Reality Steve

Dr. Reality Steve

“Reader Emails,” “Dr. Reality Steve,” and a Special Guest on the Live Blog Tonight

Is it just me, or does BP3 wildly rip-off Real World/Road Rules Challenge? RW/RR is one of the most entertaining shows around, but BP3 seems like a lousy carbon copy.

Comment: Of course it does. It’s essentially the same show, except with way worse challenges, less prizes, and less money. But the contestants all sleeping with each other – yep, that’s pretty accurate.

Do you think they’ll ever let Chris Harrison be the Bachelor?!?!

Comment: No.

Hi Steve,

First and foremost, I love your site, and your spoilers!! 🙂 🙂

I had a question about last monday’s episode of Bachelor Pad. Do you think Ed’s ridiculous drunken behavior was suggested by the producers, or do you think he acted that way on his own accord?

I would think that if he did act that way on his own, the producers would have been annoyed and just deleted those scenes right out, or told him to stop. That’s why I’m wondering if they purposely asked him to act that way to make it funny/interesting.

Can you please let me know your thoughts? Thx!

Comment: I don’t think producers had to tell Ed to drink. It’s kind of built in his DNA. They knew by casting him what he’s like, so yeah, that was a no-brainer. Ed is TV gold to them. They love what he’s doing. As I’m sure Ed is too. I doubt he’s watching the show going, “Man, I can’t believe I did that.” This is Ed’s life.


Hi, there! Long time fan, first time emailing you. I just got around to watching the season premiere of Bachelor Pad 3. After watching, I just HAD to email you about how the Bachelor/Bachelorettes from previous seasons treated the Bachelor “super fans”. These people are so delusional! It was ridiculous to see contestants like Sarah and Rachel talk about how pathetic and star struck the fans where- for them to be star struck, you would have to actually be “stars”.

I must have missed all the multiple Academy Awards and Nobel Peace Prizes they’ve won to make them so self-righteous. Don’t worry girls, I’m sure that your brief Bachelor Pad appearance will only continue to skyrocket you to a Julia Roberts level of lifelong fame and wealth.

Sorry- usually not this mean, but REALLY? Really?

Comment: That’s nothing compared to some of the things I’ve heard and seen personally. Trust me, what they said is pretty tame. There are definitely quite a few in this franchise who are much more pretentious than that.

First time I’ve ever written, but I cannot believe no blog I’ve seen has called out the fact that in ep 1 of Bachelor Pad, one of the genius twins said she felt “subhuman.” Should we applaud her for her self awareness?

Comment: Yes, we should.

Hey there.

Just a question. I was bored, and started re-watching the Bachelorette finale, and couldn’t help but wonder…

Multiple times, reference seems to be made to that Emily might not have actually wanted a proposal… do you believe this, or was it just something used to add “that much more” to the fact that she accepted one from Jef? On the AFR, she even switched the reason it took so long for her to say “Yes” from: “I wasn’t sure but in that moment, I decided” or something of that sort to “I’m all about moments”. And then…in interviews with media, she’s been saying she was surprised that he proposed because they never talked about it… “but I should have known because this is the Bachelorette and that’s what happens!”
It just seems to me that it’d almost be strange of her to do this show where, like she said, a proposal “is what happens”, yet them talk so much about how she was unsure if she wanted to be engaged at the end of this all.


Comment: It’s all for show. Of course she expected a proposal, and if she didn’t, she’s an idiot.

Hello, Steve.

New reader here, found you this season of The Bachelorette and I have a doubt, no idea if you have already answered this, if you have, feel free to disconsider and delete it, but I googled it and coudn’t find an answer. About the engagement ring, the guy proposing pays for it? If not, if it’s something the show pays, in the case of a break up, do the lady gives it back? I know, it’s stupid, but if the girl breaks up with her fiance, she usually gives the ring back, so I’m curious. If you do answer this, I won’t mind any sarcastic, acid, patronizing remarks you might make, I’m all about those. Love your writing, love your blog, love the spoilers and the way you don’t take crap from anyone. Keep up the good work, you have a faithfull new reader in me.

Comment: The guy doesn’t pay for the ring. If they break up within two years, the girl has to return it to the show.

Hey, Steve.

I don’t think I’ve ever been happier about an episode in the Bachelor/ette/Pad Franchise than I was tonight, when the psycho-twins took themselves off the show.

But this is what I don’t get: Here is a houseful of people who are willing to behave in the most outlandish ways – getting sloppily or obnoxiously drunk, hooking up with people they’re not even fond of, backstabbing their “friends” or alliance partners, etc. – and who don’t appear to be concerned about what the audience thinks of them. And in the house are the two most annoying people on earth (the twins), whose voices are hideous to the power of infinity and who are constantly whining and bickering and screaming and crying. And the rest of the players are subjected to the twins’ fighting for SEVEN hours during the night … and no one thought of telling them to either STFU or take their drama to the pool (preferably under water)?

These people say the nastiest things to each other, and not a single one of them had the cojones to confront these mental midgets?

Just wondering if you think the participants were told by The Powers That Be to keep out of it. ‘Cause I’m pretty damned sure I wouldn’t have put up with their cr*p for more than 10 minutes.


Comment: Oh I’m sure they told the twins to STFU numerous times, it just wasn’t shown. How could you not tell them to shut up? Watching at home everyone in America was telling them to shut up, so I’m guessing the people there wanted them too as well.

How do we know that the producers don’t count the votes, tear them up and announce the names of whoever they want gone? It’s not like Price Waterhouse is standing by.

Comment: Because this is considered a game show, and Standards and Practices are on set at all times. So no, the producers can’t just throw away votes and send home who they want to send home. However, can they suggest things in ITM’s to people about who to vote for, or nudge people in certain directions about voting someone off? Absolutely.

Hey RS~

Your late with your Tuesday BP blog this week!! Love your blog tho and I think it makes the Bachelor/ette/pad much more interesting to watch. Anyway, I have been following your blog since Jake and Viena’s season (insert gag!! Can’t stand those 2!). And I finally have a question for you… Last night on BP it seemed obvious that the ladies would vote fan Dave out. Then suddenly they seemed to change their mind and were deciding between Ryan and Ed. It seemed the obvious and MUCH less climactic choice would have been Dave, and I kept thinking they (producers) were somehow going to through in a twist to say the newbies were safe or something. While that didn’t specifically happen I was wondering do you think the producers tell some cast members that they need to shake things up a little and do something unexpected or do these reality show vets just decide themselves that they need to do something to shake things up and not do the obvious. Ok, that was much longer winded than I had planned, but hope you take the time to answer my fabulous question! Ha! 😉 Thanks!

Comment: Read answer above.

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  1. sclark

    August 2, 2012 at 9:35 AM

    Thank you, Steve! Looking forward very much to the upcoming columns.

  2. jessica13

    August 2, 2012 at 10:46 AM

    to the person who asked the last question to dr steve…i gotta echo was steve said…get out! that guy sounds like a condescending douche. the things he says to you are awful and so disrespectful. ”Earlier today, we were discussing his opinion that I lack common sense, and that he can’t believe the things I do/say sometimes”???? that is so mean. no guy who is worth your time will consider anything you say stupid!

  3. khaki

    August 2, 2012 at 11:10 AM

    Jessica is right. To the last Dr. Steve writer, read your question back to yourself. If you had a friend who said those things, what would you tell them? You write as somebody well educated with a good head on your shoulders. You need to step back and realize you deserve much much more in a relationship. I can understand a conversation about you being flakey if you did something really destructive like forgetting to pay all your utilities for months or locking a child in a car, but we all have our dumb blonde moments. It honestly sounds like he is grooming you to have lowered self esteem so that you bend to his every wish since he is “older and wiser.” You deserve better. You are young. You are smart. You do not have to be dependent on him. Yes you should admire qualities in your partner, but he should admire qualities in you also. If you are asking the question, you already know there is a problem. Listen to your gut. Find somebody who makes you HAPPY not MISERABLE.

  4. Dianne

    August 2, 2012 at 11:39 AM

    OMG!! That last question e-mail is a doozy! Honey, do yourself a favour, and now. Dump the guy! My gawd, I can almost hear Kalon saying things like that, and we all know what Kalon is like.

  5. elizabeth82

    August 2, 2012 at 3:51 PM

    To the person who e-mailed with suggestions for who should be on Bachelor Pad: Kacie B. a bitch? Really??!

  6. randais

    August 2, 2012 at 4:45 PM

    WOW people (other than RS) really read these emails! Who knew?

  7. jillbeau

    August 2, 2012 at 5:58 PM

    I usually skip over the Dr. Reality Steve emails, but since there a few comments about the last one, I figured I would read it. My opinion is this: your boyfriend is probably insecure. There is no reason to belittle others, especially someone you apparently care about, unless there are other issues involved. People who are insecure usually try to control whatever they can, to increase their self-esteem and sense of self worth. He is trying to keep you under his control. He wants to be in charge of the relationship. By acting as if you are having “blonde moments” or have no common sense, this causes you to question yourself which will then cause you to seek his approval. So when you mention your future together and he makes statements such as “IF we have a future”. Well look at that, he’s in control of the relationship. You’re putting all the power in his hands. When you seek his approval, he then feels better about himself. Unless you want to put up with this, I agree with the others, get out of the relationship. Otherwise, step up and stand up for yourself.

  8. jillbeau

    August 2, 2012 at 6:19 PM

    As a side note for anyone reading this, I am a social worker and I attended a seminar this past year regarding “Dealing with difficult clients”. If anyone is familiar with social work, difficult clients are a given with the occupation (although wonderful, fantastic clients are far more common). The speaker said something very intriguing during the seminar and it’s this: You are not treated the way you deserve to be treated, you are treated the way you teach others to treat you. So, in short, stand up for yourself! If you’re being disrespected, it’s because others feel as though they can get away with it. Stand up for yourself and demand respect (in a respectful way).

    *steps off soap box*

  9. Vanilla Thunder

    August 3, 2012 at 7:31 AM

    Re: the last email. I will go even further, and say that I think this dude is mentally/emotionally abusing her. It seems that he’s constantly belittling her intelligence, and though she says she’s “not that bad”, it sounds like she is at least halfway to buying into his cr@p. And going back and forth between talking about a solid future and doubting they’ll even be together in a year? That is a tactic to keep you off balance and on eggshells with him. You never know where you stand, so you do everything you can to keep him happy and not lose him. I hope the LW gets out right away, before he escalates his mental games to something worse. Find a guy who loves you the way you are, and treats you right!

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