Reality Steve

Dr. Reality Steve

“Reader Emails,” “Dr. Reality Steve,” & Which Former “Bachelor” Lead is Now Trolling Tinder?


In your tweet regarding Des being on Jimmy Kimmel when he “predicts” who her final four are and who her final choice is and how he’s “predicted” the last several season choices…’s obvious he reads the spoilers, but have you thought about waiting to releasing the final spoilers until after the lead appears on Jimmy Kimmel where he makes his “prediction” to see what he would come up with? I bet he gets ’em wrong! 🙂

Thanks for your time!

Comment: No. It doesn’t bother me what Jimmy does, and I’m not gonna cater my column to appease him. I post stuff when I get it confirmed by my sources. I’m fine with it, because it’s become so blatant now that he’s done it 3 years in a row. I think it’s funny.

Hi Steve,

I just finished reading your reader emails and I was surprised someone didn’t mention or notice something I saw. During the show they put tweets flashed at the bottom of the screen that have been sent in by viewers. Sometime during the limo exits or the cocktail party someone tweeted an almost exact quote from your spoiler column comparing Drew as a look alike to Jake Pavelka. I had your column up in front of me and it was pretty much word for word. It surprised me because I figured the show producers would read your blog and not post anything that even hinted that it might come from you. Did you see that tweet? Thanks for your blog! I love it!

Comment: I didn’t see that tweet in particular, no. I don’t read many of them. I’m too busy writing while the show is on. Not to mention the last 2 weeks I’ve live tweeted. I’ve found I’m spending more time looking down at my note pad or my phone, than actually looking at the screen. I might need to stop live tweeting because I know I’m missing some stuff.

Hey Steve – I saw on E! news last night that Ali Fedotowsky is predicting Brooks as the guy Des chooses. How very wise and perceptive she is to come up with this all on her own without any help from your spoilers.

Comment: Same feelings about Ali as I do about Jimmy – I’m fine with it. I know where people are coming to get their spoilers and my numbers aren’t suffering, so let anyone else do what they want to do. It makes no difference to me. Ali could’ve went on E! and said she KNOWS Brooks wins and not credit me, and I wouldn’t care. I only worry about myself and my site, and let others talk about me and what I say. It’s the way it’s always been since I started spoiling.

Just wanted to point out that all of Desiree’s fairytale references are blaringly reminiscent of Julie’s quest for a “fanty-tale” in “Burning Love.” They called it before it even happened. That is how cliché this show has become.

Carry on.

Comment: Yes they are. Maybe Des was a huge fan of Julie’s season. She sure has some guys that are similar to Julie’s.

Dont you think Jonathan could have just been a set up situation? I
think he was because they really over played the fact that shes
there for the right reasons and that they need to treat her right
or “see what happens if you dont”. She said it… Chris said it.. a
couple times before the end of the show…

I dont know if she wanted him there to prove that point and make
the men aware she wasnt messing around or if the show came up with
it.. but it was stupid. I cant believe that any guy in his right
mind would say it.. and keep coming back with that after it was
obvious it annoyed her the first time.

Comment: I think it was a combination of alcohol and producer manipulation. Nothing more, nothing less.

Robert totally looks like a young Rob Lowe.

Do you see the resemblance?


Comment: Yes. Yes I do. I think the best part about the Rob Lowe picture is that this person actually sent me in a signed copy of Rob back when he was boozin’ and whorin’ it up back in the day. Take that to a collectible show and sell it. Could be worth something.


Not sure if you noticed the tweets during the show… if you did and already spoke about it, apologies. But I found it funny that so many of the “BachelorNation” speaks out were people who work on or are connected to the show. And then there’s the tweet from @TheFinalRose (who seems connected with all the Bachelor people) that is EXACTLY what you wrote in your play-by-play of Des’ guys!

“Drew totally has a slight Jake Pavelka vibe about him.” Just further proof of how much they pay attention to you.

Keep up the good work. You make watching so much more fun!

Comment: Based on what executive producer Robert Mills and Chris Harrison tweeted out this week, looks like the live tweeting on screen will be scaled back a bit because, well, people think it sucks. Which it does. It offers no added insight to the show whatsoever. It’s pointless.

love your blog!

totally random but just a funny heads up. so i flipping through the channels and turned on the premiere episode of bachelorette last night (rerun on abc…blow out kings game and nothing else on tv…i was that desperate) and verizon fios is my provider. I was laughing when i clicked on the info for the episode and the “cast” was as followed in this exact order: chris harrison, brooks forrester, drew kenney, chris siegfried, zak waddell, and kasey stewart. those were the only names shown if you clicked on the info of the episode and considering brooks and chris were barely shown i found it pretty funny that the “cast” included des’s top 4 guys. not sure who is responsible for the info of the program but it’s not like verizon or abc can claim it was alphabetical or something. if there was any doubt you were wrong (which you aren’t), can’t image there is now.

i wouldn’t watch the show without your blog!!


Comment: Pretty random. Although out of order, that is pretty funny. That’s about as coincidental as you can get.

Looks like Team Bachelor hit the motherload on tales of sorrow. You’re too young to remember a daytime TV show from the 1950’s, “Queen for a Day.” It was absolutely sick. Three women would get up and tell their sob stories to a live audience which would then vote whose sob story was the worst. They used an applause meter to count the vote. I have no idea how that worked, but there was a little semi circle on the stage with an arrow apparently driven by the intensity of the applause.

The lady whose sob story beat the others would walk away with all kinds of “fabulous” prizes (usually involving a Maytag, a houseful of linoleum flooring – really helpful to people who usually had no houses – and a $50 gift certificate for the Spiegel catalog). The losers got nothing.

So we’ve gone from prior seasons of “I wish so and so would be more open” to “too much information.”

Why do I watch this?


Comment: That was a game show in the 50’s? How boring. Would they do background checks for the legitimacy of these people’s stories, or could they just make anything up for the dope ass new linoleum flooring? I swear I could be a TV executive.

I’ve become weirdly obsessed with your reader emails section – it’s kind of fascinating and hard to stop reading despite being really awful. I’m legitimately curious though – how many of these emails do you get seeking dating and relationship advice? No offense to you but it’s really sad and kind of pathetic that these people have no one to go to with their strange relationship issues other than the guy who spoils ‘The Bachelor/ette.’ I’ve always enjoyed your spoilers, they satisfy my curiosity and usually help me decide which episodes I want to bother watching. But I’m just wondering why on earth you indulge all these people seeking advice? Seems most of them should be referred to a therapist…

Good luck recapping this season – sounds like the cheesiest and most boring one ever, which is saying something. Think I’ll sit this one out.

Comment: How many of these emails do I get? All the ones that you see every Thursday. Once in a blue moon someone will email “Dr. Reality Steve,” and ask for my advice but don’t want it posted. Very rarely though. Some weeks I have more than others. Like this week’s is rather small. Only three of them.

I don’t mind doing it. It’s rather fun. And makes me realize that I don’t have it half as bad as some of these people. I’m definitely surprised by some of the things people confide in me, but it’s all done anonymously, so maybe I’m not. I guarantee if I posted these people’s email addresses/names, there wouldn’t be a column anymore because no one would send anything in for fear of being embarrassed or emailed by a bunch of strangers. That’s why I don’t do it.

Am I a trained professional? No. Do I have a background in psychology? Nope. But I’m honest. And I’m a third party. And sometimes people need that so I guess that’s why they ask. Is every bit of advice I give brilliant? No. I just try and take a realistic approach to things. Most of the emails it seems like people over analyze or complicate matters more than they should, when usually the answer is pretty clear, and I just try to be that person to open their eyes to it.

Hey Steve!

I was wondering if you know of anyone else from the bachelor franchise besides Ali who is blogging about Des’ season? For Sean’s season many were like Courtney, Michael stag, arie, etc. Thanks for your time!

Comment: Sarah Herron from Sean’s season is. I linked to her blog in Tuesday’s column. That website discontinued the blogs from former contestants this season. So outside of Ali and Sarah, I don’t know of any others who have one. But a lot are live tweeting the show, so you can go that route.

Hi Steve! Hope you are enjoying your summer!

Here is what I don’t get….if a guy is in the middle of telling Des his “sob story” or whatever and someone else comes in and interrupts him 30 seconds into his story, why doesn’t he just say, “Hey bro, I am right in the middle of telling her something important can I have just like 3 more minutes of her time and then I will come get you?”

I just don’t see what the harm is in saying something like that. If someone said that to me I would probably be like, “Ok sure! No problem.”

Have you ever wondered that? Yeah I know….then they would have no drama, right?

Comment: You answered your own question.


Something has been bothering me since the first night about Chris on the Bachelorette. He stole his entrance from The Office! Jim does the “Do you mind if I tie my shoe thing” Here is the link to the clip:

I’m just saying, if I were Des and someone stole a line from The Office and claimed it was theirs, they would be gone! That’s just because I love The Office so much 🙂

Also, if someone said “for the right reasons” one more time last night, I was going to throw my TV out the window.

Keep up the good work!

Comment: I guess Chris is now competing with Jef Holm for biggest rip offs since all of Jef’s lines to Emily were stolen from E-cards.

Hi Steve,

I’ve been following your posts for years now. I’ve actually watched the Bachelor & Bachelorette since the beginning although I took a few seasons off as I couldn’t stand the leads. My neighbor and I would meet at the bus stop on Tuesday morning and while we waited for the kids to get on the bus we would predict what would happen. She was always right because of your site so once she told me I’ve been following ever since. Now it’s more like background noise while I’m working.

Which brings us to why I’m finally writing to you.

I’m a travel agent and just received the following email from Elite Island Resorts. Just in case you needed any additional confirmation about Antigua. This is the first time I’ve gotten email from a resort before the show airs. I’ve gotten “As Seen on….” emails from resorts after the season ended. I was a little surprised that the resorts would be allowed to send out this type of information so early.

Anyhow, just thought I would share.


Comment: Yeah, that is pretty bizarre that Elite Island Resorts is giving away all three locations that they film the overnight dates at almost 2 months before it airs. Could be it was mistakenly emailed out, or not. I don’t remember this happening before but I could be wrong.

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  1. bigfatwoman

    June 6, 2013 at 7:57 AM


    Sorry to hear your dream girl is off the market (for now). I hope you find the strength and resolve to find something to live for.


  2. randais

    June 6, 2013 at 10:23 AM

    Hahahahhahhaaahahhaa…good one BFW

  3. bzliteyear

    June 6, 2013 at 11:01 AM

    dude, JLH may have pretty face/upper body, but her lower body (esp legs/ankles) matches that of a 200 lb women(not being mean, but it’s accurate). importantly, as you highlighted, this woman’s known to be a head case w/ lots of baggage…good luck to her, but glad you’re better off for holding out 🙂

  4. JovisMom

    June 6, 2013 at 11:11 AM

    @ The last Dr Steve emailer – I am your boat exactly! My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 yrs, are talking marriage, and have never had a fight and when we do disagree it’s about silly things and doesn’t effect anything. I had the same reservations as you before but now I’m over it. Exactly what Steve said is the advise I gave myself. I had a past relationship where we fought like cats and dogs and that was no fun. This relationship is perfect! 🙂 Be greatful you have such a wonderful man. You have been through some trying times with him as well, if that didn’t start a fight then I think you are good. Good luck to you!

  5. lexie

    June 6, 2013 at 11:32 AM

    OMFG… that letter from the girl about the boyfriend in Reno had me tears from laughing so hard.

  6. mcchic

    June 6, 2013 at 1:41 PM

    Loooong (like years!) time lurker – first time commenter. To the person who sent the last Dr Steve email- I was in the exact same situation and we sound like we’re around the same age. I met my (now) husband and we dated very very seriously for a year before we got engaged. 8 months in he had already bought the ring (I had no idea) and he surprised me by proposing on our 1 year anniversary – married a year and a half later. I grew up with a very strict volatile father and my parents fought constantly and still do to this day. H and I.. never. We disagree on stuff – we’re not push overs. We get frustrated sometimes about minor things.. always seems to happen in a parking lot when we can’t find parking (he has the worst sense of direction) or deciding on what to make for dinner (he basically can only cook hot dogs lol). But a big blow out fight or even just yelling at each other? Nope. Not even during the stressful wedding planning days. We’re just very compatible. Also my H is extremely easy going, calm and non-confrontational. He was in 2+ year relationship before we got together and one of his ex’s issues was that he wouldn’t get mad at her!

    If your BF is the same – you should count your lucky stars that he is as I’ve seen both sides of the coin. I’d pick no fighting any day. Fighting does not = passion or normalcy. I think so often our in society we think if we’re not fighting the world is ending or the passion is gone! Quite the opposite! I KNEW from when I first met him that he was my lobster so maybe your worries about the lack of fighting stem from something deeper. If you have been living together and It. Is. Bliss. as you stated and you’re STILL on the fence? Maybe he is not “the one” and you’re too afraid to admit it! Good luck

  7. goose

    June 6, 2013 at 2:47 PM

    Again, to the person who sent the last Dr. Steve email – don’t worry about it!! I would have to say my situation is identical to @mcchic’s. My fiancé and I have been dating for three years and got engaged this past March. We have never had a fight. We are incredibly similar (our ‘myers-briggs’ personality types are identical, let alone they’re the most uncommon type) and I truly believe I would never find ANYONE that ‘gets’ me as much as he does, and vise versa. There are small things we disagree about – ie: which way the toilet paper roll goes on the holder and how many times a day the dishes need to be done – but we have never had a ‘fight’ and I really don’t believe we ever will. Sure we both get angry sometimes but it’s usually just a small issue and we never take it out on each other. I have dated guys in the past who will push my buttons or I’ll push theirs, and we just don’t do that! We know when to say something and when to back off, and we are happy as could be! Maybe there are other reasons why you’re having reservations, but if the lack of fighting is the only thing holding you back.. you should be grateful that ‘not fighting’ is your only ‘issue’ – embrace it (and him)!!!!!!!!! 🙂

  8. karynr

    June 6, 2013 at 3:05 PM

    goose……the toilet paper goes under not over.

    Turbulent relationships are not healthy. Been there, done that and never again!

  9. goose

    June 7, 2013 at 6:29 AM

    karynr – YES! Try telling my fiancé that!!

  10. pthepro49

    June 7, 2013 at 9:09 AM

    RS-Why on Gods earth would you post that Reno story on your website?? That was the most boring story I have ever read in my life!! Do your readers a favor and don’t post long ass boring stories like that ever again! What a waste of time! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

  11. JovisMom

    June 7, 2013 at 10:46 AM

    Toliet paper goes over!!! That is how they do it at fancy hotels! So they can make it to a point at the bottom and put that gold round (Hallmarkish) sticker on! 😉

  12. iheartvino

    June 7, 2013 at 10:58 AM

    I’m with Jovi- toilet paper goes over!! Not necessarily because that’s how hotels do it, but because it’s more sanitary. Have you ever looked at the wall behind the TP at places/homes where they put it under? Gross. That being said, I consider it a small victory whenever anyone else besides me puts on a new roll, regardless of which way they put it. #whyamItalkingaboutTP haha

  13. jamiefsu9

    June 7, 2013 at 2:12 PM

  14. crushonspivey

    June 7, 2013 at 2:21 PM

    I’d say Robert looked more like Chad Lowe than Rob Lowe.

    Just sayin.

  15. chefmom3

    June 7, 2013 at 4:28 PM

    Hahahahaha The Notebook this isn’t – how are you still single??? There must be some smart single women out there for you!!

  16. Sunnyside422

    June 8, 2013 at 8:38 AM

    Had to comment on the toilet paper rolls. Always the over in my girlhood home and now in mine. Easier to tear off for sure. Under makes it harder to tear and just darn uncomfortable grabbing the paper that way. Try it over some time and see.

    Robert is definitely a Rob Lowe lookalike. I kept looking at him wondering where I had seen a similar face…waaa laaa! Thanks for the observation.

    I don’t find Des boring…just very uncomfortable in her roll as the lead. I think she will become more outgoing and relaxed as the weeks go by. After all, she is in command and should realize that.

  17. rob22

    June 10, 2013 at 6:48 AM

    Regarding the “Reno” story. I don’t think it’s uncommon to sort of “pine” for someone we chose not to have at the time. Maybe a lot of of us fantasize about our High School or College sweetheart. But, that’s all it is. It’s not reality, and those relationships ended for a reason. Not to mention that the significant others in question were 20+ years younger at the time. They’re different people now. But given the full story, what we have here is a woman who has a series of failed relationships, including at least, a couple of failed marriages. Basically, she’s screwed up every relationship she’s been in, and is now getting wistful for a relationship that never was a relationship. I’d point out all the drama that has gone on with this “couple” even though they’ve only actually seen each other a few times. Play that out over a marriage. Wow!! Look, she rejected the relationship several times in the past when she could have rekindled. She chose not to. If this was “destiny” then she would have made sure to have made it happen far before now. The reality is, whoever this woman is with, she will screw it up. She has the crazies going on in that head of hers, and no guy is going to fix that. My suggestion would be to get some therapy before launching into another failed relationship. It seems she is just repeating patterns that are going nowhere. This guy is not the answer. Get help soon!

  18. sarah771978

    June 10, 2013 at 3:05 PM

    Steve needs to always link Sara Herron’s Bach Chat to his posts, if only for more comments like this…

    “The only thing worth pointing out about the date was the “antique” journal Zak W gave Des. This would be a very kind gesture if I wasn’t sure Zak trained his penis to hold a pen and write the message inscribed. Such a creep.”

    Who knew that meek little thing that had no self esteme on Sean’s season was so freaking funny!

  19. randais

    June 10, 2013 at 6:25 PM

    OOOH I watched tonight, no reason to watch again, except maybe to see if RS got anything else wrong…Zack, in fact, did NOT win the preview date with Des, Juan Pablo did….!

  20. fordsc

    June 10, 2013 at 8:39 PM

    Also on Tinder: Reid Rosenthal. He always comes up for me when I’m around the Philly area – his hometown

  21. elizabeth82

    June 10, 2013 at 8:50 PM

    @randais: Totally noticed that too. So then I was thinking, OK then Zak must get the rose on the date . . . but no, that went to James (pity rose IMO–she’s taking after Sean that way!).

    Brandon should be in therapy if he isn’t already. Des was so not feeling the “I have a secret” kiss–looked to me like she was almost going to not go along with it. And telling her he’s falling in love with her? Yeesh, guess the false environment of the show was really getting to him.

    The Brian girlfriend drama went on too long. And was totally the Stephanie show–both Chris and Des kept trying to get a word in edgewise with little success. Funny how Brian was like, “I came here to find love” and then a little while later Chris basically says, “So did you sleep with Stephanie two days before you came on the show?” “Yes . . .”

  22. elizabeth82

    June 10, 2013 at 8:55 PM

    Check out Steve’s Twitter for a bunch of thoughts on this episode already. Re. his error: “Oops. Thought it was Zak that got the movie. Guess it’s Juan Pablo. Oh well. Shoot me.”

    I don’t care about the error (little), kind of like last season when he had said that Sarah eliminated herself in the episode where Sean cut her before the rose ceremony.

  23. jackie22

    June 11, 2013 at 5:12 AM

    Anyone else notice last night that in Mikey’s ITM during the dodge ball game, that he was clean shaven, but when he was playing dodge ball he was all scruffy? Oh the editing.

  24. rob22

    June 11, 2013 at 8:39 AM

    So, Brooks pulls a Tiara by completely coming apart at the seems because he broke his finger? Wow. Look, I’ve had broken fingers, so I know they’re no picnic. But I was never half passed out on a gurney. In fact, I was driven to the emergency room where I received no pain killer and was outiftted with a splint. The doctors were none to careful with my finger as they moved it around either. It would never even occurred to me to even lie down during the whole event. Could this guy be any more of a wimp? And with the stringy hair, high pitched voice, and dog teeth, what exactly to we have here? It’s hard to explain, but it’s not attractive.

  25. Dianne

    June 11, 2013 at 9:31 AM

    Rob22 – everyone’s different, and everyone reacts to pain differently. There’s NO WAY Brooks should be compared to Tiara..she was one of a kind, and all of her so-call ailments were fake. Brooks’s injury was not.

  26. Sunnyside422

    June 11, 2013 at 9:58 AM

    Didn’t watch the whole show, but did see Brooks and his widdle finger injury. Please remember folks that this whole show is about drama and angst. For sure his “injury” was played up to the hilt. Really…lying down for a broken finger!! Common…not believable and I bet when he sees the playback, probably wants to hide!

    As for Ben…nothing new in the portrayal this season of the bad boy getting on everyone’s nerves. Done every season. A standard element of this show. Obviously, the few men who find him annoying are not gonna advance and probably know it as they are very unattractive in every way.

  27. randais

    June 11, 2013 at 10:24 AM

    NOOOOOOO twitter for me. Tried it, hated it, and now I avoid it like the plague. Nice that RS acknowledged his blunder, I suppose ;).

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