Reality Steve


Reality Roundup 3/15/10 Including a Vegas Interview, “Idol” Thoughts, & an Anniversary

Back after an almost two-week hiatus, we’ve got a few things to discuss. Namely, what happened on the Vegas trip, the Rozlyn sex tape, my thoughts on Jason and Molly’s wedding, the Top 12 of “American Idol”, and what 2-year anniversary is today. Yes, I realize the ABC’s “20/20” fluff piece on the “Bachelor” airs tonight, but I will cover that in Wednesday’s column, which will have a recap of Tuesday’s “Idol” performances. So you can expect a column every Wednesday from here on out as I give my opinions on each of the previous nights performances, followed by who I think SHOULD go home vs. who I think WILL go home. And the way this season has gone so far, it seems like anyone can go home any week, so it might be a little tougher. Lets get started.

One of the first things I did when I got to Vegas was conduct an interview with RawVegas.TV. Thanks to “Chops” for setting this up at Caesars Palace and getting this done. Funny thing was, we did this interview right outside the Poker room at the Sportsbook while a tournament was going on inside. So there were a few fans standing outside waiting for some of their favorite poker players to come straggling out. All the sudden I’m being interviewed and there were certain people who thought I was actually some famous poker player. Not quite. Boy, were they disappointed. Anyway, as you can see, the interview was edited a bit (down to nine minutes from about thirty minutes), but I have no complaints about what was shown. Hell, I was probably rambling anyway so they needed to shut me up somehow. A few thoughts after the link:

Watch Steve Carbone Talks About The Bachelor on

-After doing this, it now brings my total number of interviews I’ve ever done on camera to three: Once in high school after I hit the game winner to beat Katella (a major highlight for a then 6’2″, 165 lb scrawny white kid), the Skype interview I did last July with “Extra” TV, and now this. So needless to say, I need a little work on my interviewing skills.

-Ummmm, I tend to close my eyes a lot when I’m thinking. That needs to stop. Hell, it was even annoying me. It’s like I’m Crystal Bowersox when she sings.

-At the end, “Chops” asked me if I’d do the “Bachelor” for a million dollars. Honestly, I didn’t hear the part about a millon dollars until I watched it back. I just heard “would you be the Bachelor”? Of course if I was offered a million dollars I’d be the next “Bachelor”. Not only that, I’d do whatever the script told me to do. Please. That’s a no-brainer. Everyone’s got a price.

-However, lets remember that I will never appear on this show in any capacity for these reasons:

1) They know who I am, so they’d never offer it to me in the first place (or to even be one of the 25 bachelors competing for the “Bachelorette”)
2) I don’t fit the mold of what they’re looking for. Don’t have an agent, or publicist, 6-pack abs, never modeled, nor am I looking to start a television career
3) The minute I appeared on that show would officially be the end of, and frankly, I’m having way more fun writing and making fun of this show than I would if I were on it
4) Bottom line: They have no interest in ever casting me, and I would have no interest in ever being on their show

-Some of you may have seen my tweet and Facebook status regarding the event planned Saturday night at TAO while in Vegas. I have personally apologized to most of them, but I’m gonna take this time to apologize again. The deal was I had wristbands to get people into the club with no line and no cover. Which was a good thing since considering by the time I showed up at 11pm that Saturday night, the line wrapped around the building and I was able to get right in. And with over 80 people having picked up wristbands, I think most of them at some point or another, ended up getting into the club. The problem was, it was dark, loud, and ridiculously crowded. From the minute I got in, I had people texting me, “I’m here, where are you?” So of the 80 or so people I gave wristbands to, I think I maybe saw 10 of them while inside the club. It was PACKED. I just misplanned the whole thing. The event should’ve been outside somewhere at the pool, or maybe had a dinner or something. Oh well. I learned my lesson. It was fun nonetheless, and I at least got to meet most of them when I gave out the wristbands, but once again, I sincerely apologize to everyone for misplanning that event. Won’t happen next time. And there will be a next time. I’m thinking we might do it again in September since I’ll be there for the first weekend of NFL season like I am every year.

Some other quick Vegas thoughts:

-A very nice “You’re welcome” to the two women who came out from Chicago and Cleveland respectively who I taught how to play craps. I say “You’re welcome” since without me, you wouldn’t have walked home with all those winnings. Always fun teaching those who don’t know how to play, only to then watch them turn around and win more money than you. So, it’s a begrudging “You’re welcome”.

-Gotta also thank the four ladies from Chicago who came out to celebrate one of their friends birthdays for introducing me to “the rock” at Japonais restaurant. That was some good sh**. I’m still trying to figure out how a rock stays at 500 degrees for 6-7 minutes. More like 2 or 3 minutes.

-What Vegas trip wouldn’t be complete without seeing some dbags walking around in scripted t-shirts. I couldn’t memorize all of them, but one of the most memorable ones said something about how he had a 10″ package and there would be an oral exam later. You stay classy, Vegas.

-I also want to thank every Asian dealer that weekend who felt the need to rape my wallet every chance they could get. Appreciate it. But I guess I’m the idiot for continuing to sit down at their table. Silly me.

-Best “Vegas” Moment: So I’m playing blackjack at a table in Caesars right after I did the RawVegas.TV interview, and it’s just me and female dealer. All the sudden, two guys walk over from the bar, a little buzzed, probably in their mid to late 20’s, sit down, and seemed a bit frustrated. They then ask the dealer, “Where can we go in this town to meet some women who aren’t prostitutes and we’re not gonna have to pay for it?” They were dead serious.
So essentially they were asking where all the loose women are that you won’t find on the cards they pass out to you while you walk the streets. Nice. It’s as if there’s just one particular place all the drunk, horny, floozies in Vegas go just to get hit on by guys and go home with them. Hey guys, how about you try, oh I don’t know, ANY place on the strip? It was hilarious how frustrated they were that apparently they couldn’t find anyone to sleep with them who wouldn’t charge their credit card. Only in Vegas. Good thing they got off my table because they brought the mood down. Only table I won at all weekend.

-And no, that was not an Affliction or Ed Hardy shirt I had on. Please. I wouldn’t be caught dead wearing one of those. I’m a little more metro than that…ha ha. I think it was Calvin Klein.

Rozlyn Sex Tape

-I’m sure most of you have heard by now, but as suspected, the Rozlyn sex tape was bogus. From the beginning, I kind of had an idea that this was just a way for some porn website to drive some attention to their name, and it was. Pretty funny how when the story broke the night before I did the interview with her, and her agent called to tell me under no circumstances were we allowed to bring it up in the interview, the haters immediately screamed “guilty” because, according to their logic, “if she never made a sex tape, why wouldn’t she just deny it?” Well, what if she denied it, yet a tape came out that was done without her knowledge? There’s enough sleazeballs in this world that have no problem having a buddy get closet time while him and his girlfriend get it on. If she says she never did one, then one shows up without her knowledge, she looks like a liar. So better to have her not make a statement at all rather than possibly incriminate herself, you know? Plus, Rozlyn’s side did make a statement about the tape right after the story broke saying, “We have no knowledge of any tape.” Yet that wasn’t good enough for some people who wanted to believe she did this.

I loved how a lot of people were like, “Well, if TMZ is running it, it MUST be true.” Uh huh. Sure it was. Look, do the tabloid shows and magazines once in a while break a story? Yes. All the time? Not even close. I’d say they miss on 75% of the stories they run with. Their job is to get you to read their magazine or watch their show, so they will draw you in with whatever headline they choose. I don’t know how many of you actually saw that sex tape, but it was laughable. How anyone could’ve seen that and said, “Yep, that’s Rozlyn”, is an idiot. It looked nothing like her. So now here we are three months later and everything Rozlyn has been accused of has kinda been swept under the rug, hasn’t it?

1) The show says she has a romantic, physical relationship with a producer, yet there’s still no audio or video proof of it yet to be shown
2) At the “Women Tell All”, girls talk of witnessing things between the two in a stairwell, and on a couch, yet, have nothing to back it up with, and now some are even re-canting their stories saying they felt pressured to go along with what producers were telling them to say
3) A sex tape supposedly with her in it turns out to be a complete farce and just something to grab peoples attention

Kind of a crazy world we live in. Sure, people can get away with throwing “Rozlyn Papa/Sex Tape” accusations out there with no repercussions, but I think enough has been proven at this point that she is not the villain they’ve made her out to be. When Lexington Steele is actually coming to your defense, then you know your life has been turned upside down. Lexington Steele is the name of the guy whose giant hammer was in the porn that the Rozlyn look-a-like was having lunch on. The clip was taken from a 2004 video he starred in where, basically, he had sex with a bunch of women. Some perv was watching it someday, decided since Rozlyn’s name was in the news, he could float it out there that she was in it, and it’d draw people to his site. Which I’m sure it did. Glad he accomplished his goal. Sorry I’m sticking up for Rozlyn yet again, but that’s just wrong. Nothing will happen to the guy, nothing will happen to TMZ, all the haters who swore by this story and believed it was true go back into hiding, and she gets more people thinking she’s a whore. It sucks. Final thought: Whoever thought a fake name like Lexington Steele would end up in porn? Shocking, really.

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  1. aimeenp

    March 15, 2010 at 9:16 AM

    I too like Didi the most…she is gorgeous and has a very current voice. I really also liked Lilly Scott, bc i dig the indie vibe. Bowersox is not indie, she is trapped in the Melissa Etheridge, Four Non Blondes, 90’s! Ugh, if she sings “What’s Up” I am gonna die. I can’t stand her. Oh well.

    Siobhan is an old Irish Name. It’s not very common, but it isnt some made up name or anything. I think it looks beautiful, but it sounds like a lady who works in a diner.

    Andrew Garcia is awesome, but he needs to do better than Genie in a Bottle…i couldn’t help but think he was asking someone to polish his knob….on live TV…sick! He needs to sing his style of Hit Me Baby One More Time. My friend used to do a version of that song with a guitar that was really good.

    I am sorry, but Casey James IS hot. I need to get to Ft. Worth if every guys looks like him there. When i was in Ft. Worth, the only thing I noticed was that EVERY girl had at least 1 Bump It in her hair. That and you can smoke in the bars there still…i am not used to that anymore.

  2. JenniferC

    March 15, 2010 at 11:02 AM

    Thanks for the updates Steve 🙂

    I thought you would of mentioned Nicki being at Jason and Molly’s wedding… didn’t you have a crush on her??? How sweet about Maddie… congrats to you both!

  3. indifferent

    March 15, 2010 at 11:50 AM

    About your dog Maddie, my husband always says….if you lock your wife in the trunk of a car, or your dog, which one is happy to see you?

  4. bigpoppaevil

    March 15, 2010 at 2:30 PM

    Steve I’m gonna call you to task on one thing. When TMZ broke the ‘sex tape’ story, they didn’t outright claim it was Rozlyn. They said there was someone claiming it was Rozlyn, and they were investigating. Then they came out and said it wasn’t. Don’t just read the headlines, dude.

  5. Caroll

    March 15, 2010 at 4:14 PM

    I noticed Nicki was sitting beside Kipton at the wedding. And the white covered seats made the scene look like a graveyard when it was first photographed! The most interesting part was seeing the former Bachelor/ette couples in attendance!

  6. macturner

    March 15, 2010 at 6:17 PM

    Gender: Feminine
    Usage: Irish
    Pronounced: shi-VAWN [key]
    Irish form of Jehanne, a Norman French variant of JEANNE.

  7. kathimcgraw

    March 16, 2010 at 6:52 AM

    Wow! “every Asian dealer”?! Was that comment necessary – sounded racist to me!

  8. dori

    March 16, 2010 at 10:27 AM

    Nice to see you back Steve!

  9. Bachelorfake

    March 16, 2010 at 10:28 AM

    Steve, did you use Purell after leaving the blackjack table with the two male whores at it?

    I agree 100% with Steve that the bride and groom should spend their bachelor and bachelorette parties SEPARATELY for crying out loud. You’ll have more than enough time to learn to hate each others faces from spending time together forEVER.

    Keep up the great blog! This is one of a handful of sites that I visit regularly.

  10. realityaddict

    March 16, 2010 at 10:49 AM

    Siobhan is a great traditional Irish name. I love that her family kept the Gaelic spelling rather than Americanize it to “Shavonne.”

  11. jessica1

    March 16, 2010 at 11:54 AM

    Congrats on 2-years-of-Maddie!

    I can’t remember what was so “special” about Charlie & Sarah’s finale? Anyone remember?

    Will be interesting to read your post on the 20/20 special. Completely as you predicted; a self-love fest. But omg, that Mike Fleiss is creepy when he comments how great it was for TV for them to “let Brad blow those two girls out of the water”. And especially hilarious how they profiled Ali as this simple, small goals girl who just fell into reality tv.

  12. lemon-lime

    March 16, 2010 at 1:49 PM

    Don’t you know that American Idol is just as staged as the bachelor/ette? I’m sure you’ve heard of the site they are sort of like you and the bachelor/ette: vftw exposes AI for the farce it is, as well as poke fun at the contestants. Crystal is the least fake contestant this year, as well as the best.
    Not surprised that the Roz sex tape turned out to be a big hullaballo over nothing. I just wonder why all the Roz haters that usually troll this site suddenly have nothing to say.

  13. bigpoppaevil

    March 16, 2010 at 2:08 PM

    No, lemon-lime, VFTW encourages people to vote for the worst contestant. They only “expose” the flaw in the voting system. If it was ‘staged’, they wouldn’t give people the power to vote, and leave the decision up to the judges.

  14. longing

    March 16, 2010 at 4:04 PM

    Reality Steve

    Glad you had a nice break in Vegas. After all of the Celebrity Drama you encountered with The Bachelor this season – you deserved a break.

    Although I do feel sorry for you – having to come back from a wonderful time – to Jason and Molly’s wedding……….who cares??? The guy is a schmuck and she is no better for becoming his wife. Certainly was not on my television that night. I fear for that little boy…………..what will his father instill in him with regards to values?

    Now on to other things.

    Do you happen to know of any web sites where the Intelligent Public can comment on the debacle that is now known as Jake and Vienna?


    I have searched the net and cannot find any sites where the viewing public can tell ABC how disgusting the outcome of this season was. Believe me, I have tried.

    Oh how I wish I had the technological skills to create a web site for those of us who are totally disgusted with this season of The Bachelor. Vienna is a skank and for ABC to allow Jake to choose her……… it is going to be the networks downfall.

    And then, too add insult to injury – they put him on Dancing With The Stars.

    Ah, HELLO! Since when is he a STAR!!

  15. lemon-lime

    March 16, 2010 at 5:10 PM

    Bigpoppaevil: peruse vftw’s archives regarding AI’s cattle call, and plants. The site has much more than you say.

  16. lemon-lime

    March 16, 2010 at 5:24 PM

    Never mind bigpoppaevil. After rereading your post, I’ve come to the conclusion you’ll never believe the truth about AI. But to the others, if vftw puts you off, simply google american idol auditions and read the thousands of horror stories. Only a very small fraction gets to the celebrity judges, the process in each city takes days. The worst, most embarrassing ‘singers’ will be put through, while talented people aren’t let past the first 1st round. Because think about it, how funny are those first few episodes where people who think they can sing but cant- isn’t it so funny to watch those people make fools of themselves? There are numerous rounds before you make it to the celebrity judges. Meanwhile, producers make crowds of auditioners perform dozens of takes for those stupid group montages you see. Anybody who shows the least amount of fatigue is sent home. Through this, a few plants seemingly skip through several rounds of auditions. These are the people with friends and family in high places. All what I just said and more. But don’t take my word for it.

  17. akey3912

    March 16, 2010 at 6:44 PM

    Casey James is HOT HOT HOT. super HOT!!!! I could look and listen to him all night 😛 I hope he wins but if he doesn’t then Crystal is my second choice. Diddi is boring!!!
    wierd girl is my third choice. She can sing and she is cute even tho she is a bit wierd. the only reason paige and Tim are still in, is because of VFTW. Tims fake surprise is getting on my nerves !!

    Gooooo Casey!

  18. lemon-lime

    March 16, 2010 at 7:05 PM

    Chrystal is too good for AI; she’s in a class by herself. I hope she can write songs as good as she can sing. Really she has no business being on a show as mainstream as AI, hopefully it won’t tarnish her too much.
    I can picture her being picked up by dylan on his rolling thunder tour way back in the day…

  19. liz897

    March 16, 2010 at 7:59 PM


    Loved the entire season of your blog. Totally funny, laugh out loud, and on the mark. Can’t wait for the next one. Might even have to start watching Idol for laughs in between. Keep up the great work. You are an excellent writer, and I have worked as a writer and managing editor for years. Totally great!

  20. jcrew617

    March 16, 2010 at 8:41 PM

    I’m curious if Rozlyn would be willing to sue anyone who defamed her. She might not be able to sue ABC or the producers, but she would definitely be able to sue any individuals who defamed her, such as Jessie or Chris H.

    On other shows, such as Real World, one contestant sued another one for throwing her suitcase in a pool and ruining her property. If you lied about another person and damaged their reputation, that should be grounds for defamation, so I think Roz should file some lawsuits if she really wants to prove she is innocent.

  21. lemon-lime

    March 16, 2010 at 10:06 PM

    Jcrew: I’m no lawyer, but as bigpoppaevil said, TMZ said that someone claimed it was Roz, not that it actually was her. It seems tabloids oftentimes insinuate and will not just outright say a claim is true..
    And then there’s that famous larry flynt ruling, which basically said anybody who is a public figure is open to ridicule and insinuations, and I do know judges don’t normally go against precedants

  22. Ibenjamin

    March 17, 2010 at 2:18 PM

    I missed the 20/20 special – does anyone know if there will be a rerun (and when) or if it’s available to watch somewhere online? I can’t find anything. Thanks!

  23. jorgiegirl

    March 18, 2010 at 11:36 AM

    Casey hot? Sure. But if he starts to think so, it’s all over. Part of his appeal is his believeability. Good enough to stay in the game? Nah, but it’s fun to fantasize, ooops…I mean “watch” him every week. As for Tim, he doesn’t have to fake surprise because he knows he needs to be in the shoes of whomever goes out ahead of him! But then he’s in the same pot with about 7 others.

    As for Siobhan, I read, I think on VFTW that she should have been called on her last high note screetch and voice breaks. I thought it was my TV signal breaking up but I see at least ONE other person heard it. And a listen back showed pitchiness. I like her weirdness, but, c’mon. Could have been MUCH better. And Simon should let up on Crystal. When you’re good you know it, just like when you’re bad (a.k.a. Tim) you know it. I liked the sign “Mama Sox”. Reminded me of another “Mama”…..Cass.

    Every season someone who you may think should be the winner has to go home early, but by no means does that mean their career is over. Just look back on the past seasons, and where are some of the winners and “losers”.

  24. Nobody

    March 18, 2010 at 3:01 PM

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