roundup” returns next week, and enjoy these fine emails you all sent in on Monday’s finale. See you soon….
Braaaaaaavo! Brad Womack is officially my new “favorite” person!!!
He achieved one of the greatest feats of all time on that show – a display of real, true, raw honesty!!! Kudos to him, and the producers!
I was very happy with the way the show ended. Brad’s mother even said that he had never dated two women at the same time before. He appeared to me to have very strong morals and values. I saw it as he outright told DeAnne that he told Jenni good-bye. He also told DeAnna that she was everything he was looking for in a wife and that they both agreed that they only wanted to get married one time and for good. I took the show as he really cares for DeAnna, but he could not go from hanging out with so many girls for all of these weeks and making out with them to then say goodbye to one and hey, let’s get married to the other one. I think he wanted time to make sure he made the absolute right choice. When he was back home, which one did he think about every day and could not stand being without and wanted to call to see if she was OK? He says in the commercials that he found the woman he was looking for. I think we will find out tonight that it is DeAnna, but he just wanted to be sure, which is better than picking one of the two and then by the time the show airs, the relationship is over, which has happened way too many times.
I get a lot of laughs from your column each week. I also can’t wait to see the ATFR tonight. I think Brad was right to do what he did, if his heart wasn’t in it, but I thought he treated DeAnna kind of coldly. He wanted Jenni to talk, because she couldn’t, and he wanted DeAnna to shut up when clearly she had something to say. It’s all about him, him, him.
While I tend to live the fairytale of wanting that happy ending…and
while I believe for both of these women this experience was heart
wrenching, I thought he did a good thing. I am sure that neither
women will bounce back from this that easily but I do think Jenny
might the making of the next bachelorette.
I really liked when he was letting down DeAnna that he came back to
the whole, “when we talked about marriage we both talked about it only
happening once” thing. I think it had to be hard to do…to break up
with both women on national tv…but in his mind as in mine…marriage
to him according to that act he did on the finale is “til death do us
part” and I believe he just didn’t see that with them so why take them
through the false notion of a wedding to come?
Will he ever get married…who knows? But of the women on the show, I
think half of them more than likely were no different from the women
he has encountered at his bars and the other half…while he could
foster a deep like for the others for the amount of time they were
given…he just didn’t see the future of sitting on the porch at 85
with any of them after 40+ years of marriage.
So yeah, this show still draws me in…can make me mad…and for a bit
I was completely speechless but well it just goes to show you that
nothing can make someone love another person…not even national
television.
But for the record…with all that I have said…if I was in their
spot I would be heart-broken I am sure.
You have made some great points, and I guess I am not as mad as I was last night since reading your column.
Hind sight is 20/20. We all should have seen this coming.
But I am still upset he didn’t pick. I still think he would have picked a girl
if he had kept Sheena…And he WOULD still be with her today.
So when he let her go…..it was all over but the hurtin’.
Bravo on last night’s Bachelor recap, loved your take on it. I thought it was a pretty good show too. Up until last night, I had only watched the first two episodes this season and gave up. Although Brad is a nice guy, he had no personality (in my opinion), and if you took “Wow” out of his vocabulary, he would be tongue tied.
Anyway, I did watch last night because I had read some promos saying it was the most “dramatic” FR ever. Well, I would not call it dramatic, but it was interesting and surprising. I did expect a twist at the end, but all along I thought he was the one who was going to get dumped. You know, he proposes and the girl says “thanks, but no thanks”. So the double dumping was shocking, but very honest on his part.
I have to agree that kudos go to ABC for showing this sham even though they knew what a dud it was all season long, and what the ending would be. The show has an abysmal track record, so to expect a happy ending is really silly.
I’ve checked a couple of private message boards I belong to, the opinions are divided about 50/50. Some think he is a jerk, while others think he did the right and proper thing.
Can’t wait for tonight’s show and see if any big revelations take place.
Loved your take on the Bachelor. I agree with everything. I’d rather watch the whole season and see something real happen at the end than to have the same fake ending and the couple is broken up within two weeks. Go Brad!!
First of all, I really like your column and enjoy reading your wise cracking summaries.
As much as I agree with you that at least we finally saw a bachelor not propose just for the sake of it, once again I find myself asking, ‘what the heck was that??’
Amidst rumours of Brad text messaging his ex-girlfriend during the entire taping of the show to rumours of this just being a publicity stunt for his bar, I have to wonder what was real and what was scripted. Ever since Trista accused the producers of manipulating situations to create drama, I have questioned this show.
First off, there’s Brad’s behavior. He seemed to fawn all over both women and told his family he would have a tough time choosing…??? Then he goes ring shopping. Why bother, if you aren’t ‘feeling the love’?
Then there is the way the women reacted. You could see very clearly that Jenni was having a tough time telling Brad that she loved him; I have no doubt now that the producers egged her on and told her to lay it on the line with him. Even Brad’s mom seemed determined to ask both Jenni and Deanna if they were in love. Again I ask, why bother?
Ahh, ratings!!!!
In my opinion, the ending of this season was entirely choreographed to add drama. Rejection is even more of a sting if both women have just professed their love. Poor babies, they got dragged down the garden path just like the rest of us.
Anyway, I will tune in tonight, if for no other reason to see Brad on the hot seat. Liz of zap2it.com summed it up nicely. She said, “Tomorrow night, hopefully, Brad gets his ass kicked. Because that would be completely fair. Valuable lesson, boys and girls. Don’t lead people on.”
WOW - Go Brad…I was impressed as well. As soon as I saw him leave the stage with “DeAhna”, I knew it was over. Her little smile was sad though when he told her he had just said goodbye to Jenni but then in a split second she knew her number was up too. That was sad.
So what is Brad been up to - do you know???? That would be interesting to follow. I can’t believe he would even sign on for an After The Rose show….how awkward. Hope someone check the girls at the door for weapons.
I was happy with the ending. I think no less of Brad. Just because he got on a TV show doesn’t mean he is going to fake his feelings. And kudos to ABC for not spinning it another way which would have pissed me off more.
I have to say Jenni’s reading of her feelings for him made me uncomfortable. The “I will devote my every waking moment to making you happy, just let me up off the floor from being your foot stool and I’ll make you dinner” (my quote, not hers). I would have dropped her right there. But I’m a girl that’s had therapy, so take that for what it’s worth.
Steve, I beg of you one favor. If you do nothing else with all your fame, please spread the word to all potential bachelorettes: if you can’t stop yourself from constantly pulling up your strapless dress then DO NOT WEAR ONE!!! It just shows all of America that you are not comfortable in your wardrobe and we don’t need to see you yanking at the top of your dress all night. Doesn’t look lady-like.
What I do not understand is although he does not love either one of them – did he not feel strongly enough about either one to continue dating one or the other? He seemed to at the minimum like them both – I guess I am confused – it seems like he led them on – to at least believe he would date one after the show.
My opinion is that he simply does not want to commit to any women. He is 35 and single – obviously he does not want a girlfriend or wife. I wonder when he discovered that he did not even want to continue dating either woman.
I like him as well– but I feel as if he should have never pretended that he really wanted to find a wife.
You’ve got to respect a guy who knows his own worth and refuses to compromise when making such a life-altering decision. Plus, he’s had weeks of free commercial time for “Bachelor Brad.” Can you imagine the number of babes lined up outside his clubs, waiting for their opportunity to show our self-made millionaire that they have the right stuff to be Mrs. Womack and bear his children???? Now he can conducts his dates in private and hopefully find a woman who meets his high standards. In the meantime, he’ll be having one heck of a good time –I hope he’s not allergic to silicone….!
STEVE!!!!! Yeah, I’m weighing in. To be perfectly honest, I called it a little over a week ago…but I was still shocked when it happened. I saw him send Jenni home and then here comes Deanna and I swear I thought he was going to fall over. For whatever reason, this finale really bothered me. THANK GOD he was honest. I am so sick of these pansy ass men wasting 2 million dollar engagement rings on women they won’t see after the finale airs. But at the end of this I sat there thinking, couldn’t he have at least asked one of them to date? Or go ala what’s his name and ask them BOTH to date (that was priceless by the way. I wondered when he became a Mormon). And then, that pathetic little shot of him sitting on the altar, holding the ring…god, it was actually heart wrenching. I can’t say I’ll never watch again, but I always thought the greatest thing about this show wasn’t who he picked, but how much publicity their break up got!! And then the public is right back to another season.
In short, my darling Steve, I was shocked, but not really disappointed and I will look forward to watching the ATFR tonight. Who knows what will happen, but with 2 hours to explain, this should be a good one.
I always enjoy your take on this show, and I was glad to see that someone else agrees with me. I also don’t read spoilers, so I had no clue what was coming. After you said that DeAnna was in a picture from Halloween on his MySpace page, I really thought I knew the outcome. Why do I watch this show if I know the entire concept is ludicrous? I have no idea. I just know that after last night I am VERY eager for tonight’s reunion.
So, you are not the only person that was happy with last night’s outcome. He seemed like he honestly LIKED both girls, but the obvious nerves he was having after DeAnna walked out…that was such a red flag. I’m sure everyone gets a little nervous before they propose, but come on, he looked like he was about to have a panic attack. I’m glad he went with his instincts and did what probably ever other Bachelor should have done. I can’t wait to see your comments about tonight’s episode.
I just read your column on the Bachelor Finale and I’m right there with ya! I suspected that this would happen since from the very start, Brad has been “different” from all other bachelors. He never said he was in love, there was no hint of a proposal and he gave very few interviews. I thought he really “liked” both girls but I couldn’t picture him long term with either. Evidently he couldn’t either. I don’t blame him at all for not leading anyone on and promising something he couldn’t deliver. Good for him. Of course it was quite painful to watch Jenny and DeAnna getting their hearts broken, but they knew that was a possibility going into this. Brad is going to get a lot of flack, for sure, and can’t wait to see what transpires this evening on the AFTR show. Thanks for writing what I was thinking.
OK, to the final rose ceremony. It was completely and totally the best one ever, although the one where the girl has to stop the limo on the side of the road to upchuck was pretty entertaining! I say it all the time “do these women and men actually think it is true love in 6 weeks?” How can you be ok with the fact that your man is messing around with another woman and stringing her along also. I was so proud of Brad until they showed him sitting there crying. Suck it up, be a man! you are not getting any of those two anymore no matter how sad you looked but I am sure you will be really popular at the bar tonight.
I never heard Brad say anything stronger than I really “care” about this or that girl. Isn’t that like the “friend” card. Yeah he couldn’t keep his hands off Jenni so what. She was all over him too.
I was hoping that Deanna was going to tear him a new one. She looked like she was ready to beat the crap out of our bachelor. Oh well maybe tonight.
I actually believe in love but not from a 6 week reality show. Although there are a few exceptions but this of course is not the norm. So thank you abc for giving us someone who actually realized they do not have to pick someone they know they will break up with in the near future.
Loved your round up. Loved the finale too, I also said we finally found a guy who had the ball’s to do what he wants to do and not what he’s expected to do. I’m going to be watching the AFTR tonight too just to see how he gets out of this one. Made my day, when my husband came to bed last night, I was laughing my ass off, he wanted to know. My comment:
“OMG He didn’t choose anyone, he dumped both of them, now that’s a first.” Hubs said, Brad is my hero!!!! LOL.
I can’t believe I am responding to this but then I can’t believe I have followed this show this closely this season either as I normally don’t watch it. 
Anyway, I think your article is GREAT!! and you have totally hit ‘the nail on the head”. I totally agree with you!!
You are absolutely right. He is a standup guy. Since I live in Wichita, of course I was disappointed that Jenni didn’t get her man. You have to give Brad kudos for doing the right thing.
I think this has happened before though. Remember Mr. Firestone? He and Jenny Scheft split and she was back as The Bachelorette. She didn’t pick either. In fact, didn’t she wait until after the final episode aired and then they had a now-is-the-time kinda show when she said they were just friends?
I agree with your take on the finale and on Brad as a
bachelor - I would actually be really surprised if
most people didn’t agree with you. It was so
refreshing to see someone be authentic on this show. I
thought it was really brave of him and I would TOTALLY
watch another Brad Bachelor! Are you kidding? He’s the
best one they’ve ever had!
I agree with you 100% about Brad’s decision.
I have watched most seasons of The Bachelor and will admit
that I wished for more “reality” from this show. Who
porposes to someone after 6 weeks of dating while dating
other girls and being supervised and prepped by producers?
But I do get that you could find someone you would want to
explore a relationship with in the “real” world. I also get
that you could meet 25 people and not find one that you
would want to explore that with.
My problem with Brad is that I think this was his plan from
the start. He has said that he watched many seasons of the
Bachelor and I think that he decided he would be the one to
give it “reality” and go on and pick no one. His friends
are already talking about what a hard decision this was for
him and spilling all kinds of details about it…a little
hard if they just found out last night. I think this was a
decision he made before he signed up to do the show.
I get why that would still leave Brad in your “Top Bachelor”
spot. But as a woman who has been “lead on” in the
past I see it as a jerky, hurtful thing to do to two great
women.
Ok, I agree with you in that at least Brad did not lead them on only to dump them later. Yep, give him credit for that. My problem is that he really did lead them on. Especially all he said to Deanna — who by the way was NOT my favorite. He told her things and talked with her about things that would lead her to believe it was her. I know ABC has him say or do certain things, but come on.
I will say this, of the two ‘dumpees’ I thought Jenni was much sweeter about the whole thing. Deanna on the other hand, just flat out got mad. Not that I blame her, but I am surprised she even let him hold her hand after that dumping!
It was a weird ending and I am looking forward to see what happens on the ATFR. Some are saying he will come back and propose on that. I don’t know, he seemed to know what he was doing and to propose on that show would be almost worse than the dumping he did last nite. JMHO.
Best finale ever, best bachelor ever!
I can’t wait for him trying to explain why he didn’t fall in love with that look on his face like “all these people are looney!”
Anyway, as for my comment on this season and the finale..I have to say I have totally agreed with you through the whole thing. I thought Brad was the most honest and sincere guy ever. He really seems to be genuinely nice. When you couldn’t come up with anything bad to say about him I thought the same thing. I tried to find something wrong with him but just couldn’t. In the finale, there were several clues that something wasn’t going to be what we expected. First, it was the announcement that it was going to be the most shocking or unexpected ending in history. At first I thought since most people thought he’d pick Deanna that maybe he’d pick Jenny, then I thought maybe he’d pick Jenny and she’d turn him down. Although I didn’t expect him to not choose either, I thought it was a good thing. He did say to his brother that when he was with one girl, he thought about the other and vice versa, so I thought he sounded like he really didn’t have strong enough feelings for either one in particular because if he really felt ‘in love’ feelings he’d have known. And like you said, it was really honest of him to not choose either if it wasn’t there for him. Brave move on his part but that just showed he is for real. I felt kind of bad for the girls, not really Jenny who I do believe was only in it for her resume, but more for Deanna, but would she rather be picked just because it was down to one or the other when he didn’t really love either? I’d rather know at the moment then wait months to get dumped. Anyway,I may be in the minority but I thought he did the right thing. I even said to my son when Brad walked off the podium that he wasn’t going to pick her either and thought it was a good thing, that he didn’t just settle just because he had to for the show. And I also said something you said which was that they should give him another 25 girls and see if he can find someone in that group….why not? He is obviously single for a reason, because he can’t find that special someone and just because the show picked 25 didn’t mean any of them have to be the one he wanted, so let him try again. He obviously is truly looking for “the one” whether that is possible or not is another thing but he thinks so. Anyway, I think he’s terrific and hope he does find someone someday. I can’t wait until the “after the rose” show and look forward to your comments. Thanks for writing such a great column and I look forward to continue reading it in the future.
I knew you felt like that. That was the best ever. He pulled a better one than Jenn Schiff. I wonder what ramifications this has for the future of the show though. I don’t see how abc can save face with this one. Bottom line he wasn’t in love. I thought he had a strange look on his face when Deedee was giving her last sales pitch desperation speech about how much she wanted to be with him. He had a “You are about to get dumped” look on his face so I was surprised when he dumped Jenni and thought he was going to pick her. I wonder why he went out and bought a ring though. Is that mandatory? I hope you write something tomorrow. I mean tonight will be amazing listening to these women rake him over for not picking them and telling him what a mistake he made. Yeah, that is always convincing. Good for Brad! Jenni was shallow and DeeDee just wasn’t good enough for him. Bottom line. I loved it!
Never read your blog/column before but I guess I should have all season; every season. You’re terrific!
I was totally shocked that both women were dumped because I am one of those women who still believe in the happily ever after (why I don’t know - been divorced 20 years!) lol
But the part about Brad texting his old girlfriend. What’s that all about? Maybe he should have fessed up? Where’s the honesty in that? More reality would have been to include the old girlfriend in the show.
When Brad started doing his circling of the wagons I thought he was going to say to Deanna that he made a mistake sending Jenni home. Now that would have been a REAL SURPRISE ENDING.
And how many of the former bachelors did actually get married? Only a few, right? Ryan and Trista take the cake. And isn’t Prince Borghase now dating the runner up; the virgin?
Reality check -Yes you can get married after 6 weeks. I did. Met in August, was proposed to in September, and married in October. It lasted 19 years - 2 great children - and now 6 grandchildren.
I will be watching next season.
It would be nice to have another Bachelorette or bring back the show with the people my age who were dating and had kids.
Amen! Yeah for honesty!!!!
I think you are being naive and let me tell you why…Let’s talk Brad for a second. What do we know about him?
1) He is a self-made millionaire.
2) He has a bunch of bars and now wants to expand/do other ventures.
3) He was repeatedly named “the sexiest bachelor ever”.
4) He wants to get married only once.
5) He has an identical twin brother (women love that.)
Just from knowing those 5 things do you honestly believe the guy needs a TV show to find a wife? P-lease. He is a businessman. He was there to get some free publicity, not to find his future spouse. I am sure he was open to the possibility of finding one, but it was not his main objective. When you feel that marriage is sacred and you only want to do it once, you would never try finding a wife on a TV show among 25 contestants that someone else pre-selects for you. When you are THAT serious about it, you’ll try to have as many options as possible and not go for the attention-whore types. Just my two cents..
I agree. Finally, someone who was honest and didn’t string someone along. I think Brad really wanted to find someone, but these weren’t the girls. Yes, the girls got hurt, but that is the chance they take going into the show. I thought it was great and I can’t wait to see tonight’s show.
I was shocked last night when Brad dumped BOTH girls and I thought Brad was a jerk for doing that. See, I don’t mind that these desperados, go on a show on national television to find “love.” I know that they won’t work out in the end, even if there is a declaration of love, but, I still like the romance of it all. After reading your column, however, I can see the other side. I guess Brad was truly following his heart when he told both girls that he just wasn’t feelin it. I did enjoy the drama of it all.
I enjoyed the “double dumping.” Finally (like you said)–a man willing to admit he’s not in love with some woman who signed up to be on a television show. In my opinion, the two final girls looked ridiculous the way they both professed their love for him after a few weeks of “dating” him. Hopefully Brad will go on to find someone who isn’t interested in speed dating and short-lived engagements.
I’m in total agreement with you. Made me like Brad even more for not caving into the pressure to propose.
I agree, that was the best finale ever! Finally, a bachelor that was honest instead of stringing them on for a few more months… I would soooo watch another season with Brad! Let him have 25 more to choose from, it’s only fair! ha ha..
I’m with you, Brad seemed like a decent guy all along and last night sealed it. He looked like he actually hated having to tell DeAnna. I liked that we weren’t led to believe that it would all work out when he didn’t believe it. Thanks ABC for a little reeality on a reality show for a change.
The Bachelor Links
November 21st, 2007
-That was AWESOME. Best finale ever. Brad Womack is
my new hero. Finally, FINALLY, a Bachelor that told
us the truth. Finally a Bachelor that didn’t try to
convince not only the viewing audience, but himself as
well, that he actually fell madly in love with someone
in 6 weeks on a TV show. Finally a Bachelor that
actually had the balls to tell each girl essentially,
“Look, I like you a lot, I’ve invested a lot of time
in getting to know you, but I’m sorry, I don’t love
you and I ain’t gonna sit here and pretend I do just
so ABC has a happy ending.” Good for him. You know
what I think? I think Brad should be the Bachelor
next season as well so we can find this fine young
gentleman a wife. Judging by all past columns this
season, you could tell I was never really hard on Brad
because he actually came across as someone that wasn’t
intereted in fame or prestige out of this. But if I
ever did happen to say anything bad about the guy, I
take it back. He’s the greatest. Bring him back,
ABC. I can handle back to back seasons of Brad
because at least I know he’s honest.
-I’m sure there are a lot of hopeless romantics out
there that are disappointed in the finale and think
Brad is a jerk now, but let me ask you this: Can you
imagine if they had the long, drawn out 2 hour
finale, each girl flying home to his hometown to meet
his family, watching him take more than 10 seconds to
pick out the ring, on and on and on and on, and then
he dumped both of them? You people would’ve been even
more livid than you are now. The fact that this
season was never about hyping up the finale, or
teasing us with “The most romantic finale ever”, or
“Will he propose/Will she accept?” promos, kind of
gave it away that something like this would happen,
didn’t it? I mean, c’mon, you had to see this coming.
I’m glad they did it this
way. The brevity of it gave away the ending pretty
much, but still, I’d rather see the guy dump both
girls, then give the ol’ “This is a promise
ring….let’s see where this goes…” line only to
have
them break up in a month.
-The “double dumping”, as I’d like to call it, was
clearly in the making as evidenced by two things
imparticular:
1) The finale was only an hour long. They’ve NEVER
done this before. Ever. And you know what? Good for
them. Two hours of that fluff to watch him sh** can
both girls would’ve been a giant letdown. I
mean, each girl meeting his mom and brothers lasted no
more than 5 minutes. They made 15 minute segments out
of that in the past. He shopped for the ring for 10
seconds, when usually, that takes a whole segment.
They knew obviously since they ended taping the show
what the final result was. So why try and hype it up
all season and mislead us into thinking something good
might happen? You gotta admit, the ABC hype machine
surrounding what could possibly happen at the end was
pretty low. We never heard ANY of that stuff they
used to promote in the past. Hell, last season, from
episode one, they were promoting that there was a
proposal. So you gotta give them credit for their
work this season. Perfect ABC. You finally did
something right.
2) When Brad practically dry heaved before dumping
DeAnna. Yeah, she probably felt really good after he
walked away from her right on the “altar”. Awesome.
Loved every minute of it. In fact, I think I wanna go
watch that ending again. Seriously.
-Now, I didn’t read any spoilers and I had no idea
this was coming, but one thing really stuck out to me
since the “Women Tell All” episode last week. Did you
notice that Brad never gave the “I can’t wait to see
her. It’s been so long. It’s been very hard being
away from her” line like all past Bachelors do. He
just said, “I’m happy with my decision.” I heard him
say the same exact thing on a radio interview. So
looking back on it now, it all makes perfect sense.
Every Bachelor in the past has always talked about how
excited he was to see who he chose again, they talk
all the time, yada yada yada. And when Brad never
said last week how excited he was to see “her”, I
figured something was up. And oh yeah, those rumors
that Brad was calling and texting his ex-girlfriend
during filming saying he wasn’t into any of these
girls? Ummmm…guess that wasn’t so far fetched.
-I hope a lot of you aren’t getting the impression
that I’m jaded or that I’m evil, or that I pray for
relationships to fail. I don’t. Not at all. I’m
just elated that finally some Bachelor had the balls
to say, “Look, I’m sorry. The 25 women you chose for
me? Not good enough. I think I can do better.” And
that’s essentially what he did. For those of you who
are disappointed/letdown/pissed/bothered by the
finale, let me ask you this: Would you rather Brad
have chosen one of them knowing he wasn’t in love with
her, only to break up with them in a month or two? If
that happened, you know what your reaction would’ve
been? “Yeah, that’s a real shocker. I can’t believe
I wasted another season watching this show. It never
works out. This show sucks. Blah blah blah…”
-Now we get a Bachelor who dumps both women and I’m
sure the majority of the fans reaction is, “What a
jerk. Why’d we even watch if he wasn’t going pick
one? They misled us.” So he’s damned if he does, and
damned if he doesn’t. I don’t know, maybe I’m in the
minority, but I can honestly say I was more satisfied
with that finale than any other finale this show’s
ever had. Why? Because it was the most real. And
that’s all I ask for. I hate phoniness, and we’ve
pretty much been subjected to fourteen seasons of it
outside of a couple.
-You know what this finale does do, though? Makes
tonights “After the Final Rose” show about as
interesting as they’ve ever had. I’m telling you, I’m
still not even sure what his reasoning was for
dropping both chicks. But it’ll sure be fun to watch
him try to explain again tonight. This’ll be the
first time in the show’s history that the “After the
Final Rose” show was better than the finale. Can’t
wait. I’ll definitely be back tomorrow with a comment
or two on the show.
-So even though we didn’t get a proposal, or even a
promise ring, I feel rejuvenated to know that ABC is
actually willing to go through with a season even if
the Bachelor doesn’t choose anyone. So now we at
least know that there’s a chance of this happening
again. I guess it never crossed our mind that this
could happen since it never did. But hey, I’d much
rather get this ending then all the B.S. ones from the
past where someone gets a one-way ticket, or a promise
ring, and 2 months later, they’re done. Yay Bachelor.
You’ve now moved into my top 50 of favorite shows of
all time.
-So I’ll be back tomorrow with some comments on the
“After the Final Rose” show. Probably won’t be much.
And maybe I’ll respond to a couple of “That finale was
bullsh**” emails that I’m sure I’ll be getting. So
I’d really like to get a read on what you guys thought
of the finale. Are you disappointed you watched all
season only to get the “double dumping”, or do you
like Brad more now because he was honest? I’m curious
to know your thoughts. Get your emails in today at
steve@realitysteve.com, so I can relay the “results”
in tomorrow’s column.
-And due to the fact that I’m vacationing right now in
California with family, and I’ve been running around
like my heads chopped off since Friday, I’ve postponed
Dr. Reality Steve a week. It will definitely be back
next week along with the return of “Reality Roundup”.
I’ve really gotta talk about what’s been going on
elsewhere in the world of reality TV. Lotta good
stuff right now. Ok, time to go to bed. Until
tomorrow….
The Bachelor Links
November 20th, 2007
-As loyal followers of this column know, I have written an episode recap of every single “Bachelor/ette” season, except for “Bachelor” 1 & 2. And I never did those because I didn’t see them. And the “Women Tell All” episode is one I’ve always covered, albeit a much shorter column, because there’s never really anything new in it. Much the same last night. However, for whatever reason, last nights show had absolutely NOTHING in it that was worth writing about. Did it? Did I miss something? Other than Bettina seeming like she was pissed to be there all night and even her being surprised that Brad gave her rose, there wasn’t anything I learned last night that I didn’t already know or read online. Very disappointing. So I’m gonna make this column short and sweet before I head out to play a little golf this morning.
-Hillary did mention that she thought Brad was “hotter than David Beckham.” Look, I’m comfortable enough with my own sexuality to admit when a guy is good looking, and yes, Beck is an attractive guy. Too bad he talks like a weenie. Ever heard him speak? Yes, I know he’s from England and they all sound like that, but for some reason, his voice doesn’t match his appearance. Sorry. Maybe that’s just me, but I’d prefer it if he didn’t sound like a girl. Be a man. Go get yourself a deep voice. You know, like me. I feel like he should be performing opera and is really big into theater. And I’m sure this opinion will be disagreed upon by every female reading this, but that’s ok. Just stating the truth. He sounds like a little priss. Grow a pair, Becks. And stay away from that crazy Cruise/Holmes twosome. Tell them youre not interested in their whack ass religion and you’d rather continue enjoying life the way it is married to that Fembot you’re married too. Don’t get me started on her. There’s two Spice Girls I’d take before her. Yuck.
-The show was in rare form last night was their hatchet editing job. The WTA episode is almost unwatchable once they chop up all the answers, and one second the crowd is clapping or laughing and then the next shot it’s come to a complete stop. Same ol’, same ol’ last night. And shame on the producers for not giving Realitysteve.coms own Michele Leavy any airtime. Are you kidding me? You couldn’t give her a couple minutes to talk about her giant tumble down the stairs? Instead you had to give some time to a contrived cat fight between McCarten and other girls? That was terrible. Michele had a good story to tell. And I’m sure she would’ve given Realitysteve.com a nice plug on national television. Or not. Whatever the case, why even invite her to the show if the only word we get to hear her speak is “Jenni”? There were 10 girls there last night. Every single one of them spoke more than her. I’m sure she had plenty to say about The Tumble, but was edited out. Damn them. That sucked. Just bring her back as the next Bachelorette and all will be forgiven in my book.
-For those that were curious, no, I did not attend the “Women Tell All” tapings. I got my dates mixed up. I don’t leave for L.A. until this Friday. Got some big happenings next week. My nephews baptism, taking my niece to the movies to see some flick Dustin Hoffman is in that I’ve never heard of (Yes, she already saw the “Bee” movie), Turkey Bowl on Thanksgiving morning with all the boys (I’m quite sure my team will completely steamroll Sauce’s gang of misfits that he brings), and believe it or not, I have meeting on Saturday night with Jayanna from “Age of Love”. Meeting is a good word. Maybe I’ll tell you about it next week. Or not. I have no idea what we’re doing or where we’re going, but I’m sure it will be fun. Hey, maybe I’ll take some pictures to put up on the site or the MySpace page. Oh wait. I don’t own a camera. Forget it.
-Oh yeah, Brad told Hillary last night, “I think more highly of you than you know.” He does? Really? I have a question: Why? You were impressed by the fact she lost it on national television for all of the world to see? I think last night was his chance to tell her that since it’s the first time he could respond to her drunken sailor-like sexual fantasy of him. It was fun seeing that again. I was hoping they’d show more, but it was pretty much the same as what we saw during the season. Her talking about him ravaging her, ripping her clothes off, bending her over, and slapping her ass. Quite classy. And hot I might add. I’m telling you, I know you don’t believe me, but I like Sillary. Other than that awful dress she wore the night of her elimination that restricted blood flow throughout her body and pushed her boobs up under her chin, she’s all right in my book. So she cries a lot. All women cry a lot. Especially during that time of month. Over nothing. I don’t pretend to understand what it’s like to turn into a monster once a month, but I’ll just say thank God we don’t have to.
-So yeah, that’s all I got for last night. I’m telling you, there was nothing. If you saw the show, it really wasn’t anything we hadn’t seen or heard yet. If you didn’t see it, well, you didn’t miss much. Nothing revealing came out of it at all. Oh yeah, Bettina said she was turned off by Brad when he went on the defensive. Big deal. Bettina looked none too happy to be there last night. None of the girls seemed to like her and I don’t think she smiled once all night. I probably wouldn’t either if I had to re-live my parents raking Brad through the coals again. And finding out that no one likes you. Sucks to be her. I’m sure she’ll get through it. She lives in Hermosa Beach for pete’s sake. You telling me she can’t find anyone down there. Hell, Sheena’s met someone since the show ended (allegedly) and he’s already posting corny videos of the two of them on You Tube. Even I was able to pull in Hermosa one night, and that’s saying a lot. Bettina, I’m telling you, there are plenty of Grade A douchebags on Pier St. you could saddle up with on any night of the week. And they won’t think because you’re divorced you’re like a used car. In fact, it’ll probably be a turn on. Trust me on this.
-Ok, that’s it. As I said, next week I will be vacationing in L.A. and having to watch the finale there. Since the finale recap usually isn’t as long as other columns, expect more of the same next week. Too many other things going on to care, and I really don’t feel like re-capping a 2 hour show. Dr. Reality Steve will return next week because, well, I had no one to be guest columnist this week. But I found someone for next week that I have quite an interesting history with. Until then….
The Bachelor Links
November 13th, 2007
UPDATE: I APOLOGIZE FOR THE TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES. THEY’RE COMPLETELY OUT OF MY HANDS. BLOGGER HAS BEEN SCREWY ALL DAY. THIS WAS DONE AT 9:00AM THIS MORNING, TOOK ABOUT TWO HOURS BEFORE BLOGGER WOULD LET ME POST IT, AND ITS BASICALLY BEEN APPEARING AND DISAPPEARING ALL DAY FOR NO REASON. DON’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
-Only one Bachelor related note to start with. Sheena admitted in all of her post-Bachelor interviews that Josh is in fact her boyfriend. She claims to have met him after she got back from filming. Whoa, wait a minute. If that’s true, then they must spend every living breathing second together for him to have that many pictures and videos of each other. I mean, filming ended in August and it’s barely November. In 3 months they’ve done that much stuff together? Do they finish each others sentences too? Have they been surgically removed from the hip? Isn’t that a tad unhealthy to be spending every waking moment with someone you just met? Something tells me these two were an item before she went on the show. But if that’s the case, then I’d be pissed if I were him based on some of the things she said about being so head over heels for Brad, and “I’ve never felt this way about anyone”, and “I really, really, really, really cared for that man”. Ouch. Dump her, Josh. She’s playing you.
-Anyone that has read this site long enough knows that I’ve never been one talk about specifics in my dating life. There are two reasons behind that. First, it’s really none of your business. And secondly, I don’t think you care. So I’ve never once talked about past relationships in detail on this site, nor will I in the future. And trust me, I’ve got tons to tell with some of the crazies I’ve come across. However, with my ex-girlfriend Jessica being this weeks guest columnist on Dr. Reality Steve, I figured you can at least know a little about her. The column will be up tomorrow so check back to see if she has anything nice to say about me. Jessica is the only girl I’ve ever lived with, she’s a great cook, she turned me on to Neil Diamond, I turned her on to “24″ and The Coop, and her and I have been broken up for almost 4 years now. There. That’s what you get. In all seriousness, there were definitely some rough times after the breakup, but we’ve both moved on, and I’m glad we’ve been able to put the past behind us and remain friends. And I thank her for being our guest columnist this week. I’m gonna go get a Kleenex now.
-How great was that to have a 45 minute episode last night? It seemed like it was about ten minutes long. It was more like speed dating. I know absolutely nothing about these women, nor do I care to. Any deep rooted bonds Brad has built with any of these women was never showed to us, I have no idea what his real feelings are towards anyone, and this is about the most apathetic season they’ve ever had. I mean, I think its pretty obvious who he’s going to choose, but do you really sense he’s developed any sort of deep, undying love for her? Didn’t think so. So let’s just be happy another season of this mess is almost over and we can start making fun of another failed relationship. It’s only a matter of time before the track record of the “Bachelor” becomes 1-for-11. Woo hoo!!!!
-All three dates were in Cabo which could’ve made for some really entertaining television if ABC had any sort of creativity. But since they don’t and the show was over the minute I sat down to watch it, it was quite uneventful if you ask me. Let’s take for instance Jenni and Brads date with the dolphins. I thought a lot more camera time should’ve been given to Jenni’s cheetah patterned bikini. Like, these are things the show needs to focus on. Not whether or not she can dance with a dolphin. Or that she can straddle a dolphin and swim around in a pool with it. Tell us more about the bikini. What size is it? Where did she get it? Are cheetah and leopard patterns very much a part of her undergarment collection? What’s the easiest way to remove it? Are we supposed to believe she’s not a freak in bed after seeing her wearing that? Oh yeah, yet another theory I have backed up by no empirical evidence whatsoever: Chicks who wear anything with animal print in it like to have sex. And if you do that while also wearing loopy earrings, you might as well just call yourself a prostitute. This theory should never be challenged.
-Dolphins are cute. I like dolphins. Can’t say I’ve ever swam with them, but I think its something I’ll do someday. And most importantly, Hayden Panettiere likes dolphins too. That’s key. You see, if she didn’t like them, I wouldn’t give a crap. But after seeing last week that she does, it makes me like them more. I’m nerdy like that. Anyway, I’ve always been fascinated by dolphins. Whether it was from watching “Flipper” when I was a kid, or Ace Ventura trying to save “Snowflake”, or Jaws 3 when those dolphins kept avoiding getting eaten alive by the Great White which happened to be swimming around Sea World somehow, I’ve always liked them. However, one thing about them freaks me out and that’s their blowhole. In fact, anything that has a blowhole would freak me out since I never know when, why, or what would cause that thing to go off. So I like dolphins, but they kinda give me the willies. Let me rethink if I ever want to go swimming with them. And oh yeah, don’t throw your six pack of 7up wrapper in the ocean. It gets stuck around their nose or something. What a myth that is. Have you looked at the circumference of one of those wrappers and measure it against the size of a dolphins nose? Please. It’s not even close. But whatever. Save the Dolphins. This has been a public service announcement paid for by RealitySteve.com.
-After swimming with Flipper, it’s time for Jenni and Brad’s nighttime date. Apparently the producers thought it would be nice to dress brad in ugliest lime green shirt Cabo had to offer. But what does he care, it’ll be on his floor by the time the door closes behind he and Jenni when they get to the Fantasy Suite. You don’t believe me? Check this line out. Brad: “It goes without saying I’d love to be able to spend the night with her and get to know her in that way. I don’t know how she’ll react.” Get to know her in “that” way, huh? And what would “that” way be? On an intellectual level? Conversational level? Or more like…..uhhhhhh….how do the kids say it nowadays……oh, I got it…..the doggie style way? Can’t believe that slipped my mind. Brad’s actually curious how Jenni will react to the Fantasy Suite invitation? Well, considering there’s been now 14 seasons of the Bachelor/Bachelorette combined, and I believe only 2 people have ever turned down the Fantasy Suite, I’m guessing his odds of getting laid are very good. And most importantly, lets not forget the fact she just wore a cheetah patterned bikini all day. Brad could have a third nipple and she’s still giving it up tonight. No worries Bradley.
-Brad can’t control his horniness. “This date has been on my mind since I first saw you. I mean, since I first talked to you.” Yeah, sure he hasn’t been thinking of tapping that since the night she walked out of the limo. Guys are so easy to read, its pathetic. Southern gentlemen, Smothern gentlemen. He’s no different than any of the rest of them. Thinking with the wrong head. The only thing he was able to do was not make it completely obvious until the 6th episode. Whereas Bob Guiney, who never had girls even like him before he came on the show, was pitching his tent in the first episode when a limo full of girls was chanting his name. I want you to reflect for just a moment on the history of this Bachelor series and realize that Bob Freakin’ Guiney was once the “Bachelor”. I’m gonna go puke right now.
-And if you thought Brad was horny tonight, Jenni is equally as giddy as him. Jenni: “I care for you a lot. It’s very hard for me to say it. It’s so much easier to show it.” Geez, I mean why don’t you just be naked at dinner already and just get it over with. Could these twos attraction be any more physical? All she does is giggle and smile, and all he does is fawn over what a hot body she has and how he’s going to jump her tonight. I don’t know if these two have ever talked about anything else other than her dancing and crazy grandma. Does he even know she did Home Depot commercials or was a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader? Or that she was one of Diddy’s dancers at the VMA’s? Does it even matter at this point? He’ll knock the bottom out of her in Cabo and that’ll be that. And Jenni is counting the seconds until he does. She basically asks him where the Fantasy Suite invitation is, hints that its in his pocket, the sexual tension is about as high as it can get right now, and when she finally gets the card, they don’t even read it and go straight to the room. Uh huh. Bow-chicka-bow-bow.
-Bettina meets Brad on a boat and he explains to her that this boat was once used in an America’s Cup race. Her expression was priceless. It was like someone shined a bright light in her face. He might as well have tried to explain to her the Cover 2 defense, or maybe the Theory of Relativity. 99% of America probably doesn’t know what the America’s Cup is, and I’m guessing Bettina is in that group. But hey, you never know, she could be huge into the once a year sailing race that barely gets any coverage. What does she care anyway where the boat is from, as long as Brad is on it with his shirt off, she’s happy. “I’m so attracted to him, so into him, so everything.” I think that shows her level of interest in him is purely physical. When are men going to stop being looked at as just sex objects? It’s just flat out wrong. I’m sure Brad is not thrilled about being objectified in these episodes by crazy, horny women. It’s disgusting really. Keep your pants on, Bettina.
-B & B get some alone time to discuss that wonderful hometown date of theirs where Brad got to meet the family from hell. Bettina tries to convince Brad her family wasn’t all that bad. “My familys only concern was whether you were into me.” Brad essentially called bullsh** on this one, but kept his cool. He felt like he was doubted, he felt like they didn’t think he was sincere, yada, yada, yada. The conversation essentially went nowhere. Brad didn’t believe her, she thinks her dad should win Father of the Year, let’s move on. For some reason, Brad decides to bring up the possibility of her moving out to Austin if he picks her. Bettina says it’s a no-brainer and that she would in a second. Well of course she said that. Saying, “Nah, I think I’m good where I’m at. We can talk on the phone a lot and see each other once a month. Or maybe every other month” pretty much sealed her fate. Her fate was sealed anyway after pops embarrassed the guy publicly on national television, so I think she was just trying to save face. Just go put your bikini on, hop in the Jacuzzi, and try and get some before he sends you home.
-Nothing was going right at dinner, so Brad busts out the Fantasy Suite card. “Brad and Bettina, should you choose to forgo your individual rooms, please use this key to spend the night as a couple in the fantasy suite. Chris.” Wait, Host Chris is the author of these things now? Has he always penned his name to these and the women chose not to read it, or, since he didn’t appear in the episode at all last night, did they throw his name on there to justify the paycheck that he receives for doing nothing of importance on the show? Hey Lisa, feel free to email me the answer on this one since you’re the only one I know who got to the overnight date. Thanks pookie. Yes, I call Lisa pookie. She has no idea that I do, but I do. Well, this was the first time. Whatever the case, they haven’t changed the language on the fantasy suite card in fourteen seasons. Very original. Here’s what the card should’ve read with those two. “Brad and Bettina, after that hometown date, it’s very obvious your twos future is about as bright as Britney’s. So why don’t we say you skip over all the nicey-nice’s, use this key to go up to the room and make babies. Brads daughter could use a sibling. Chris.” I’m kidding. That rumor is not true. How do I know this? Because it was on a message board, that’s how. Everything you read on message boards are true, didn’t you know that?
-In Brad’s last moments with Bettina, he really lays a whopper on her. While some very uncomfortable kissing was going on, Brad says “I just always want to be around you.” Well, apparently not Bradley. Why the hell did he say that? Since when does “I just always want to be around you” mean “You’re going to be the next girl eliminated”? That made no sense. I think Brad tried to go with the reverse psychology there and completely misfired. Nice try though. I’m sure Bettina was clueless as to what you were doing. But back to their kissing, did you see that? What was that? That’s how Bettina kisses guys that she’d move to Austin for? Really? Thanks, but no thanks. I think she pulled her head away about three different times that I saw. I have no idea what went on in that hotel room after Brad closed the door, but I’m guessing Bettina did her best cold, dead fish impression.
-So it’s Dididididididididi’s turn and she gets to ride dune-buggys. Fun. Not so much. It was brought to my attention last week that the correct spelling of DeAnna’s nickname would technically be spelled “DeeDee”. Yes, I know this. However, it’s much more fun taking both of my index fingers and punching “D-I-d-I-d-I-d-I-d-I” as fast as I can every time I type her name, hence the reason I do it. Didididididididididi. See. That took all of .5 seconds to type that. So there’s your reasoning. Deal with it. Brad got very original when seeing Dididididididididididi on his date. “I’ve waited for this evening since the very first day I met her.” Uhhhh, sorry Brad. You already used that line before. Let’s try and get a little more creative shall we? How about a, “Seeing DeAnna on this date, I realized how much I love that J-Lo booty of hers.” You know, something warm and fuzzy.
-Next came one of my favorite exchanges of the night.
Brad: “I don’t meet people like you very much.”
DeAnna: “I don’t meet people like YOU very much.”
So these two are already in the phase of of the relationship where they’re repeating what each other says? Uh, oh. That’s serious. And Didididididididididi is even more smitten with Bradley than we thought. “When I first saw you, I just knew…..you have my heart….never felt so much for any one person so much before…..don’t believe it could happen so fast….” Geesh, that all happened very quick. I didn’t even know she knew Brad’s name. Now all the sudden she tells us she’s known since coming out of the limo that he was the one? Yeah, I guess I missed that. So did everyone else watching this show. I mean, are we really six episodes in? The “Women Tell All” is next week? The finale is in 2 weeks? I’ve seen every minute of every show and its safe to say this is the least invested I’ve ever been in any of the people at this point in the show. And considering they haven’t been hyping a proposal since day one, I think we know exactly what to expect in two weeks. “DeAnna, I don’t know what the future holds, but will you continue this journey with me?”
-Oh yeah, Didididididididi dropped this one on him too. “And I’m falling love with you.” Brad’s response? “You really mean that? Mmmmm….” That’s exactly what she wanted to hear Brad. Good one. Nothing like getting a nice mumble out after your future ex-girlfriend just told you she’s falling for you. Very touching moment. Really tugged at the heartstrings. Time for fantasy suite card. We all know what it says. Dididididididi’s answer: “I’d love to stay the night with you.” Brad then reveals who he’s going to pick….I mean….how he feels about DeAnna. “I want to be able to kiss her and touch her. She’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a woman. I can see a soul mate.” Check mate, Jenni. You lose. I don’t remember him saying that about Jenni when she was having one of her giggling fits. Or when she was unable to open up to him. Or when she was straddling a dolphin. Oh well. She gets to add “8 episodes on the worlds cheesiest dating show” to her resume, and that’s what’s important.
-Wow. They are wasting no time getting to the bottom of things tonight. “Dancing with the Stars” and “Samantha Who?” are taking all the “Bachelors” thunder tonight. Right back from last commercial break, we get Brad for about 10 seconds in the limo before he arrives at the Rose Ceremony. Let’s do this. There is no sign of Host Chris anywhere. They didn’t let him go to Cabo apparently. Maybe it was too expensive. Maybe he was busy. Or maybe he’s too busy perfecting his Cha-cha-cha. Brad’s going solo on this one. “To say I’ve been dreading this day is an understatement…..three women I care very much about….when I say goodbye….it’ll break my heart….unfortunately I have to begin….and thanks for only giving us 45 minutes this episode….the public doesn’t deserve 60 minutes of this torture”…
Jenni: She should’ve done a little booty shake after she got the rose. It would’ve been quite fitting. Either that or giggled.
Didididididididi: “All I wanna do is ummma zoom zoom zoom in a boom boom…..just shake your rump!!!!”
-Brad must now tell Bettina why he no longer wants to have sex with her.
Brad: “This is gonna haunt me….I thought about you the entire day. There are very real feelings here.”
Bettina: “I know it probably won’t make sense to ask ‘why’, but, ummmm, ‘why?’ Good one, Bettina.
Brad: “I truly in my heart wonder if I know who you really are”.
Me too Brad. And since this episode was thirteen minutes long, I’m sure the rest of the audience felt the same way. But c’mon, you don’t need to lie to her. Just tell her that her father scared the holy hell out of you, her mom and step mom were equally as rude, and you were about as comfortable in her house as Kim Kardashian is with clothes on. And that her Olivia Newton John hair is so 1970’s.
-This is what really disappointed me about Bettina. She didn’t melt down. What the hell is that? One curse word and barely any crying. That was the most disappointing exit yet. Couldn’t the producers have induced you to cry by talking about your previously failed marriage? Or maybe the death of your cat when you were a kid? Were they asleep at the wheel on this episode or what? How ridiculous. She gets to the final three and barely sheds a tear on the way out the door. If you want even more footage of her not crying, just go to ABC’s bachelorette page. It’ll pop right up….
http://abc.go.com/primetime/bachelor/index
“I can’t imagine putting myself out there again…..I guess I fell in love by myself.” Hey now. That’s not such a bad thing. I think that even happened to Dr. Addison Montgomery a couple episodes ago. And then she found her showerhead. Anyway, what do you mean you’re not putting yourself out there “again”? You never did on this show. Unless you think by showing up that means you put yourself out there. Putting yourself out there means actually liking the guy for reasons totally unrelated to wanting to be on television. Uhhhh, that didn’t happen with you. I very much enjoyed watching your time on the show, it was a pleasant experience, but now you must go home and hang out on Pier St. Maybe I’ll see you at Sangria in a couple weeks. Or Shade. Or Patrick Malloy’s. Or Blue 32. Or Sharkeez. Oh wait, that burned to the ground. Whatever. Just go into one of those bars on a Friday or Saturday night and I’m sure you’ll find your next future ex-husband. They’re all over that place.
-Dr. Reality Steve returns tomorrow with my ex-girlfriend Jessica as the guest columnist. As I’ve mentioned, it will continue on when the “Bachelor” is over, except for a few weeks here and there when I’m on vacation. So send all questions, comments, tips, queries, praises, criticisms to steve@realitysteve.com. Until tomorrow….
The Bachelor Links
November 6th, 2007
-Only a couple Bachelor related notes to start out with this week. We do have a link to Sheena’s boyfriends birthday video he made for her. Which really makes you question everything Sheena said after getting kicked to the curb last night. Here it is:
http://forums.jokersupdates.com/ubbthreads/showthreaded.php?Cat=&Board=TheBachelor&Number=7396393&page=&view=&sb=5&o
For some reason, I don’t think it’s working on Mac computers, but every time I pull it up, I can watch it, so enjoy. Still one of the all time classic videos. I think she was just running a bunch of B.S. at the end of the show last night because she was told to. And I’m shocked that Brad let her go without being honest and giving her the real reason: kooky Mommy. More on her later.
-Also, there’s been a rumor circulating for the last couple weeks that Brad has a 2 year old daughter, that all the women this season signed agreements before going on the show saying they knew about it, but wouldn’t bring it up, and that it’ll be revealed at the end. I have no idea how much truth there is to this rumor only to say I’d be shocked if that’s what happens. I can’t imagine the show would just go to that level and spring that on their audience during the finale. But hey, since the show is all about manipulation, can’t say I’d be too surprised if it did happen.
-And Dr. Reality Steve will be up in a couple of hours. I have to go run somewhere for work and then eat some lunch. Be back soon. On to last night….
UPDATE: DR. REALITY STEVE WILL RETURN TOMORROW. GOT BUSY WITH WORK AND TOO MUCH OTHER STUFF TO GET TO TODAY. CHECK BACK TOMORROW FOR THE GREATEST ADVICE COLUMN EVER.
-We immediately begin with Brad in the shower, probably footage that we saw in the first episode. Did we really need to see this? Is his figure that compelling that we need to see the guy in his birthday suit toweling off? Whatever the case, he’s getting ready for his hometown dates and telling us how excited he is to meet family, how it’s so important, blah blah blah. Same ol, same ol’. Just be ready Brad. This was one of the more interesting set of hometown dates we’ve ever seen. So much so that ABC, the same network that forks over a million bucks in ice for him to give to his dates, sends him off to Wichita, Kansas to see Jenni on Southwest Airlines? Are you kidding me? Let me tell you something. I can’t tell you how many times I used to fly Southwest to Las Vegas when I was living in L.A and I dreaded it every time. From the cattle call it turns into the minute they start boarding, to the seats that face each other, to the corny ass jokes the crew tells. What a horrendous flying experience every time you fly. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy. Hope you had fun Brad. Nice of ABC to pony up for you. A million dollars in jewelry and they can’t fly you first class on American? Cheap bastards.
-Brad meets Jenni at a dance hall because that’s where she won her first dance competition for $50. Jenni is a dancer in case you didn’t know. She likes to dance. Why? Because “it’s her passion and she’s really good at it.” Well, I’ll be the judge of that young lady. Don’t get ahead of yourself. Jenni starts putting on a routine for Brad. Ooooohhh yeah girl. Shake it. Do that thang you do. Uh huh. Uh huh. Work it girl. Gimmie the booty pop. Yeah, that’s it. Right there Jenni. Oh yeah. Daddy like. Almost there…….uhhhhhhh, where was I? Anyway, Jenni danced, I enjoyed it, Brad got a kick out of it, and all was well in in the land of Brenni. As well as in my apartment. I thoroughly enjoyed her routine. So much so that I need to go get a bottle of water real quick. Be right back.
-Aaaaaaahhhhhhh, much better. So Brenni start discussing a possible future together. She was a Phoenix Suns Dancer during the 06-07 season, but in case you didn’t know, they all have to re-try out the following season to make the team. She hasn’t heard yet if she’s made it. If she does, it means another year in Phoenix and these two lovebirds will have to do the long distance thing. She’s afraid he might stop liking her. On the Bachelor? You mean the time away from each other causes couples to realize they don’t like each other anymore? Well, that would be a first. I don’t think that’s ever happened on this show before. Except for in ten of the eleven seasons. And in two of the three “Bachelorette” seasons. Other than that, their track record is perfect. I can’t possibly see what Jenni is worried about. Brad too. Long distance relationships that are started from a reality TV show are no different than any others right? Oh, they’re completely different? My bad.
-Jenni says it’s been 2 ½ years since she brought a guy home. I’m guessing she meant a guy home to her family in Wichita, and not a Phoenix Suns player back to her apartment for a booty call. So Brad gets to meet Dad Richard, Mother Vicki, sister Tiffany, and crazy grandma Betty at her mothers hair salon, which I think doubles as her house. I was a little confused about that whole thing. Did she actually live there too? Immediately, crazy grandma Betty starts in with, “Are you a drinker?” Brad: “I’m the most boring bar guy you could meet.” Uh huh. Saying that in front of family will win you points. But I’m guessing all your patrons at the Dizzy Rooster and the Chuggin Monkey would beg to differ. And oh yeah, while we’re on the topic of the bars you own, I have a quick question. Is there a reason there’s a picture of DeAnna dressed in a policeman’s outfit on the My Space page for the Chuggin Monkey? If DeAnna lives in Georgia. What would she be doing in Austin visiting one of Brad’s bars the weekend before Halloween? I’m just curious. I’m sure it’s totally nothing. She looks like she’s sure having a great time though. And yeah, I think I need to take a visit to the Chuggin Monkey some weekend. There are some hot ass women hanging out there.
http://www.myspace.com/chugginmonkey
-Crazy grandma isn’t done with Brad. “That little lady ain’t gonna be a walking baby factory.” Easy there, Grams. Brad’s got to actually choose your granddaughter before he starts impregnating her. I think. Before Grams started asking Brad questions about his sperm count, Mom steals him away for a minute to do his hair. So she puts him under the sink, does the whole shampoo job, and starts grilling him. “So you work at a bar. Don’t you meet a lot of girls?” Translation: Why are you still single if you’re hot and work at a bar? Just come out and say it, Mom. Brad: “I don’t meet people like Jenni too often.” You mean dancers that flaunt their portfolio and are looking to add “Contestant on the Bachelor” to their resume? Yeah, you really wouldn’t find too many of those around. Especially at the Chuggin Monkey. Excuse me while I go back to that My Space page and then get another bottle of water. Thanks.
-Dad gets some time with Brad alone and asks what his goals are for the future. Brad: “I’d like to do some real estate, also…..” Dad: “You didn’t need to list them for me, I just wanted to make sure you had some.” Jenni’s dad was cool. Pretty much put Bettina’s to shame. So Brad assures him Jenni would be well off with him. “I promise your daughter will be well taken care of.” There we go, Brad. Flaunt your money. Tell him you’ll buy his daughter anything she wants. And that you’re a self made millionaire, and she can dance her tight little ass off all she wants as long as she comes home to him to make babies someday. Yee haw!
-Speaking of dancing, did you know Jenni loves to dance? It’s a big part of her life. So on her final alone time with Brad, they discuss that she will be a Suns dancer again this year. Oh yeah, that news just happened to come down while everyone was sitting down at dinner. What a total coincidence, huh? Perfect timing. Ahhh, see. Brenni was meant to be. Uh huh. Anyway, Jenni wants Brad to know that even though she’s stuck in Phoenix for another year, she wouldn’t want that to get in the way of their phone sex relationship they’d have to have if he picks her. She’s got no problem with the long distance thing because this is an opportunity she can’t pass up. She loves to dance. And shake that ass. And passing up the opportunity to get hit on night in and night out by a bunch of millionaire NBA players is just not something she’s willing to give up just yet. Brad is totally fine with that arrangement since he’s seen the talent that walks around the Chuggin Monkey on a nightly basis. “Sure honey, go ahead. Do your dancy thing. I’ll be right here in Austin. Every night. Look at these fine pieces of work. It’ll totally work out between us.”
-Sheena’s date is up next in Walnut Creek, California. They didn’t show Brad boarding his plane for this one, but I’m pretty sure he flew Frontier Airlines. When he greets Sheena, she’s waiting on a dock, while her mother and father are out on the boat ready to take them out. Immediately we are able to see where Sheena gets her giants breastseseseseses from. I guess Mom and daughter shared the same doctor. And let it be known that Sheena’s ex-boyfriend/boyfriend/little buddy’s name is Josh. I wanted to make sure you knew that since I’ll be referring to him pretty much any time I talk about Sheena the rest of the column. I think Josh is about as happy as a pig in slop after watching last night’s events transpire. Except maybe for that line about “I’ve never had my heart broken like this before”. How’d that taste, Joshua?
-To say Sheenas mom was a little out there would be an understatement. She’s a kook. Plain and simple. Very much into horoscopes. I’ve given you my feelings before on horoscopes, so no need to get into that again, but someone that puts that much stock into what sign you are, has a few screws loose upstairs. Immediately Kooky mommy starts in with it. The Kook: “What sign are you?” Brad: “Scorpio.” Kook: “Sheenas dad is a Scorpio.” Sheena is an Aries. Apparently those two mix well. Of course they do. He could’ve been a Pisces and she could’ve been a Sagittarius and that would’ve mixed well too. But if Sheena brought home some loser, no matter if they’re signs were the most perfect match in the known world of horoscopes, I’m sure Kooky mommy would’ve told her later that it wasn’t meant to be because of their signs. At least Sheena is separating herself from this claiming she knows nothing about horoscopes. But don’t tell that to the kook. She’ll have none of it. “I felt like I’ve known him forever. He felt like my son-in-law. It’s almost like he’s already part of the family.” Because he’s a Scorpio? Oh Good God woman, shutup. You just met the guy ten minutes ago. You’re trying way too hard, and embarrassing your daughter in the process. I think some of that silicone might’ve gotten to your head. Go get that checked out.
-Brad gets cornered by the Kook alone in the house and probably wanted to slit his wrists, just like Serena’s brother on “Gossip Girl”. News flash: A new show just got added to my TiVo this week. And what a surprise? Another chick show with a demographic of teenage girls. Sometimes I really question what in the world it is I’m doing with my life. But I’m hooked, no doubt. “Cruel Intentions” meets the “OC”. Right up my alley. So anyway, if you thought the Kook was a little nutty on the boat, it was nothing compared to this masterpiece. She was rambling on and on and on about, well, I’m not sure. I was writing so fast, this was all I caught. “You are my husbands sign…..Big Dipper in the sky…..I know she’s the one…..she might be somebody else’s one (Josh)….but I know she’s the one.” Huh? What is this woman saying? Did she take her medication this morning? The last thing a potential son-in-law wants to hear the first time he’s ever met you, is that crap. I wonder if Sheena and Josh’s breakup had anything to do with mom cornering him and talking about the Big Dipper and the stars aligning and the daily horoscopes in the back of the newspaper. Why don’t you stop talking for just a second mom?
-It didn’t stop there. “We are ready to commit. She is ready to be one man’s everything. Don’t you think that?” Brad: “Ummm, yeah. Sure. Definitely. Whatever you say, crazy lady.” Thankfully Sheena comes in and prevents any more damage. Sheena: “Did my mom embarrass me?” Brad: “No, no, not at all.” Brad is lying. If I were him, I would’ve politely said, “Beverly, I appreciate your honesty, and I find what you have to say very fascinating, but for love of all things that are good, please never open your mouth in front of me again. You’re scaring the sh** out of me.” And what’s this “We’re ready to commit” stuff? “We”? So if Brad or Josh asked to marry Sheena, you’d be walking down the aisle too? Kinda like a package deal? I really don’t think I’m being harsh when I say this, but that mother destroyed any chance of her daughter having a future with Brad. No guy wants to hear that. Just ask Josh.
-Of course, they didn’t want to make us think the date went completely horrible, so we get some Jacuzzi action with Brad and Sheena. And Sheena in her bikini. And her goodies on full display for the world to see. Sheena: “So did my mom embarrass me?” Brad: “No, not at all. It’s a great way to see where you get who you are - and frankly it scares the living hell out of me. I know they say a lot of daughters grow up to become their mothers. Let’s hope for your sake that never happens. I don’t want you teaching our kids about witch craft and the Big Dipper and planets realigning. I might have to divorce you.” Ok, he didn’t say all that. But he was thinking it. And looking back on it, it seemed like the footage of Sheena and her hometown date took all of about five minutes. That was easily the one given the least air time. And judging by his decision at the end, we can now see why. Plus, they needed to give more time to Bettina and her family of a**holes.
-Onto another weird hometown date in Canton, GA to meet Dididididis clan. Upon arriving, Brad is given a basket of peaches by Diddididididididi. You know, because Georgia is the peach state. How cute. And lame. All at the same time. So we get to meet her father Greg, brother Thomas, sister Krissy, and step mom Rebecca. Dididididididi is soooooooo excited to bring Brad home to meet the folks. “For the 1st time in my life, I’ve been a 100% proud with a man on my arm”. Translation: I’ve dated nothing but douche bags until now. My parents will be shocked and happy to see I’m not bringing someone home who isn’t a drug addict, or covered in tattoos, or reminds them of Justin Bobby from the “Hills”. Something tells me Dididididididi dates guys that, shall we say, aren’t anything like Brad. I think tends to gravitate towards the guys from the dirrrrrrrrty south. You know what I’m saying? Me neither.
-Brad gets some alone time with pops and puts him on the spot. Brad: “Do you believe this could be real between your daughter and I.” Dad Dididididididi: “Sure. Absolutely. I’ve watched all 11 seasons of this show, and there’s no doubt in my mind this could work out. I mean, just the other day when I was watching ESPNews and saw Jesse Palmer on there, I found myself, ‘Wow. What a great guy. It’s a shame he and Jessica only lasted 14 seconds together. She must’ve been a real bundle to deal with because it definitely couldn’t have been Jesse’s fault.’ And then when I saw Bob Guiney and his wife on “Dancing with the Stars” the other week, I couldn’t help but think of the “Bachelor” and how he used it to pimp out his band, then started hooking up with that daytime soap girl, all the while leaving Estella hanging out to dry. So sure Brad, I definitely think this could be real between my daughter and you.” Aaaaaaaannnnnd….scene.
-I don’t know if we had learned this before, if we did I probably wasn’t paying attention, but Didididididi’s mother died when she was little. So she figured she break out the photo album while Dad and Brad were talking and catch him up on the past. There’s nothing like photo albums. Looking at pictures of a bunch of people you don’t know, in situations that aren’t the least bit interesting to you. Good times. Now, to be fair to Didididididi, obviously her mother was very important to her so she wanted to show Brad what she looked like. I can’t fault her for that. That was a nice gesture. And good idea of Dididididididi stop the photo album tour about a quarter of the way through. Any longer and Brad might’ve fallen asleep. Gave him something to come back for. And he said he would. Now, maybe it wasn’t in the league of Byron toasting Tawnya’s family with “Here’s to Christmas in Texas” and then dumping her in the final episode, but it’s still up there. And oh yeah, did I mention that somehow just randomly, Didididididi was photographed at one of Brad’s bars in recent weeks? Probably just a total coincidence, right?
-It wouldn’t be a hometown date if weirdness wasn’t thrown in the mix, so, all of Didididididis Greek family shows up unannounced for a party. And by “unannounced” , I mean “told to by the producers to liven up this boring ass day.” Over comes a bunch of Greeks whose names I couldn’t pronounce other than her Yaya and Papu. Weren’t those two of the Smurfs? Aahhh, those crazy Greeks I tell ya’. They sure know how to live it up. Dancing, drinking, screaming “Opah!” for whatever reason. Makes me wanna run out and marry into a Greek family. Put those crazies together with my crazy Italian family, and I guarantee family get togethers will never be the same. Yes, I’m Italian. But I’m not true Italian, if you know what I mean. I don’t wear gold chains, drive an IROC, grease my hair, or have Tony Manera posters on my wall. I grew up in the OC, so I couldn’t possibly be true Italian. All my family is back east though (Bronx, Brooklyn, Manhattan) so they just like to make fun of me when I tell them I eat Olive Garden or Macaroni Grill.
-Time for the most disturbing hometown date in recent as Brad travels to Wash, DC to meet Bettina’s band of A-holes. Glad to see Bettina dressed for the occasion to greet Brad. Did she just roll out of bed or something? Nice sweats and tank top you got going there. She must really be looking to impress him. Although, Brad thought she looked beautiful. Go figure. So, we get to meet four a-holes in Bettina’s family: her father, step mom, sister, and mother. Her father was quite a character. Kinda gave off that “Jeffrey Dahmer meets Stephen King” type of vibe. So needless to say, he was a bundle of sunshine. Her dad is a professor at some university and is disturbed by the fact that Brad never graduated college. Very disturbed. Almost to the point that he’ll chop off his head and put it in his freezer with the rest of the bodies. Stephen King: “It’s a great disappointment.” Gee Dad, tell us how you really feel.
-Now it’s A-hole #2’s job to chime in. This would be the step mom from hell. “Do I like the idea of my step daughter being hooked up with a guy who runs a bunch of bars? No.” Then also asks Brad, “Because of your job, do you work late at night?” Of course he does lady. He works at a bar. None of the other families seem to have a problem with their daughters possibly marrying a self-made millionaire, but because he didn’t read “War and Peace” you’re gonna give him crap? Go away. You and the rest of the a-hole clan can go be miserable somewhere else. Not on this show. This show is all about love, and honesty, and happiness, and bunny rabbits, and daffodils, and potpourri, and sunshine and anything else that brings a smile to a childs face. Your negativity is ruining my enjoyment for the show. Damn you, woman.
-Back to Spawn of Dahmer, he’s got more enlightening things to tell us. Namely, Bettina’s ex-husband. Oh, this was a doozy. “Bettina’s first husband was a wonderful, wonderful man. She’ll never find another one like him.” What? Why didn’t they just stop rolling cameras at this point, pack up the trucks, and head back home? Either that or keep the cameras rolling and have a reality show just based on Bettina’s cast of a-holes for a whole season. I’m sure people would love to hear her family complain for eight episodes straight. Can’t we all just get along? C’mon, everyone join hands and sing “Kumbaya”. Or how about this little ditty? “You are my sunshine, my only sunshine…..” Man, and I thought Kristy was a downer. This family is re-writing the record books on family misery.
-And it didn’t stop there. Brad gets to hang with a-holes #2 and #3 (that would be mom and step mom) in the kitchen, and they continue the verbal beat down on our poor little Bradley. They’re both questioning that Brad is leading some women on at this point in the competition. “You cannot screw around with peoples hearts.” You can’t? Then obviously you haven’t watched this show before. That’s basically what the show is about. Leading women on, telling them how happy you are with them, saying you can’t wait to see them next weekend, and then canceling your date through a text message. Ummmm, yeah. I got stood up this weekend and am not thrilled about it. But enough about me. The point being that these two a-holes are oblivious to how this show works. But I’m guessing Bettina has some modeling career she’s pushing, or maybe needs to add some more footage to her demo reel, but whatever the case, doesn’t seem like she’s here for the right reasons.
-So after Brad gets thoroughly whipped by Bettina’s family, it’s time to do the most logical thing. Take it all out on Bettina. Brad: “I might not have an education, but I’m sure intelligent enough not to judge anybody.” You tell her Brad. Bettina then takes her whole foot and sticks it in her mouth with this beauty. “Well, I don’t look that great on paper either.” Ouch. Why not just tell the guy you think he’s a complete failure for not finishing college? I actually felt sorry for Brad at this point. What an absolute disaster of a hometown date. Which makes his decision to send Sheena home all the more shocking. So, why exactly is he keeping Bettina and that family around? I know Sheenas mom was a lunatic and all, but at least she wasn’t verbally degrading the guy. One final blow from Brad: “I don’t like anyone questioning me. I don’t need to hear how I don’t look good on paper.” I thought for a split second Brad was gonna haul off and call her a b**ch at this point. Then I remembered he was a southern gentleman and would never do such a thing.
-Rose Ceremony time. Brad: “So good to see all four amazing families….except you’re a-hole clan Bettina…..it’s a huge part of my life to involve families….makes it much more personal for me….saying goodbye…breaks my heart…”
Didididididididi: “Shake that ass, watch yo’ self, show me what you workin’ with…..”
Jenni: I think I’m gonna rewind and watch her dance again. It’s been 20 minutes, hasn’t it?
Oh my God. No Host Chris. He didn’t feel the need to tell us this week that 3 minus 2 is 1. Thank you so much. Now go practice the Paso Doble.
Bettina: This made zero sense to me. Not like I think she has a chance of winning, because she doesn’t, but wouldn’t you much rather swim around Cabo with Sheenas fun bags than Bettina and her misery? I didn’t get that at all.
-Even though Brad had trouble telling Sillary last week that he only saw her as a friend, he was about as blunt as could be with Sheena. “You are so deserving of happiness and the perfect guy. Honestly, I wish I was that guy, but I don’t think I am. I’m sorry.” If only he would’ve given us a reason why he didn’t think he was the perfect guy, then he would’ve been the first Bachelor in history to be 100% honest with someone that he just booted. Instead, he was only 90%. I think he should’ve just told her that Josh is the man for her, he could never put together a video montage like he did and stick it up on You Tube begging for her to take him back, and still have any pride left whatsoever. Josh, you are a true romantic. I hope Sheena stays as far away from you as possible.
-Sheena: “You were the person I thought about before I went to bed and after I woke up.” Ooooohhhh. Sexy. And what did you do before you went to bed Sheena? So you thought about him while you were brushing your teeth? Taking off your make up? Or during, ummm, other things? Naughty, naughty, girl. Then Sheena started in with the B.S. “I was falling for him….I didn’t expect this to happen….I feel like my heart was ripped in half and stepped on….I’ve never had my heart broken like this before….and the sad thing is I’d do it all over again because that’s how much I liked him.” Ummm, yeah. That is pretty sad. You’d do this again? Even though he doesn’t like you? And Josh is waiting at home with a video camera and CD of love songs? Wow. You’re just as looney as your mom. Maybe it’s a good thing her experience on this show has come to an end. Hey, she got some Chopard earrings out of it, didn’t she? I’m sure those will be up on Ebay in a matter of minutes, if they haven’t been already.
-So next week, we get the overnight dates in Cabo. When was the last time the overnight dates all took place in the same city? I’m sure some of you die hard fans remember, but I don’t remember the last time that happened. So while he spends the night with one girl in Cabo, the other two are in the same city but at a different hotel? How awesome would it be if say Brad and Jenni spend the night together, and they put Bettina and Dididididi in the two rooms adjacent to Brad and Jenni’s without telling them. If I were producer that’s what I’d do. I’d make the two girls who weren’t on the overnight date be forced to listen to the headboard banging against the wall. This needs to happen.
The Bachelor Links
October 30th, 2007
-Let’s immediately get to some Bachelor related news, since there are four things to cover. One of which was awesome, until someone decided to delete it off You Tube. More on that in a second. The first order of business is that this week’s guest columnist on “Dr. Reality Steve” is none other than Michele Leavy, the bachelorette dumped in the 2nd episode by Brad because she fell down the stairs and almost paralyzed herself. New Jersey chick, big Bon Jovi fan, c’mon, you all remember her. How can you not? Let me assure you that Michele is fine from her fall, but she’ll explain there was a lot more to that fall than what was shown on TV. Really? You mean the editing toyed with that? No way! Yes, Michele is fine, living comfortably back in Jersey wearing her stone wash jeans, teasing her bangs, and spraying cans of Aqua Net in her hair. So be sure to check out her answers to some of the looney questions that came in this week. Reality Steve is now a huge fan of Michele’s body….of work. Great answers.
-Also come to find out today that our very own Host Chris wants to be on “Dancing with the Stars”. He told the New York Post in an interview he’d “do it in a heartbeat”, but that ABC won’t cast him because “they said it would be awkward if I was on a show that led into my own show.” No, what would be awkward is seeing you dance. This is “Dancing with the Stars”, you realize that, don’t you Chris? It’s a dancing competition, it’s not a contest to see who can read cue cards the best. ABC is being too technical about this. Who cares if he’s on a show that leads into his? Does it really matter? It’s not like he would win. Sabrina is a Cheetah girl on the Disney channel, that’s owned by ABC. Doesn’t seem to be much conflict there. I’m starting an online petition now titled “Let Chris Dance!”, I want everyone to sign it, and I’m gonna march it up to the steps of ABC myself. Ok, maybe not.
-Our 2nd order of business deals with our Phoenix Suns cheerleader Jenni. Someone got a hold of her resume and put it online. Very impressive. Here it is:
http://www.fordrbatalent.com/images/actors_resumes/jenni_croft_resume2.pdf
I like the “Diddy’s” featured dancer at the 2005 MTV Awards. Uh oh. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. He hit that. Plain and simple. Also, the fact that she’s been a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader, a Miami Heat dancer, and is now a Phoenix Suns dancer makes me think she likes moving around a bit, which is something that Brad doesn’t seem too fond of. She’s done a lot of stuff. A lot. Like I said last week, the show is already portraying her as the winner with all the camera time they give her and seeing how many times her and Brad make out. Something tells me this ultimately might lead to her downfall. And if Brad does pick her, this career of hers will certainly get in the way and they’ll be over within a couple months. She’s definitely on this show to add to resume, that’s fairly obvious.
-And the best news surrounds Sheena. There was a You Tube video that went up last week entitled “Happy Birthday Sheena”. It was bout 4 minutes long, and was a video tribute of Sheena and her “boyfriend”. Might have been her ex, might have been her current boyfriend, who knows? But it was basically a 4 minute video montage with still pictures and videos set to music of Sheena and her “boyfriend” together. And it was classic. Looked like it basically chronicled their whole relationship together. Pictures from everywhere, then once in a while it morphed into a live video from them skiing, or at an amusement park, really good, cheesy stuff. Problem is, when I went to go look at it again, the video had been taken down, so make of that what you will. That obviously wasn’t supposed to get out, but it did, someone found out about it, and yanked it off the internet. Damn. I wanted to watch it again. How touching. So just know that Sheena either just broke up with a boyfriend, still has a boyfriend, or had a boyfriend before the show but doesn’t anymore. I’m gonna go with “still has a boyfriend”, since it’ll make for a much juicier column. Sorry Sheena. That’s what you get for that video getting out there. Onto last night…
-Host Chris, fresh off practicing the Samba, tells us there will be two 1-on-1 dates and a group date. Bettina gets the first 1-on-1 and it’s a gondola ride. I think the gondola ride has become one of ABC’s go-to dates. Seems like there’s one every season. Probably because when you go under a bridge, you’re supposed to kiss. Except if you’re Bettina. Bettina: “Every time I see Brad, the more and more I fall in love with him. But I’ve been brought up to play hard to get, so if he wants any of this ass, he’s gonna have to work a little harder for it.” Or something like that. Bettina is a tough little cookie to break. She keeps telling Brad how much she likes him, how much fun she has with him, blah blah blah, but when it comes to anything physical, she’s a giant prude. I guess she could be commended for that. It’s just that, well, on this show, no one wants to see you playing hard to get. It sucks, it’s boring, and it’s probably gonna get you booted. Brad isn’t going to be your husband if you won’t let him touch you. So give it up already. There’s only a few episodes left.
-But I’ll be damned if Brad isn’t trying his hardest to get some. Brad: “Have you dated since your divorce?” Translation: Have you turned as cold as a fish since your marriage fell apart? I think Bettina said she had dated since her divorce, but also informed him that first base was as far as anyone got. Because mommy and daddy raised her to be a huge tease. That’s good parenting. I was actually beginning to feel sorry for Brad. He rolled out with at least 10 compliments in a row and you could see the impatience seeping through the television set. I thought he was going to pull his hair out. Or even cut the date short and tell Mr. Gondola guy in the mime shirt and gay hat to stop the ride so he could get out to punch his clown. I sure would’ve. This is a dating show missie. He’s here to find his wife, not play footsie all night long. Other than Bettina’s divorce, her parents hating Brad next week, and her reluctance to even look at him in a sexual way, I think these two are well on their way to marital bliss.
-Basically, their whole date started to revolve around the fact that they were moving about as slow as two humans could possibly move. He asked her, “Are you nervous?”, which is another way of him saying, “What the hell is going on here? Jenni’s had no problem mauling my tongue every time I see her, and I can’t get you to even lean on me.” At this point, Brad’s frustration is through the roof, but instead of losing his cool, he goes Mr. B.S. on us and tells us basically, “Hey, she’s starting to open up a bit, I wanted to be there just to listen and to be there for her.” Gotta hand it to you, Brad. I would’ve jumped overboard by this point. Or started drinking so heavily, that I’d be immune to this 4th grade behavior she’s pulling. Be there just to listen? Are you serious? Next thing you’ll tell us is you care about her feelings and are interested in comforting her in times of need. Wow. I don’t know what to say, other than, good luck with that.
-So the group date is Dididididididi, Kristy, Sillary, and Jenni. Which was basically just one final attempt for the show to give us the gratuitous shots of Brad with his shirt off and the girls in bikini’s. They were chicken fighting in the pool, they went on the slip-n-slide, we got to see Didididididididi’s giant legs and ass, good times all around. Boy, she’s built like a truck downstairs. Anyway, all of them seemed to be having a great time being drunk and wet. And when I say “them”, I mean Brad, Didididididi, Jenni, and Silly. We never saw Kristy jump in the pool, nor go on the slip-n-slide. She basically sat at the edge trying to get some sun on her pale body. I mean, if there were ever a show where there was a 100% guarantee on who was going home, this was it. Could ABC have focused any less on Kristy this episode? We barely heard her speak, and they made it perfectly clear she didn’t want to join in any reindeer games they were playing at the pool party. What a social misfit. She didn’t want to play at the improv, now she can’t even have fun a pool party? I think SNL has found a female to play Debbie Downer if they ever want to revive that skit. It’s Kristy. Kristy, you’re no fun. Go home. And take your ball with you.
-The pool party is also where we get to see a side of Sillary that, frankly, I was quite amused by. Let’s just say she has the mouth of a drunken sailor once you get some alcohol in her. Only in the unedited version of this episode will ever to get to hear exactly what she said, but thanks to the magic of TiVo, I was able to rewind it a few times to try and lip read something of things she said over what was being beeped out. And here’s some of the things I know that she said. “I would let him ravish me….clothes off….bend over….like slap my ass a couple times….call it a day.” Now that’s a woman. You go, Hillary. We need more of that on this show and less of your mascara running down your face after crying for three hours straight. So, he keeps Bettina who acts like he has coodies when she’s around him, but dumps Sillary who openly admits to wanting to be treated like his sex slave? Go figure. I think to be fair to all parties, Brad should’ve been able to view the tape of Sillary telling us what she wanted Brad to do to her before he made his decision.
-But Sillary Hillary Dock isn’t done. She’s gonna get right to the bottom of this with Brad. Can’t fault her for wanting answers. Especially on a show where all get is a bunch of canned answers, and everyone tip-toeing around what’s really going on. Sillary: “I have a blunt question for you: How do you feel about me right now?” Brad: “Uhhhh….err….beautiful….err….fun…uhhh….sweet….nice…kind….have a great time with you….best friend…..BUT, (there’s always a but), I need to figure out if there’s any romantic feelings beyond you being a great friend.” Translation: You’ve officially been thrown into the friend category, but I don’t want to tell you this right now while we’re on this raft in the pool because you might try and drown me. You’d think Brad would easily be able to fend her off and could drown her if he wanted to, but I’m guessing she’s impossible to drown because of those two flotation devices strapped to the front of her chest. Her and Sheena are battling for nicest…smiles in the house. Yeah, that’s it. Smiles.
-Back at the mansion, the final date box arrives for Sheena, who has the other solo date. The box gave some clues as to what the date would be about, but Sheena had trouble figuring it out. And Bettina hates her. Bettina: “Sheena’s just young…not ready for marriage or the idea of it.” Apparently neither were you, Bettina. Last time I checked, your marriage lasted a year and you did it when you were young. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. Just because your boyfriend didn’t put a video montage of your relationship together up on You Tube, doesn’t mean you have to hate on Sheena. Damn it. You don’t know how pissed I am that thing got taken down. Maybe some of you saw it, but I’m guessing most of you didn’t. One of the finest four minutes you’ll ever see. Especially when the video is made for someone who’s in the final four of a dating show and has a legitimate shot to win.
-To wrap things up at the pool party, here’s what went down. They didn’t show two seconds of Brad and Kristy Downer alone, probably because she was off sulking somewhere while everyone else was eating cake, wearing party hats, and throwing confetti in the air. Kristy apparently avoids fun like it’s the plague. Didididididididi got some alone time with Brad on some lawn chairs, but it was in full view of where Jenni and Sillary were sitting, so Brad did the respectful thing and didn’t make out with her in front of them. So what does he do next? Drops Dididididididi back off with the other girls, asks if he could borrow Jenni for a minute, they go around the corner where no one can see them, and make out on a hammock. Now that’s what I’m talking about Brad. Can’t make out with one of them, go try someone else. Brad is a smart one, I tell ya. And oh yeah, the minute Brad took Jenni around the corner, every girl there knew they were about to tongue wrestle. This is where we saw the beginning of the end of Sillary. She was a wreck that Brad was making out with Jenni and not with her. It was only a sign of things to come.
-So it was time for Brad and Sheena’s solo date. I hope her boyfriend didn’t throw anything at the TV while watching this last night. From what I saw in the video, he and Sheena never had a date like this. Once again, Brad reiterates to us that his brother Chad loved Sheena, and his brothers opinion means the world to him. We know. We get it. I’m beginning to think Chad wants Sheena more than Brad does. Seems to me he’s basically telling us, “Look, I never looked twice at Sheena until my brother told me to. Now I notice what a nice set of….eyes she has. Yeah, eyes. And I think I’d like to get to know them…errr….her better.” The more he tells us how much his brother liked her, the less I think he likes her. It’s like he had to justify his brother who didn’t look anything like him being on the show. How about making your own decisions, Brad? Do you guys share everything? Oh wait, don’t answer that. I think I already know the answer.
-So Brad picks Sheena up and both are dressed very casual, and that’s because Brad has some surprises in store for Sheena. First is, once they arrive a mansion, there are six dresses on mannequins and she gets to choose which one to wear. Needless to say, Sheena was surprised and let out an “OH MAYE GASH!!!!!” Huh? When did Sheena pick up a Minnesota accent? She’s from freakin’ Walnut Creek. I don’t know anybody in No Cal that talks like that. Does Sheena ice fish too? Does she pronounce “about” as “a boat”? Is she a big fan of the Minnesota Timberwolves “Or-gan-EYE-zation”? That accent caught me completely off guard. Walnut Creek my ass. Someone find out her true hometown so I don’t have to. And someone go check on her boyfriend to see if he’s injured himself after watching her date last night. I’m worried about that guy.
-So Sheena puts on the red dress because it undoubtedly accentuates her….eyes, yet again. She really knows how to pick those dresses, man. So as we saw in the previews, she comes down the stairs, Brad’s waiting at the bottom looking up at her giant….flowing hair, and then Sheena proceeds to fall on her ass. Although if you ask her, that’s not what she fell on. “I fell flat on my face. I hope I didn’t blow it.” Huh? Her feet came out from under her and she stumbled onto her butt for a few seconds. She’s acting like she cracked her skull or broke her nose. Is she drunk right now? Where are the paramedics? I guess they’re still attending to Michele’s broken neck and bee sting.
-You know what bothered me the most about this date? Brad kept telling us about all the surprises he had in store for Sheena, and was so excited to give her a pair of Chopard diamond earrings shaped like a heart. Yet, he’s playing it off like he thought of it all, everything was put together by him, and he paid for it. Granted, Brad might be our first self-made millionaire in Bachelor history, but I’m guessing he didn’t fork over that kinda cake for Chopard diamond earrings on a chick that his brother had to talk him into keeping around. Please. No Brad, you didn’t buy Sheena a pair of earrings, ABC did. And Brad, you didn’t buy six dresses for her to choose, ABC did. Frankly, you didn’t do sh** other than show up. Did he actually think we’d believe everything was his idea? Please. By the way, Sheena’s boyfriend was at home tightening the noose while this date was happening. He couldn’t have been thrilled about this. Essentially Brad just mentally made love to this guy’s girlfriend on national television, while he sits at home and stews over it.
-Their fairy tale date continues as they sit down for drinks surrounded by a bunch of black and white balloons. Ok, ok. So maybe Brad did help out and pick out the balloons. Maybe he even blew them up. Brad drops the “Why are you single?” line on Sheena. Oh Brad, if you only knew. Who says she is? Sheena’s answer: “I’m incredibly picky, and believe it or not, really shy.” Brad then followed that with something from the heart. “I just want you to know that there’s not one fake thin