Reality Steve

Bachelor in Paradise

“Reader Emails,” “Dr. Reality Steve,” & Live Video Chat Tonight at 9:00pm EST/6:00pm PST

Reality Steve,

First off, love your column! It’s the only reason why I still watch this trash.

I was wondering the timeline from everything like the dates, rose ceremony, ect. I’ve heard a lot of them say it’s been three weeks since we’ve been here but I know the whole show was filmed in 3 weeks. Hope this makes sense!

Thanks for all you do

Comment: Yeah, filming was three weeks long. Sometimes when they’re talking they say “weeks” meaning “episodes,” but then when Sarah was confronting Elise about being giddy over Chris, she did say that she’d only known him for a few days. That was an editing screw up. They want the contestants to talk in “weeks,” which is episodes to them. And trust me, there are plenty of people that watch these shows that actually believe that.

Hi Steve,

Long time reader here – had a few questions for you:

1. Saw an article saying that the producers sent some folks home before taping began on Bachelor in Paradise, including Mikey Tenerelli…any insight on who else was sent home and why? Shannon Bair (Gibbons) from Jason’s season was never flown out there, but she was someone packed and ready to go and never made it. That’s the only one for sure I know of. Mikey was definitely waiting in a hotel room in Mexico for a week before getting sent home.

2. Any insight as to the story behind Ashlee and Graham already dating before Bachelor in Paradise taped and why they faked meeting each other for the first time? Not true.

3. Lastly, what do people do on their down time when they go abroad on Bachelor/Bachelorette? Do they have time to do any sightseeing or are the producers pretty much with them 24/7?

Thanks again, have been a fan for a long time and appreciate all of your insightful and fun take on the show.

Comment: Sometimes emails like this confuse me. I appreciate people who are long time readers of my column, but then they ask me questions that have been answered so many different times, I wonder if they’re just saying that. Like, this email was sent after Tuesday’s recap went up when on Page 1, I wrote a whole paragraph about how the AshLee and Graham rumor wasn’t true.

And the “do the contestants get to sight see when they’re in other cities” has been answered easily at least 10-15 times over the years in recaps and “Reader Emails.” I know I write a lot of words, and sometimes too much, but I don’t know, I just don’t understand sometimes how someone is a long time reader, yet apparently every time I answered that question, they missed it. Oh well.

Hey Steve!

Got a couple of questions.

1. Have noticed that many of the former contestants have social media such as twitter where they say something along the lines of “for inquiries / business opportunities / appearances… at…” It gives an email address that appears to be an agent and not a personal address.
Just a few former contestants who have this are Sean, Juan Pablo, Michelle Money, Ashlee, Bukowski, Des, Josh Murray, Clare…..and even Marcus Brodd.

What kind of inquiries or appearances are these people getting? You go on a reality show to meet a husband or a wife and all of sudden someone wants to contact you for an appearance or business opportunity? Are these people really getting offers and paid appearances or is it just their huge egos thinking they will somehow strike it big from being on the show? These people actually think so much of themselves after being on the show that the get a talent agent to suck up all of their 15 minutes of fame? They definitely get contacted for appearances. Bars, restaurants, etc that promote certain contestants will be there are doing it to generate a crowd. You may not think of them as a big deal, but in certain fans’ minds, they are and they want to meet them.

2. Have there been any contestants that have finished in the top 6 that just fade away and are never to be heard from again after the show ends? It seems that every last one of them is an attention seeking whore who can’t stop trying to stay relevant any way possible, whether it is showing up to any bachelor party or trying to get thousands of followers on social media and posting ridiculous selfies.

Comment: One that immediately comes to mind is Nicki Sterling from Ben’s season that finished 3rd. I haven’t seen one picture of her on social media involved with anything to do “Bachelor” related since their season ended. And that’s saying something. I’m sure there are a others, not many, but a few. But Nicki absolutely has disappeared and doesn’t do anything franchise related anymore. Good for her.

Just two questions

Do u watch dwts?
And how many days was Danielle there?

Comment: Wow. Ummm, yes, and 2-3 days.

Hey Steve!

As with many of your questions, this may have been asked before, but here goes….Last night, Danielle came on and said in her interviews that she was interested in Marquel, which is why she came on the show. If for some reason, Marquel had not been given a rose by Michelle, or anyone else, he would have left the show. If Marquel had left, would the producers have still brought on Danielle, knowing that she was interested in Marquel? I know this show is new in format in many ways, but just wondering your thought on that.


Comment: If Marquel had been eliminated before Danielle was supposed to come on? Yeah, I think there’s a good chance she never would’ve made it on.

So let me get this straight. Ben leaves because he has a GF, Marquel falls for Jackie but she has a BF according to Instagram anyway.

Were these two just called on to be on the show because they have a huge following?

This show really sucks, but I can’t stop watching.

Thanks for the updates.

Comment: I know Jackie was dating some guy for like a year but they broke up like a month before she went on the show. Haven’t checked her Instagram since to see if she’s back with him.

I think they cast Ben just so they could have a built-in villain.

How are they going to make Chris look like a non-Player when he is the Bachelor? The Bachelor in Paradise edit is not in his favor. He basically said he was going on the date with Elise to have sex.

Comment: Ummmmm, Chris Soules is the next “Bachelor.” Not Chris Bukowski. Yikes.

Hi Steve,

So I think it just hit me yesterday that I am enjoying Bachelor in Paradise way more than I have enjoyed the past three or so seasons of the Bachelor/Bachelorette.
Des, other than the finale, was a snooze, Juan Pablo was a train wreck and Andi just seemed to be the same old formula (down to earth country guy, the sensitive one, the guy who everyone hates and the one she clearly wanted to pick from day one). The Bachelor has pretty much become background noise to me, but I really cannot look away from BIP. I think what I like the most is how it is basically one big spoof of itself and doesn’t take itself even a fraction as seriously as the other shows do. It’s basically “lets get our nuttiest contestants together and watch sh*t happen.” Brilliant.

A few random thoughts:

1) I think we all need to just ‘fess up and admit we are going to miss Elise. Has there ever been a contestant so just completely on her own planet as far as sanity and reality go?? I mean the poor girl probably became involved in porn because she convinced herself she would be winning an Oscar within the next month. She’s is so far removed from reality, I don’t think she’s ever coming back.

2) I am sad for both Sarah and Michelle. They both seem to have pretty big self esteem issues and express them totally differently. Michelle latches on immediately and Sarah pulls away because in her head she seems to already be setting herself up for a let down. I agree.

3) I want to be sad for AshLee since she also seems like she could benefit from some therapy, but unlike Sarah and Michelle, AshLee just does not seem like that nice of a person. She’s constantly making bitch face at the other girls, treats the other men like they aren’t deserving of her (because clearly, only Graham is) and really just shows zero empathy or even emotion toward anyone but herself and whoever her latest male obsession is. I kind of wonder if she even has any friends. I have no idea.

4) I wasn’t a huge Clare fan during Juan Pablo’s season but I am really liking her now. I’m actually kind of bummed she and Zach didn’t work out since they’re pretty cute.

Comment: I didn’t have that big of a problem with Clare on JP’s season. This time around, she’s pretty good comedy. You know, chatting with a raccoon and all. And oh yeah, being fascinated by pregnant turtles.

Hi Steve,

A couple of questions for you…

1. Is Elise really as dumb as they make her appear? Or does she, as well as producers make her look worse? I think the former.

2. Was Chris’s knee really that badly injured? Would think him bring the fake whore that he is would have sucked it up and stayed? According to that interview I posted on page 1, sounded pretty serious. He had to have surgery on it.

3. Just an observation….Michelle Money thought she could steal poor Sarah’s crush because she thinks she’s prettier than Sarah! Glad he saw through her.


I know you’ve touched on Michelle Money and your inability to understand why she’d continue appearing on these silly Bachelor shows, so I wanted to add my name to the WTF list.

All of these people are old enough to know better than to act like 12 yr. olds but Michelle is getting a leeeeetle long in the tooth to be acting this way. I used to like her but now? I only feel pity for her. She comes across as desperate, clingy and immature. The fact that she’s a mother just makes it that much worse.

Graham is too old to be hanging out with these people too but at least he’s not acting the fool….yet.

Question: any idea as to how much $ these people made? And why couldn’t they get people that lasted longer in their Bach/’ette seasons? I mean, paid for vacation? I would have thought that would be attractive enough for them. Sure, they didn’t know the details of the show but then again, these people aren’t exactly known for their ability to reason.

Thanks Steve.

Comment: From what I’m hearing, the range was anywhere from about $7,000-$15,000 total. Not everyone made the same amount.

Hi Steve,

Thoroughly enjoyed the recap of this week’s episode. You had me laughing out loud at Chris and Elise’s date and Clare seeing hope in a pregnant turtle. Though Elise is an absolute nut and a level 10 clinger, she’s not as scary as Ashlee. That girl is scary crazy and her ass doesn’t compensate for it. Hot babies did it for me. Who says that? Oh yeah, a nutty, needy, certifiable Ashlee. I mean there has to be something really wrong considering she’s in her 30s, dated a lot of guys and all of them have said no thanks to a girl that pretty. AshLee definitely had a little crazy/clingy in her this season, but Elise takes the cake for me. From all the stuff she’s done since she first graced our TV sets on JP’s season, it’s a no brainer for me.

I’m surprised at the lack of focus so far on Marcus and Lacy. Since they are the success story of the season, I would expect to see more of their love story unfolding. I mean they show them laying on the beach here and there and some shots of Lacy’s enormous rack in fabulous bikini tops, but that’s about it. I would think the show would want to showcase the “real” love story in contrast to the vapid, train wreck the rest of them are.

Comment: They seem to at least give them one segment an episode. Last episode they had 4 dates to cover (none of which were Marcus and Lacy), and they still gave them time alone together. Next week Cody gives Marcus his date card, so, you’ll see more. That’s when he tells her he loves her going off the previews.

Hi Steve,

I have a couple of questions about the previews for next week’s BIP.

They showed a shot of some guy with a beard who I didn’t recognize. Any idea who he is? Jesse Kovacs.

Do you know what Ashlee says to Graham that is so terrible and shocking? Was in Tuesday’s column. Graham was sick and walked off before AshLee ever said his name.

Any idea what Lesley Murphy from Sean’s season does for a living? Apparently she lives in Argentina and travels and stays in luxury hotels and then blogs about it….where do I sign up for that gig?

Comment: I just know she moved to Argentina to live with her boyfriend, but I don’t know what he does. Nor do I know what she does. That was the first I’d seen that she had a blog.

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  1. bigfatwoman

    August 21, 2014 at 10:14 AM

    To the woman with the daughter being strung along…..

    she needs to stop responding…..he likes keeping women (several I’m sure) on the hook and your daughter needs to stop playing along. I’m sure if she knew how many women he randomly texts at various times, she would feel like a fool.

  2. c104

    August 21, 2014 at 10:58 AM

    Since you asked about crate training, yes, you should leave Maddie in the crate every time you leave. You might have to work on short periods of time first. It’s about consistency and security for her. It’s not supposed to be a punishment. It’s supposed to be her home, her den. Lots of stuff on line about successful crate training. Good luck! It will help her.

    As for the email from a long-time fan questioning whether the contestants can sight see abroad, I don’t remember the answer either. Why bother to publish the question if you’re just going to express your confusion on why they don’t already know? We don’t commit every word to memory. In fact, I’ve forgotten who some of the leads are. 😉 To that person: No, generally, the contestants not on dates are holed up in their hotels. There have been exceptions, though. On Emily’s season, some of the guys went to church on Easter. Who knows? Things may have changed some in the last season, too.

  3. jessicat

    August 21, 2014 at 11:43 AM

    Hmmm…my email was included but part of it was missine. Also, he didn’t answer one of my questions properly. I asked about the previews for the upcoming epiosde where they show that AshLee said something terrible and shocking to Graham (everyone was saying stuff to AshLee like “how could you say that to him?”), and Steven answered about something to do with the rose ceremony. I wanted to know what AshLee had said to Graham that was so awful.

  4. jessicat

    August 21, 2014 at 11:43 AM


  5. vessel

    August 21, 2014 at 12:47 PM

    @Jessicat, I’d ask him again for his live chat tonight. He often only partially answers my questions, too.

  6. jessicat

    August 21, 2014 at 12:57 PM

    Thanks vessel.

  7. cjscjs711

    August 21, 2014 at 10:42 PM

    The gal with the flaky dude – neither seems all that into the other. There’s some attraction, admiration, friendship – something on that level. As long as she’s not head over heels, where’s the harm. As long as the guy’s not stalking her in some sick way – no harm. With the internet, these kinds of I’m-bored-who’s-around-to-talk-to relationships are common. If she was ‘being an Elise’ about the guy, THAT would be cause for concern……

  8. JovisMom

    August 22, 2014 at 6:49 AM

    Does anyone remember what Erica Rose said to/about Steve that was so awful? I remember reading it but have forgot.

  9. mariet

    August 22, 2014 at 8:21 AM

    I believe she double crossed him and got him in trouble with ABC.

  10. rob22

    August 22, 2014 at 2:19 PM

    Yes, Erica Rose ratted RS out and got him sued. Lots of integrity with that one. Maybe RS shouldn’t have been doing what he was doing, but Erica Rose literally copied up to him with the purpose being to nail him for MF. Low.

  11. calichamp

    August 24, 2014 at 10:36 AM

    I love that MamaDs is a must stop in MB. good call!

  12. cjscjs711

    August 24, 2014 at 9:42 PM

    So right about the guys laugh. I tried turning the volume down ……

  13. amac

    August 25, 2014 at 8:18 AM

    Re: Courtenay reading her own audio book
    I enjoy listening to audio books all the time; the worst ones to listen to are when the author reads their own work. Best ones are when actors are hired.
    Not hopeful after hearing this, just saying…

  14. rob22

    August 25, 2014 at 12:41 PM

    I agree. I had a book on tape that Hank Aaron read… His own autobiography. He sounded only slightly annoyed when describing the racism he had to deal with…. Because he was reading the words, and that stirred a little emotion, but I’m sure not the same emotion as when he talks about that stuff at a dinner party.

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