Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails,” & Former “Bachelor” Contestant Dies

Photo Credit: ABC

So yesterday I posed the question of assuming they’re keeping the same shooting schedule, and they will start filming the “Bachelorette” the week the “Bachelor” finale airs (so sometime between March 16th-18th), how can they make JoJo the “Bachelorette” when she has to appear on the ATFR on Monday night the 14th and talk about her time with Ben on the show. The only thing I could come up with is if Chris Harrison says, “We are going to be making our decision at the end of the show and the ladies in the running are all here with us tonight.” And THEN they pick JoJo, being honest about not having made their decision until that moment. However, the more I thought about that scenario, there are two problems that I see: 1) Making your “Bachelorette” choice in front of other girls who DIDNT get picked? Ouch. That’s really rubbing it in and something they’ve never done before. This show is very structured. They don’t deviate from the norm a whole hell of a lot, so to me that doesn’t seem like something they would do and, 2) Believing that JoJo didn’t already know before that decision was made. I don’t think anyone would buy it. So yeah, I tried and now I’m back to square one. I still don’t know how they pull it off and make it believable.

You also gotta remember that in every past season, when they’ve made that “Bachelorette” announcement at the ATFR, that lead has already moved out to LA, done their pre-season photo shoot, and shot an intro video package. I don’t think they would take the risk of doing that before March 14th with a girl who’s still “competing” for Ben. Everybody else but JoJo will have already been eliminated 2 weeks earlier in TV time, so they have plenty of time to do that stuff with them. JoJo doesn’t get eliminated until that night. If it were so easy to do and they could make accommodations, then why have no final 2 girls ever been the “Bachelorette” since they went to this schedule? Certainly there were some good candidates. I just don’t think that’s coincidental.

Tragic news out of the “Bachelor” world as season 14 contestant, Lex McAllister, died yesterday after an apparent suicide attempt over the weekend. This is the second girl from Jake’s season now to have done this after Gia’s suicide a couple years ago. did a more in depth story on her and her family. I never had any contact with Lex over the years and I’m not going to pretend I remembered who she was, because I didn’t. I’m sure most fans don’t considering she was eliminated on the first night 6 years ago. But it doesn’t make it any less sad. From everything I’ve heard, even though she went home the first night, she was someone that a few contestants stayed friends with over the years. Thoughts and prayers are with her family.

Nell Kalter has her RHOBH recap now for your viewing. How come it seems like more happens on the “Watch What Happens Live” shows than these actual Housewives shows? Then again, I don’t watch so maybe it doesn’t. But I will at least give RH of Dallas a try when it premieres in April. I set the over/under of episodes I last is 3.

Get your “Dr. Reality Steve” emails in for tomorrow. Yesterday I set a goal of 10 emails. Right now I’m at 5. C’mon. We can do this. I believe in you. I think.


Hi Steve,

Just read your thoughts about “Ryan’s Roses” and how all these radio bits are fake. My grandpa use to work for the studios and he told me whenever you see a commercial where they “test real people” to get their reactions (think: blind taste test, “SURPRISE it’s Jack in the Box” or this must be a luxury car, “SURPRISE it’s a Chevy”) they are 100% of the time actors. Every. Single. Time. Paid actors. Thought I’d help you back up your theory because you know there will be doubters.

Comment: Absolutely. Those are definitely actors.

Hi Steve,

You were listing the last 5 years of episode 6s and drew a blank on Ashley’s season.

Bentley returns!

Comment: Duh. How could I possibly forget Bentley? Thanks for the reminder.

listening to Kristen Doute on Stassi Schroeder’s podcast (both from Vanderpump Rules). Kristen just said she spoils the Bachelor for herself with Reality Steve lol

Comment: Well, good to know. I have no idea who Kristen is or what her character is like on that show, but if Nell Kalter’s recaps are any indication, Kristen isn’t Miss Goody Two Shoes by any stretch of the imagination.

Hi Steve,

Have you listened to the Afterbuzz podcast (the one with Brooks)? I listened to it for the first time today, and was pretty impressed with the commentary from Brooks.

They were dissecting the Olivia situation and asking Brooks if it is good to have that kind of attention from the lead early on, and he says Yes. He goes on to talk about his season and how producers gave him special treatment, created time for him and the lead; whereas others had to make that time for themselves (“fight for time” as we hear on the show a lot). So he knew he was in good standing. I imagine this would be good confidence-boosting for any contestant, and this info gives the viewer some idea of what is going on BTS to make someone really confident. That could have been happening with Olivia all along — so people saying how delusional she was should think about all the BTS we don’t see.

Brooks (who for some reason I get mixed up with Arie and want to call him Arie) also talked about a pecking order in the Bachelor Franchise, and that the viewers should check out who are the people in the first couple rows of the Bachelor wedding on the anniversary special to understand who is considered royalty (Michelle Money, Andi – people who are tight with Chris Harrison). Anyway, funny commentary.

Comment: Well, we didn’t get many shots of the actual seating assignments at the wedding, but I think just by natural coverage over the years, you know who they favor and who they don’t.

I’ve never listened to the Afterbuzz podcast.

Hi Steve,

I read Ali F. and Sharleen’s blogs as faithfully as I read yours, and was wondering if you have any other favorite “former contestant” blogs that you would share with us?

Comment: The only one I read is Sharleen’s. Just by Twitter, I think Ashley I. writes one, but I’ve never read it. I’m sure there are others who do them, but I have no idea who.

Hey Steve!

First of all, I’d like give you my honest condolences for little Maddie. I remember a friend of mine losing his 17 year old dog, and he cried for about a week! I definitely feel the pain.

Second, I have a question regarding Caila. I know no girl has been picked as the bachelorette as of today. However apparently she seems like a good candidate from what you say. Really? She hasn’t opened up once and she doesn’t seem like the sharpest knife in the drawer. To me she would be the equivalent of Chris Soules’ season, where his sentences were full of “well”s and “ums”. Would guys actually fall for that type of bland–yet qualified as a sex panther– and young–she IS young!–woman? Thanks for your input. I love your blog, and read it religiously. Keep it up 🙂

Comment: You ask “will guys fall for…” That doesn’t matter. All they need is a few to really like her, and they’ve got their show. Of course 25 guys aren’t going to be head over heels for her. It’s never been that way with any lead. And as I say every season, who the lead is doesn’t matter. This show is made in who they cast as the 25 guys. Always has been, always will be. I could list all previous 11 “Bachelorettes” and tell you when they were announced, plenty of people out there didn’t like the choice for myriads of reasons. You can make a case for or against anyone. Hence the reason why the show works. It’s about the other things that matter more to people. Ultimately, they’ll watch.

Do I think JoJo fits the lead role better than Caila? Absolutely. But that’s not my choice to make. I’m still going to do my job no matter who the lead is, so I really don’t care who gets it. That’s not my concern. People like who they like. Plenty of people don’t like JoJo as well. Anyone can make an argument for the person THEY want in the role. That’s easy. But only one person gets it, so to me, debating about it seems rather pointless. They’ll pick someone, I’ll spoil it. Done.

Hi Steve,

I’ve really enjoyed Amanda’s maturity and how she carries herself without constantly reminding us that “she left her kids to be there” as if she was forced to do it like most moms do on this show. I think she would make an awesome Bachelorette and my husband also insists “she’s the finest one there” and I mean after two kids she looks amazing. What do you think her chances are of being the next Bachelorette and who would you like to see the Bachelorette? Before the season I saw it. Not so much anymore. Not because she did anything wrong on the show. I just don’t think she was featured all that much.

I also want to say this has been the best season I can remember in a while. Especially last episode the husband and I were super entertained and I personally loved watching Leah get eliminated. I even dare say Ben is a better Bachelor than Sean Lowe and I love most of the girls on this season.

Can I say I could not stand Jubilee on the show? She was so insecure and such a downer all the time. Sean Lowe even tweeted something out saying Jubilee’s name is ironic. He even had some backlash from people on that particular tweet. There’s some people on Twitter saying they won’t watch anymore because all the other girls are dumb blonde bimbos or boring, seriously?! Others are saying she should be the next Bachelorette but honestly she wasn’t cut out for this show and I think the tattoos are a little excessive and kind of unattractive (coming from somebody with a tattoo). To each their own. Again, it’s what makes this show so successful. Everyone has their favorites.

I follow Cody and Michelle Money on Snapchat and I think they are back on. Recently (a week ago I think) he went to Utah to visit and in one of the Snaps Michelle referred to him as “Babe.” I saw that. Your guess is as good as mine as to what’s going on with them.

Are Marcus and Lacy still on? It certainly doesn’t look like it. 14 consecutive weeks where neither of them has bothered to post a picture with or of the other one on social media, when that’s all they did leading up to the last 14 weeks.

Hi, Steve,

Quoting you re Bachelor contestant Leah:

“I usually don’t mention religion with these women, but Leah is Jewish. It’s relevant this season because Ben is very much into his Christian faith. Could be an issue, could not.”

That got me to wondering. Did Ben know Leah was Jewish? If he did, then I’d say that was as good a reason as any why he chose not to “get to know” her. From what I read, she is a somewhat observant Jew. He might have privately crossed her off his list early on for that reason. Who knows?

What I’m also wondering is, did this idea never cross Leah’s mind during filming? “Gosh, he’s Christian, I’m Jewish, maybe the faith difference is a deal breaker for him…”

I mean, really—it never occurred to her? Really? Come on!

Then again, maybe she did ask about that possibility, and her handler convinced her that religion was not an issue with Ben. Whatever—I just have a hard time understanding Leah’s seemingly total bewilderment about Ben’s lack of interest in her.

Best regards.

Comment: Yeah, I don’t know a whole hell of a lot about their relationship. No idea what happened there.

Hey Steve,

I love reading your site and it makes watching the show more fun.

Anyways, I liked Jubilee and thought she seemed sweet and all that, but I just don’t understand why everyone thinks she should be the next lead. I understand everyone wants diversity and I agree, but just not with Jubilee. (Not that I’m saying our resident Disney Princess, Caila, is diverse at all).

I just think that if you can’t handle being a contestant on the show and can’t handle seeing the Bachelor with a bunch of different women, why do people think she’d be able to handle being the lead? I’m might be off base, but I also felt like she had a bit of an attitude. Plus, where was her confusing AF speech/audition on their one-on-one?

I also heard she reenlisted? Do you know anything about that? I just saw what you saw on her Twitter. Or was it Instagram? Whatever the case, looks like she’s re-enlisted. But I can’t imagine them ever casting someone as the lead who finished 11th, no matter if she fills a minority quotient for them or not.

A couple more things, I heard that Ben might do DWTS this next season. Do you have any insider information on that? And if he does go on the show, do you think his reputation will take a hit? A lot of people see him as a down to earth guy, but by going on yet another reality show, he will start coming off as the stereotypical reality star in my opinion. I could see him doing it and would actually be surprised if he wasn’t cast. It’ll all depend on the viewer. Some certainly will look at him that way, and some won’t. It’s hard to fault anyone for accepting that gig. Easy 6 figure paycheck. Not easy in that it’s easy to dance. But easy in that you get $100-125k just to appear on the show, no matter how long you last.

Also, Leah is doing photo shoots. Do you know why? Is she a model now? No idea. But you can bet your ass she’ll be on Paradise.

It drives me crazy that most of these people can’t just go back to their old jobs instead of getting into fashion, more TV, blah, blah,blah.

Comment: It shouldn’t. Yeah, it’s annoying, but don’t think about it for more than five seconds. It has zero bearing on your life.

Hey RS…I know you hate message boards, but I just HAAAAAAD to send this to you! Over on that lame message board, they have these things called fan pages where you can talk about contestants but only if you totally fan girl all over them. Most of the people obviously like Lauren B. (because they all read your spoiler and know she wins), but I had to cut and paste this from a new person who signed up just to write this to a bunch of strangers. Is it me or this totally bizarre? Like, who cares this much about these people that they don’t know?????? Love your site!!! Lets hope this person doesn’t die of a heart attack when Ben chooses Lauren in the end.

Hello, everyone!

This is my first time posting here and I’m so glad I found this thread. Ever since I found this two weeks ago, I’ve been checking it day and night. And you guys really make my life! ;)) I am such a Lauren B addict now that I begin to not care about Ben anymore hahaha But of course I still want them to end up together.

I have so many thoughts about Lauren B and Ben and I’ve been commenting around Anna Marie’s youtube vids or Lauren B’s photo tags in Instagram and finally I get to air out my feelings in this thread… with my fellow addicts. ;p

I DO FEEL THAT BEN AND LAUREN WILL END UP TOGETHER. But those previews really get in my head! I HATE TPTB!! I can’t help but think how perfect Ben would be if he becomes a part of the Bushnell family. I want to be in their family, really!! Ben being an only child would really need a big and close-knit family like Lauren’s. And her dad, her dad, can we forward to the Hometown Date and get a look at her dad’s yard?? Cutie pie!

Recently, I saw Ben’s tweet about Fixer Upper. And I thought that it must be Lauren’s influence on him, because I checked and he just followed Chip and Joanna Gaines on Twitter (maybe 3 days ago?). So he must be a recent fan of the show. This really increased my faith that they ended up together! YESSSSS

I agree with the previous message that they should show more conversations of BenLo. TPTB always highlights the shallow stuff: whenever Lauren says “Whenever I’m with you, I can’t stop smiling.” THEY ARE KEEPING THINGS FROM US. I really don’t think those are the only things they talk about. Hopefully in the 1-on-1 on Monday, we get to see more from them getting to know each other and really deepening their relationship.

Comment: That’s seriously one of the most pathetic things I’ve ever read. How sad. Lets hope that person doesn’t reproduce one day.

Good Afternoon,

First, sorry you have had a bad couple of weeks, hope you are doing better. Second, I believe you are right in your spoilers but oh how I wish you were wrong. Lauren B is not my favorite. I watch expressions and she seems to have had that looking down the nose expression a lot during this season. Maybe I am wrong but that is how it appears to me.

Have a great day.

Comment: Unfortunately for you, I’m not wrong.


I thought it was hilarious that you were asked to relay a bad date story during the live chat this week. I think you should include this as a regular segment on the chats.

Since the Bachelor is all about fabulous, over-the-top dates, it would be a funny contrast to share bad date stories during the chats.

Have a great weekend!

Comment: Hmmmm, interesting. I don’t think I could do that every week in the chats though. I’ll run out.

Hi Steve,

I’m hooked on the bachelor this season and TiVo every episode so I can watch them over and over again each week. I noticed at the end of episode 1 when they showed the previews for the season they showed Leah with a black eye and her saying, “ that bitch gave me a black eye”. I even went back to look to make sure it was Leah and it was. Did I miss something? Now that she is off the show this week did they take that scene out of an episode? When Leah was lying to Ben about Lauren B. this week I thought for sure there might be a scuffle coming. But nothing. The girls that where left never really talked about her after she left. I felt that whole story line got deleted.

Comment: It never happened, she was never punched, it was made up, and just another thing to tease you with in the season opener that never got shown. They do that every season.

What gives you the right to tell people what’s going to happen on a show such as bachelor/ bachelorette and ruin the show for millions of watchers.

Besides Donald Trump your the biggest jack ass I know.

Comment: Gotta say, first time I’ve ever been compared to the ol’ Donald. Ummm, thanks.

What gives me the right? Oh I don’t know, the fact it’s my website and nothing I’m doing is illegal for starters.

Hey Steve,

So I know you said awhile back that Michelle Money and Cody Sattler filmed some find of reality show after Sean and Catherine. Soooo I am part of Codys “fitfam” and they have been together and she is all up in our Facebook group, which I love, cause I am a big fan of hers, frankly I think she used the show to better herself for the good as opposed to some E entertainment co hosts. Anywho, you think that’s why they a real together all the time these days? In prep for the show? I know you don’t know for sure, but was kinda just wondering if you know if that show is coming out soon, cause then this timing would be quite coincidental.

Comment: I honestly have no idea what’s going on with them.

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  1. hurricaneemily

    February 17, 2016 at 8:25 AM

    Hi, Steve.

    It’s really sad to hear about another suicide in the Bachelor family. My thoughts and prayers are with the family too.

    I’ve been trying like heck to gloss over your spoilers but I accidentally caught one. I predicted very early on that JoJo would be the next Bachelorette and I saw a glimpse that they are trying to get her to be the next Bachelorette which means she isn’t the girl who makes it in the end. I never thought she would but I hate knowing!

    You can check out my recap for episode 7 here:

  2. nsawyer10

    February 17, 2016 at 8:38 AM

    Do they NEED to announce bachelorette on the ATFR? That is a way they could get around it and make JoJo the one. They haven’t always done that, have they? Anyone remember? I know Steve doesn’t read these comments usually.

  3. kimmyfromdablock

    February 17, 2016 at 9:02 AM

    That “pathetic” email…..omg. I didn’t need to read any further.

  4. deevass

    February 17, 2016 at 10:56 AM

    I have the same question as above…I noticed Jojo follows Ben on twitter & posts a lot of pictures about them vs lauren B. who posts nothing at all. I even noticed Jojo favorites almost everything and again Lauren nothing. Wouldn’t she be upset if she wasn’t picked? It looks like Lauren is the one who is upset. Hope not though, I love Lauren!

  5. laurac

    February 17, 2016 at 12:21 PM

    RE: Sharleen’s blog…

    What this reader left out was the part that comes after.

    “We all have bitchy moments, myself included, but no one is a mean person through and through. Those women have friends in real life, and they had friends in the house as well; you just didn’t hear about them. When I met Courtney for the first time I was struck at how kind she was. She was quieter than most Bachelor girls, but more curious as well.”

    Don’t spin this around to say Sharleen thought Nikki was a bitch because they’ve remained good friends since. Plus Nikki’s best-friendship with Andi was shown a lot. I think all she’s trying to say is that because JP developed an interest in Nikki early on, and she clearly didn;t get along with a few girls like Clare, she became the “love to hate bitch.” But I don’t think Sharleen actually thinks that.

    For the record, I loved Nikki.

  6. debb0

    February 17, 2016 at 12:23 PM

    The 10th Married couple is probably Chris Lambton (Ali’s season) and Peyton (Andy’s season, the girl left on that aircraft carrier, brutal). Saw them on their HGTV show, Going Yard. Cute couple and cute story of how they met.

  7. yellowcrayon

    February 17, 2016 at 1:29 PM

    Jojo is faving/liking/posting because she wants the gig. Desperately.

    I hope they make her think she has it in the bag only to yank it away.

  8. bonniebes

    February 17, 2016 at 2:53 PM

    If Amanda were to be, like, chosen to be The Bachelorette, there’s no way I could, like, watch the show because, like, the girl talks fast, but, like, sprinkles the word “like” everywhere until I can’t, like, even concentrate on what she’s, like, saying. Ohmygosh just no. Not to mention the kids thing.

    And I’m not sure Caila has enough personality to carry the thing. Would love to see it be Jo-Jo. (Would actually have loved Jo-Jo to be Ben’s pick, but I think she self-sabotaged a bit with all the “scared” talk.)

  9. nora j

    February 17, 2016 at 3:23 PM

    Is it really that big of an issue to announce the runner up as the next Bachelorette at the ATFR…I mean we all know some time has passed. It’s not like the AFTR is literally right after the final rose ceremony. Anyway the runner up used to get the gig in the past (eg Trista, Ben, Jason)..if it’s that big of a deal just wait…or don’t wait..not a big deal.

    I think I’d rather see JoJo as the bachelorette than Amanda. I like Amanda but she just got divorced and her kids are so little…she needs to be with her kids, not off doing the bachelorette. she’s also young, she has time to date in the future.

  10. justforfun

    February 17, 2016 at 4:04 PM

    If they wanted JoJo bad enough I’m sure they could find a way to make it work. They had 2 bachelorettes last season which was certainly not their norm. They do sometimes change things up. Steve seems so stuck in thinking they always follow the same pattern when that hasn’t always been the case.

    Amanda is beautiful, but what young, single guy wants to be an instant daddy to 2 kids that aren’t his? I’m guessing none from this franchise.

    Watching Caila would be as exciting as watching paint dry.

  11. rob22

    February 18, 2016 at 6:42 AM

    While I agree that they’ve chosen the F2 before, it’s different for The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. Also, when Trista was chosen as the first Bachelorette, it was under a different production schedule. With The Bachelor, there’s a fair amount of time passage before they starting shooting The Bachelor after The Bachelorette’s final rose. So, it’s more possible there, though they haven’t gone that direction in a long time. With The Bachelorette, they begin shooting just days after ATFR. So, they could do it, but they’d have to do all their pre-Bachelorette photo shoots and prep in stealth mode…. no driving down PCH in a convertible….no bopping around their home town with a camera crew in tow….. or they’d have to squeeze it into a very compressed time frame. A time frame I’m sure they’d rather be spending doing final prep for the actual show.

    Bottom line: It’s highly inconvenient and a logistical nightmare to try to pull in the F2 as The Bachelorette. But if they decided to do it, they could. It seems as though most years the F2 could be a good call. But, so far, they’ve avoided going that direction completely.

  12. nora j

    February 18, 2016 at 10:19 AM

    What happened when Ben (the courtney one) and Jason Mesnick (both F2s) were made the bachelor..when was it announced? I guess later. I still don’t think it’s a big deal for the F2 to be given the spot at AFTR…everything happens so fast on the show anyway. And it will have been a couple months since filming…maybe she’s over him by now. I mean it’s actually good to give the gig to the F2 so they can get over the previous lead faster.

  13. smurfette22

    February 19, 2016 at 7:42 AM

    I noticed how Jojo would post pictures from the show of her and Ben, and retweet and like almost everything on his Twitter. I completely agree that she is trying hard to become the next lead. I hope I don’t regret saying this, but it shows how Lauren seems to be more authentic than Jojo. She seems humble and not so in your face about things. But Jojo is coming off as the typical reality star. But what can we expect from Becca’s BFF/GF?
    Also, Becca kind of acted like a brat at the rose ceremony. Poor Becca, the first guy you actually show interest in doesn’t like you back? Boohoo. That’s called life. Get used to it.
    I’ll watch the show either way, so I don’t really care who the next lead is. With Caila, they will have to cast some very dramatic guys to make it more interesting, but Jojo might be dramatic enough.

  14. traversingthetwincities

    February 19, 2016 at 8:02 AM

    For the person who asked about Holly & Blake not being included… Holly posted a picture on Instagram the night of the 20th Anniversary special saying that it was the dress she had planned to wear to Jade & Tanner’s wedding but that their flight was cancelled due to a blizzard.

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