Can someone help me out here? Are women across America going to be able to function like normal human beings today now that the first “50 Shades of Grey” trailer has been released? Are all the sexually frustrated, bored housewives out there now in full freak out mode that their mommy porn movie is officially starting to come to life? This is a big day for them you know. They are a different breed. Kinda like the Star Wars nerds getting a hard on when JJ Abrams tweets a picture of the Millennium Falcon from the set of the new movie, I feel like there’s the same reaction happening today seeing clips of this movie. Then again, if your life revolves around the release of a movie 6 months away, there probably isn’t much hope for you to begin with. I’ve never read any of the three books, nor do I plan to. But has any man? Ever? What guy would read fantasy porn? I mean maybe there are some freaks out there with wild ass fetishes that are probably in to that stuff, but I’m guessing no self-respecting guy decided to sit down and say, “You know what? I’m really gonna immerse myself into the ’50 Shades’ trilogy.” Any guy who did I’m assuming lives alone and read the books with his pants down at his ankles. Just saying.
Speaking of full freak out mode, that was basically what we got yesterday when the story broke about the next “Bachelor” choice coming down to Arie and Chris. The story was actually broke by Radar on Tuesday, but for whatever reason, people only started emailing me about it yesterday. The fact of the matter is, it’s true. I’ve said all along it’s going to be Chris. And maybe it still will be him. But Arie is definitely in the mix now and someone they are seriously considering. Didn’t see it coming since he’s yesterday’s news, but I’m very well aware he’s got a following, so I could see why they’d choose him if they did. My opinion? Professionally, it’d be better if they chose Arie. Personally, I’d rather see them pick Chris. Chris is the safe pick. Chris is the person on everyone’s mind right now because his run just ended and he’s the only name that’s really been mentioned for the last 3 months. The Arie choice has more “sizzle” and shock value to it, because it came out of nowhere. Well, not anymore since it’s out there he’s a possibility, but you know what I mean.
Whatever the case, one of these guys getting screwed. Either Arie is getting screwed because they’ve already filmed him in Arizona and hired him a personal trainer, yet would still choose Chris. Or Chris is getting screwed because he was flown to LA this week to meet with executives (after already meeting with them during the weekend of the MTA tapings), yet they filmed Arie in Arizona and hired him a personal trainer. So yeah, one of them is getting strung along right now by the show. I can make a case for either guy getting picked for the role. Arie would be for shock value since they know he’s got a rabid fan base, but the fact he’s publicly dated two other women from the franchise (Courtney and Selma), has numerous ex-girlfriends and hookups just chomping at the bit to run to tabloids to sell him out, and the fact that nobody would buy for a second he’s interested in finding a wife, is what would make the choice of him very curious. With that said, I could see them doing it because it would get people talking. And Chris, although looking great on paper, doesn’t really have the “buzz” that would resonate over choosing Arie. So in the end, I guess it all depends on what they’re looking for because these two guys couldn’t be more polar opposite if they tried. Do you go with the successful, Middle America, corn field boy who genuinely probably is looking for a wife since he lives in a town with less than 1,000 people, or do you go with the playboy, who lives in two bedroom condo with a roommate in Arizona who’s been known to show up at any party where girls barely out of college attend? I don’t know when the decision is coming. But when I hear who they’ve officially chosen, I’ll let you know.
I could not believe my eyes this morning when I read this story on US Weekly’s website today. I mean, once I saw the headline I immediately thought, “Oh boy. Here they go again trying to claim something as their own.” But for the first time in probably 5 years, US Weekly actually credited me with a story they ran a month later. Guess today is my lucky day or something. The other things that’s weird about this is the fact that they just flat out spoiled “Bachelor in Paradise.” Tabloids don’t spoil shows. They have to sell magazines, so as this show is airing, they run stories about contestants, ex boyfriends and girlfriends, any arrest records, etc. But they’ll never just throw in a story before the finale, “Andi is engaged to Josh!” Just like the “Bachelor” tells a story throughout the season, so do tabloids. That’s why the season begins, you don’t see stories about any of the final four people. They’re not gonna tell you in week 1 that one of the final 2 guys did this or did that. No, they save that towards the end of the season because that’s when it’s relevant. It’s how tabloids work. US Weekly absolutely knows that Andi chose Josh. They’ve known for months. But they don’t start running their “Andi & Josh” stories until closer to the end of the season, because if they run it in the beginning, what good does that do them? Not sure why they just flat out spoiled “Bachelor in Paradise” though. Maybe they were sick of getting beat to every story about this franchise by me so they figured since it’s a new show, and they don’t know if the audience is hooked yet, they’d hook them with the Marcus/Lacy engagement. Definitely outside the norm for them, especially when they have a working relationship with the show’s production company, but hey, thanks for the acknowledgement today.
Don’t forget the live video chat tonight at 9:00pm EST/6:00pm PST where I’ll be taking your questions on all things “Bachelorette” and “Bachelor in Paradise” related. And Christian and Anastasia too.