Reality Steve

Dr. Reality Steve

The Passing of Gia Allemand, “Reader Emails,” & “Dr. Reality Steve”

Dear Steve:

I’ve been a follower for a few years, but I’ve never written. After reading all the nonsense on this season and emails, I’m surprised no one mentioned (unless I somehow missed it), that everything seemed fake at the end because of the editing! Everything leading up to the finale was edited to make it look like Des had already made her choice/was in love with Brooks (and only Brooks) for a couple of weeks. They have never let that air prior to the finale before – in fact, quite the opposite! They always make it look like the lead is falling in love with more than one person (whether true or not). Even Chris H himself (not that you can necessarily believe anything he says) had written in his blog that Des had in fact talked to him of falling for Chris as well, but that it wasn’t aired — duh! How else do you keep the surprise? I am sure that Des wasn’t acting and was devastated that Brooks left on his own – rejection, and having the decision taken away from her – but I don’t think it was a sudden “turnaround” re: Chris. And if you ask me, she dodged a bullet with Brooks. Chris is the better man, and there is a glimmer of a chance it could work for them (though I doubt it… the odds are against it). It was also better that she dumped Drew before going through the pretense of meeting the parents and a proposal (a la Ashley dumping Ben at that point).

It’s very much like with Jason, who obviously had strong feelings for both Melissa and Molly, and was “forced” to decide between them within the show’s timeframe, and made the “wrong” choice! Everyone hated him at the ATFR when he “dumped” Melissa, but even at the time I actually admired that he had the guts to do what he did and come out honestly in admitting his mistake and ask Molly for a 2nd chance!
Keep on truckin’ Steve. You keep it interesting…

Comment: Sure, like I said, Des obviously cared about Chris and has feelings for him, but to say that they were stronger than those she had for Brooks? No. I’ll never believe that.

I am a fourth grade teacher who actually teaches 9 and 10 year olds to write poetry.
Chris’ poetry would be the WORST in the class. By far!!
No rhythm, rhyme, meter, alliteration, or other items vital to poetry.
His writings are more just simple journal entries.
Bad ones at that.

Comment: Well get used to it, because now Chris is even publishing his poetry according to Desiree’s Instagram page. I honestly thought that was a joke, but apparently it’s not. Man, there will ones of people lined up to buy that book.

Hi Steve! (Fourth time writing you!)

Ok so quick I have to agree with some of your reader emails- I read your site every season and I love knowing the spoilers BUT given how boring des’s season was- I agree- it kind of made it fun that you were wrong! My mother in law was like “good now you can stop reading them!” And I was like “no way!” Haha but it was fun for this time since her season sucked so bad! It was a nice twist in the ending haha

A few things- I know you know that the contestants (previous and current) read your blog. Duh… But! Did you see

1. Jenna Burke tweeted last week “what! Reality Steve was wrong!?”
2. Ali saying she knows the spoiler was out there and was glad it was wrong and
3. Brooks acknowledging that the spoiler was out and people thinking it was him the last 2 months was tough on him. Boo hoo

Haha the only reason I bring that up is because even the past and current contestants openly admit to reading your site!! I love it!!

Kind of a random question- if you had a serious live in girlfriend- would she be aware of your sources? Or would you always always always keep that private even from someone as close to you as a girlfriend, fiancé, wife etc. just curious!

Until JP’s season!!! 🙂

Comment: I didn’t see Jenna’s tweet. I’m surprised Jenna even acknowledged me. She is not a fan of mine after I relayed the story about her making out with Sean at the Real Beanz event last summer in NY when he knew he was set to be the Bachelor, but it hadn’t been made official yet. She was none too happy about that story. I guess the truth hurts. Just be glad I didn’t share the story that went along with her hookup with Sean that weekend which would’ve made the situation look worse. You’re welcome.

As I’ve said many times before, do past contestants read every single column word for word? No. But are they all aware of who I am and what I’m saying? I’m sure they are since they’re told by producers to stay away from me. They all know what the spoiler is that’s out there every season. Some acknowledge it, some don’t. It’s fine. I get what they have to do.

Hi there!
My question is simple.
I know that this probably varies season to season, but if you had to guess and give a percentage of what is altered, provoked, and downright fake… What would it be?
I think it’s probably 65% fake. Thanks!
I just started reading your blog this season, and I enjoy it. 🙂

Comment: I’ll go with 85/15 that it’s fake and manipulated.

Hey Steve, I don’t get how and why they cast Juan Pablo to be the bachelor of ALL other bachelor that have been on this show. JP being the bachelor has to be bleachable moment in this season. I honestly can’t stand him and I do not find attractive what so ever. I bet by the end of Juan Pablo’s season he won’t be nearly as popular as he was. Oh one last thing do you think they will cast Drew Kenney to be the next bachelor for 2015( I would love it) it he’s still a single by the time.

PS I bet the haters will come back on your blog to see the contestants ( to trash them) and to see who JP picks

Comment: I’m sure everyone enjoyed that email. I certainly did.

Hey Steve,

(Insert gratuitous opening statement here about how much you love the column, blah blah blah. Or don’t).

1. What is the possibility that ABC spoiled your spoiler by deliberately manipulating the penultimate episode? Like, giving Brooks a little something-something under the table in exchange for bailing when he did, and being forever quiet about this. Or maybe he was a very well-trained and cultivated Venus flytrap plant, designed, trained and cultivated to ensnare the Des bug. It seems just so obvious, because he really did not give her what I would have considered to be a very good reason for doing what he did. I mean, come on. Who has a change of heart all of a sudden, just like that? Saying, “When I was away from you, I wasn’t feeling it?” Odd – because then why was he supposedly “feeling it” only when he was with her? See, Brooks was never in love with her in any way, but he did a great job leading her to believe he was.

I’ve considered perhaps it was a superb editing job, but the evidence weighs against this when you consider how genuinely Des reacted to his rather lame break-up reasoning. She can’t possibly be that good of an actress. And, to hold up this theory, they would have needed Des to be kept in the dark all along in order to be strung-along by Brooks.

One reason I didn’t like this season was because I saw Des as someone who is very gullible and easy to manipulate, but when you think about it, that’s exactly the type of person ABC needs to make a ruse like this work. I almost threw my frozen yogurt at my TV when I heard her rationalizing the Brooks fiasco by saying, “Sometimes love is unpredictable.” No Des, that’s not love. That’s a line that was fed to her by a very smooth psychoanalyst.

Of course, to ever suggest such an atrocious manipulation without proof is pretty libelous; and we’d both be digging out from under a pile of lawsuits faster than Brooks’ one-way flight from Antigua. So my disclaimer is that this is just speculation on my part.

2. It’s time to talk about the concept of spoilers, in general. What the hell is ABC’s problem with this? I actually like to know how a show ends before I watch the FIRST episode. I admit, I am a total geek about human nature and human relations, and knowing the end result gives me the perfect opportunity to analyze people’s behavior and determine why someone prevails and why they don’t; and why the hell they end up on a show like this in the first place. If ABC had half a twit of business sense, they could put you out of commission by simply putting on their own web page what the ending is, with a *** SPOILER ALERT *** warning, of course. Does ABC think people won’t watch if they know how it ends? Stupid. It might have a .001% reduction in the ratings. The people who don’t watch are not going to watch regardless of what they know about the end. For the people that do watch, they either do want to know or they don’t. Why not cater to everyone equally? So, thanks for manning up and doing what ABC does not have the balls to do and allowing me to indulge in an interesting pastime on Monday nights besides Ancient Aliens reruns on the History channel.

3. I’m personally glad she chose Chris and I do hope they make it down the aisle, the slim chance of success notwithstanding. I’m an Oregonian, and most of us are really decent people. Call me biased, but I actually think Chris is way too good for Des. There’s something in her past that she has not yet dealt with, and until she gets to a good therapist, I don’t think she has what it takes to sustain a long-term relationship.

That’s all for now. Thanks for listening.

Comment: 1) There’s been talk and speculation that Brooks was paid to do that, or they hired him to play the part yada yada yada. I’m not buying it. Based on what I’d heard about the guy (and something I even wrote in a column before the first episode even aired), that this guy was not ready to get married. And he basically proved that since that’s essentially the reason he walked off the show. Guess I should’ve listened to the info I was given yet again. Man, this whole season was right under my nose and I never saw it.

2) No program in the history of television wants to spoil their own show. It’s never happened. Sure, there are spoilers out there even for scripted shows, but it’s not like those shows are promoting it. Like, “Hey, this next season of ’24’ is gonna be great. Go to to read all about what happens this season!” No way. So it’s not an ABC thing, it’s a TV thing. They would definitely lose viewership if the show themselves are spoiling it. If an outside person is, then it’s different. Only adds intrigue. There’s a major difference.

3) Hey, be quiet. Des is fully convinced she’s in love. Of course, if you listen to the voice of reason this season, Nate Hartsock, even he’ll tell you Des is just settling because she wants to be married so bad and has no problem telling the public about it.

Ok, so here is my funny story. I have watched every season of this ridiculous show. I started out thinking it was real and after Trista and Ryan, I was all in. Somewhere in the next few seasons, I realized that it wasn’t real and got smart. I still watched every episode and dvr’d the whole season. I still love the fantasy dates and love the dream of wow, I want to go on a date there with my hubby. That’s what keeps me watching. And the fact that I love watching people make out on tv, but that’s a whole nother sickness I have. Don’t judge me…

Any ways, on to the funny. My son is 17 years old and never watches the show, thinks its stupid. However, all his girl “friends” at school watch and think it’s real, hopeless romantics. So every season, I give him your spoilers and he pisses them all off by telling them who wins. It’s hilarous. They come over to my house and yell at me for telling him who wins. He and I get a bunch of laughs at seeing how pissed off they get over him spoiling the show. I guess it’s our torture of the 17 year old hopeless romantic teenage girls. So this year after the finale, he gets all these hate tweets from about 4 different girls about how he’s an ass and he was wrong. It was awesome!!! Funny sh*t right there.

I am sure he will keep getting the spoilers from me and keep pissing them off every season regardless of whether you are wrong or right. I guess its our Mother and Son bonding.. ha ha ha ha…

Thanks for making the season interesting (love your episode recap) and for being wrong and making the finale much more exciting..

Keep up the good work!!

Comment: Uh oh. Did I prevent your teenage son from getting some action? Man, tell him I’m sorry. Never get in the way of teenage love.

Hi Steve,

Great column – thanks for all your work. I only watch the show because of you.

Maybe you’ve gotten these questions before (if so, sorry!) but I haven’t seen them in the reader emails.

1) Did you see Ali’s E! Online Column, where she explains how she picked Chris as the winner? She said that she “dissect[s] the editing each season to try and figure out who the winner is,” which seems like her way of saying that she has no inside information. And yet, she also said (in answer to when contestents tell their family about the winner), “I know Desiree told her family right away as well.”

So, if she has inside information that Desiree told her family “right away” about the winner, doesn’t it seem like she would also have inside information about who the winner actually was? I am dubious that the editting alone led her to Chris. Just my bit of armchair detective work to share!

2) I’ve noticed that the show never has couples (or the contestants in the house) talk about normal things like college, work, politics, hobbies, movies, sports, etc. All conversations focus on past relationships and a little bit about family. If they do pull in work-related talk, it usually is to make the person seem super boring (like the solar energy guy from Ali’s(?) season) or weird (like the mortician). Do you think that the producers have specific “off limits” topics for all conversations through the filming and/or do they simply edit those topics out of the final cut?

Thanks again!! Keep up the humor and spoilers.

Comment: 1) It’s a known fact that Desiree and Ali saw each at least 2 or 3 times while the show was airing. So is it far fetched to think that maybe Desiree didn’t at least hint towards Chris? Of course not. Did she flat out tell her “I’m engaged to Chris?” Who knows? But I’m not naïve enough to think that considering Ali spent time with her, and constantly talked about spending time with her, that maybe she either knew something or picked up on something. People talk. Plain and simple.

2) They will tell them either going into a conversation, “Hey, you guys should talk about this” or “Ask about this,” etc. If the topic veers another way, they’ll just edit it out and get them back on track to talking about stuff they want them to talk about.

Hey Steve first of all i want to say i love your blog. It truly enhances watching the show.
It doesn’t matter if you are right or wrong about who ends up with who, it’s just a show and every time I read your blog i discover things i didnt notice the first time around.

1) Heck even in Des’ season and after following your blog I was pixel viewing my screen during the entire finale in some expectation to see Brooks’ hairdo hidden behind palm trees. Speaking of enhancing a show without Photoshop.

I bet thousands of steve fans (me among them) expected brooks to show up in the after the final rose show to admit he was wrong and he wanted her back etc…talking about a great blog!

2) they should start Reality Steve viewing parties. Steve crashing living rooms full of girls (and occassionaly some lonewolf guy) flying from town to town with private jets and live streams to the website.

cheers steve, keep on doing the great work.

Comment: 1) I’m right there with you. With 5 minutes left in the show I still thought somehow it was gonna be Brooks. That’s how confident I was in what I was told.

2) The only viewing parties I can do would be for the premiere and the finale. During the season it’s just too hard because the column takes forever to write. I have to start writing once the show is over or else I’ll never finish in time with as many distractions as I have, and if I’m at a viewing party, I’d be missing too much while it’s airing, then I’d have to come home and watch it AGAIN, which is something I have no interest in doing.

But hey, anyone wants to fly me around in private jets to crash estrogen filled watch parties, I’m all in. Where do I sign up?

Juan Pablo’s tweets..I can’t even handle them. We have to seriously listen to this guy all next season? I think I’ll just watch so I can hear your analysis each week. This is going to be the most ridiculous season ever.

Comment: It’s becoming more and more abundantly clear that this is going to be a 2 month vacation for JP and the last thing he really cares about in all this is finding a wife. All the more reason this could be a successful season.

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  1. karynr

    August 15, 2013 at 12:44 PM

    Fleiss and his crew of puppets have no class whatsoever. “Blow me Reality Steve”…all I can say is, I’m really glad you get under their skin. Whether you’re right or wrong, you try hard to bring us the latest and greatest, and they should kiss your butt for the attention you bring to the show. Mills comment shows exactly what type of people they are……sleazy and ignorant.

  2. mommyof2

    August 15, 2013 at 1:06 PM

    Looks like you and Elan Gale agree on something here: he just tweeted his disgust for the media’s “crack” reporting on Gia’s death. The media is all about sensationalizing everything. My heart goes out to Gia’s family and friends. It’s very sad, for sure. I don’t know Gia, of course, but from what I saw of her on The Bachelor and Bachelor Pad, I really liked her a lot.

    Also, Elan Gale just tweeted something about how Jesse Czinczak (sp.?) was a jerk to tweet out sonething negative about Gia. Deanna Stagliano responded to his tweet with “such a tool”- referring to Jesse. I noticed Elan has since deleted his tweet, as has Jesse.

  3. karynr

    August 15, 2013 at 2:19 PM

    RIP Gia. From all account, she sounded like she was a genuinely nice person. My thoughts and prayers are with her family and friends. This is so, so sad.

  4. mommyof2

    August 15, 2013 at 3:15 PM

    Elan Gale just tweeted that he deleted his last series of tweets b/c the person he spoke of has a name that isn’t worthy of even negative attention. I applaud him for that. Gia’s death is tragic, and it’s negative people like Elan was referring to who hurt those around them. I think I remember RS years ago mentioning that he didn’t like that person, too, so they have this in common…. RIP, Gia.

  5. ashleigh11

    August 15, 2013 at 6:32 PM

    I was so gutted to hear about Gia. She has always been my favourite person from the Bachelor Nation gang so it was extra disheartening. She just seemed like such a lovely warm-hearted spirit and carried herself with a lot of class. Walking out on Bachelor Pad 2 and refusing to participate in that dumb kissing contest showed a lot of integrity. She just seemed very sensitive and emotional, as many artistic souls are, and obviously had been through a lot of heartbreak. She will definitely be missed… RIP beautiful girl. Although you may not have found that elusive fairytale ending, you were indeed loved by many.

  6. justforfun

    August 15, 2013 at 8:26 PM

    RIP Gia.

    The really sad part about all the comments made by the media & others is how uneducated our society is about mental illness. I was a volunteer many years ago for the suicide hotline in my city. We had to go through some intense training, and it was such an eye opening experience.
    People don’t commit suicide because of boyfriend troubles. It’s because they have some type of mental illness, depression being a common one. The chemical imbalance in their brain takes them to a very dark place that is hard to climb out of without professional help. Mental illness can strike anyone, young or old, beautiful and successful.
    Even today there is still shame surrounding mental illness, and that prevents many from seeking help. Many people think “what do they have to be depressed about, they are _______”. Fill in the blank with anything you want, beautiful, successful, rich, talented. These stupid comments are made because of lack of education regarding mental illness.
    I think it’s a tragedy anytime a life is lost to mental illness.

  7. freeasabird

    August 16, 2013 at 8:49 AM

    Rest In Peace, Gia.

    Have to agree with so many others. She was my favorite. She had enough class to leave Bachelor Pad.

  8. freeasabird

    August 16, 2013 at 9:17 AM

    I finally unfollowed Des and Chris on Twitter. I usually don’t follow the contestants for very long after the season anyway. The final straw was the photo of the cover of their book of poems. Yep, Des has some in there too.

    I was following JuanPaul. What a tool! I’ve unfollowed him and occasionally just glance at his Twitter page. Someone asked him about his use of erratic CAPS. His answer was something like “Because I can.”

    Gotta agree with RS on the semi-beards. I just don’t get it. I sure hope JuanPaul at least shaves his neck before filming. My husband has a beard but it’s just the right length and he is diligent about keeping it trimmed and shaves his neck everyday. I remember how scratchy it was when he first started growing it.

    The first reader email was difficult to read. The one that started out “my disclaimer – this is long, there’s spelling/grammar errors, & ur awesome” Does the writer mean “you are” or “your?” I think they need to buy a few vowels. “ppl” for “people?” I understand typing on a small phone keyboard – if that what was done but jeepers don’t all keyboards give you a choice of at least three words if you start typing something? Or maybe the person is just a Twitter-head and can’t type anything without thinking they have to shorten it? I love Twitter but I try my darndest to type out words when not on Twitter (even on my phone.)

    Sounds like RS has a few “butt chicks” already for JuanPaul’s season – or so he tweeted. The “butt chicks” was a JuanPaul tweet about his derriere being sore from exercise. Hard to believe it was a typo as the letters aren’t even close to each other on the keypad.

    Should be a fun season – at least for a while. I don’t envy the producers that have to try to control JuanPaul.

  9. lmichelle

    August 17, 2013 at 2:32 PM

    When I told my mom a former bachelorette contestant was in critical condition and died she asked who and I told her it was Gia. Now, my mom doesn’t follow the bachelor much like I do and is VERY bad at remember names (even the name of a movie we just watched). I was shocked when she immediately knew who I was talking about. She remembered her so well and said she stood out from the crowd. For not even knowing her you could tell how sweet and sensitive of a presence she was.

  10. rob22

    August 18, 2013 at 4:30 PM

    It’s funny how people will stick with formulas, even when the situation calls for something else. The Bachelor seems bound and determined to stick to their formula of using someone from the prior Bachelorette season even when the situation screams for an alternative. This year, the top 3 yielded an effeminate, but possibly straight, guy who bangs 50 year olds…. and a flaming homosexual. Then you have a guy who showed up day 1 without his shirt on & turns out to be the Good Humor ice cream man. I guess we can thank God he wasn’t the paper boy. Nope, so far. After that you had guys who were total tools or were blatantly pimping themselves to be The Bachelor… before they even got voted off the show. Nope. So, you go down to the guy they barely showed. Throw him on MTA for five minutes, and voila, it’s Juan Pah-blow…. who’s main contribution is that he’s got a sexy body and a foreign accent. Now the guy is making a total fool of himself on Twitter and is showing at least some of the reason he got zero air time during the season. The situation screamed for MF to call an audible. Try something new. But, he stuck to the formula. Now he’s got a language challenged, complete fool, showing his idiocy daily on social media. #jumpingtheshark

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