Reality Steve

The Bachelor 20 - Ben

The “Bachelor” Ben Episode 9 Recap Incl Blogs, Ratings, & Emily Maynard’s Book

Photo Credit: ABC

-Ben began by welcoming us all to Jamaica, even though he had just gotten there himself. And studied up on their Wikipedia page to tell us how wonderful and amazing Jamaica is. “I think Jamaica could be a really great place to fall in love.” You know, I might be going out on a limb here, but if the overnights were in Syria, I’m sure Ben would’ve found a way to say, “I think Syria could be a really great place to fall in love.” Then we get short little montages of all three girls left – the two he loves and the one he doesn’t. He describes each of them and Caila is too happy, Lauren is too good to be true, and Jojo is too smoking hot in her bikini. Or any outfit where she’s letting the girls out, which is pretty much every outfit she wears. She’s not going for the subtle factor, that’s for sure. Hubba bubba. Then we see each girl quickly in voiceovers talking about Ben, all while in forced shots by the producers. Caila is on the boardwalk out to the water, while Lauren and JoJo are in their rooms in their new silky robes. Hey, nothing like stealing some robes from the hotel. Better than that stupid sewing kit they give you.

-Ben and Caila’s date is up first and they’re going to paddles down a river on a raft by a dude that has no idea what he just signed up for. Caila can’t seem to shake out of her funk thinking that there are still two other women involved in this journey, and it makes for an incredibly long, boring river raft ride. A bunch of forced conversation, a lot of silence, and Ben realizing that this chick was just at her senior prom like a couple weeks ago. Caila is fixated on the other two women and not enjoying this river raft nearly as much as Ben isn’t. I think a root canal would’ve been a better time for these two since it probably would’ve had more talking involved in it. Ben kept telling her to let loose, have fun, enjoy everything, and Caila said she would, then would go back to being in her own head, not talking, and dreaming about play house with all her Barbie dolls at home. It was about as uncomfortable an unromantic of a date as you could’ve had at that point. And knowing for the last month they’ve been promoting the hell out of Ben telling two women that he loved them, we kinda saw where this was going.

-On the night portion of their date, Ben feels he needs to address Caila’s, ummmm, boringness earlier in the day. “Today I felt like something else was there.” Caila: “Why yes Ben, I was weird today…I was off…it’s hard knowing two other people are in this.” You don’t say? We had no idea Caila. Thank you for reminding us. “Every other relationship that I’ve been in, I had doubts in my mind…something was wrong…but this just feels right…part of me wanted to tell you something for a long time…and that’s that I’m in love with you.” Yessss!!!!!! She said it!!! Rejoice everyone!!! Rejoice!!!! Caila is in love with Ben!!!! One problem. Ben ain’t having none of that. He more or less took it as, “Coo coo. Thanks for the props. How about a little fist bump.” Of course, in Caila’s mind, she knows the show and she knows that the lead really isn’t allowed to open up and repeat those words back. But little did she know what Benny had in store for later in the episode having diarrhea of the mouth with Lauren and JoJo. So does Caila watch last night’s episode and just shake her head? Or does she still have that giant, stupid, sh** eating grin on her face?

-I know what Caila’s dad was probably doing during that moment hearing his daughter profess her love for a guy she barely knew on national television – hurling a sledgehammer through his TV set. Or taking away all her toys when she gets home. One of the two. It’s time for that all important moment in the overnight date episode. “Ben and Caila. Welcome to the island of Jamaica. Hope you’re enjoying your stay. Should you choose to forgo your individual rooms, please use this key to stay as a couple in the fantasy suite. And Ben, if you decide to do this, you will finally have Filipino in you, which will make Caila’s dad so proud.” Of course she ended up saying yes, but before they frolic around in bed for hours, they head to the water where they make out while fireworks go off for them. These pictures were spoiled that night if you remember back in early November, but then the person who took them ended up taking them down because they sold out to a tabloid, even though they’d already posted them. Yeah, made no sense to me either. But that’s what happened.

-The other thing I found funny about this overnight was the fact that even before the first episode aired, during one of their promos they ran in December (Christmas Eve to be exact), they showed the shot of Ben kissing Caila on the bed with the fireworks going off in the background, which I tweeted about the second I saw it.

So hey, you may not even need me anymore considering this show basically spoils itself if you look hard enough. Also, they’ve only done this the past two seasons, but have you noticed we’re getting the post-coitus morning after scene with the lead and the person they just knocked boots with? Allegedly. Yeah, because every first time sex you have with someone is followed by you serving them breakfast in bed the next morning. How about something more realistic? You know, maybe Ben trying to scurry out without waking Caila up, then once she finally gets up and sees that he ditched her, she runs to the bathroom crying, takes her pill she forgot to take the night before, then sobs uncontrollably into a pillow. Yeah, that’s more like it. This “let me feed you some grapes you princess of a woman thing” isn’t quite what happens in the dating world, unfortunately. No wonder these people get so brainwashed on the show.

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25 Comments

25 Comments

  1. rob22

    March 1, 2016 at 10:03 AM

    Someone let me know what they thought of RS’s blog. Since the site is so jumpy I couldn’t even read it. But since the episode was pretty boilerplate and predictable, except for the two I Love You’s that wafted out of Smilin Pete’s pie hole, I’m sure that’s the centerpiece this week.

  2. jessicat

    March 1, 2016 at 10:20 AM

    The order of the dates went Caila, Jojo, then Lauren. I’m not sure why Steve forgot that and went on about how Ben told JoJo he loved her AFTER he told Lauren the same thing. He forgot that the date order is shown differently when they air it

  3. lissylou

    March 1, 2016 at 11:52 AM

    I pretty much have a migraine after trying to read that. Why is it jumping around so much? Hurts my eyes!

  4. mellie3

    March 1, 2016 at 12:04 PM

    This killed my eyes, but I kept reading…I hope it gets resolved soon!

  5. keke1381

    March 1, 2016 at 12:37 PM

    Jessicat you are incorrect. The order of the fantasy sweet dates was Caila, Lauren, and last was JoJo. Steve is correct. Funny that you tried to correct him though. Haha. Anyways, I think the Bachelorette will either be Jubuliee or Caila, as the show has already expressed that the next lead will be more diverse. I think it should be JoJo but unlikely since she ended up in the final two. Definitely do not think it should be Becca!!!

  6. jessicat

    March 1, 2016 at 12:51 PM

    keke, you obviously didn’t understand my comment. They AIRED the dates in the order that you mentioned, but when they actually FILMED the overnights they went Caila, Jojo and then Lauren. That’s what I was referring to. So in reality, Ben said he loved Jojo first, and then told Lauren the same thing.

  7. scarlett1

    March 1, 2016 at 1:25 PM

    Jessicat is correct. The dates were aired out of order from how they were filmed. The site is pratically un-readable between the snail- pace and jumping. Please get this fixed Steve. As is= waste of time!

  8. thebethness

    March 1, 2016 at 1:32 PM

    But Jessicat, I just watched it and I saw the order! LOL, I kid, I kid. I did find it funny that at the beginning of Lauren’s date Ben was saying in his ITM how he just came off a great overnight with Caila. I wonder if that was recorded later, or if they know at the time that they will show them out of order.

  9. kwilson1101

    March 1, 2016 at 1:55 PM

    I’d pay to see footage of Caila destroying that toy house she and Ben built on her hometown date. I’m guessing she’s not going to be hanging onto it now.

  10. iampunka

    March 1, 2016 at 1:56 PM

    Should have picked JoJo. She has a certain something unique going on, and Lauren is just another average peroxide blonde. Plus, Ben is himself with her most, which is huge in a relationship.

  11. kimmyfromdablock

    March 1, 2016 at 2:00 PM

    I really hope Caila is not the next Bachelorette. I find her super annoying and just way too young. She doesn’t seem mature enough for marriage on any level (not that it matters). JoJo is the only worthwhile pick. Jubilee…..is too ghetto (and I mean that in the nicest, non-racist way).

  12. thebethness

    March 1, 2016 at 2:02 PM

    Lauren reminds me of Carly Waddell, but way less annoying and insecure, obviously. Just the way she talks and articulates things, combined with her look. Jojo is awesome, but I think she would eat Ben alive if he didn’t have the upper hand of being The Bachelor. She seems “older”, not in years or looks but life/love/dating experience.

  13. leeroyjenkins

    March 1, 2016 at 2:04 PM

    Actually, when Bevin told Andy Baldwin that she loved him, he said it back. Then he picked Tessa, go figure.

  14. rob22

    March 1, 2016 at 2:23 PM

    @thebethness: I did notice that there were a lot of voiceovers that seemed to have been dubbed later. I know they do that, and you can kind of tell when they sound like they’re being read and strongly backup a narrative that they’re trying to push…. especially anything that might confuse viewers into thinking that Smilin Pete is torn about who he’s going to pick. I agree with RS that the “I Love You” thing with JoJo seemed kinda off. I saw a physical attraction, but not the emotional investment that he’s having, and the show is not hiding, with Lauren. In short, the JoJo I love you felt like, as RS noted, it was Producer driven or suggested. Maybe they ran a subliminal message into his bedroom at night. 🙂 Nice catch by jessicat that the scenes were out of order with JoJo’s date actually being before Lauren’s date (are these really dates? They seem more like scenes). Though the order muddies the waters, I have to imagine the Producers already knew that Smilin Pete was in love with Lauren (“show” love, of course, they’ve spent a total of 2 actual days together). So, even with JoJo going first, they still could have pushed the I Love You to happen knowing it was coming on Lauren’s date.

    It’s kind of sick how we watch this show these days, but it’s also kind of fun. We can really start to pick out all the quick jump cuts with a voice over kind of squeezed in and say, hey, that seemed dubbed. Wait a minute. Or whoa, that sounded like it was being read off a script in a dull monotone & was maybe added later. Everyone is getting really good at seeing that stuff now.

  15. justforfun

    March 1, 2016 at 3:13 PM

    I didn’t think it was possible for this site to get any worse, but it is now unreadable with the page jumping around. Fix your site RS!!!!

  16. LynnS

    March 1, 2016 at 3:58 PM

    This site got so bad for me that I couldn’t read it anymore. The pages were constantly reloading and the ads were ridiculous. Scrolling down the page was near impossible.

    About a year ago, I got an ad blocker (they’re free). Now there are no ads, and the pages never need to reload. It is fast the way a web page should be.

  17. cjscjs711

    March 1, 2016 at 10:07 PM

    @LynnS Same here, with the ad blocker. No problems ever since, including today. None whatsoever.

    I think Joelle would have been a better mate for him than Lauren, but what does it matter what we think. Lauren does seem like the typical generic blonde with a very flat near-emotionless delivery of her words, but Ben must see a lot more in her than we do.

    I’m fine with Caila as Bachelorette. Our bunch has gotten a little jaded over time on this series, but I was watching with the gals at the gym, and they just couldn’t stop their tears from flowing all over the place during the Caila rejection.

  18. sleeprgirl

    March 1, 2016 at 10:19 PM

    I am a steady fan of The Bachelor, but I wish it was a bit more seamless in the scripted arena. Not sure why that is with such a large staff/crew. I know it isn’t 48 hours or 60 minutes, but not all the viewers are bored, dumb blonde housewives.

    The rose ceremony was so uncomfortable to watch. Since they were trying to mix it up this season, why not just go to Jojo and Lauren’s rooms individually and ask them to “accept this rose”. Putting them together at that point…was pointless. The entire 2 hours was weird.

    I predicted on twitter 4-5weeks ago that both Jojo and Lauren would go to the end. Logical. Gilligan’s island. Lauren is Mary Ann and Jojo is Ginger.

    Caila is pretty but so insecure (runs her hands thru her hair every 2 seconds) and can not express herself verbally. Her one on one w/Ben proved in my eyes. She made NO sense at all. How could she carry an entire show? That would be very difficult for the producers to pull off. Jojo is gorgeous, already successful and confident. As a previous comment said, mature for her age. She can handle the entirety of a huge show. She and her family has dealt with reality TV and be able to handle 28 men. Caila has already professed that she has a rigid shell in her few words.

    Jubilee is beautiful, but she makes Lace and Olivia look emotionally sound. I understand the need for diversity, but there should be tons of women out there that could take on the role of The Bachelorette.

    The executives of the show have got to do better than some of this amateur-ish work, as viewers will begin to loose interest. I do love the post bachelor show. It was fun, and gave us insight to the weeks show and to the girls themself. It would be interesting to have someone like Emily to come on the after show each week and give a short editorial of her perspective as they have done with a first season wife from Married at First Sight. Change things up a bit.

    I do love seeing beautiful clothing, great hair and makeup, romantic hotspots. They have that going for them. They just need to step up their night time slot instead of it seeming like a bad daytime soap opera.

  19. duckquack

    March 2, 2016 at 2:29 AM

    Steve you will be bored reading her book, it’s all about finding God….sure Jef and Brad are mentioned but it’s an old story and nothing you have not read already…
    plain and simple her book sucks big time.

  20. product19

    March 2, 2016 at 6:29 AM

    Is it just me or is Donald Trump running for president with the same motivation as people appearing on this show? “Are you here for the right reasons” Trump?

  21. rob22

    March 2, 2016 at 8:30 AM

    I agree with the point that Caila is not looking good for The Bachelorette. Unless the show is embracing painful silences as a new and exciting entertainment tool, I don’t see how she can pull it off.

    I also have to agree that JoJo is really the only viable candidate on the current show. Although there are certainly some logistical challenges in making it happen, the show could overcome those challenges if they want. I would think that having a good lead is more important than the schedule convenience of using an F3 or F4 contestant.

  22. elevenly

    March 2, 2016 at 9:04 AM

    Anyone else notice that while Caila was making crying/weeping sounds, sniffling, wrenching her face in pain…her eyes stayed completely dry?
    I don’t think I saw one actual tear.
    I’m not saying she needs to cry…but it felt very theatrical.

  23. kdtx

    March 2, 2016 at 12:01 PM

    When Caila got out of the car to talk more with Ben after she was dumped, she was actually asking “Did you know how you felt about me BEFORE we slept together?” She was making sure he wasn’t being a jerk by waiting until after she’d slept with him to break up with her.

  24. sayywhat

    March 2, 2016 at 12:24 PM

    I’m pretty sure the order of the fantasy suites was Caila, Jojo, and then Lauren. Ashley I wrote in her cosmo recap this week: “The last date of the week is with JoJo, but for the sake of accuracy (I know, it’s reality TV but I’m a truth-bringer), JoJo’s date came in the middle of this week’s outings IRL, and this episode’s edit pieced things together out of sequence.” If the storyline that Ben loved two women was planned out early on, as RS speculates, then it wouldn’t really matter that he (obviously) loves Lauren more – he could’ve told Jojo first.

  25. hurricaneemily

    March 2, 2016 at 6:01 PM

    Hey, Steve.

    Great recap as always.

    You can check out my recap for episode 9 here: http://cafeemily.com/bachelor-2016-episode-9-recap/

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