Good luck to all the women heading out this Sunday & Monday to LA to begin filming for the “Bachelor.” I believe most are leaving on Monday with filming set to begin Thursday night. Just know your life is about to change. And your inbox is about to be full of former male contestants trying to get in your pants the second you get back from filming. Kinda the way it works. You are the new incoming freshman to this giant sorority, and the male members from fraternity Alpha Bachelor Nu are trying to see if they can be the first ones to stake their claim to you. Oh, it’ll start off innocently enough with a “Welcome to the Family” direct message on Twitter, then become “hey, what’s your email,” and then it’ll slowly move in to texting. Just know that when they’re texting you, they’re texting other women from your season and from other seasons, and just seeing who’ll bite. Wash, rinse, repeat. It’s the same story every season. Whatever they’re telling you, they’re telling the same to other girls as well. Hell, if you play it smart, you can catch them in the act. Then again, I’m sure most of you are going on the show just so you CAN meet other guys in the franchise, so I guess it all works out. But good luck to all of you. Once I start releasing names next week, expect your Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook followers to increase. That’s what they do. I wonder what would happen if I just didn’t release anyone’s name all season, then when it was over, just gave it all out in one long post? Trust me, I have thought about it. One of these days I might…
-Because she’s the Mother of the Year every year, it’s really shocking to see that Kris Jenner never gave Kylie permission to pump up her lips like she just gave mouth love to a hot curling iron. At 17, do you really need to be injecting your lips as much as she does? Probably not, but then again, this is the Kardashian’s world and we’re all just visiting. Or is it Taylor Swift’s world? Tough call.
-There’s a new craze going on over in Asia that I don’t understand. Fainting. Yes, dog walkers are recording themselves fainting while walking their dogs to see the reaction they get. If these are three examples of what to expect, it’s safe to say that 1/3 of all dogs out there don’t care if their owner faints. I love the two that just keep on truckin’ like nothing has happened. Don’t even bother to look back either.
-Guess what? More Kardashian news. This time it’s Kendall. Because photographers and paparazzi can be the ultimate creepers, we just recently have discovered that Kendall Jenner has her nipples pierced. Well that’s just outstanding. I mean, why should we care about this? Granted, Kendall could fart and it’d make national news, and I wouldn’t expect anything less when a major body part is pierced, but still. To zoom in on her top to prove it? Oh boy. I can’t wait til she pierces her lady bits.
-Just like it’s 1990 all over again, Pam Anderson decided to take her clothes off for something named “Flaunt” magazine. I guess you kinda have to if the name of your mag is “Flaunt.” In it she talks about her sex tape if it happened today wouldn’t be that big of deal considering what people send to each other on their phones. True. That video was like the Holy Grail when it came out back in 2005. It was really unlike anything we’ve ever seen before. Or so I’ve been told.
-Here’s a list of the most tweeted about shows in the fall for last year, with “Grey’s Anatomy” topping the list. Maybe I didn’t read this thoroughly but were they not including reality shows? Because I know the “Bachelor” and “Bachelorette” are basically trending worldwide on Monday night’s when they’re airing every week. Could just be scripted shows. Oh well. Whatever the case, advertisers absolutely are taking into account social media activity of these shows when buying ad time now. You have to.
-Speaking of advertisers, already a couple have pulled out of the “View,” after these trashed the Miss America contestant whose “talent” was being a nurse. Real smart, ladies. How about this? How about every advertiser just pulls out now so the show will go off the air since no one under 60 watches that garbage? I think that would be perfect.
-If being linked to Bethenny Frankel wasn’t enough, Eric Stonestreet figured he needed to do one better so he pulled some hottie and took her to Disneyland for all to see. I’m not really sure what’s going on here, but he’s absolutely outkicking his coverage on this one, no doubt. Then again, I don’t think it takes much for him to be with someone where he’s the lesser of the two in the looks department. As the saying goes, “There’s no such thing as an unattractive man with money.” Believe that.
-I think they’ve been married about 12 minutes so far, and already the divorce rumors have started for Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux. Should we expect anything less? I mean, hasn’t she already been pregnant in the tabloids 15 times and has yet to produce a baby? Can’t we pretty much assume she’s not going to have a baby at 46. Can she? Sure. It is medically possible. But something tells me if these two have a kid they will adopt.
-For some reason, Jessica Simpson showed up on the “Home Shopping Network” last night to pimp out some jeans. And judging by her performance, she might wanna stay off TV for a little while longer. Maybe there’s a reason we haven’t seen her on TV for years. Is this an act where she plays the chatty, ditzy blonde role, or is she just loopy off meds or something? You be the judge:
-We had a mini “Hills” reunion during New York Fashion Week when Kristin Cavallari met up with Audrina Patridge. All is now right with the world. Now, lets just get Brody in on that, maybe mix in a little Speidi and Lauren, and we can just shoot the show all over again, despite how fake it was. Why hasn’t Kristin gone to “Kristin Cutler” yet, by the way? It’s not like she has an acting career or does anything anymore?
-And finally, we can all breath a sigh of relief now that Megan Fox has rejoined Instagram after posting a pic yesterday. Whew. I was beginning to worry there for a minute. Just because you dumped David Silver doesn’t mean you can hide from all of us who want to see you on a daily basis. So thank you for re-joining. I think my days can continue now.
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