Reality Steve

The Bachelorette 10 - Andi

Reader Email Reaction to How ABC Handled Monday Night’s Episode

As uncomfortable as it was to watch, I believe they did justice to Eric’s memory in showing the whole conversation then cutting to Andi and Chris talking about him rather than a rose ceremony. I couldn’t agree with you more, in that this was but a small portion of time in Eric’s life, in the grand scheme of things, and doesn’t define him as a person.

Although totally agreeing Andi blew their argument way out of proportion, she admitted that she just get caught up in the little details of the show and lost sight of reality for the short time the show was being filmed. This is their world for that period of time; however, neither of their actions or words were horrible. They disagreed, they discussed (heatedly) their disagreement, then went on about their business. I don’t believe for one minute, that if she had any foresight into Eric’s death on that night, she wouldn’t have changed her words or behavior. Unfortunately, we don’t get that in life. Still, the argument wasn’t a huge deal either way and didn’t change my opinion about either of them.

I agree with you that the show handled as best they could. No matter how they handled it, someone would have been upset. From the stand point of watching the show, it is sort of a relief that he went home last night because it was hard to watch without feeling a bit of awkwardness and sadness over the whole thing. If he’d stayed might things have gone differently for him? Who knows? That question is futile. But to go as far as to blame her for his death is just asinine. He had experienced more life than most of us, he lived his dreams. It’s time for him to rest in peace.

Comment: I have zero respect for nameless faceless people on the internet who troll around on social media just for the fun of it. Losers.
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Steve,

Thank you for linking “Today” article from Eric’s sister, Karen. I was bawling reading it, and I am heartbroken for Karen and the rest of his family.

I also agree with Karen that you have covered his death and Bachelorette experience very respectfully. As you said, it’s important to remember there was a lot more to his life – and to anyone’s life than their time on a silly tv show.

(Except maybe Chris Bukowski – I have a feeling his time on Bachelorette/Bachelor Pad encapsulates him pretty well.)

I actually think the producers did a nice job covering Eric. I wasn’t expecting the Chris Harrison/Andi sit down last night, but I thought it was a respectful thing to do. It would have been strange to bid adieu to Eric and then focus on Tasos leaving. For a show that usually takes the low road, I have to give them kudos.

I don’t think there was any way they could not have shown his exit – and I don’t think his exit really reflected negatively on him anyway. He was a little confrontational with Andi, but her reaction did seem disproportionate. Of course there’s some acting involved in this show (in her defense). But in his defense, for her to say he wasn’t opening up or telling her about himself seemed crazy. We saw him open up more than any other contestant, and far earlier. Clearly they weren’t compatible, but I didn’t understand her beef with him.

Hopefully Andi still has the dolls Eric gave her. I think she should send them to his sister.
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Hi Steve,

First, I’ve been a fan of yours since WAY before you started spoiling. I’ve never written before, and like you, don’t take this show or anyone’s comments so seriously that I allow it to affect my life. However, today I’m in a writing mood and feel like responding to a few things I’ve noticed. Overall, I realize how highly edited reality television is, as I have a son who is in the business (has editing and cinematography credits on many films, was Director of Technology at the 3rd largest Post Production Co. in the country, and is currently employed by a major world news station…yes, I’m a proud mom…shoot me!) So, yeah, he helps keep my head out of the clouds regarding this business.

In a conversation shown that Eric had with Andi after his 1-on-1 date, he said (not an exact quote), “Wow. I didn’t realize there would be so many days where I didn’t see you from our first date to the next.” It’s very possible Eric didn’t really have a grasp on the minimal amount of time the men actually have with the lead. This seems to be a surprise to many of the participants of this show, after the fact.

From what we were allowed to observe, Eric definitely seemed to open up to Andi more than what she has done so far with ANY of the bachelors, unless you count making out as “opening up”. She definitely misspoke in that regard. Currently in the show, none of the men have been more real (and honest) in talking about their life than Eric. While she does seem to try to be courteous and an attentive listener to all the men, she is obviously drawn to basic superficial attraction and seems to count that as “a connection” (as she did with Juan Pablo in the beginning). I did think she displayed rudeness when the flowers came (obvious set-up…what delivery person is allowed to walk on set during filming?). The polite thing to do would have been to ask if the flowers were from him, and if not, read the letter/card following her conversation with Eric. Was it that hard to wait or a set-up “acting” opportunity? It was obviously manipulated producer drama, but it didn’t interrupt Eric’s conversation when he first lightly broached the subject.

In their final conversation, Eric maintained a respectful tone in the conversation and seemed concerned when she got upset. He definitely, but I don’t think intentionally, triggered a sensitive spot with Andi, and asked to resume talking about it later. We may not have seen the entire interlude, but Andi seemed to overreact and became very defensive to his confronting her over what seemed to be semantics.

In the end, what I know about Eric is he was a remarkable young man with a driven purpose. I’ve read from those who knew him, that he was not the reckless “thrill” seeker so much as he took calculated, thought-out risks. Many commenters have bashed him for this, but I don’t understand why as it has nothing to do with this show. He didn’t need this show to seek traveling opportunities. He was doing just fine on his own. He wanted to understand and communicate with people in all walks of life. What I know of Andi’s life, at this point, is she was one of the “Most Eligible Bachelorettes in Atlanta” (did she already have PR representation to get this magazine spread?), was a lawyer but is no longer invested at this point, professed modesty last season and now dresses at the opposite spectrum, likes to make-out with “hot” guys devoid of deep conversation, and has been a puppet of the producer’s (seemingly) since the middle of JP’s season. I think Eric was observant in seeing the contradiction she portrayed from one moment to the next. Andi had several guys already worshipping the ground she walked on professing their love for her…she didn’t want or need the confrontation. May Eric’s spirit continue through his foundation and may he rest in peace. May Andi find everything in life she dreams of and hopes for.

Comment: Very good, well thought out email.
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Dear Steve,

I’ll start off by saying that I agreed with what Eric said to Andi. He did share more with her than most other guys, but since he didn’t make out with her like a horny teenager like other guys did Andi thought he was “holding back”. He was then refreshingly honest and that never bodes well on this show. He tried to have an honest conversation with her and she flipped out, a little dose of of Eric’s reality in this “reality” show did not compute.

I believe that they didn’t show the last part of the episode because I imagine the majority of the footage was the guys and Andi ripping on Eric because of what he said and how he left. The show couldn’t figure out a way to cut it together that would make sense and couldn’t show the uncut footage without looking like total douchebags. They needed to replace the footage with something and came up with the sit down. I also believe that everything they did last night was purely to make the show “look” like it had a heart and had nothing whatsoever to do with honoring Eric.

I thought Andi came off in that interview as self-centered and insincere. Eric’s family and friends have lost him, someone so important to them, and she’s talking about not seeing him at the Men Tell All?! WTF. It sounded so ridiculous. They had no business discussing him, they didn’t know him on a deep level and it wasn’t their place to talk about his loss. I would have been much happier with a slideshow of pictures or videos from his travels, or a tribute from people who truly knew him. Heck, I would have rather looked at a black screen that said In Memoriam with his name for fifteen minutes instead of having to look at and listen to Chris Harrison and Andi. I almost feel like the show was planning to run the full episode and decided to back out at the last minute and had to throw something together so they just thought, hey, why not have Chris and Andi make it look like the Bachelor franchise actually gives a damn.

Although I didn’t know Eric, I was so touched by his story and his passing. I was brought to tears last night after hearing his words about family and love, about a future that wasn’t going to happen for him. And then to follow that moment up with a “tribute” to him that was anything but a tribute was upsetting. I wasn’t expecting much from a show that seems to sink to new levels each year, but I guess I was hoping for better.

I’ll admit, I liked Andi going into this season, but I really can’t stand her now. I think Eric was right about her. And I’m glad he left the show on his own accord instead of at some stupid rose ceremony, he was too good for her and way too good for this show.

Comment: Told you this would be a lightning rod topic. All of us watched the same two hour show last night, and look at how different people view the same two hours completely differently.
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Hi Reality Steve-

After reading your column the past few days I had mixed emotions about the passing of Eric Hill and how ABC would portray it. I usually don’t even get around to watching my DVR until days after the show aired, but was anxious to see how this played out. I have to admit I was pleasantly surprised. I am very happy that ABC chose to share the entire conversation- it made me admire Eric that much more. Sure, maybe he didn’t pick out the perfect words, but Kudos to him for being honest and expressing his thoughts. In a show that thrives on melodrama and forcing a connection, Eric was true to himself. It was obvious he did not bear Andi ill will and is a genuinely nice person. Someone like Eric could never work on The Bachelorette- he’s too real, too wordly, bigger than all of this petty silliness. His goodbye made me want to know him that much more. At first I was critical of Andi blowing up at him for not kissing her butt, but then I realized how much emotional stress goes into being the Bachelorette. It has got to be exhausting separating the good guys from the bad and deciding who to send home. In her world, this is real and she doesn’t want to hurt people’s feelings. I have to give her credit for trying to get to know each guy and keeping an open mind, which I’m guessing Eric perceived as aloofness. Her outburst was understandable. Eric’s family should be very proud of who is was as a person and how he carried himself. Hopefully we will get to know Eric better at the Women Tell All.

P.S. And Andi may not be an actress, but the use of “y’all” is starting to sound very forced if you ask me. I live in the South and we don’t talk like that on a daily basis.
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Hi Steve,

I was glad they showed all of Eric’s last conversation with Andi. It made me think that maybe he didn’t realize how this show works. (For example, he thought it would be more informal, etc). It also made me wonder why he decided to do the show at all. Any insight? I definitely think he was on the show initially to promote his Global Odyssey. Don’t think there was any secret in that. A lot of people come on to promote themselves. Some just do it in different ways than others.

Also, I think deciding whether or not to show the footage of when Andi and the final four guys are told about Eric’s death will be tricky. I don’t think they should show the actual footage of them being told the news. That seems exploitative. Maybe Chris Harrison can just come on screen and tell the audience that Andi and the final four guys were told about the news, which will explain why the mood among Andi and the guys will take on a different tone.

Comment: I don’t see them being told the news of Eric’s death as exploitative at all. Could also give a better sense of where Andi’s head was at and maybe explains future actions of hers. I don’t know. But I don’t see a downside to it.
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Hi Steve,

I’ve been a huge fan of your blog for quite awhile, and I felt the need to express to how much I feel that you’ve handled this whole situation with Eric very maturely and sincerely. For that, I respect you more than I ever thought possible.

Anyway, I feel that ABC absolutely did the right thing in regard to his exit from the show. So here are my thoughts on the situation.

I don’t think Andi deserves all the hate she’s been getting bombarded with. She might have blew his confrontation out of proportion a little bit, but honestly, both her and Eric could have expressed themselves a bit better. Like you said, had this tragedy not happened to Eric after his time on the show, people most likely wouldn’t be so hard on Andi as they are now. Regardless of what went down between them on the show, and whats happened since his exit, doesn’t make either of them bad people. Eric expressed to her what he felt, and instead of trying to change his feelings, Andi thought it’d be best for him to go home…little did she know, he would literally be “sent home” a few weeks after. They just weren’t meant to be. What happened to him after wasn’t Andi’s fault and I highly doubt she ever wished him dead at any point, so I don’t know why people are being so harsh. What kills me is that we will never get to hear Eric’s side of the story in more detail at the MTA.

I’m absolutely still a fan of Andi, and I hope Eric isn’t just remembered as the guy on “The Bachelorette” who got into a fight with Andi, get sent home, and passes away a few weeks later. He was a guy who lived his life to the absolute fullest each day. Just from seeing him on his short journey on this show, he’s inspired me, as well as many others I’m sure, to live life to the fullest. May he RIP.
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Hey Steve,

I just wanted to share my thoughts on Eric’s exit and what we saw last night. First, I want to say that I agree with Eric’s sister and you have handled this with sensitivity and respect. I am sure his family appreciates that.

I don’t blame Eric or Andi for anything. I think it was an unfortunate misunderstanding. We all know that this show is not realistic. For whatever reason, Eric was not prepared for that. On the other hand, Andi is the lead of this show for the entire season. She can’t make it obvious who she want to choose right away because then there wouldn’t be a show. She has no choice but to sort of lead some of the men on until they are ready to be sent home. I pretty much agree with everything you said in your column. I noticed that some are not able to separate the death of Eric and Eric as a contestant which is why Andi is getting heat over it. I think TPTB did the best they could in that situation. It wouldn’t make sense to many of the unspoiled viewers to edit Eric and Andi’s conversation to leave all the negative stuff out. I think it would have left so many questions. I do feel bad for the family if they were watching last night. I think that it would be too much for the family to see this early in their grieving process.
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Hi Reality Steve,

In the grand scheme of things, I don’t give a flying f**k how the Eric situation was handled, but since you asked…

I think it was fine to show the argument between him and Andi. I think they both had their points but I seemed to side with Andi.

I wasn’t a huge fan of the end talk with Harrison and Andi. It somehow seemed disingenuous to me, or like they were doing it because they had to. I guess I would have preferred some footage of Eric, maybe bloopers or other positive scenes with the other guys. That would have made it more about Eric’s memory than about Andi and the show.

Anyway, thanks for the recaps. They were awesome as usual!
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Steve, love your site! My ‘bachelor experience’ wouldn’t be the same without it.

I’ve been reading your site ever since the Jason/Molly season but this is my first time writing in. Eric’s story really touched me. In my opinion he’s one of the best (if not the best) contestants they ever had on the show. Truly a man that’s a whole package. Though I don’t feel as if the show handled the situation with particular care and respect for him and his family, I don’t think they did a terrible job either. Eric was a standup guy and handled himself with class the entire time he was on the show. The final scene with him and Andi, he impressed me, more than anything else. He spoke up, called her out on essentially being fake and I respect him more for it. Andi didn’t deserve an ounce of Eric and the only person that handled that situation badly was Andi. She in turn made herself look extremely immature, rude, dramatic and hypocritical. For someone whose always asking the guys to be honest, she certainly can’t handle any criticism. Even though she comes of very confident she must be very insecure, as soon as anyone disagrees with her she completely looses it. That girl has a temper and is probably horrible in relationships. Good thing that Josh seems to have an IQ of a rabbit, as long as he keeps telling her how amazing she is and never disagrees with her that relationship should work out dandy. Having said all that, I do find her to be a good bachelorette as in she’s fun to watch. In my opinion this has been one of the better seasons, so kudos to her.

Thanks for doing what you do, def brings some entertainment to my day.

RIP Eric. The world lost a good one.
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Hi Steve,

I have been with you since day one and as pathetic as it is I don’t think I have missed an episode of The Bachelor. You have made watching the show bearable. Thank you.

I totally agree with your take on the how the show handled the tragedy of Eric’s death. I was hoping you wouldn’t blast Chris Harrison or the show because I felt they handled it as you so eloquently stated,”as best they could.” I cried when Chris was talking to Andi. I felt Eric’s untimely death was handled very well , with compassion and dignity.So sad.

Keep on doing your thing , Steve. Love your witty insights and humor.
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I think the show handled his exit okay. They showed what really happened and that was the right thing to do. I also think not showing the rose ceremony was fine. However, I would have preferred some of the conversation time between Andi and Chris to be devoted to a video memorial to Eric and his life. As you said, this show was a two week blip in his life yet they focused on Andi’s reaction when she barely knew him and was not really a part of his life. They should have focused on Eric and maybe showed some pictures and/or quick videos of family and friends talking about him. I lost my 24 year old son in a boating accident and I try to think if it had been him on the show, how would I have wanted it handled. I keep coming back to that the show didn’t define him, so if you’re going to honor his memory do it with the people who really loved him and not just within the context of the show and Andi’s take on it.

As to their conversation, I think Eric was naive about the show. It’s so far removed from being a real person when there are cameras in your face everywhere and you’re sealed from the world with a ton of guys competing for only you. Andi has to act, but Eric’s heart was in the right place. He was well traveled, but not savvy as to how this show works….a kind soul who wasn’t cut out for this show.
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Hi, Reality Steve,

First, I’d like to express my sincere sympathy to all of Eric’s family and friends.
What a great loss, that came way, way too soon.

Next, I’d like to say what an exemplary job you’ve done, Steve, of honoring Eric
in your columns every single time you would mention him. It must be so gratifying
to have received that email from Eric’s sister. You handled the situation with class,
always pointing your readers to the fact that there was much, much more to Eric
than being a contestant on a dating show for a couple of weeks. Well done.

I honestly agree with everything you said in regard to how the show handled Eric’s
death. They did the best one could expect, especially considering the fact that this
is a reality show, and we all make fun of this show all the time. So, when they handle
a difficult real-life situation this well, one should give credit where credit is due, (which
you’ve done, RS.)

I think it was appropriate to cut out the rose ceremony and have Chris and Andi
talk about Eric. While I was watching, I did wonder if they would have some of the
guys share their thoughts about Eric, but in hindsight, I feel certain that they’ll do that
during the MTA show.

Most importantly, it is entirely possible that ABC got approval (the “blessing,” so to speak) of everything that aired in regard to Eric. If that’s the case, then it really doesn’t matter
what any of us think. If Eric’s family approved, then it’s a FACT that ABC handled it
well.

Regarding Eric and Andi’s conversation when he left….for anyone who was upset about
how Andi reacted to Eric last night, you have to remember that we all watched that episode knowing that Eric had died a few weeks later. That fact alone makes us more sensitive, and more critical, of anything remotely negative that Andi or even any of the guys, would say to Eric. (My heart was in my throat anytime Eric was on screen and
especially anytime he spoke, so I know it affected me.)

Did Andi kinda overreact to what Eric said? I think one could say yes. But you have to remember, when you’re the lead on this show, you could easily be very tired, you have to keep a lot of your feelings to yourself, watch what you say, try to give everyone equal time, try to get to know all these people as much as possible, try to make good decisions, etc.

Andi may not be perfect, and she’s not my all-time favorite “Bachelorette,” but she does appear to be trying her best in every episode that’s aired up to now.

So maybe when Eric said he didn’t come there to meet a “TV actress,” and that he thought Andi wasn’t maybe being totally open herself, you can see where that might be upsetting to hear. Maybe there was a more perfect, mature way to handle what Eric said to her, but I think her reaction was pretty human, and definitely understandable, even though I don’t
think Eric meant it exactly the way Andi took it.

OK, long enough. Thanks for all you do, Steve.
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Steve-

I have to agree with Karen-you’ve handled the whole situation with Eric
and the show with so much class and sensitivity. Everything you’ve said
about Eric and your reactions to how he left the show are dead on. I
agree with you on every point! I can tell you that my sister and
brother-in-law (Eric’s brother Brian) have been watching the show. They
are happy to see Eric and to have that documentation of him-but think
the show is totally ridiculous. 😉 Eric’s time on the show ended
exactly when it should have. After he left, he had time to spend at home
with his parents and my sister and nieces for 8 days-no interruptions,
just good quality time. Anyway, it’s been interesting watching the
show and reading your comments. I don’t know if I’ll watch the rest of
the season, but anyway-thanks again for your great commentary on Eric
and his life.

Comment: Good to know. Thank you.
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Hi Steve,

I really enjoy your site and following you on Twitter. I wanted to give my thoughts on how they’ve handled the Eric Hill situation. I do think you’re right in saying they had to show the whole scenario that happened concerning his departure from the show. I think not only was it important for his story, I think that for Andi’s journey on the show it was probably a huge part. The only other way they could’ve done it was for him to suddenly be gone and that wouldn’t have made sense if he was there on the basketball date then never seen again. I thought he came across as extremely honest even if he obviously didn’t know how the show worked, I think Andi might have overreacted and should’ve probably just explained to him that is how the show works and if she were to tell people she wasn’t feeling it or how much she is feeling it right when she knew there wouldn’t be a show. I think had he not confronted her he would’ve been on longer but I’m sure there was more to it and it was obvious to both it wasn’t happening for them; I liked he was up front and open with her because it showed his character. I, like you, did not understand that Andi said he was not open with her, he seemed to share a lot of really deep stuff that people don’t normally share on this show (or maybe they do and it isn’t always shown, but was for Eric because of the circumstances).

I did not like the interview with Andi, I thought it was more to make her look better for getting upset with him (even if it was warranted, that was the last scene with him and her so they seemed like they felt she had to explain herself) than to honor Eric just based on some of the questions Chris Harrison asked. At that point, it didn’t matter why he and Andi didn’t work, all that mattered was the kind of person he was and good memories they had of him, Andi has been much more focused on doing just that on her People blog and Instagram. I would’ve much preferred a video of some of the guys, Andi, and producers and crew of the show sharing short messages of fond memories with him and messages of support to his family and maybe a montage of scenes with him that would bring a smile to his family’s faces, since many have spoken positively about him since his passing. I hope you’re right and they will do something of the sort for Men Tell All. I loved the letter from his sister to you, she seems as kind as he seemed. I agree with you, this show is nothing in the big scheme of the life he lived. He truly seemed like a great person and I hope his family can find peace in knowing his life was so full. I enjoyed watching him on the show and he was really intriguing to me from the time you released the information on the contestants.

Keep up the good work and may Eric RIP!

PS-Are you following Nick’s brothers on Twitter? If so, what do you think of the comments James made about Eric last night? I thought it was extremely tasteless and inappropriate but was curious about what you thought. (specifically the one about they don’t send limos for lame-o’s or something like that then he put #taxis), he has since deleted that tweet. (@jviall) Did not see what he wrote.
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I think Eric Hill is a class act. He called this show out for what it was, and I believe he was a compete gentleman about it. I don’t think it painted him in a negative light nor should we lament that it was his ‘final act’. I think he handled himself so well. He was articulate, honest and he took a risk at being real on a reality show. I thought it was awesome. It showed who he was. He didn’t stand for BS and he was invested enough to try to get somewhere with Andy. Well done. As far as Andy’s reaction, totally understandable. She was hurt because she really was trying to be ‘every woman’. I think her reaction was justifiable. As much as emotions were high, I think they ended it well. Eric even had the opportunity to utter an ‘I’m sorry’ before he left. He explained himself in his ITM and it all made perfect sense to me. As far as people going crazy on Andy—any other Bachelor or Bachelorette in the 20+ seasons this show has been filmed, could have been in the EXACT same place if a death had occurred with a contestant that left in some sort of huff. She’s just the unfortunate recipient of such a position.

I think the Bachelor franchise handled this situation well. It is probably one of the classier things (are they any classy things?) they have done over the years. They showed who Eric was and it was all good. He was real, he was human, and they showed all of that. No editing needed. He was what he was. A sweet, kind, thoughtful, caring, human being who did a lot of good with the short time he had on this earth. I am thankful to have heard his story, one we would have never heard without the Bachelor series. Cheers to Eric Hill.
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Thank you for the logical, well written opinion on things- I completely agree.

What I also saw early on was Andi starting to appear “put off” that Eric was getting to be so heavy and high maintenance. No girl wants that from a guy she has only seen a few times in the real world dating scenario.

I think he just kept pushing and pushing his point and it just got annoying; he had an agenda and was determined not to detour.
I would have been completely turned off with that approach.

I am enjoying her more than almost any other bachelorettes- she has spunk and is giving it her best.

Folks are just nutso thinking her letting him go contributed to his death. If he had made it through that conversation; he ‘d have driven her crazy the next week and all the viewers as well with that focused behavior.

RIP Eric, it was a blessing to learn of your adventures and life experiences. God Bless your family and all those who love you.
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Regarding Eric’s exit from the show last night, I didn’t think he was being confrontational at all. I thought it was very reasonable for him to say that he thought she was not being open with him even though she was asking him to be open with her. To the extent that he was actually trying to get to know her with the intent of forming a real relationship, this was an appropriate thing to say. He certainly didn’t seem overly aggressive or angry or anything to me. I didn’t think it was a situation in which “he made her cry.” I think he just said something that happened to upset her, which happens.

Obviously, the format of the show dictates that Andi can’t be as open with the guys as they are with her. Otherwise, she would just say who she likes and doesn’t in the first few episodes, and the show wouldn’t stretch to a full season. While in real life she might have been upfront with Eric that she didn’t feel much of a romantic connection with him, the show’s format forces her to be more cagey. She was a little over the top in her reaction, but surely some of that had to be for dramatic effect; right? I did think she was pretty honest with him in saying that of course she wasn’t always able to be completely natural with cameras everywhere.

All in all, I thought the conversation didn’t really make either of them look bad. Andi overreacted a little, but that’s the worst I could say.

The impression I got about Eric from the show was completely positive. He seemed smart, interesting, adventurous, and sincere. Such a huge loss, but at least it seemed like he made the most of the time he had.
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Hi Steve,

I thought the show was really well done as far as Eric’s last show. It was very sad, and quite a different way for him to leave the show. But I think it showed what a ‘real’ person he really was; he felt he definitely had opened up to Andi, but also knew she wasn’t. He didn’t know how she ‘opened up’ to Marcus, Josh, or Nick, but we know she did. Considering it was a lot of making out and not so much in the deep conversation area! But all we usually see every season, is 25 contestants, all basically wanting to ‘win the prize’ (maybe more so the materialistic prize of fame, and not always necessarily the prize of a fiance). So it was refreshing that Eric looked past the fancy dates and hotels, and wanted more than that in a wife. Which also showed he WAS probably seriously there for the right reason. Even if it’s too soon for them to watch it, someday hopefully they will, and when they do, I hope the episode can give them a tiny bit of comfort, knowing he was a sincere guy.
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Considering this type of situation has never occurred in the Bachelor franchise, I think it was handled well. However, that’s only based on what I was able to see from last night. There are so many more hours of film, that I’m sure there were un-aired ITMs with him expressing his doubt. When he confronted Andi, to me, it seemed a little out of the blue; especially after he seemed to be mildly appeased the night before. I think that if I was the editor, I probably would have included a bit more of him talking about his doubts. I agree with this. I’m sure Eric voiced how he felt about Andi in ITM’s in episodes 2 and 3 that were never shown.

I found it amusing/ironic that after being told she seemed fake we cut to Andi and Chris Harrison being nothing but. I get that this is a TV show and she is absolutely calculating her actions but it seemed too canned; too scripted. What really shaped this opinion was actually the end of the conversation. They didn’t air the cocktail party, however immediately following this poignant interview showed clips from the next episode? It felt contrived (forgive me for going so Sharleen on you). I just imagined they’d show a picture of Eric at the end of the interview, play some In Remembrance music and compartmentalize what happened.

I agree that they had to show the argument/confrontation. I just think they should have shown a little more of Eric’s doubts prior; something they’ve done on EVERY other season (Sharleen, Andi, Brooks, etc.).

I think that that they’re going to have to show when Andi and the four remaining guys were told of Eric’s passing. Knowing the emotional and mental manipulation this show builds its foundation upon, it truly would have played a role in decisions. Like on Emily’s season when she learned Arie was in a relationship with her “handler” they didn’t show the conversation, but rather the response and how that factored into the decision-making process. Either way, they have to show the reaction for everyone, that is, they can’t just isolate to Andi as it would make all of the guys appear insensitive. Good call. Them telling Emily on camera that her producer used to date Arie back in the day to get a response is what people wanted to see. And they couldn’t avoid it because the spoiler was out there.
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Hi Steve,

Happy belated birthday. You have been doing a fabulous job this season and it is obviously showing by the responses you have been receiving.
I did not want to over analyze what happened during the conversation. We all know this is a “show” whether you are looking for love, a career or new found fame.
Yes, no one can take anything away from Eric, he was an amazing human being and he was loved and will be missed by many. However, I kind of felt bad for Andi.
She has been doing a good job as the bachelorette, and I felt she has been fair to all of the guys. I do not believe the words Eric used were fair to her and that made her agitated. The two of them together were not good communicators and I got the impression Andi felt hurt and blindsided. If someone used the word “poker face” to me, yeah I would have gone a little postal.

The one thing I want to add is that if I was in Andi’s shoes there would not be a day that goes by where I would not think of Eric in some way. I would probably run it in my head a million times on how this could have ended up differently so I could have saved him somehow. The situation is horrible and yes, Andi will never be able to have that conversation with Eric where they can hash things out and have closure. I am sorry it ended this way for both of them. I hope the trolls lay off of Andi, this was no way her fault. Unfortunately, we live in a world where people are extremely cruel, especially behind a keyboard. Eric’s sister is such a classy later. Have a good night Steve.
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Steve –

First of all, thank you for your comments on Eric. You showed a lot of heart and I agree with everything you said. I find it ironic that what Eric said to Andi is exactly what makes this show so unreal. His comments about enjoying seeing the real Andi and not the actress and even the comment about her ‘poker face’ just shows how perceptive he was. I wonder how guilty some of the bachelors/bachelorettes feel about having to play this role, when it is obvious that some of them are pretty sure from the beginning who they will choose. I wonder if Eric had ever watched the show and if he hadn’t did he realize that Andi was probably encouraged to act the way she did. It is so obvious that Eric’s definition of ‘reality’ was so much different that ours. He had seen real drama and had heard stories that truely came from the heart. He didn’t belong on this show.

In regard to the conversation between Chris and Andi, of course they couldn’t ask her about the argument. What was she supposed to say – ‘I had to act that way. I couldn’t show partiality.’ I don’t think they were meant for each other anyway, but it was a shame that it ended the way it did between them. My heart goes out to his family and friends. I applaud what he did in life and also the way he expressed his feelings on the show. I don’t think he ever meant to hurt her as all he wanted to do was get to know the real Andi.
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Hey Steve,

I think the show did an OK but clunky job of handling Eric’s departure from the show. The first episode, Chris H. explained how this season is dedicated to Eric. Then to follow up after his departure was also a good gesture.

I can definitely see how some people would think that showing the whole argument between Eric and Andi wasn’t in good taste. But on the other hand, that’s what happened, and neither was shown in that bad of a light. Eric was right to not shy away from expressing how he felt; in my opinion he just should have chosen a different, softer way to get his point across. He called Andi a tv actress with a poker face. What he was saying came across like he was blaming/attacking her. So her reaction was understandable.

It was definitely necessary for the show/Chris H. to say something to the viewers in light of having just shown that whole scene. What I would have liked to have seen differently though: keep the rose ceremony in, either this episode (edit some earlier part of show in order to have time for it) or the next episode. If I were Tasos I’d feel like I didn’t get to say my piece like the other guys do when they’re eliminated. Chris H. basically just saying “oh yeah and Tasos didn’t get a rose” sounds like an afterthought and not fair to him. I don’t see what’s insensitive about showing the rose ceremony so long as there is some follow up about Eric’s departure as well.
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I agree with you that there is no “right” way to handle Eric’s departure on The Bachelor. In general I could totally understand why Eric was feeling that way. I could also understand why Andi responded the way she did. I imagine knowing what you are signing up for on The Bachelor and then having to live to be greatly contrasting. This is not said to make excuses, but for me to try to lend a little understanding to how emotional Andi was. I do trust that she is trying very hard and that her position of getting to know so many people to very difficult. It could also explain why a lead might be so guarded. When I finally had to tell my someday husband my backstory it wasn’t a super easy conversation and, in retrospect, I am glad I didn’t have to do it a dozen times in the period of a month or two.

The only thing I was a little disappointed about was how they portrayed some of the guys’ reactions to the heated discussion. I can see the editors not wanting to be disingenuous to the moment, but I also think it was in poor taste to show the guys getting upset with Eric about it. Particularly in the instance of, I think, Josh who made some kind of comment about Eric making Andi cry. I hardly doubt on this show that a contestant would intentionally make someone cry and to show another cast member accusing someone, particularly Eric since we know his story fully, of making her cry.

It is minor in the bigger picture, but it was the one thing I would have liked to have done differently in editing. Also, I would have loved to see some of the guys he was chummy with on the show in the after interview as well. I am sure they knew him better than Andi and it would have been great to see them celebrate him and not just mourn a last conversation.

I agree very much with Eric’s sister that you have done an absolutely wonderful job covering this part of the season! Kudos!

Peace.
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Send all links and emails to: steve@realitysteve.com. To follow me on Twitter, it’s: www.twitter.com/RealitySteve. Instagram name is “RealitySteve,” or join my Reality Steve Facebook Fan Page. Talk to you tomorrow.

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7 Comments

7 Comments

  1. bigfatwoman

    June 4, 2014 at 8:14 AM

    Wowza. Lots of opinions. I read most of them and come away with the basic impression that everyone loves Eric, most people think Andi overreacted to their argument and everyone is divided on how ABC handled the last 10 minutes of Eric’s final show.

    I’m not really sure how I feel about Andi. I will say that her argument with Eric and her follow-up interview has made me question whether there is a coldness to her. She sometimes comes off as rather detached and a bit aloof. Unless they start showing Josh in a better light, he comes off as arrogant and just another pretty face — so I don’t think Andi’s choice reflects too well on her. I think Nick’s airplane thoughts on Josh were probably right on the money.

    Andi and Josh will go down as another Bach couple that doesn’t interest me. The only couple that I truly like that has come out of this franchise is Ashley and JP. Hands down the most real, normal and grounded. Love them.

  2. realdeal

    June 4, 2014 at 10:04 AM

    Andi is going for pure physical attraction, and Josh is “her type”. Josh doesn’t seem to have much substance compared to some of the other guys, but she’s already made up her mind of who she wants after the first episode and no guy has a shot.

    The cameras can’t hide that she’s not giving any of the other guys much of a chance. Eric called her out and she got flustered and upset. She’s got to have a final four and Marcus, Chris, and Nick fill those 3 slots.

    It’s clear who the front runners is and it’s Josh without a doubt. It makes you wonder if Josh and Andi were introduced and knew each other as acquaintenances before the show.

    How do Patrick and Andrew keep getting a rose as of Episode 4 when she seems to show no interest in either of them?

  3. realdeal

    June 4, 2014 at 10:31 AM

    As for Eric’s exit. I am glad they showed Eric and Andi’s conversation. It gave more of an insight to the person that Eric is and made the audience respect an honest guy who stood up for what he believed in and wasn’t afraid have an open dialogue about it. He left the show with dignity and said he wanted to find love and love leads to family which was sad to watch.

    During the post-interview, Andi kept avoiding and side-stepping the real issue at hand. It seemed like she was more concerned about the potential fallout and damage to her reputation in the fans and media’s eyes. She was sad but there wasn’t anything she said that was too convincing. Andi is in hard spot and do feel for her. But a more appropriate tribute would have been for the guys to reflect and talk about Eric and getting to know him because they spent more time with him than Andi did.

  4. rob22

    June 4, 2014 at 11:02 AM

    I was starting to like Andi better this last episode. She wasn’t as dim witted and boring as Desiree and not insecure and clingy like Ashley. She seemed brighter, more interesting and engaging. Basically, I was falling for the act Andi was putting on, which Eric brought to light. No, she’s not really “that way”, she’s just working her tail off, and acting, to put on a good show for the cameras. The JJ date really showed that. They pulled in the goofiest guy to rip off Jacka**: Bad Grandpa with Andi. Why? Because Andi liked him? No, because JJ was the best Johnny Knoxville stand in that they had. She gave him the rose for his performance, but he’ll soon be gone. Just like with Eric, she has no real interest in him.

    Bottom line, she’s a lawyer. We can’t expect any real integrity from her. She picked Josh, and will cash in on DWTS and maybe a televised wedding and all the appearances. I wonder if the show will start televising the inevitable divorces that will occur once the gravy train stops rolling. Shades of the Jake / Vienna meltdown. TV Ratings Gold. MF will be all over that.

  5. serapa

    June 6, 2014 at 12:03 PM

    People are blaming Andi for Eric’s death??? REALLY???? REALLY???

    FOR REAL???

    Man, I’m glad I’m a busy mother of 2 young kids…have no time to read about idiots posting on media.

  6. serapa

    June 6, 2014 at 12:04 PM

    Rob22,

    I don’t see a lot of divorces coming from this show b/c the ppl that are married are staying the heck away from L.A. They are living humble lives near their families. They seem like pretty normal people.

  7. kimieaw

    June 8, 2014 at 12:31 AM

    Yes, I believe that Andi’s actions toward Eric contributed to his accident. He was distracted, his work requires total concentration and mindset. Eric Hill was already in a Reality Show of his own, so his image was very important to him. I believe he was concerned about the bachlorette show airing the footage of his last night. He was humiliated by her on his last night and he was just trying to communicate to her. He didn’t even get to say goodbye to anyone. Andy led him on and then perhaps because of her concerns about his career gave him the cold shoulder after their wonderful first date and after him discussing his career. She has to carry this with her, I don’t care how she tries to justify herself or cope, she needs to own her part. If things don’t go Andi’s way its the highway. I don’t see anyone would want her on their law team or DA team she is very immature. Andi take constructive criticism, NO. My daughter has a friend that was in law school with Andi and said she was self centered and stuck up before the show aired. I liked Andi and wanted to give her the benefit of a doubt, but NOW after the way she treated Eric, she needs to be made accountable for her part in his death. Now, I am Anti-Andi. Also, I am sure that the real reason the rose ceremony was not aired is because they trashed Eric, another thing he was pre-occupied about how his departure was going to be aired and how would be protrayed. He had his own career and life work to think about and he had a right to be concerned how this would ultimately effect that.

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