Here’s some “Reader Emails” to close the column out. Not enough “Dr. Reality Steve” questions this week, so I’ll have those next week. Most of these are regarding the Jef and Emily breakup. At least some of these people were rational. Some.
Dear Reality Steve, Why do you personally think Emily Maynard has so many haters? I don’t believe it is jealousy as the crazed fans accuse the haters. Everywhere I go to read a blog, there is a segment of woman, who seem to have intense dis-like for her. Lot’s about all the money she gets from the Hendricks, her “fakeness”, her lack of a job, her failed relationships, her need for not marriage but more kids. Saying she does not want her kid in the public eyes yet there she is, even at the doctors office. Emily’s botoxed forrehead. Cheating. When she was said to have the heart of “mother Teresa”. What the heck do you as Reality Steve and Dr Steve think this is about? Just curious. What is the deal in your humble opinion. Mine you ask? I want to like her but I just don’t. Maybe it is those ridiculously stupid TeamJem fans that nauseate me no end. Or maybe I don’t know. Shrink my head and tell me why I just can not stand her. I do not think Im a hater but maybe I am. What defines an Emily hater.
Comment: Everyone dislikes things for all different kinds of reasons. Who knows and who cares. If they want to spend that much time hating on her, let them. I don’t hate Emily. Never have. I don’t hate anyone from this franchise. There are people I don’t care for, but hate? Really? You can actually hate someone you’ve never even met before that you saw on a TV show? Boggles my mind.
Yes, the Team Jem fans are nauseating, and yes I think they have no life and are annoying defending a couple they have no clue about, but I don’t hate them. I pity them. Plus, we apparently need to make the distinction between fans of Emily and Jef and Team Jemily fans since every time I say something about them, everyone seems to think I’m talking about EVERY person that likes them. It’s fine to like a couple from this show. But the Team Jemily fans are the ones that take it to extremes. Those people know who I’m talking about. There is a major difference. They know who they are.
Just saw your recent tweets. Whoa! Under attack! Why are the Emily and Jef fans so wildly defensive when the truth is pointed out to them? Is this unusual? Are the fans usually so wrapped up in the couple that they refuse to see the truth? Emily texted Matt Leinert – seems clear a brother wouldn’t rat out his own brother and no other family spoke out against Mike except Jef. Jef texted Kaylee about meeting at a motel. If this was false he would have sued usweekly, like you pointed out. These fans are attacking you, attacking Kaylee and seem pretty rabid. Just wanted you to know there are rational people who read your blog and appreciate your honesty. Thanks Steve!
So can you share anything else you know about Jef or Emily’s break up?
Comment: Yes, THOSE fans. The ones where you can’t say one negative word about someone they like, or they take to Twitter and scream from the rooftops you’re a hater, or they tweet @JefHolm or @EmilyMaynard, or both, and gush to them nonstop about nothing. Those are the crazies. All they want is some sort of retweet or acknowledgment by either, and I think they might pass out. It’s really bizarre. Never understood it. And that goes for any Twitter account who all they do is tweet at “celebrities” hoping for an answer. You’ve seen those people. It’s pretty disgusting because you know that’s pretty much all they have going in their life. They have 16 people following them, and every single tweet is to a celebrity in hopes for a response. Sad.
Just wanted to say that if I were you, I’d be so sick of all the idiots that obviously have nothing better to do than tweet/email/post terrible things to/about you.
I’d be so sick of it that I’d probably quit writing the column just to get rid of the drama. (Plus you never know when crazies will just pop out of the woodwork.)
However, I don’t want you to stop writing the column–so I’m glad you are chill and can just let it all roll off your back.
Anyway–I know this is random but I was just looking at Twitter and it made me shake my head…some people feel entitled to be complete jerks when they’re online.
Comment: There are people in this world that become quite brave when sitting behind a computer. My name is attached to everything I write. I’m an open book. Twitter haters are just a faceless person behind a screen name firing away at whoever just looking for attention. It’s pathetic, but there’s really nothing you can do. For what I do, I’m going to have people that don’t like me. I get it. I embrace it actually. The more people that don’t like me means I’ve obviously done my job by stirring up enough emotion in them to feel one way or another. Apathy would be the worst response I could get.
I’ve been a pretty avid reader of your site for years now… I love the laughs… They help me enjoy the show even more (Though I’ll be the first to admit the show is as cheesy as hell and very badly edited… How easily we are entertained!!).
Anyway, I was reading the following and appreciated how you chose to word it:
“I don’t think Sean will pick anyone that doesn’t have a strong sense of faith, moral values, and a relationship with God. There’s a difference between being religious and having a relationship with God. I don’t think they necessarily have to be a religious person for Sean to pick them. But he’s not going to pick someone that doesn’t believe in God.”
Specifically when you said “There’s a difference between being religious and having a relationship with God.”
THANK YOU for clarifying that to your millions of viewers.
As a 27-year-old female with tattoos, piercings, weird hair, and who’s husband has a Masters of Divinity, people are often confused when I admit I go to church every Sunday. They ask if I’m religious. I say “Dunno, but I do have a relationship with the God who created me.”
I know you probably don’t want to get into your faith details on the site… That’s fine (I’m sure you’d have some fiery comments after that!). But all I wanted to say was that I picked up on that one subtle sentence and it revealed a bit more of who you are.
As one sarcastic blogger to another… Keep it up!
Comment: Thanks. Glad you picked up on it.
Interesting that there has been so much talk about Jef and Emily and what do you know, Ben and Courtney break up! I guess it isn’t surprising. Will you give your readers additional info. on Jef and Emily? My first reaction after reading your column was that you know more than what you shared. I have tried to reason with the Jemily die-hards and they get so mad! I told them that Jef and Emily are not above anything and it is silly to think that, whether you are a fan or not. There is no point in trying to explain anything to them, they don’t get it. Do you have any idea what happened to the “troll” on twitter? I still wonder if it was Kaylee, one of her friends, or just a crazy Arie lunatic. Whoever it was, they really want to take Jef down and are very upset. The whole Jef and Emily thing has become nauseating. If you have any crumbs you want to throw, please do. That way we can get everything out there and be done with it all. I will be glad when Sean’s season airs.
Comment: You’re right. Don’t try and explain anything to them. They won’t listen because they don’t want to know the truth.
Like I said Tuesday, there’s nothing to add. They are broken up, it just happened last weekend, so any reports before that were false, and they are just figuring out how it’s going to be presented to the media. It’s been 72 hours almost since I reported that. Not ABC, neither Jef nor Emily have said a word since then. Two people that tweeted nonstop pictures and lovey dovey notes to each other have been silent for 6 days now, the longest since their relationship started. Coincidence? No, it isn’t. They broke up last weekend, and now just figuring out how they go about telling the public. There’s no reconciling going on here as far as I’ve been told. They’re done.
If you’re a couple on this show, especially a high profile one like these two, break ups don’t just happen at the snap of a finger. PR people are involved, magazines are involved, and crafting everything takes a while to get in order. With Ben and Courtney just announcing their breakup a week ago, it probably delayed Jef and Emily’s as well. Either way, I don’t know why and when it’s coming, I just know it is because they broke up last weekend. People can believe what they want and put their own spin on things. That’s on them.
Do you know what Deanna Pappas Stagliano does for a living now? Enjoy your columns very much!
Comment: No, I don’t. Why don’t you just tweet at her and ask? I’m sure she’ll update her fans on what’s going on in her life. She’s always been pretty good at that stuff.
I was thinking about this today, and it is so true for Emily and Jeff, Ben and Courtney, and pretty much everybody. The entire world is completely fake and pretty much everybody insists on sugar coating everything!!!! And I just don’t get it.
I would not think any less of these Bachelor/Bachelorette characters if they just admitted that things weren’t working out. Do they think we’re stupid? Even Erica Rose is tremendously fake with her fake hair extensions and fake nose and titties lol.
I just don’t understand why we live in a world of fakers. It’s like Pleasantville lol. WTH!? It is like we are all in one big giant bs alliance trying to win Survivor. Even in real life I cannot tell you how many people I know or have known go above and beyond to be fake and pretend that they are so great and that everything is honkey dory. Hell even Hulk Hogan faked that he was happily married to Linda and said he never cheated lol. It’s almost too bad that there aren’t more hidden cameras in the world to out these fakers. What could possibly be so embarrassing about the truth!?
I also just love it when they do release their “break-up” statements, there is always some bs about how much mutual respect they have for one another blah blah bs bs.
“While we have enjoyed seven very loving, loyal and happy years of marriage, after much soul searching we have decided to separate, we have had the deepest respect for one another throughout our relationship and continue to love each other very much, but we have grown apart.”
“I got sick of his bs volcanic temper crap and I’m banging my nanny!”
Reminds me of when people quit their jobs how they give a nice respectful 2 weeks notice instead of telling their bosses to shove it up their asses. What, do Courtney and Emily need glowing recommendations so they can have future relationships and aren’t glorified as psycho bitches?! LOL. Or maybe these break up announcements are done out of mutual respect because it’s better to say something nice. Or it’s one last dig to get some $ from the tabloids.
PS I would love to see your pics and reveal your sources but that’s cool. You absolutely don’t need to defend yourself and your reasoning because anybody should know from just looking and Emily how fake she is and we all know what a big faker Courtney is. Maybe Emily and Courtney can’t part with their diamond engagement rings lol. Even Ben faked being faithful to Courtney. I just can’t stand liars and fakers. Would the world be so awful if people told the truth!?
Comment: Man, and you thought I was cynical? How would you like to wake up every day with THAT outlook on life? Yikes. And don’t get me started on Hulk Hogan banging his best friend’s wife on camera while they were both still married. Frightening.
Calm down. It’s not that bad.
The stuff about twitter and instagram!! People believing it all is so laughable! I tell my kids that girls on these social media sites are actually “editing their lives” They only use the best pics and sometimes even photo shop them. We are all manipulated by the weird, creepy social media. I tell my kids to LIVE THEIR lives, not post them or edit them or take pics in the middle of something fun just to brag or impress. LIVE IN THE MOMENT! And above all don’t believe everything you see/read etc!
I just wanted to let you know that I was a Jef and Emily fan. Mainly because I was so hopeful for Ricki to have the experience of a loving father in her life. Anyway, I am also a very big fan of you and your website. You have always given accurate information. I know you are correct on the breakup. I am upset with these two people (Jef and Emily) for stringing fans and Ricki along. I don’t know what happened to them, but if I had to guess, I would think that Jef (whom I thought was a good guy, WRONG) caught the Hollywood bug, and realized he has crazy fan girls after him, and has decided he doesn’t want to be settled down with a wife and child. I do believe he was and still is promoting his business. I am disgusted with him now. His business should be called It’s all about JEFWATER. I do think Emily was wrong also with texting that guy (she made a huge mistake), but I do feel sorry for her because she can not seem to find her Mr. Right. I agreed with you, she should have never gone on that show again. Seems to me that the child is who will suffer from this because Jef did seem to put on a show (all the pictures of Ricki on twitter); how could a good hearted person do that to a 7 year old child, which he said in a interview is very impressionable. I say stop stringing that child along.
Now what happens to the TeamJem Project that Jef has tweeted about, where fans have donated $21,170.00 to through My Generosity Well project for wedding gift wells? Fans kept donating so I noticed they raised the original goal higher, now it is $28,000. Also, from the sell of the people water teamJef shirts they were supposed to build teamjef and Emily wells. I bet people feel scammed. No, I didn’t participate in either of these donation efforts, I would be very upset if I did. Wells are a good cause, but what are they going to do now? Call them the Ricki wells, to make up for the child that got scammed with a FAKE father figure. Thanks for listening to me vent.
Have a great day and keep up the good work
Comment: I don’t know any of the particular reasons for the break up, I just know they broke up last weekend. Sure, I’ve heard numerous stories over the last two months about things that have gone on, which all leads to the break up. But nothing is definitive and the public will never get their answers regarding that. These two will release a statement, I guarantee they don’t mud sling, they’ll spout off some niceties towards each other, and that’ll be that. The Jemily fans will still blame their breakup on the media, and people living in reality will see it was just another failed couple from this franchise that barely knew each other when they got engaged, entered the real world of dating, and things didn’t work out. Happened in 22 of the 24 seasons now. No one should be surprised.
As I read your “break-up” post from yesterday, I found myself sad that they didn’t work out. Then I drove home from work and I wanted to punch myself in the face for caring about two people whom I’ve never met, will probably never meet and don’t know a thing about and it got me contemplating the whole Jemily fascination.
I’ve been watching the Bachelor/Bachelorette since its inception and I never really felt as “close” or invested in a couple as Jef & Emily and I began to wonder why. I mean, you’ve always had the crazy fans and the ones who refuse to believe anything that you post or the tabloid reports and who are basically living under a rock. As a fan, it IS nice to see when couples work out, even though it is few and far between. However, I really think the fascination is just in Emily herself. When she was shown to America during Brad’s season and her story came out, it was a story that made all of America feel for. Young love, tragedy, a child who would never know her father…in fact, I’m shocked Lifetime hasn’t made a movie yet. But at the end of the day, this story made Emily America’s “Rudy”. Everyone was rooting for her. Frankly, I don’t think it mattered if it was Brad or any other random guy. We all just wanted Emily to come out on top and have this fairy-tale story of love and triumph from tragedy.
When it didn’t work out with Brad, everyone was quick to blame him and his temper and once again, see Emily as the victim. Now, I’m not saying I don’t think Brad was at fault. I’m sure he was. He seems like he has a good temper on him and definitely went a little overboard during his season when he claimed to have known it was Emily from an early stage. But the fact of the matter is that Emily could do no wrong. When she was given a second chance at love, America cheered. Nobody seemed to care that it was a little bit boring of a season, no over-night dates, nothing really PG-13 aside from some Arie kisses. Everyone just wanted her to finally get her happy ending. I happen to be a Jef fan since early on b/c he brought a uniqueness to the show that we haven’t really seen before. He wasn’t your cookie-cutter, J. Crew model-esque character. He was just him. A kid from Utah that had a good business plan that he turned into a successful business. Regardless if you were Team Arie, Sean or Jef, you were Team Emily. No one ever forgot about the shy girl who lost her fiance before finding out she was pregnant. Anything that was ever said about her that was negative was rubbish. America just wanted her and Ricki to have it all.
When you broke the news of her sexting incident and that it was Matt Leinart, people were so quick to judge you and refuse to accept that it could be true. What Emily & Jef were tweeting and facebooking HAD to be the truth. These tabloids and their family and exes were just lying and trying to get their 15 minutes. Emily could once again do no wrong. I’m now just sitting back and waiting to read how they play off their official announcement and what they say is to blame. And i can’t wait for the Jemily’s to start trashing Jef. At the end of the day, the Bachelor Franchise did what they do best. They got a character in Emily to portray a tragic heroine. They made America fall in love with the edited perception of her, as they will continue to do. I wouldn’t be surprised if I see a one-hour ABC special sitting down with the two of them in a “What Went Wrong” special. The crazy fans will continue to sing her praises until they are blue in the face. I think more people need to take a step back and truly understand that this is a reality show. You are putting random, good-looking strangers in a mansion, flying them around the country with the premise to fall in love. After 8 weeks, anyone would fall for someone. It’s human nature. Take all of that away and you are still left with two strangers, who can no longer be whisked away on a private jet across the world every week. You have real-life. Family, friends, bills and the media digging into your past and your every waking move. It’s hard for even non-reality couples to survive everyday life. Add the media to that and you have a recipe for failure. It’s just not reality.
I’m going to stop my rant. Really not sure why I’m e-mailing this to you, but reading some of the comments that you get make me shake my head at the people in this country that we live in. I’m glad I snapped myself out of my Jemily fascination. Hope more people can do the same. Keep doing your thing
Comment: Must’ve been a long car ride home. I think some of the stuff you say could be true, but you might’ve overanalyzed the situation a bit. I think Jillian’s response in the interview I linked to earlier accurately portrays what a mind f**k someone goes through when on this show. Give it a listen.
When Jef and Emily’s public statement is released, will you share the evidence/intel you’ve had all along? I’m sure their statement will be generic and broad, but many people are SO curious about which rumors are true and which aren’t.
Most of all, congrats on scooping the tabs and Kaboom-ing Fleiss in a week he has already taken a huge credibility hit (Ben and Courtney’s breakup). And your post this week was terrifically written, as well. I love it when you are so certain!
I bet the Arie loonies are peeing themselves with glee right now….
Comment: No. There’s no need to share anything else. As I said Tuesday, I can’t prove any of it, which is why I just stated, “Look, they’re broken up. Just wanted you to know.” Just like I couldn’t prove the Jason/Molly/Melissa ending, or that Jake picked Vienna, or that Ashley picked JP, or that Ben picked Courtney. Most of my spoilers I’ve given weeks ahead of time I can’t prove. I just know they happened. But because of the credibility I’ve built up and the track record I have, people believe me. This will prove to be no different.
Any chance you could transcribe all the emails and tweets you’ve gotten from the Jemily fanatics and the Arie lunatics into one special email column? there’s got to be some good ones you haven’t shown us yet, especially the tweets (which as someone who doesn’t regularly go there, I’ve probably missed out on.)
Plus, I can only imagine you’ve gotten some hilarious ones with your most recent column.
Comment: I wish I would’ve saved a lot of them. The only thing I could do now would be the tweets. Maybe I will at some point when this is all over. You’d get a good laugh out of it.
You’ve commented a few times that you might get around to doing a Reality Roundup post at your site, so I wanted to email and ask you about the VFTW website.
They’re claiming victory for knocking out Drew Lachey and Helio Castronves last night because they’re promoting voting for the worst dancer, which is obviously Bristol Palin. I was really shocked and outraged that Bristol Palin was safe.
How can VFTW get away with doing something like this and why don’t the TPTB with DWTS do something about VFTW??
Comment: I promise that Reality Roundup is coming back next week. I definitely have some opinions on DWTS, The Voice, X Factor, and the new Idol judges that I need to get to. Promise it’s coming next week.
Bristol Palin wasn’t one of the 6 best dancers in her first season and she made the top 3. This show is a popularity contest and nothing else. Vote for the Worst is a site that claims every season they’re the reason why bad dancers last. There’s no way to prove that’s the case, so, it’s a moot point. As we saw the first time around, Bristol has a huge fan base that keeps voting for her and I expect much of the same this season.
Recently Fleiss tweeted that something happened that hasn’t happened since season 1. Do you know what he’s talking about?
Also, doesn’t it seem like they are giving the WHOLE season away by releasing pictures and names of people and then allowing them to tweet as soon as they get back?! I don’t get it! Do you think they will keep all 3 of the final 3 at the final destination like they did with Emily’s season?
Comment: I will know soon enough.
Not everyone that’s back is tweeting and back on FB. They do their best to police that, but honestly, I don’t think they care. If you lasted two episodes, they don’t care about you and what you do after the show.
You also got to remember, that 95% of this show’s audience does not stalk these girls on Twitter and Facebook and dig in to do research on their whereabouts. So to those people, they are clueless to what’s going on right now. They tune out the second the “After the Final Rose” show airs, and they tune back in the second the next season starts. I think because you’re fans of this site and you follow more closely than others, you get lost in realizing that the people who are following this show every day of filming are such a tiny % of their real audience.
Hey Steve, so I’ve emailed a couple times but have never gotten a response :((I understand that your busy tho so its ok. Do you only answer on your page, or do you answer questions privately too??? So I just read your post about the emails between you and Kaylee. I am one of those Jemily fans you make fun of. My mind is blown!!!!!!!!! It’s unfortunate that, that all happened. I feel really bad for Kaylee. She seems like a sweet girl. You said on the post that there is more stuff besides what is out in the media, and thats why you knew they wouldn’t last. Could you PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!! share it. I know you don’t owe us anything and that you don’t have to, but at this point I really want to know! I know I sound really dumb right now, and that your thinking that I really need to get life. I honestly couldn’t tell you why I care so much. We watch these couples fall in love on national tv (even if its fake) in exotic places. We like to believe that fairytales do exist. We get invested in these couple and want to know what really happened ya know. We’re aren’t entitled to know or anything but idk I just care and would like to know. Hope that makes sense Steve. Thank you so much for your time Steve :))))) Have a great day
Comment: Glad I could convert at least one Jemily fan from fantasy land back into the real world. If only I had that magical power for all the others, the world would be a better place.
Just know they are broken up. Nothing I say will make you feel any better. Probably make you feel worse if anything. So just leave it at, they’re broken up, move on with your life, and don’t spend five more seconds worrying about them.
I’ve always been a big fan of Ashley’s. She got so much criticism during her bachelorette season, but she’s the one getting a husband out of the franchise! I’m curious to know if you’ve heard any more details about their televised wedding…On another note, what are your thoughts on Emily doing a sit-down interview with Chris when her breakup becomes public?
Comment: No. No details, but I’m sure they’ll be coming out soon.
Emily won’t be doing a sit down because Sean’s season doesn’t start until January. Jef and Emily will be done waaaaaay before that for anyone to still care come January. Plus, for her sake, she doesn’t need to do that a second time.
Hearing about their break up makes me not want to watch anymore! No one lasts!! Do you know how they will announce the break up/when?
1) There is a rumor floating around that Emily did not pick Jef, that it was all faked, and their entire relationship from the start was fake. Also, something else going around is that Arie walked out on Emily, although the editing made it look like she dumped him for Jef ? Any truth to all that ?
2) What is your opinion on Brad Womack ? Do you know him personally ? He looks like a great guy overall.
3) How do you make a living from your blog ? The ads on your site definitely is not enough to keep you going. Just curious.
Comment: 1. That’s a stupid rumor.
2. No, I don’t know Brad.
3. They’re not? Aaaaaaaaannd you know this how…?
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