Yes, believe or not, only 2 weeks have passed since the last column, and not 8. See? Iâ€™m getting better. Imagine the day where I write two columns in one week? Used to do it all the time. Not so much anymore. Why? Laziness basically. Anyway, before we get started, a few things I need to cover. And be prepared, this is a long column.
Quite a few of you have commented about my last column where I mentioned that â€œwomen are lame.â€ Please, please, please. Calm down now. Whoever was reading that, I wasnâ€™t talking about you. By no means do I despise the female gender. In fact, far from it. But sometimes a manâ€™s got to vent his frustrations, and what better way to do it than in my column which is read by 95%â€¦.women. Oops. So please donâ€™t take offense. Be secured in knowing that women are still the #1 reason that I am not a homosexual today.
Onto some brighter news, it was announced last week that our only married â€œBachelorâ€ couple, Trista and Ryan, are now expecting their first child. This was announced, of course, by Team Trista. By her publicist. And under her terms. Because, you know, sheâ€™s steering that ship with a firm hand. Iâ€™m even willing to bet Ryan didnâ€™t even have much say in the conception either. Busy firefighter, works long hours, then to come home to that nag? No thanks. â€œGet home right now! Iâ€™m ovulating! And according to my chart, I only have 15 minutes today where Iâ€™m most fertile! Hurry up!â€ And of course that sap probably dropped everything he was doing, ran home, and serviced her. Poor guy. But good luck, kiddos. Weâ€™re all behind yaâ€™.
-Also since we last spoke, Britney Spears went crazy. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Some of you may be saying, â€œHey Steve, donâ€™t trample on somebody when theyâ€™re down. She really needs help right now.â€ And I agree. To a certain extent. She does need help. But something tells me sheâ€™s not gonna listen to it. I hate to sound morbid, but I donâ€™t think Britney will still be alive within five years. Sheâ€™s completely lost it. And you think sheâ€™s bad now? Wait til she loses her kids. Then all the sudden sheâ€™s gonna get miraculously better? You know what the only good thing to come out of Britney shaving her head was? It finally answered a question that pretty much every guy has had on his mind since Day 1 with her. Yes, we now know that the curtains match the drapes. Moving onâ€¦.
-And finally, I feel the need to bring this up because Iâ€™m confronted with it everyday when I visit the gym. Usually Iâ€™m there in the afternoon when none of the flat screens are on anything I want to watch. That needs to be remedied. Can we please stop showing â€œLaw and Orderâ€, and â€œMSNBCâ€, and â€œWho Wants to Be a Millionaireâ€, and â€œStock Market Reportsâ€ when Iâ€™m at the gym? Is it too much to ask that ESPN be on a screen that doesnâ€™t face sideways and you can only see it from the worst treadmill in the place? Is that too hard? Anyway, another show thatâ€™s always on is â€œEllenâ€. Pretty neutral on her. Donâ€™t hate her, donâ€™t love her. Donâ€™t really get the whole dancing around every show, but hey, thatâ€™s me. My question is, last week they were hyping Oprah making an appearance on her show with the title â€œItâ€™ll change the face of daytime television foreverâ€. Really? Why? Because one lesbian is interviewing another lesbian? How is this changing the face of daytime television? Seemed a bit over hyped to me. And as far as I know, that interview came and went, and television is still the same. Letâ€™s beginâ€¦.
-Canâ€™t say Iâ€™m too shocked by the four that have departed: Nicole, Amy, Paul, and Rudy. Rudy looked, and sounded, like a girl. Nicole sang like a dude. Amy had the personality of a candle, according to Simon. And Paul the Asian sang a very effeminate George Michael classic. Paul, last time I checked, â€œCareless Whisperâ€ was not a hip-hop song. You might not want to be-bop to it while youâ€™re performing. Doesnâ€™t matter. Youâ€™re gone anyway. I was thoroughly baffled by his performance and wouldâ€™ve been protesting if he didnâ€™t go home. That was horrible. Granted, so were about five of the other guys performances, but still, Paul and his bare feet were a bit much. Amy managed to put me to sleep before her minute and a half was up. That was an easy call.
-Iâ€™m sure Idol isnâ€™t too happy this season with the 6 guy, 6 girl final twelve considering thereâ€™s about four guys who were even remotely in tune last week. But hereâ€™s who I think will make the final 12: Guys – Phil, Blake, Chris Richardson, Brandon, Nick, and Sundance. I know, I know. Sundance was horrible. But that name is too marketable and I guarantee he at least makes the final 12. He wonâ€™t win by longshot, but heâ€™ll last another two weeks. Trust me. But if by some reason he doesnâ€™t make it, you can throw Chris Sligh in there for the freak factor alone. Both wont make it, but one of them will. As for the girls, thatâ€™s a tough one. Iâ€™ll go with: Lakisha, Jordin, Melinda, Sabrina, Gina, and Anotonella. If she doesnâ€™t get kicked out of the competition first. And no, she was horrible last week. But she looks good, so thatâ€™s why sheâ€™ll make it.
-In case you havenâ€™t seen, there are numerous pictures floating around the internet of Antonella being, well, a slut. Topless, wet t-shirt, posing with all her girlfriends topless, lying on a bed with see through lingerie, etc. Yeah, itâ€™s all there. And of course for good measure, some X-rated ones of her going down on some guy. I question whether or not those are actually her, but the other ones definitely are. Nice going, Antonella. Iâ€™m sure your parents are proud. The most recent pictures just popped up on Friday, so if Fox decides to boot her from the show, you can replace her with Haley, whoâ€™s probably the cutest girl in the competition. And she just got engaged. Awwwwwâ€¦.how cute. It wonâ€™t last.
-A bit of quick advice for Chris Richardson, the Justin Timberlake wannabe. I donâ€™t know much about music and singing and performing, but son, you have got to stop doing the look-a-way when you sing. Watch carefully. The guy quick turns away from the mike on almost every other line he sings. And even when you watch him in the background dancing to others songs, he still does it. That nervous tick is going to get him booted from the show. I honestly donâ€™t think he can control doing it. But once you start noticing it week in and week out, youâ€™ll wish heâ€™d stop too. And Blake Lewisâ€™ beat-boxing will keep him in the show for a long time. I know people will argue that what heâ€™s doing isnâ€™t singing, but neither were Taylor Hicksâ€™ crazy gyrations and look where that got him. Blake will be the last guy left in this competition because he canâ€™t beat box and brings something different to the table. Now, that doesnâ€™t mean heâ€™s gonna be in the final two, I just said heâ€™d be the last guy left standing.
-Another thing to keep your eye out for? The parents. One of my favorite things to do while watching performances is to watch the parents groove along to their childs song. Because inevitably, not a single one of them is in rhythm. Iâ€™ve yet to see a parent in rhythm with their childs song in six seasons of this show. Youâ€™d think theyâ€™d be able to clap their hands together with the sound of the beat, but no. Theyâ€™re totally off. And Chris Richardsonâ€™s dad is a complete spaz. Heâ€™s gonna hurt himself trying to dance to his son performing. Iâ€™m actually scared for him. And sometimes you donâ€™t even have to narrow it down to just the parents. A lot of people in the audience canâ€™t groove to any of these songs either. I usually start looking for this about 30 seconds into each performance, since by that time, I know if I think itâ€™s going well or not. So to keep my interest, I look for other things to hold my amusement. And the parents always seem to do the trick.
-It is really disappointing that there is zero eye candy left on this show. Some interesting characters, but for the life of me, outside of Michelle the Asian girl, Iâ€™m having a hard time watching these women run around in their bathing suits. Blech. Even Rita coming out of her top last week did nothing for me. Maybe Stephanie LaGrossa can come back on the show for a third time. Or Heidi. Or Jenna. Hey, I have an idea, letâ€™s have an All-Star Survivor but just with all the good looking ones. Someone can yank Elizabeth Hasselbeck out of her â€œViewâ€ seat for a couple months, canâ€™t they? Rosie hates her anyway. And Amber can be on her 12th reality show in the last 3 years as well. I think itâ€™s a brilliant idea. Too bad no one will listen to me.
-So I havenâ€™t read too deep into any spoilers this season, although I do know that at some point, both Immunity Idols are found AND they are both played at Tribal Council. Not like Yul last year who never gave it up or ever had to play it. It gets played twice this year. Looking forward to that. And then of course, the big monster boffo socko thing that supposedly â€œeveryone will be talking aboutâ€ happens later in the season. I donâ€™t know what it is, who it revolves around, or what effect it has on the game, but whatever it is, I guarantee it doesnâ€™t top Johnny Fairplay lying about his grandmother. As big of a weasel and lunatic as that guy is, for my money, thatâ€™s the best lie ever told on this show. He had everyone fooled. He probably shouldâ€™ve won that season too. Yeah, like Sandra or Lilian (the final two) had any business being there. Are you kidding me? Please tell me that season never happened.
GREASE: YOUâ€™RE THE ONE THAT I WANT
-So, this show is raising the bar on corniness on a weekly basis. Outstanding stuff, really. I mean, can anything possibly top the duet performances from last week? Iâ€™m serious. Didnâ€™t you just feel the chemistry between those couples through your TV set? Uhhhh, yeah, me neither. Just because they were dancing close to each other and singing into each others faces, weâ€™re supposed to think thereâ€™s chemistry there? And now Allie supposedly has a crush on Max? That single handedly made me throw up my dinner last Sunday night. Very disturbing. She should be disqualified just for that. Max looks like every single theatre dork I went to high school with who had a part in every school play put on. And heâ€™s about as convincing as Danny Zucko as I am. Although, I can belt out a mean â€œSummer Nightsâ€. Ok. No, I canâ€™t.
– â€œAmerican Idolâ€ revealed who their guest celebrities are going to be this season: Jennifer Lopez, Gwen Stefani, Martina McBride, Jon Bon Jovi, and Diana Ross. And thereâ€™s still that rumor going around that Michael Jackson is gonna make an appearance. So who has helped out on â€œGreaseâ€ this season? Andrew Lloyd Weber, Jon Secada, and Frankie Avalon. Weber isnâ€™t a bad name considering he has â€œPhantomâ€ to his credit. Although, someone might want to teach him how to clap. And keep him away from heat lamps. He might melt. Jon Secada was brought on as a judgeâ€¦.why? Oh yeah, he had that hit song 20 years ago. How could I forget? And he played Danny Zucko in â€œGreaseâ€ before. So Danny Zucko was Cuban? Really? Huh. Couldâ€™ve fooled me. So when is Shakira gonna be cast as Sandy?
-Frankie Avalon just isnâ€™t what he used to be, huh? Goodness gracious. How come he canâ€™t sing â€œBeauty School Drop Outâ€ anymore? That was terrible. I shouldâ€™ve been tipped off to this when I heard Olivia Newton John couldnâ€™t sing any of the songs 30 years later either. Can I request something? How about a moratorium on every singer from the original â€œGreaseâ€ trying to re-create the songs now? Is that too much to ask? Let us remember you when you could sing, when your face wasnâ€™t all shot up, and when you were in your prime. Iâ€™m half expecting next week weâ€™re gonna see a stoned, drunk, and coked out Jeff Conaway reprise his Kenickie role and belt out â€œGreased Lightningâ€ before keeling over and dying on us.
-Have you noticed the giant change in the showâ€™s format? When they first started hyping the show, the concept was that it would be like â€œIdolâ€ and America would vote off one guy and one girl every week. Uhhhhhhhâ€¦.not so much. Of course, after the season starts, they realize this could be a major catastrophe if say, Maxâ€™s family started flooding the phone lines and somehow he ended up winning, and now theyâ€™re forced to put a high school reject on Broadway. So conveniently they threw in there, â€œOh by the way, your votes will only decide the winners. The judges will send home whoever they damn well please every week so we donâ€™t have a huge screw up in the end, and only 5 people buy tickets when the show hits Broadway again. But thanks for not noticing and causing an uproar.â€ So tell us, why are you even giving the phone numbers out then? Just to lower the contestants self esteem by letting them know those two imparticular are least liked by the audience? Very nice.
-Not only was I creeped out by the duet performances, I found it rather insulting that Max was trying to cop a feel on Ashley. This is â€œGreaseâ€ people. Danny Zucko got nowhere near Sandyâ€™s pants until the very end. And even then I bet it took him hours to get those spandex off. The whole concept of â€œGreaseâ€ is actually kinda funny when you think about it. Danny canâ€™t like Sandy because heâ€™s a T-bird, and sheâ€™s a prude. And getting to first base is a huge step for her. But by the end of the movie, she realizes the only way to Dannyâ€™s shallow heart, is to trick herself up to look like a whore, learn to smoke, slide into some skin tight clothing, and gyrate all over him. Walla! Now he likes her. So rule of thumb to all you high school prudes: If you want to attract the hot guy, whore yourself out. And be prepared to be groped at the drive-in.
-Whoâ€™s going to win this thing? Beats the hell out of me. Despite the huge negative points she should receive for having a crush on Max, Allie wonâ€™t win. So Iâ€™ll go with Ashley still despite the â€œBoots are Made for Walkinâ€™â€ performance last night. And that unbiased paid audience they roll in there every Sunday night seems to take a liking toâ€¦wellâ€¦everybody. Chad and Austin might be a bit too metro to be Danny, but then again, so are all the others. If I remember correctly, Danny used to grease his hair. Austin seems to style his with about a can of hair spray a day. I cannot look at that guy without getting queasy. You would think itâ€™d be impossible to be overly dramatic on this show. Uhhh, no. Not for Austin. He has daytime soap hunk written all over him. I might protest if he wins. And in case you hadnâ€™t heard, David Ianâ€™s own money is on the line. If the audience fails, then the show will fail. Heâ€™s taking a big risk. Thank you David. So kind.
-Itâ€™s been a couple weeks, so we have a few things to go over. First and foremost, that somehow Trump managed to get the Lakers coaching staff and a few players to make a cameo on this abortion of a show. Do you honestly think that Phil Jackson, owner of nine NBA championship rings, and coach to two or three of the greatest players the NBA has ever seen, wanted to conduct a practice with a gaggle of â€˜tards from a reality show? Oh lord. He mustâ€™ve gotten a hefty appearance fee for that one. By far my favorite moment of the season to date was when Muna, the Jamaican chick, told us that it was â€œthe brill of a lifetime for be to beet Bil Jackson.â€ I bet it was. Growing up on the island of Jamaica, what better role model for a young girl like Muna than Phil Jackson. Thatâ€™s inspiration for you. High comedy.
-Every year the Donald does something that, even by his standards, comes across as the most self-serving thing Iâ€™ve ever seen. Well, he one-upped himself this season. Tell me he didnâ€™t take a phone call live right after he was done giving a speech at one of those Learning Annexes. That didnâ€™t happen, right? Something tells that was all dubbed in later. I mean, he probably gets paid close a to a mil for a speaking engagement, yet when heâ€™s done, heâ€™s going to take a live phone call from his D-rated reality TV show so he can promote it even further? And since the people in the audience had no idea which team was which, why were they cheering? Oh thatâ€™s right, because the cue cards told them to. How could I be so dumb?
-Looks like next week we finally get an appearance from Randall, our season 4 winner. Long time, no see Randall. Hope your job is treating you well. Have you been moved up to coffee fetcher yet, or are you still copy machine paper re-filler guy? And where the hell is Ivanka? I thought the whole season we were getting her in the boardroom? I think Sean has made just as many appearances as her. Thereâ€™s something wrong with that. Hell, Sean even got to RUN the boardroom once while Trump was out. No doubt Sean is becoming quite the Trump ass kisser. I bet he even has his own cubicle. Look, do what needs to be done Donald, get your daughters hot piece back in the boardroom before your ratings dip below any program on the CW. And oh yeah, itâ€™s time slot got bumped to 10:00 now on Sunday nights. Good luck with that.
-In six seasons of this show, you know what Iâ€™ve never, ever, ever understood? Supposedly these are the smartest of the smarts in their profession. We all know that theyâ€™re not, but for the sake of the argument, humor me here. There somewhat intelligent based on their business savvy. Yet every single project manager of a losing team, or some member of the losing team, performs so horribly below human standards, that they are the biggest liability the show has ever seen. I understand the need for Trump to fire someone every episode, but how come we canâ€™t have one task where both teams do unbelievably well, one team barely wins, and the losing team has no one to snipe at the in the boardroom. Is that possible? You mean every single task, someone is that much of a f*** up that they got on everyone elseâ€™s nerves? But thatâ€™s TV for yaâ€™.
-Last weekâ€™s task was an interesting one for the sole reason that I used to shop at that Westfield Shopping Center on numerous occasions. And Derek apparently screwed up by not telling Aimee the percentage of Hispanics that shopped there. He found out it was about 50%, yet didnâ€™t bother to tell his project manager. Iâ€™m here to tell you, that is far from the truth. Derek was given false information. Whoever told him that mall was 50% Hispanic shoppers couldnâ€™t have been more off. Try about 75%. Then again, it is smack dab in the middle of L.A., so what did you expect? Caucasians? Please. Theyâ€™re a minority.
BEAUTY AND THE GEE
-Didnâ€™t write about this show all season, or the past two seasons for that matter, but just know its actually one of the better ones out there. I mean, whatâ€™s not to like about a geek who says, â€œIf I had to choose between a woman and Star Trek, Iâ€™d choose Star Trek.â€ Priorities, baby. I really hope someday I donâ€™t have to choose between those two. As much as it would pain me to not have Scotty beam me up, I think Iâ€™d have to choose women. Now, if you present me with â€œDawsonâ€™s Creek marathon vs. a womanâ€, there could be some hesitation before I ultimately choose Joey Potterâ€¦.I meanâ€¦.women.
-According to a recent interview with Megan, part of the winning team with Scooter, she not only verifies that Jennylee was into Nate, but contends they had sex when the cameras werenâ€™t around. Nate officially has to be crowned king of the geeks if he was able to pull this off. He banged Jennylee? Are you serious? The guy whoâ€™s the lead singer in a band that sings Star Wars songs nailed a UFC ring girl? How much money was exchanged? Did she lose a bet? Was he wearing his storm trooper costume and she didnâ€™t know it was him? If Megan is telling the truth, and if Nate was actually able to copulate with a warm, living, female body, I think we all should give him a well deserved standing ovation. Pretty much is the equivalent of Lewis somehow getting into Bettyâ€™s pants in â€œRevenge of the Nerdsâ€. I still donâ€™t know how that happened. And donâ€™t think that was just a one time thing where he tricked her. In â€œRevenge of the Nerds 3â€, they were married. Thatâ€™s just plain wrong. â€œIâ€™m getting tired of Betty.â€ â€œHow could you get tired of that ass, Takashi?â€ An all-time classic.
-Which brings us to our beloved, Cece. Reality television has been going strong for a good 5-6 years now. And weâ€™ve seen a lot of crazy/psycho/slutty/evil/manipulative/stupid people that have appeared on these shows. Hell, Iâ€™ve written about practically all of them at some point or another. But I think itâ€™s safe to say that Cece is by far the most despicable, shallow, self-centered, phony, most egomaniacal, disillusioned person Iâ€™ve ever seen on television. And those are her good traits. Name calling doesnâ€™t even do what I think of her justice. If you saw the show, you know exactly what Iâ€™m talking about. All I know is karma is a bitch, and I hope someday that whore gets what she deserves, which is nothing good. I hate you Cecille, and Iâ€™m glad you guys didnâ€™t win. There. Iâ€™m off my soapbox.
-Yet another couple weeks of shows to get caught up on here too, starting with the one where Emily the Super Intern made her appearance. Kinda put LC in her place, didnâ€™t she? LC takes a couple fashion classes and works at Teen Vogue and seems constantly stressed out. Emily was able to juggle all those and then some without missing a beat. Looks like LC has some catching up to do in the â€œworking-for-a-livingâ€ department. And why did Emily give the double-kiss-to-the-cheek when she met LC and Whitney? Someone tell her this is L.A. and not Paris. But donâ€™t worry LC, it wonâ€™t be long before Emily ends up in a sex tape, or gossip mag, or so strung out on drugs and depressed, sheâ€™ll shave her head.
-Sponge Bob Square Spencer was at it again this week. Calling him a massive tool would be doing a disservice to tools. He makes it clear to Heidi that she is #1 in his book. What he forgets to tell her is that he has a â€œ1Aâ€ list which consists of every hooker playmate that visitâ€™s the â€œAreaâ€ nightclub when heâ€™s there and Heidiâ€™s not. I just donâ€™t understand why this guy is fighting so hard for a girl he doesnâ€™t really give two sh*** about. Heâ€™s got all of Brodyâ€™s sloppy seconds, plus another boatload of tramps he can pick from when he goes out, based on what we see. But Heidi is his one true love? I donâ€™t get it. Then again, Iâ€™m not twenty years old. Maybe Iâ€™m not supposed to get it. Gotta love how Heidi spends all episode ignoring his phone calls, having her friends tell her what awful douche bag he is, then by the end of the episode, sheâ€™s back in his car with him for a night of sex. As bad as Spencer is coming across in this show, Heidi looks much, much worse.
-This show should be renamed â€œHeidiâ€™s Hills – starring that girl who used to be on â€˜Laguna Beachâ€™â€. Of course thereâ€™s the saying for guys of â€œBros before Hoâ€™sâ€ which weâ€™ve all heard before. Isnâ€™t there a similar one for girls? Something to the effect of â€œDonâ€™t shun your friends to date complete man whores when theyâ€™re all telling you not toâ€? I understand sheâ€™s a teenager, I understand this is her first real love (I think), and I understand sheâ€™s a naÃ¯ve little soul, but why do you stay with someone who makes you completely miserable? You tell him you donâ€™t like him hitting on other girls when youâ€™re out, and what does he do? He hits on other girls when youâ€™re out. Whereâ€™s the logic in that? I guess I should just stop preaching to Heidi and let her learn the hard way. I think she needs to walk in on Sponge Bob Square Spencer in the middle of a menage a tois, then maybe sheâ€™ll get the picture. Or not.
REAL WORLD: DENVER
-I canâ€™t believe Iâ€™ve yet to write about this season. Definitely a cast of crazies. Since thereâ€™s been about 10 episodes, itâ€™d be impossible to go over all the crazy things that have happened. So letâ€™s break down each character and what theyâ€™ve managed to bring to the show.
JENN: Promiscuity. Nothing says â€œIâ€™m a gigantic slutâ€ than boinking one of your roommates your first night in the house. Very classy, Jenn. I bet youâ€™ll find it very hard to believe that Jenn actually uttered this sentence earlier this season: â€œIâ€™ve never been able to stay faithful to any of my boyfriends.â€ You donâ€™t say? Couldâ€™ve fooled me. Or this one: â€œAlcohol does crazy things. Iâ€™m not attracted to Alex. I wouldnâ€™t sleep with Alex sober.â€ And of course, last week, a drunken Jenn did Alex – again. The next time I hear a woman use alcohol as an excuse for her behaviorâ€¦..forget it. Before a vein comes shooting out of my head, Iâ€™ll stop.
TYRIE: A calm demeanor. You always need that guy every season who never flies off the handle, is level headed, and rationally works out all disagreements with his roommates in a very calm, collected manner. Ummmmm, thatâ€™s not Tyrie. When someone gets sent to the hospital on this naked beasts accord, just remember who warned you.
COLIE: Horniness. The self-proclaimed â€œkissing slutâ€ surely hasnâ€™t failed to live up to that reputation. That tongue has been in more guyâ€™s mouths this season than I can count. Sheâ€™s making out with Alex on the first night, then sheâ€™s snuggling up to her Outward Bound boss, then some random at the bar, and now her boyfriend comes to visit and sheâ€™s in love again. Someone swab her tongue for an STD.
STEPHEN: Rage. Ok, maybe not. Take what I said about Tyrie and insert it here. Why do they have to cast normal people on this show? Ruins the fun of it. Ok, so maybe he doesnâ€™t understand the gay lifestyle. And maybe he cheated on his girlfriend, but, he actually apologized for it and felt bad about it. What Real Worldâ€™er has ever done that? I didnâ€™t think you were allowed to. In fact, I thought just the opposite. After cheating, youâ€™re supposed to rub it in your boy/girl friends face and say you just need your space.
DAVIS: A lot of gay. Theyâ€™ve always had at least one gay cast member for the last I-donâ€™t-know-how-many seasons. But for Davis, I guess they told him, â€œLook, we want you to do everything possible with your boyfriend when he comes to visit, and we promise weâ€™ll air it. ALL of it.â€ I wouldnâ€™t know if he and his boyfriend have anything in common other than having sex with each other. Thatâ€™s all they seem to do. And oh yeah, shower together too. At least Stephen is learning that gay people are just as horny as the rest of us.
BROOKE: Lunacy. Currently battling Cece from â€œBeauty and the Geekâ€ for most annoying reality TV female. I can deal with Jenn being a slut and spreading her legs for whoever walks by her. And I can even deal with Colie and her disease infested mouth. But Brookeâ€™s fits of rage really seem to get under my skin. Especially when theyâ€™re all her fault. Probably the best moment of the season thus far was the conversation she had with her mom the first time she blew a gasket.
Brooke: â€œI canâ€™t believe Iâ€™m still paying $700 rent back in L.A. and not even living there.â€
Mom: â€œHoney, what are you talking about? You pay $438.â€
Brooke: â€œNot with all my utilities and water and power and electricity.â€
Mom: â€œHoney, we pay that.â€
Brooke: â€œWell, whatever. You know what I mean.â€
Actually, I donâ€™t know what you mean other than youâ€™re a spoiled brat who canâ€™t lift a finger for herself. And she must be living in a dump if sheâ€™s got a place somewhere in LA for $700 month. Are you kidding me? What freeway is she living under? Brooke, I suggest you clean up after yourself, quit wearing ankle braces when youâ€™re wearing heels, and shutup every once in a while. Iâ€™d love for the whole house to gang up on her so sheâ€™s quit, but you know it wonâ€™t happen. By the last episode, sheâ€™ll come full circle, love all her roommates, and will learn to throw her own garbage away. Congrats, Brooke. You are an inspiration to many others out there.
-With all that said, you gotta feel just a little bit sorry for this seasons cast, donâ€™t you? I mean, look at the last 7 or 8 seasons of the â€œReal Worldâ€ and the jobs that the cast was given: Tanning salons, doing a documentary, working for an Arena League Football team, producing a Â½ hour TV show a week, etc. And what do these kids get stuck with? Climbing 12,000 foot mountains and leading tours of children to do the same. Huh? Howâ€™s that fair? Iâ€™d be pissed if I were them. Wow. They actually have to work. Well, except if your name is Brooke or Stephen. Then you just make up lame excuses to not work so you can go get a mani and pedi. Good one, Brooke. I can see why youâ€™re so loved by your roommates.