“Dancing with the Stars”
I was shocked to see that the show didn’t make any mention during Rob’s pre-dance package of his sister’s fake marriage, and how it was hard to concentrate this week, and how the family was holding together during these tough times, blah blah blah. But nope. ABC didn’t take the opportunity to pimp out the Kardashian clan even more by bringing it up. Well, unless you consider the numerous family shots they did in the audience after the dance, but, they do that every week. So they were ALL there supporting Rob except him, who was probably in hiding. Or, interviewing NBA players to see which one will be the next pawn in her life. Poor Kris Humphries. Gets Ray J and Reggie Bush’s sloppy thirds, thinks he’s hit the jackpot by trolling around with KK, only to realize he was a nobody and never stood a chance in that family. So sad. Oh well. On to the next victim.
In case you haven’t heard the great news (and unless you’re someone over 30 you probably don’t care), but the Fox Network has ordered two specials of “In Living Color” that will air sometime next year, and depending on how well it does in the ratings, it has the chance to get brought back full time. Keenan Ivory Wayans is back on board, and I’m sure old cast members will pay a visit. Jim Carrey? Probably not. But I’m guessing David Alan Grier and Tommy Davidson’s schedules aren’t too booked right now. Hey, you think they’ll bring back Carrie Ann, reprising her role as a Fly Girl? I sure hope so. Now, I’m the last person to tell women about fashion and how to wear their hair or how to dress, but Carrie Ann’s bangs were out of control Monday night. How did she even see through them? Is that a good look? I sure didn’t think it was, but hey, what the hell do I know?
I thought Hope’s night was doomed when right at the beginning of their dance, she opened the umbrella. Isn’t it bad luck to open an umbrella indoors? And with the beating those two have taken from the judges all season, I figured it was only gonna get worse. You know what else I’ve noticed during Maks and Hope’s pre-dance video packages? Maks LOVES wearing beanies. Like, all the time. Maybe it’s a dancer thing, but I can honestly say I’ve never worn a beanie in my life. Nor do I ever plan to. Sorry. They look dumb. Also, it was nice to see that the apple doesn’t fall to far from the tree in Maks family. Tell me his dad wasn’t wearing a vest with a t-shirt under it at dinner? Yes, he was. I wonder if Maks, Val, and dad all just swap vests and exchange them like chicks do with their wardrobes. What a tight knit family.
So Derek has already dumped Lauren Conrad? Damn. Are him and Mark Ballas in a race to see who can bang the most D-list celebs in Hollywood? Sure seems like it. Those guys go through women like underwear. Why do I get the sneaking suspicion that Derek and Mark secretly keep track of things like that, and have a point system for all the women they sleep with? Those two are practically joined at the hip in everything they do, so I’m guessing sharing women is not a novel concept to them. And why do I also think those two have seen each other naked? I just love how two weeks ago when you read stuff about Derek and Lauren dating, it talks about how much they compliment each other, and they love spending time together, and each one is so happy when the other is around – then two weeks later they’re done. I don’t think I can make this any clearer: There are very few relationships in Hollywood. Even the married ones. Sure, they might be married, but if you had a clue, or anyone ever had the balls, to write about what scum of the earth most people in Hollywood are behind closed doors, it would blow people’s minds. I’m a nobody, and I’ve got TONS of stories I’ve heard and seen when I lived in LA. It would blow your mind.
Saw the commercial during DWTS for Chris Harrison’s new game show “You Deserve It” that starts the night of the DWTS finale and airs for six weeks. Yes, they got a 6 episode order. And I’m pretty sure that’s all they’ll be getting. Plenty of game shows get orders during the holiday seasons because most networks aren’t running new episodes of scripted or non-scripted shows. Some will, but most won’t. That’s why they load up on the game shows and you’ll see like a week straight of new episodes of “Minute to Win it”, or “Deal or No Deal” during Christmas week when that show used to be on. “You Deserve It” is no different. They’re running six episodes during basically the last six weeks of the year. And considering the “Bachelor” starts the first Monday in Jan, then takes two months off before another 17-18 straight weeks of “Bachelor”-related programming (“Bachelorette” and “Bachelor Pad”), we won’t be seeing “You Deserve It” again for a while, if at all. Glad Chris Harrison needed to pick up a part-time job from that incredibly daunting and busy schedule the “Bachelor” gives him. Must be rough.
Sniff, sniff. So disappointed to see Nancy go. Such a cheerful, positive person that brightened up my television set every Monday and Tuesday night. Really a shame that she got a combined score of 44 out of 60, a full 16 points behind the leaders. 44 was probably 10 pts too high. You suck, Nancy. Good riddance. As for Tristan, now THAT was something that was must see TV on Monday nights. Especially when he would put Nancy in her place for a being a whiny, non-attentive beyotch. I would be shocked if Tristan isn’t brought back next season. The accent alone should get him a lifetime contract. Maybe next season, Tristan can replace Tom Bergeron, also sit in for Len on the judging panel, and be one of the dancers. And if there’s time, he can’t take over for Howard Wheeler as the musical director. If I were the producer, that’s what I would do. No doubt Tristan can handle four jobs. He’s a leprechaun. They can handle anything.
The Instant Dance thing is just ridiculous. Don’t we hear all the time about how difficult this show is, and how only having a week to learn a dance is next to impossible, yet, JR gets a 30 on a dance he had 10 minutes to learn? Huh? Not saying JR’s dance wasn’t great, because it was, but when you give that dance a 30, aren’t you diminishing any other dance that you gave a 30 which took the couples a week to practice for? And yes, I understand it’s a dance that the couple has already done before, but still, they don’t get their music until that night. To put together a “30” performance, you would think would be damn near next to impossible. Yet somehow, since they’ve incorporated the Instant Dance, someone ends up getting a 29 or 30. Just doesn’t seem right. At least Nancy sh** the bed and looked awful. That made me happy.
DWTS always has some interesting musical guests. And since Tuesday’s episodes are basically 60 minutes of fluff, they usually have to bring on two musical acts. Did you catch this past Tuesday’s? Granted, they didn’t perform together, but could you have found two more opposite and random performers than Andrea Bocelli and Flo-Rida? Huh? I’m guessing Flo-Rida doesn’t own any Bocelli CD’s and, well, something tells me Andrea Bocelli enjoyed doing a duet with Katharine McPhee more than he did being on the same episode as Flo-Rida. Totally bizarre.
Last night was definitely what I call a “throw away” episode. Happens every season. It’s when one tribe has the numbers, everyone watching knows they have the numbers, and all the editing in the world can’t make you think the voting isn’t going to go exactly how it’s supposed to. Which is why they basically crammed two episodes into one, since the decimation of the Savaii tribe is now upon us. Oh sure, next week they’ll try and get us to think the old blue tribe is thinking about voting one of their own out, but inevitably, Dawn and Whitney will be the next two to go unless one wins Immunity. What I’m interested to see is pretty much the point that Jim brought up at tribal last night. The blue tribe can pray all they want and talk about unity and togetherness, but eventually they’ll have to start voting out their own. So saying “we’re united” is only correct to a certain point. Sounds kinda dumb. Everyone knows no matter how much your tribe likes each other, there’s still a pecking order of who’s going home when it comes down to voting your own off.
I’m still scratching my head to the Cochran flip from last week. He says it’s because he waited 11 years to play Survivor and didn’t want his fate sealed by picking a rock. Fine, I understand that part. And he says he wanted to take control of his own game. Great. Get that too. Here’s the problem: He has no shot at winning. If Cochran gets to the end, how many Savaii votes do you think he’ll get? Zero. So that’s five votes from the jury he has no chance of getting. So exactly how does he expect to win? He can’t. It’s physically impossible if every Savaii member doesn’t vote for him, which I’m assuming would be the case, what was the point of flipping? At least stay with Savaii, use your intellect to convince your tribe why it would be wise to take you to the end, then once you get up there, use the “Look at me, I’m 70 lbs soaking wet, no one would ever think I’d get here and I did against the likes of Ozzy, Coach, etc.” I think he had a better chance going that route than the one he took. Jim said it best, “He’s playing the best 3rd place game in Survivor history.” Even if Coach does take him to the end, so what? He’s not winning, nor would he even get one vote. Weird decision.