It’s back! Had to be at least a year since I’ve done this. Gonna give my quick views on all the shows I’m watching right now. A lot of good ones, some crappy ones, and a few new fall shows that just started up. Lets do this..
Dancing with the Stars
-Val and Kelly are totally doing it. A lot. I don’t care what statement her rep gives on her behalf, I don’t buy it. These two are walking sex objects, and hearing how many hookups have gone on behind-the-scenes of this show over the years, I’m not an idiot to think these two aren’t. And oh yeah, Kelly Monaco is the hottest thing they’ve had on this show maybe ever. Yowza.
-I’m done with Kirstie Alley. Ok, I get it. You appeal to the older housewife who isn’t in the greatest shape in the world. That was so two seasons ago when you were on. Up against everyone else in this competition, she’s obviously the worst dancer there. It’s time to put her out of her misery. It’s old, it’s tired, and it’s not funny anymore. Good riddance.
-I think Shawn Johnson or Gilles Marini are winning this season. I just don’t see it with Melissa, Apolo, Emmitt, Sabrina, or Kelly having enough to outdo them. Then again, as Kelly said a few weeks ago, this show has nothing to do with dancing. They’re all good at this point (well, except for Kirstie) and all have fanbases. If you’re asking me who are the two best technical dancers and who’ve put on the best performances week in and week out? That’s Shawn and Gilles. All the others have done well in certain dances, but nothing to make you think they’re the best dancers. So we’ll see. Just as long as Kelly Monaco stays on my TV for as long as possible and continues to wear mean’s shirts, a bra, and boy shorts with nothing else, she should never get voted off. Ever. Ever. Ever.
-The only one I can see maybe challenging Shawn and Gilles is Sabrina. However, she’s already been in the final two, and she was like 6th on her season, when she was clearly better than most of the dancers there. So her fanbase isn’t big enough to compete. But her dance skills are just as good, if not better, than everyone there. She just isn’t “known” enough to take home the trophy.
-I don’t know what happened to Emmitt this season, but he’s acting much too cocky. I’m not nearly as entertained by him as I was back when he was first on. I think because he won, he thinks he’s better than he actually is. I get a very oft-putting vibe from him this season.
-Melissa? Sorry about your neck. Moving on.
-What was the point of bringing Paula Abdul there for one episode to judge? Yes, I know she has a dance/choreography background, but it seemed so forced and unnecessary. Does Paula have some lifetime contract somewhere that says she gets to show up on some reality show once a year just to keep her name out there? She is so yesterday’s news, it’s sickening. She’s been a horrible judge at everything she’s done, she’s not relevant anymore, and I’m hearing a big rumor that MC Skat Kat isn’t even returning her calls. I’m sorry, but if you’ve ever made a video dancing with a cartoon, you can be forever ridiculed for that. This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen. Take it away…
-Even though we have our very own Scott Ottersen covers this show for the site, I’ve said many times that “Survivor” will always be my all-time favorite reality show, so I obviously have some thoughts on it. I think probably because it’s been around the longest and essentially every single reality show out there that has some sort of elimination format where people are getting voted or kicked off are all because the concept originated from “Survivor.” Remember back when this show first started was during the advent of reality TV competition shows. They set the mold for all these knockoff shows after them, and for that, I give them credit that they’re not in their 25th season. It’s pretty amazing when you think about it. Also don’t forget that Survivor’s first season finale was watched by 51 million people, which is a ridiculous number that no reality show has ever come close to since, and never will. To be exact, the finale of “Survivor” was watched by 51.7 million viewers, the second-highest viewership of any American television episode during the first decade of the 21st century, exceeded only by the finale of “Friends.” 51 million people watching a reality show finale? That is absurd.
-So yeah, they are the gold standard set for reality TV and will never be topped. Obviously nothing is as fresh 25 seasons in, and a lot of challenges are hybrids of ones we’ve seen before, but the concept of the show remains the same and is why it’s so intriguing. You know the worst response I get from people who say they don’t watch “Survivor?” “Ugh, how stupid. I don’t want to see a show with them eating bugs.” Really? Well, if you bothered to ever watch the show you’d realize that the days of them eating bugs and what not ended, oh I don’t know, about 5 years and 10 seasons ago. Maybe longer. I can’t remember the last time they had a challenge where they had to eat pig guts or goat testicles. Doesn’t happen anymore and I don’t expect it to again either. For whatever reason they did away with it, which is probably a good thing.
-And now that they’re 25 seasons in, basically every season is bringing back some returning contestants. I thought this season was a good idea, but were there really people out there clamoring to see Mike Skupin, Russell Swan, and Jonathon Penner come back and compete? Probably not, but it’s still always interesting to bring back a veteran to mix them with people who haven’t played. You’d all think, well, there’s no way a returning player would ever win because of “X, Y, Z” reasons, yet, we saw Boston Rob win on his 3rd time playing. Or was it his 4th? Can’t remember. Nevertheless, that shot down that theory. Do I think either Penner or Skupin will win this season? No. And I haven’t read any spoilers either, nor do I want to. I can just tell they aren’t going to. I think the strategy should be to keep them around for intelligence and guidance for as long as you can, then cut them loose.
-Next season airing in February is another “Fans vs Favorites” (already filmed back in the summer), but I gotta say, wasn’t too impressed with the cast list. Off the top of my head, I only remember a few that were told to me, but I think people may be a tad disappointed when they see the returning 10 players. A couple good ones, but no one really earth shattering. Hell, when I originally saw the list of names, there were 3 or 4 I completely didn’t recognize, and I’ve watched every episode of every season. So that shows how little of impact they made. I can tell you this: Someone from this season is on next season of Fans vs Favorites, which is in and of itself probably an advantage to them, just like casting Russell on back-to-back seasons was. Remember, when they went to film his Heroes vs Villains season right after he’d just completed Samoa, none of the cast members had seen any episodes he’d been in, so they had no idea about his game play and had no idea who he was, hence the reason he made the finals in back-to-back seasons. I’m curious to see how this season’s returning player fares next season. Then again, I don’t even know how far they last this season anyway, but I’m curious to know which season they go farther in.
Sorry, but I gave up on this show after the blind auditions. I just can’t take it. Every judge has a hard time giving everyone criticism, there’s too many contestants that make it to the live shows, there aren’t enough background stories to where you can get invested in the singers, and I’m kinda just over the whole spinning chair thing. Not to mention, can anyone that’s not a die hard of this show give you the names of the seasons 1 and 2 winners? Wasn’t it like the same exact type of performer? Also, the fact that they decided to come back with a fall season right after their spring season ended was kind of a joke. Overkill. Idol does it right with one season per calendar year. Same with “X Factor” which has MUCH better singers, I think. I don’t think Usher and Shakira replacing Cee Lo and Christina will do all that much for the show. It does well in the ratings for them, but in terms of where it stands in the singing competition market, I’ll take Idol and X Factor over it every day of the week and twice on Sundays.
-Now, we’re talking. Here’s a show I’m legitimately excited about it’s live shows starting next Thursday night. I thought the audition episodes of this season, with no hosts, was the best audition episodes we’ve ever seen on any singing show. The “Hills”-type format they used in showing the auditions and back stories was something we’d never seen before and I loved it. I don’t need narration for that. I don’t need Seacrest talking to the families outside the audition room door, etc. I thought the way X Factor played it this season was excellent. They told some really good stories just by shooting video and running ITM’s. Good stuff.
-With that said, the hiring of Mario Lopez and Khloe Kardashian makes me want to vomit up my lunch. Ugh. I’m telling you right now, although they will be such a little part of the show, they will suck. Badly. I’m gonna try not to focus on their suckitude, but it’s gonna be hard not to. Name me one thing Khloe has ever done live in her life that didn’t come off as her sounded like a complete idiot. She could bench press Mario, she has a horrible, whiny voice, and she’s never hosted anything in her life. Other than that, great hire X Factor! I am so not looking forward to them hosting the show in case you couldn’t tell.
-The firing of Paula and Nicole and bringing in Britney and Demi makes all the sense in the world from a pop culture standpoint, but time will still tell how good of mentors and judges they will be. I think Demi will be fine, since she’s actually shown us some decent dialogue and criticism during the audition rounds. But lets be honest, I’m worried for Britney. With the trial happening right now with her former manager looking for some money and all this stuff leaking about her back in those days, I can’t imagine she’s in a great frame of mind with live shows starting next week. This could be quite the sh** show to watch. And really, has she given us anything in her judging or critiquing to make us think she’s any good? She’s got the biggest bullseye on her back regarding this season, that’s for sure.
-Can’t say I disagree with many, if any, of the Final 16 contestants. Oh yeah, X Factor heads to live shows with 16 contestants. I just read this morning “The Voice” has 40 when their live shows start? Sorry, but that’s waaaaaay too many. Audience can’t get invested when there’s that many because you forget who’s who and who has what back story. Idol does it perfect with their final 12. Not too few, not too much. 40 is way too many. But as for the teams this season, I’m actually shocked Simon got the groups because, although there are some good groups (Emblem3 will be making an album whether they win or not), I just don’t see a group winning or even getting to final 2.
-I think the reason they gave Britney the teens is because they know that’s where the strongest singers are this season and she’ll probably have the winner in her group, making her happy. I’m calling it right now. Carly Rose is gonna win this thing. A lot of good singers this season in every category, but I think that little fireball is winning it. Holy crap the pipes on her. And if not her, maybe even Diamond White. Although I think Carly has the slight edge on her in the vocals department. Hell, she even has a perfect stage name to get started – Carly Rose. She’ll definitely just cut her last name out of it since Carly Rose is much more catchy. But I like both her and Diamond for Britney’s group.
-For Demi, the only one I was actually surprised that didn’t make the finals was Jillian Jensen. Not necessarily the best voice, and not sure if she could’ve emotionally handled the show, but I thought she’d get cast just for her story. I think Paige will resonate with viewers, but I’m not so sure about Willie. He’s straight out of the 1980’s with his get up, and I think he’s a one trick pony. Then again, so was Scotty McCreary and he won Idol, so I guess anything is possible. Janelle Garcia won’t last, and lets face it, Cece will be must see TV. Especially if she keeps painting her face like a leopard. The most unlikable of the 24 performing, so lets see how long the audience can put up with her. Funny thing is, I think she outsang Paige during the auditions in Miami, but got such a diva edit, I think it’ll be next to impossible for her to overcome it.
-Why should I care about L.A. Reid’s team when he doesn’t? The only guy worth caring about is David Corry just because of the back story he has with apparently they found his birth mother down in Brazil. That’ll be worth at least 6 or 7 episodes of him staying. No doubt they will play that up. Other than that, I don’t think many of his singers will last long. But as long as we get to see L.A. dance in his chair all season with his eyes closed, I’m good.
-Simon actually has three really good groups. Two of which were created by the show. Layla’s and whatever else that one group is called. But Emblem3 is still Simon’s best shot of winning for the 2nd year in a row. They are exactly what the demographic is for the voters on this show, and as I said, even if they don’t win they’ll get a record deal hands down. Bring on the live shows!
Final Thoughts on Some Scripted Shows…
-“Nashville” is the best new show on TV. Then again, I think it’s the only new show that debuted that I’m watching, so, I guess I don’t have much to compare it to. And yes, I’m absolutely biased because I’m a Connie Britton apologist and will like basically anything she’s in. I was just shocked to see that both her and Hayden Panettiere actually could sing. I just figured someone else would lay down the tracks and they’d lip sync over them. Quite impressive. Even more impressive? That Hayden seems to enjoy getting naked every episode.
-Can I tell you who’s been the most overrated character on TV for the last 4 or 5 seasons or so? I thought initially everyone loved him, then it kinda waned as the show went on, but now, I don’t find him funny in the least bit. And to hear he’s getting his own spin-off next season is mind boggling. Prediction: It will get cancelled before the first season is over. I’m sorry, but Dwight Schrute isn’t the least bit funny anymore and hasn’t been for a while. Andy and Jim are the funniest characters on that show, and even that’s starting to stretch it thin. “The Office” had a good run, but I think it might’ve went two seasons too long. A couple classic episodes here and there, but not nearly as consistently funny as it used to be.
-Saw the premiere of “American Horror Story,” still haven’t watched last nights, but it I liked it. Not as much as season 1, and knowing the way Ryan Murphy likes to completely go for the more crazy and bizarre with his stories, this show is in danger of jumping the shark. Obviously I gotta see more episodes before I make that determination, but I just wish they would’ve had some continuation with the first season. Or even a prequel. I was well aware that season 2 was gonna be a reboot of the franchise going in, but that doesn’t mean I think it was a good idea. We’ll see. Ryan Murphy is obsessed with gratuitous male ass shots in his FX shows. Is Adam Levine still gonna be able to bang his chick with one arm now? This is stuff I have to know.
-“Modern Family” still remains the funniest show on television, and has a pretty wide lead on the rest of the pack. However, if you haven’t seen “Parks and Recreation” you’re missing out. Brilliant ensemble casting and every single one of their characters is likable. Rob Lowe’s can be a bit much at times, and I get that’s the point of his character, but sometimes it’s just not funny.
-I think some of you may know my obsession with the “Smallville” franchise, so when I saw they were doing a series based of the Green Arrow character, you knew I was in. Unfortunately, I’ve yet to watch either of the first two episodes. But hey, I heard they were good. Just disappointed they didn’t use the same guy they used in the “Smallville” franchise to play him. Very much reminded me of Kasey Kahl. Would’ve been interesting to see Kasey fighting crime with an arrow all while Vienna was blowing up his phone and nagging him on the other end. I know they’re not together. I’m just talking for storylines people. Work with me here.
-90210 summary: Max and Naomi will never last, Annie hasn’t had a good storyline in at least 2 seasons, Adriana will totally dump Dixon and get with the hot promoter guy she slept with in Vegas, and Silver and Teddy having a baby is just weird. The end.