Reality Steve

The Bachelorette 10 - Andi

The “Bachelorette” Andi Episode 4 Recap Including My Thought’s on How Eric’s Departure Was Handled

-The show starts out with Andi arriving in New England first and walking about pretending like she knows a thing about the culture. Then of course, we get voiceovers from Chris saying, “One place I’ve always wanted to travel to is New England.” He’s making it seem like New England is on the other side of the world. Then again, when you’re corn bumpkin from the middle of Iowa, I guess you would think of New England as somewhere exotic. Then when Chris arrives at Mohegan Sun, he just about loses his sh**. “Hands down this is the nicest hotel I’ve ever stayed in.” What??? Mohegan Sun. It’s possible that the Revel in NJ looks at Mohegan Sun and kinda chuckles at how average it is. But hey, we are talking about Chris here so any building with running water, taller than a tractor, and where you don’t have to kill your own dinner is probably 5 star to him. I can only imagine what he’ll think of France, Italy, Belgium, and the Dominican Republic. The guy might wet himself.

-JJ gets the date card and I guess they told the guys to ramp up the excitement since there was a lot of cheering and clapping for a tall, gangly dude walking over and grabbing a 4 x 6 card. Easy there fellas. He’s only going to read to you, not start making it rain from money in the envelope. The card reads: “Our relationship is picking up steam.” Get it? Train? Locomotive? Steam? Man, they are so good with words. I wish I could be a writer for them. Although my date cards would probably read a tad different. Like for Dylan’s last night, it’d say: You’re gonna ride on a train all day then have dinner on it. Lets hope she choo-choo chooses you to be a recipient of a rose. Ok, so maybe that was from an episode of the “Simpsons” with Ralph giving Lisa a Valentine’s Day card, but that’s not important right now. What is important is I can write date cards that have more than six words on them and I won’t be nearly as ridiculous. Gimmie the job dammit. Maybe since I know all the dates in advance, I’ll start writing my own date cards before the episode airs and put them in this column every week. Sweet. In two weeks, Josh has a 1-on-1 with a concert in it and Brian has a 1-on-1 that’s a food date. Here are my date card predictions for those 1-on-1’s. Ready?

Josh: “Tongue Me.”
Brian: “Eat Me.”

Bam! Told you I could write for this show. Now, I would try and come up with my own guess for the mime group date, but I actually already know what it says. No joke, the mime date card has nothing on it. Marquel actually guesses it has something to do with mimes since the card is blank. Add that to your list of spoilers.

-Andi and Dylan are taking the Essex Steam Train up the Connecticut river. And since they’re doing that, Andi must throw in a metaphor. Andi: “Dylan and I’s relationship is gonna take a turn today…it might pick up a little steam.” Bhahahahahahahahahahaha. I totally get it. The train. The steam. The…just f***ing stop already. Jesus. Not to go all “Back to the Future 3” on you but, well yes, to go all “Back to the Future 3” on you, is this the same train that Doc Brown came back to 1985 in with Clara Clayton and his two boys? I think it is. Andi and Dylan are actually riding on a train that was invented by Doc Brown in 1885 and can travel through time. Awesome. I think they should travel ahead about 6 hrs on this date and actually eat their food. You’re gonna leave a plate of potatoes, broccoli, and chicken un-eaten? Are you guys even American? How could you possibly let a plate like that go to waste? Eat your food or you can’t watch TV tonight. Both of you. No dessert. Head straight to your room and do your homework. Sorry. Five days with Nicholas will do that to me sometimes.

-Dylan asks Andi to describe her ideal date. She doesn’t really have an answer. “I don’t know…dinner, dessert, and drinks” then I think she said the most common answer strangers give when asked this question in that, “Well, it doesn’t really matter what we do, it matters who we’re with.” It’s like Andi was filling out a profile answering this question. Said her last relationship lasted 3 to 3 ½ years and it just ended because she couldn’t see herself marrying the guy. Or he just had his own opinion on things and it made Andi fly off the handle so she dumped him. Whatevs. Dylan says he had an 8 year relationship that ended, and she ended up getting engaged the day after his brother’s funeral. Ouch. Although he says he’s happy for her, that one definitely had to sting a little. Look, I get people grieve in different ways, but is this really a show Dylan wants to be coming on 5 months after his brother died? He really wants to subject himself to this? Then three months later he’s off to film “Bachelor in Paradise?” Hey, it’s his life, but I just would never want to do something like this so soon to someone passing. I don’t get it.

-We got the Salon Hair Confidential commercial again and they repeated the DeAnna one. Or was it a second commercial they filmed with her? Can’t really say I paid attention to every word out of her mouth, but yeah, probably was a repeat. Filming one of these was bad enough, could you imagine two? The guy doing the girls hair, now, I don’t want to say he could be the meat in a Patrick & Andrew sandwich but, well, he could. And he’d enjoy it immensely. I hope DeAnna, Desiree, and Catherine get a year long supply of Salon Hair products for this, otherwise it wasn’t worth it. I don’t even get the point of it. Because they were on the show they get special treatment for their hair? It’s all too confusing. Anyway, on a separate Catherine note…remember how I said in this last Thursday’s chat that I had not yet received a thank you note from Sean & Catherine for my wedding gift? Guess I had spoken too soon since it arrived last week when I was in CA. It was in my batch of mail I went and got today, so thank you to them.

-After spending all day on the train, guess where Andi and Dylan’s dinner is gonna be? On the train! I mean, it would’ve only made sense to have a private concert by Train, no? I mean sure, they’d be the only group in show’s history to have a repeat performance (Brad’s 1-on-1 with the once Jackie Gordon had a Train performance), but it was only fitting. Then again, if I have to hear “Your lip-stick staaaaaaaaains…” again, I might lose it on someone (sorry to steal your phrase, Andi). Andi knows that Dylan is being a little shy and wants him to come out of his shell. Like now. Andi: “I wanna see the real Dylan sooner rather than later.” Bossy, bossy. But hey, it’s Andi we’re talking about here. This shouldn’t surprise anyone. Dylan tells the story of his sister overdosing on drugs 4 years ago when he was in college, his brother had a hard time with her death, he got into drugs, was in and out of rehab, Dylan got a call from his grandpa one day his brother was in a coma and, you know the rest. He died this past November and their father is nowhere to be found. Dylan clearly earned points with the female audience last night. How could you not? Horrible tragedy. Will make it that much worse when he’s one episode away from hometowns. Although, Dylan does seem a bit reserved. I’m not sure this show is for him at all. “Bachelor in Paradise?” Even more random he chose to do that.

-Andi thinks it was a very big honor that someone opened up to her like that and shared his story so Dylan gets a rose. Well of course he opened up to you like that, you practically brow beat him into it. Look, there was zero chance that Dylan wasn’t gonna get cast on this show with a backstory like that, and there was an even less than zero chance that once he was cast that he wouldn’t tell his story. It’s what this show does. They LOVE stuff like this. And I totally see it on the show’s end. What reality show out there doesn’t pick contestants who have a backstory? They all do. And they all get them to share it at some point and break down and cry. I’ve just never quite understood it from the contestants side as they have no problem telling America personal, intimate details like that. On shows like “Idol” and the “Voice,” where there’s an actual prize at the end and you need the audience’s vote to win? Sure. But on this? I just don’t get it. And 5 months removed from losing his second sibling? To each their own. Dylan seems too normal for this show.

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  1. rob22

    June 3, 2014 at 11:25 AM

    So, they have a guy who dies and decide to go the “honest” route to portray his exit? It may have been honest, but MF doesn’t care about honesty. He’s got a proven track record of over 10 years in that regard. No, he looked at sagging ratings and decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth. That golden egg was teed up for him. All he had to do was hit it. And so he did. Can you imagine MF avoiding the topic and passing on the ratings potential? That just wasn’t going to happen. Sure, he tried to do it tastefully and avoid any backlash for his ratings grab, but there was no need to be mean spirited in this case.

    As for Eric personally I have no opinion. He’s no worse than a lot of people have been on the show and certainly better than quite a few. But we really can’t know him any better than anyone else. I do take some exception to anyone that goes on the show, rolls around in it for 4 weeks, and then suddenly is outraged that the paid lead is acting. Come on. Like I commented in the prior blog, that’s like Captain Renault, from Casablanca, opining “I’m shocked, shocked that there is gambling going on here”. There was no need to be duplicitous. Andi is being paid to put on her makeup, show her girls and pretend to enjoy her dates. She said as much. She’s “working” her tail off (read acting) and is exhausted after four weeks of being the focal point of the show. Are these guys really that drunk and stupid that they don’t know what this show is all about? Hadn’t we already gotten to the point where pretty much everyone was joining the show to pimp their business or get their 15 minutes? Did we suddenly get a batch of guys that fell off the back of the turnip truck?…. Besides Chris, I mean.

  2. gemma86

    June 3, 2014 at 11:27 AM

    This may come off as mean…but…I hope they don’t dwell on Eric much anymore the rest of the season. Its unfortunate and I feel for him and his family but I think we should move on. He was a part of the show, not the show and I want to get back to THE SHOW. Again condolences RIP but I’m ready to move on.

    AS far as MTA I don’t expect much from the guys because they only knew him like what 2 -3 weeks? I think its unfair to them to have to come up with some deep emotional bond that may have or may not have been there. Sure they’ll be sad but I dont think it will be more than the general “he was a great guy”. If anything I think they should just show a video that pays tribute to his life and what he was doing, no need to draw it out anymore than necessary. And I dont need to see Andi and the F4 reaction to his death. We already know they will be upset and shocked, and will cry so please lets just get back to THE SHOW!

    Finally as far as their “argument” I will side with Andi. Obviously her intentions are not to seriously hurt anyones feelings so I get where she felt attacked by being called fake when fro what I’ve seen she does care about the guys and is trying and it is a sensitive predicament to be in. I just think the writing was on the wall with even Andi foreshadowing to there being a “stall” in their relationship. IMO it would have been acting for her to be all gushy gushy if its not there. I think it was a hard pill for Eric to swallow that “Shes just not that into you”. And by dammit she has that right to be 🙂

  3. rob22

    June 3, 2014 at 11:38 AM

    Gemma, do you really think MF is going to pass on the ratings opportunity presented by the filmed responses of the F4 being told of Eric’s death? If you wondered how that was going to be handled, last night was your answer. We’re going to see every moment of every tear shed that day. Cynical, yes. But it’s a cynical show. They’re just not going to pass on an opportunity like this. The Bachelor was getting a little long in the tooth, with a lot of phonies populating recent shows…. And then THIS happens. Oh, they’ll milk this puppy for all it’s worth, while trying not to offend too many people. If there is any backlash, expect the show to respond that they wanted to be honest and true to Eric’s memory, and that editing out the responses would have been dishonest. Like it, or not, the major subplot this season is Eric.

  4. oyoung1117

    June 3, 2014 at 12:12 PM

    As far as the way the show handled it–I think it could have been handled a little better. Mostly, I feel like if Andi had said anything slightly regretful about the argument like “Watching it back I think he was just using the wrong words to describe how he felt and I just misunderstood, because he was a great person and wasn’t trying to offend me” it would have made her part better and seem less like she thinks she can do no wrong which she had just exemplified during the argument itself. And also it would have been nice if they maybe had a producer or guy who had gotten closer to him also on to share what a great guy he was.
    As for the argument–I think he really just wasn’t articulating what he meant very well and she was too tired and just not into him enough to even try to understand what he meant.
    I feel like her whole break down about being so tired was kind of what he meant. She kept saying “How can you say that when I have been working my ass off and trying so hard for you guys?” and I think he sensed that she was trying so hard and that is what he wanted her to stop doing. I think he wanted her to say, “Oh my gosh I am just so tired!” And have a real conversation with her instead of feeling the need to be bright and charming with him.
    So honestly, I really take his side. I can’t stand people who feel the need to fake it and paste on a smile all of the time, but I do recognize that many people prize that quality in themselves so it is just a personal pet peeve. Ashley was a bachelorette who immediately jumps to mind who was a little more “open” with the guys about what she was feeling rather than just keeping up the act all of the time. Also, another reason I take his side is because she kept (even in his memorial interview) saying he wasn’t really opening up to her. I think telling her how he walked away from his faith was pretty open myself. And to be honest, maybe it was edited it out, but she seemed like she listened to his story, digested it, and moved on, rather than starting a deep conversation about it. That’s what being open would have looked like on her side. You know, confession and mirroring? The basis of all deep friendships?
    I don’t really dislike her for the fight though because it probably boiled down to the fact that she wasn’t interested enough in him to make it work.
    But I do blame her for freaking the eff out that he confronted her for having the audacity to criticize her. It just seemed like a spoiled brat thing to do.

  5. angelfish

    June 3, 2014 at 12:43 PM

    All the harping on Eric being a bad communicator is ridiculous. The man went to foreign countries where he DID NOT speak the language and communicated.

    His entire travel epic or odyssey or boondoggle or whatever was about COMMUNICATING! With other people. About their lives. It was all over his photos and blogs and videos.

    His “mission” was to communicate.

    But all of the sudden, with Andi, he was incapable of any coherence? Sorry, just not buying that. She didn’t want him for keeps and it bruised his ego enough to go on the offensive. He’s not bad, she’s not bad but together they would be bad.

    I know what I saw on my TV screen and how I interpret those words & actions.


  6. karynr

    June 3, 2014 at 12:54 PM

    Well put, Angelfish. No one did any wrong.

    Rob, I agree completely. MF, aka the MF, cares about ratings, not people.

    RS has handled this beautifully.

  7. LynnMJ

    June 3, 2014 at 1:04 PM

    Steve, on the topic of air travel and your comment. Maybe the person beside you sighed because he/she wondered why the plane wasn’t ‘fixed’ BEFORE they boarded passengers??….Just sayin’. As far as how the Eric situation was handled, I have one word…..tasteless. And, Steve, I agree 100% regarding Dylan. It’s his choice, but why he’d choose to come on a show like this so soon after tragedy is beyond me.

  8. bigfatwoman

    June 3, 2014 at 1:47 PM

    As for the heavy sighing woman on the plane —there could be a hundred different reasons she was exasperated. Maybe her husband just told her their kid wrecked the car again, she was just fired — the list goes on.

    oyoung….I agree 100% with your view.

    As far as Dylan going on the show, you’d have to ask him his reasons. Everyone deals with obstacles in their own way.

  9. angelfish

    June 3, 2014 at 5:32 PM

    Thanks Karynr,

    I just watched an interview with Eric’s brother,Scott on “Entertainment Tonight”. He was very gracious and said the whole family was fine with how the show went. He also said he’d like to sit down & chat with Andi.

    Chris Harrison did a phone in and said that since Eric’s exit interview was brief & a little tense, they subbed in his little interview with Andi.

    So if the family is fine with what went down, that should be the end of all the huffing & puffing! *LOL*

  10. dulcinea14

    June 3, 2014 at 5:57 PM

    I became a fan of Andi’s when she told JP off for being fake. She wasn’t happy that JP dismissed her feelings. So when Eric approached her with sincerity and kindness and she flipped out, my opinion of her took a nose dive. She absolutely overreacted and didn’t even attempt to listen to what he had to say and take it to heart. She is a hypocritical spoiled brat. The interview at the end? Could she seem any more glib? Screw her.

  11. ashleigh11

    June 4, 2014 at 7:29 AM

    I work in pharma sales and most of the Bachelor/Bachelorette group dates and cocktail parties remind me a lot of the happy, sometimes mindless fakery that is just part of the required social scene. Andi is good at this. Eric is not. Eric has traveled the world and is savvy to the hardships and political struggles in countries where dressing up to drink champagne and have cursory “I so want to find love, this is so great, best day ever, omg, isn’t this hotel amazing!” conversation feels stilted and disingenuous at best.

    After a solid first date, he was probably getting fed up with trying to find a few minutes to re-establish that connection with Andi, only to find her being formal and nice with him and maybe brushing him off or not really opening up to him. I get that this is part of the game, but Eric probably realized he wasn’t cut out for it. He opened up to her on several occasions but all I really heard from Andi was “hmm… interesting.” When he pulled her aside and calmly and rationally explained how he was feeling about her being detached or having a ‘poker face’ or just playing things up for the camera, he had every right to. He wasn’t yelling at her or insulting her. Andi chose to take it that any guy who was not fawning over her and telling her how fabulous she is = an insult. Instead of having a normal conversation about the frustrations of being tired, or just not feeling the right connection or whatever she wanted to say about it – she flew off the handle and went into tears and hysterics and blew everything he was saying wayyyy out of proportion.

    I was watching that scene and just thinking – wow, this girl is sooo high maintenance and cannot *listen* properly. Eric is a good communicator – he tried to be real and tell her how he felt – in the moment. She just didn’t want to hear it and the melodrama that ensued is allll on her, as far as I’m concerned. My feelings have nothing to do with Eric’s tragic accident either. I would have felt the same, even if he was still around. Andi seriously needs to learn some interpersonal skills that go beyond small-talk and social-acting. I thought this during her over-dramatic Juan-Pablo explosion and this was just another (worse) example. She always needs to be right and if the guy doesn’t retract his statements, out come the tears and overblown fury. If Josh ever stops stroking her ego – watch out! So yeah, I was Team Eric all the way. He cut through the BS, trying to see if there was something there and what needed to happen to have a meaningful connection and she just didn’t ‘get it’. It’s like they were having two different conversations. All she heard was “how dare you criticize me!” Ugh. Girl, you did the same to JP. I half-wish, last season that instead of calmly saying “eees ok” – JP had just burst into hysterical sobbing and told her how tired he was and to just get out. On this show (AND last season!) Andi cries about something every 20 minutes – I hope Eric didn’t feel too badly about it. For a lawyer, she doesn’t seem able to hold it together very well.

    Re – the aftermath – I wish they’d just chosen to show maybe 10 min about Eric’s life – maybe some video clips from his travels. I would love to have seen that instead of Andi fake-crying about how she can’t believe he won’t be at Men Tell All. God – this woman needs to stop being so self-involved!

  12. serapa

    June 6, 2014 at 9:54 AM

    Dear Eric’s Sister,

    I wish your family healing from this tragedy. What I saw of Eric was a very sincere person who was very different from Andi. He was well travelled and very street smart. Because of his travels, he had little time for formal “small talk”. It was as simple as that with Andi. He probably wasn’t a good fit for the show b/c of his sincere nature.

    I am sad for your loss…Prayers to your family,


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