Reality Steve

Dr. Reality Steve

“Reader Emails,” “Dr. Reality Steve,” the New Bachelor-Inspired Dating App & an Audition Video

Most of the time when I write a column, I don’t remember half the sh** I say by the next day. That’s just the way it is. When I write until 1am Tuesday morning, then wake up a few hours later to finish the rest of the column, I’m essentially speeding through the whole thing. I don’t really proofread my stuff until after I post it (or until many of you feel the need to correct me which you love doing…thank you), and I think for as many words as I write, I’m able to keep grammatical errors to a minimum. Usually, it’s my punctuation that sucks, which I’ll admit. But the last thing I care about when trying to post this column is if I’m punctuating correctly. Just not high on my list of priorities. I’m usually trying to squeeze in some 80’s movie clip or making sure that I can post another video that’ll stick in your head all day. Sure, if it’s glaring mistake then I’ll go back and correct it immediately, but for the most part, I leave it as is.

With that said, not 10 minutes after Tuesday’s column went up, I received these three emails:


Love reading your column, it always makes my Tuesdays more enjoyable. I was noticing in your Haiku today that you had the 5-7-5 format right, but unfortunately, you didn’t follow the sequence. Your haiku is 5-7-9. In the last sentence, “ever” and “again” are two syllable words. I still think you’re great and I hope you don’t get mad at me for correcting you. Thanks for all you do.

Dear Reality Steve,

Your haiku today is wrong. You should probably fix it before you get more emails like this :). Your first sentence has six syllables instead of five. It’s ok. I still thought it was funny. Take care…

Hello…funny that a guy who calls out Chris for his poems can’t even write one himself. Your haiku is totally off and has more syllables than it should. Figures you’d get it wrong. But I’m sure you’ll come up with some excuse as to why you got it wrong or blame someone’s parents. Ha ha ha ha ha. Just thought I’d correct you since you love being so smug.

So yeah, three people telling me the exact same thing, yet said in three different ways. Amazing how under some people’s skin I can get just by messing up a haiku. And yes, I blame their parents. The funny thing is, I was even counting the syllables on my fingers when I wrote the haiku and not for a second did I think that “ever” and “again” were two syllable words until I looked them up. Stupid me. So just to please all the professional haiku writers out there, let me re-do my haiku from Tuesday so all of America will be happy.

Chris your poem sucks (5)
Sucks so bad it hurts my head (7)
Don’t write another (5)

There we go. I feel much better about myself. I hope you all do too.

The big story that came down yesterday was that Chris Harrison and Mike Fleiss have now created a dating app called “At First Sight.” I mean, I think they did. Couldn’t really tell by how many times they tweeted and re-tweeted about it yesterday. Here’s the premise: It’s Tinder with videos. That’s all. Although, if you go to the app store on your phone and look at the description for “At First Sight,” here’s what you get when it talks about it’s rating:

Rating: You must be 17 years old to download this app.

Mature/Suggestive Themes
-Infrequent/Mild Alcohol, Tobacco, or Drug Use References
-Frequent/Intense Profanity or Crude Humor
-Frequent/Intense Sexual Content or Nudity

Wait, huh? Is this app an “R” rated movie or something? Do your parents have to accompany you to download it? Whatever the case, they are promoting it big time. So much that even I got an email about it yesterday from some PR company. Here’s what it said:

Hi Steve,
Reaching out with exciting news to share of a new dating app from “The Bachelor” host Chris Harrison and the show’s creator Mike Fleiss.

That’s right, Chris and Mike have set out to help the millions of (normal) bachelors and bachelorettes out there who are looking to find love. The new “At First Sight” app launched today combines learnings from years of The Bachelor – including the power of video as a casting tool that helps give a true sense of a person quickly – with behind-the-scenes technology, to create a new kind of online dating that helps singles make genuine connections. Here are just a few features that make At First Sight unique:

·Short videos give members a chance to experience a little of that right-out-of-the-limo spark
·Video prompts are similar to Bachelor/Bachelorette casting questions – carefully crafted to help cut through the clutter to reveal who people really upon first impression
· Limits on the number of messages you can send or receive each day, to prevent spam and encourage people to reach out thoughtfully for the right reasons
· Guards and protects users with security features such as custom privacy settings, pre-screened content and messaging limits
· The option to accept or deny all chat requests. AKA, “will you accept this rose?”

More info in the release below and via this link you’ll see a great video demo from Chris Harrison showing the ease of use of the app.

Can I provide more info, images or video assets to help you share this exciting news with your readers?

Looks like some PR firm forgot to take me off their mailing list on that one. I don’t think they were sitting in a room saying, “Hey, make sure you tell Reality Steve to promote this. He’s always been great to us.” Anything for my boys, Christopher and Mikey. There’s your free pub for today reaching a gazillion readers. I’ll expect my commission check in a month.

And finally, every once in a while, I’ll get an email about the “Bachelor” auditions, and someone who went to go audition or whatever. June is a big month for them doing casting calls, and someone sent me this video of a girl they know that applied that’s a blogger ( She’s already recapped her audition in Seattle from this past weekend and this was the video she sent in. I gotta say, I have no idea if this girl will get cast or not, but just on production value alone, I’d think this is one of the better audition tapes they’ve gotten. I’m sure they’ve received thousands over the years, and I’ve watched maybe 3 total, but this is the best of the three. I just get the impression that most people just sit in front of a camera and talk, then show clips of them interacting with other people, or out doing some activity. Sure, she might need a little more practice on that Lumineers song on the guitar, but to splice it in with the original song I thought was very clever. The only thing wrong with her video is her saying she wants to be on the show because she’s ready to fall in love. Oh Sabrina, haven’t you learned by now? This show isn’t about love. Never was and never will be. But I get that you have to say that to butter them up a bit, so I’ll give you a free pass. Check out Sabrina’s video and good luck to her.

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  1. bostoncpa

    June 20, 2013 at 12:49 PM

    To the emailer who has a problem with people having 2 cell phones- that makes no sense to me. I have a work cell and a personal cell phone, and so do a lot of people I work with. The company doesn’t require it, but when I was using one phone for both purposes, it basically resulted in me constantly checking work emails and never getting a break from the office (including vacations, since I wasn’t going to leave my phone behind). So, just the fact that someone has two phones means nothing. I also never give out my work number except to clients and coworkers. I think the only problem with that you wrote is that the guy wouldn’t give out his personal number. It’s really not that fact that he has two.

  2. matchmaker

    June 20, 2013 at 3:38 PM

    The “At First Sight” app, just like The Bach, likely will not produce a very high percentage of successful relationships. I say this because I’m developing a dating app for release next year. These dating app developers just do not seem to get it. The most popular dating apps and are really poor at matching couples into long-term soul-mate kinds of relationships. My app has already demonstrated good results, using’s Ready For Love as a public proof-of-concept test bed. Was able to predict the F2’s for two of the bach’s before the second episode of RFL was even aired. One F2 (Sara) even “liked” my choice (see if you don’t believe me). I think folks have just come to expect poor experiences with online dating apps. I’m open to any suggestions also. So follow me if you have any. The app is only for folks who are only interested in finding a long-term soul-mate kind of relationship. Which I am very good at identifying, and is the core part of this brand new technology.

  3. CarolH

    June 20, 2013 at 4:32 PM

    Loved Sabrina’s video…she is adorable and I hope she gets on the show.

  4. agatha bee

    June 20, 2013 at 6:24 PM

    I got about a minute of the video watched and went into sugar shock. She’s too goofy for me to take seriously.

  5. Athena

    June 20, 2013 at 6:44 PM

    I’m glad that Steve knew that “poem” was two syllables, not one 🙂 Just another reason to know that it’s good that he’s writing these recaps and not me.

  6. JovisMom

    June 21, 2013 at 10:01 AM

    @ matchmaker – I disagree w\ you 100% on the app not being a good one. I met by boyfriend on that and we have been together for 2 years now. Talking moving in and marriage. The POF is garbage – I’ll give you that.

  7. bigfatwoman

    June 21, 2013 at 10:27 AM

    Watched the Sabrina video…..adorable in a certain way, but also a little much for me. I wish sometimes that I could be like that….all smiley and cartwheel-y and quippy and looking up to the sky-e….but alas it is just not me.

    I suspect she has higher aspirations than the Bachelor.

  8. someonesomewhere

    June 21, 2013 at 11:39 AM

    To the person whose boyfriend shaves his legs… You would be surprised by why cyclists shave! It is not because leg hairs get tangled in the wheel spokes or to improve streamlining. It’s actually because of “road rash.” Cyclists fall and skid across the road or path, ripping up their skin and getting rocks and dirt into the cuts. If they have body hair, it gets in the blood and dirt and sticks under the scabs. The hairs irritate the healing skin just like ingrowns. Its gross and painful. They learn to shave after the first time this happens! The serious cyclists I’ve known shave their legs, arms, and any other hairy body parts. My ex-boyfriend, still a wonderful guy, is a cyclist and he shaved before every ride because hair in road rash is so awful. Don’t worry about it!

  9. randais

    June 23, 2013 at 2:47 PM

    “Crossing Lines” and “Whodunnit”, both premiering tonight, who’s watching?

  10. elizabeth82

    June 23, 2013 at 9:42 PM

    @randais: I watched “Whodunnit.” Love Clue, love Agatha Christie’s And Then There Were None–enough for me to tune in. I found it entertaining–just weird that apparently the person chosen to be eliminated has to act out an elaborate death scenario–what’s up with that? Weird, no? And one of those people is really an actor? Or what? Those things are confusing/unexplained by the show.

  11. ccrider

    June 24, 2013 at 5:50 AM

    @matchmaker and jovi…..I met my boyfriend on POF and he’s been such a blessing in my life for almost 2 years now.

    @randais….I watched Whodunnit and thought it was kind of hokey. It felt too much like a scripted show….like they have it all planned out already who’s going when and how. I’ll probably keep watching but only because there’s nothing else on Sunday nights to watch.

  12. everglades

    June 24, 2013 at 11:38 AM

    I wonder if Steve will mention Emily O’Brien’s engagement too?! poor guy is shooting 0-2 now in that department.

  13. randais

    June 24, 2013 at 4:50 PM

    Elizabeth and cc – it WAS confusing but I’m still curious. I agree with it being a bit ‘hokey” but nothings more “hokey” than the Bach/ette so I could do worse ;D. Interesting how this is playing out, when you consider everyone (well almost everyone) will have to “play out their own death”, I mean they can’t ALL be actors so they must be well rehearsed you’d think. At the end of the show it stated, “Eliminations are based on the performance of participants on a written exam testing their knowledge of the crimes”. We didn’t get to see that, the exam. I do think the dramatics and hysteria are over blown but I’m curious to see how the cougar plays into it as well as the explosion that appears to throw a body way up into the air.

  14. randais

    June 24, 2013 at 4:56 PM

    Under the Dome, premieres tonight. I AM looking forward to this one, hope it lives up to my expectations :D.

  15. randais

    June 24, 2013 at 7:16 PM

    Under the Dome – Really? They had to show a cow being sliced in half! Ewwww.the gore factor is already rivaling The Following. Jury’s still out on this one.

  16. randais

    June 24, 2013 at 7:19 PM

    Best lines of the night, so far:
    “What if the government built this thing?”
    “Doubt it”
    “Because it works”.

  17. everglades

    June 25, 2013 at 6:58 AM

    *Under the dome*
    all in all: good first episode
    in comparison to the book: s**t. They’ve changed a lot that I’m not so sure will work out for them. It changes the storyline completely. Not liking that at all.

  18. JovisMom

    June 25, 2013 at 10:00 AM

    @ ccrider – You are a lucky one in that case. I have several friends who met guys on POF… All of them were nightmares. Several lied about things apperance, marital status, kids, etc. One actually stalked my friend for some time and she had to get a restraining order. In MOST cases you get what you pay for.

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