Reality Steve

Dr. Reality Steve

“Reader Emails,” “Dr. Reality Steve,” BIP Cast Announcement & Next Week’s Column

Photo Credit: ABC

So yesterday it became “official” when People announced a partial “Bachelor in Paradise” cast list. Mind you, every name they gave were names I’ve given you in the past week, yet no credit given. You might ask, “Steve, why do you keep mentioning them not crediting you? They never do.” Oh I but I beg to differ. In fact, it was exactly one week ago today that People pulled their heads out of their asses and finally credited me with a story that they ran, which was the one about Chad buying domain names. Which is why it’s so infuriating. When ABC releases their cast photos and bios every season, do I ever give them crap for not crediting me? Of course not. Because they don’t mention me. Ever. But for People to have no problem mentioning a story I broke last week, but then turn right around a week later and pretend that all these contestants weren’t already spoiled is laughable. Either never credit me, or do it on every story where I’ve printed something before you do. Picking and choosing is 100x worse than just never mentioning me. So yeah, it has much more to do with the fact that they HAVE credited me in the most recent past, but then won’t on something as obvious as this.

With no new episode next week due to the NBA Finals, there will still be a column up on Tuesday that, shall we say, should be some recommended reading. Lets dive into the previous dating lives of Grant Kemp and Jordan Rodgers, shall we? What a couple of doozies. Join me Tuesday for what should be your most entertaining read of the season. Scandalous? Eh, depends on how you want to look at it. I get stuff every season on contestants. But outside of Arie, I’ve never gotten so many detailed stories from past women than I have about Grant and Jordan. And hey, there’s still a few more days before Tuesday rolls around, anyone else got any more stories they want to share about these two dogs? I’m all for it. You know where to email me.

No live video chat tonight. It will return next week. Until then, enjoy your “Reader Emails” and “Dr. Reality Steve” today. See you Tuesday.


Hi Steve,

Happy birthday!!!

A few questions/comment….

1. I’m glad we will finally be done with Chad next week, it was funny to see him be such a douche at first but I think they overdid it with the editing of him saying crappy things every other minute. Since he’s only leaving in episode 4, any idea if there will be a new villain? I can’t imagine the producers won’t try to create more drama. No, there won’t be. Unless you consider Jordan and Robby’s ex-girlfriends being brought up makes them villains. But in terms of one in the house that none of the guys like? No. Chad won that award.

2. It seems the initial cast of bip from bens girls are all pretty much friends… Pics together on ig etc. who do u see starting the drama? Leah? Lace? It’s impossible to predict who it’ll be. But there will always be drama.

3. Thanks for recommending unreal! After seeing mention of it on ur site multiple times I binge watched the season and loved it! Can’t wait for season 2!

Love ur site!


Comment: Episode 1 was really good I thought. Episode 2 is just as good.

Hey Steve, two questions! Any talk of JJ Lane heading to BIP? I’ve definitely seen him tweet before saying if Amanda Stanton was going he would definitely be interested. And since you said she is….? I haven’t heard that JJ is going on this season.

Also the season preview seems to allude to Jordan’s reputation as well as Robby’s, what happens that makes them become the final two plus JoJo actually picks Jordan? Is she not made aware of his reputation? Luke seemed like the best choice to be honest.It’s addressed next episode. But obviously she’s turned a blind eye to it, or as the US Weekly article states, she’s “indifferent” about it. Yeah, after describing the relationship she had with her ex Chad and his cheating ways, for her to be “indifferent” about Jordan’s past (and this is only the beginning mind you), seems pretty naïve to me.

PS The Lacy/Marcus thing is so weird, I get they were never legally married but are they even together anymore? Thanks for your time!

Comment: Who knows at this point. Certainly doesn’t look like it. And if they are, it’s strictly a business relationship at this point.

Hey Steve,

Long time reader, first time emailing.

So in addition to The Bachelor franchise, Law and Order also happens to be one of my guilty pleasures. Once in a while, a L&O SVU episode will be clearly based on real events but obviously fictionalized (e.g. when SVU did episodes based on Rihanna and Chris Brown, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, etc.)

Last month, SVU aired an episode titled “Assaulting Reality”, where a contestant on a reality TV show that was strikingly similar to the Bachelor was sexually assaulted on TV. As it turns out, the producers knew and basically hid the evidence to spin the story in a different way. Just wondering if this was something that Dick Wolf completely dreamed up on his own or if allegations of anything similar has ever happened on The Bachelor/ Bachelorette/ Bachelor Pad.

Anyways, I love your site!


Comment: Plenty of people have emailed me about this episode. Don’t watch the show. Never saw it.

As sick as the producers are in this franchise, I highly doubt they ever covered up a sexual assault.


Really enjoy your columns, and by any chance have you been watching real housewives of Dallas?, just curious since you live in Dallas.

If so, would love to hear your opinions

Comment: I saw the first 3 episodes. Haven’t seen any since and still have them saved. Maybe I’ll get around to watching them at some point. It’s the first Housewives franchise I’ve ever watched 5 minutes of. I don’t know, I just can’t get into that. It’s just so fake and not really all that interesting. Then again, that show was not supposed to be a Housewives franchise. It was just about Dallas women and the charity world. But they decided to make it a Housewives. So who knows if they get picked up for season 2 if those women come back. I highly doubt the cast will be exactly the same. They’ll bring some new women in.

Hi Steve,

I was reading through your latest “Readers Emails” and noticed some talk about next seasons Bachelor. I understand you said most are chosen from the top 4 and only two bachelors have been chosen who were not in the top 4. Here’s the thing, Jojo and her obsession with “bad boys” leaves for the most boring final four ever. Chase and Luke are cute but have absolutely no personality and I don’t see them becoming a fan favorite for anything other than their looks… which doesn’t sound like enough to form a new likeable bachelor for next season.

Do you think it’s possible Wells or James T could be chosen for next seasons Bachelor? From what I can tell, they are the only well-liked contestants of this season who don’t have a cheating accusation behind them. I just don’t think I could see Chase or Luke being next seasons bachelor.

Thanks.. Keep up the great work Steve!

Comment: Anything’s possible. But will they be? No.

Hey Steve –

Happy almost Friday!

I have a random question about Andi, Kelly, and Nikki. It seems that the three of them used to all hang out and be friends, right after Andi’s breakup with Josh. But now it seems that Nikki and Andi never post about one another, although it appears Andi is in Nikki’s wedding. Do you know of anything about their relationships – do Kelly and Nikki not get along? Are Andi and Nikki not really friends anymore despite Nikki posting that Andi is a bridesmaid in her wedding?

Comment: I honestly have no idea about that triangle of friends. Your guess is as good as mine.

HI Steve,

This is in response to a reader email talking about bachelottes’ not wearing seat beats. Classic cars rarely have any more than a lap belt, especially if they are convertible and if they are considered ‘original’. Shoulder belts were an option around the mid 1970’s. Most of the cars they have shown are older than that.

Thanks for your great work !

Comment: Well there you go. Makes sense.

Hi Steve,

I have watched The Bachelor franchise on and off for years. Thanks for all your hard work spoiling. In last week’s “Reader Emails” section, you mention that Lacy and Marcus were not really married. I did not watch their seasons as contestants or their season of BIP so I do not know their back-story, but your answer got me wondering. As a skeptical viewer of Bachelor/Bachelorette and someone who loved unReal when it came out, I am not under the assumption that much of what I am watching is aired as it happened. I guess I gave the show too much credit for assuming their televised weddings were real.

My questions is: which of the bachelor/bachelorette marriages are real? Are Jade/Tanner, Ashley/JP, Catherine/Sean, Molly/Jason etc. legally married?


Comment: Yes, all those couples are. Marcus and Lacy’s “wedding” in Mexico last season for BIP was just for show. There was no wedding license. The plan was once they got back to the states, they’d eventually have a real wedding with family and friends and get legally married. That’s yet to happen.

Hey Steve,

So I read the article you tweeted talking about “Coupled” and I was curious so I started reading about it, which led to binge-ing all three episodes in one sitting…

Safe to say I’m hooked. I love how real all the girls are (having jobs like “CEO” and “attorney”!!) and the guys seems very genuine so far! But I can’t tell if it’s “Bachelor”-genuine or like actually genuine. Have you seen any episodes? What’s your take?

I guess it’s still reality television, and people applying obviously might have other motives, but it’s really refreshing to see girls and guys of all types on the show (curvy, skinny, tall, short, tons of different ethnicities etc). The format is also refreshing, where there will likely be equal numbers of guys and girls in the end.

The one thing I don’t like is how awkward it gets when the guy picks two girls. It’s like a 2-on-1 every episode – so uncomfortable.

Anyway I was just wondering if you’ve seen some episodes and what you think about how genuine the show is and whether it’ll last.


Comment: I saw the first episode and couldn’t get into it. Haven’t watched since. I have one of the episodes recorded, but I’m behind. Doubt I’ll watch.

Hi Steve,

Started following your site during Ben’s season and I’m absolutely loving the spoilers and recaps. Definitely gives a great perspective to watch the show from. A great reminder that this is still TV and can’t be taken so seriously.

Three questions-

First, I’m sure you may have previously answered this question, but how does pay work on BIP? It varies. Some get paid per day they are there, some get paid per episode they’re on, and some get paid a flat rate (usually alumni).

Secondly, in terms of cheating and having/not having a girlfriend or boyfriend, do you think contestants aren’t totally truthful or is it more of producers just ignoring that part? I really don’t think producers care.

Third, have you heard anything on upcoming seasons of survivor? One of my former teachers knows a former cast member and said they had been speaking to her about doing another former players season sometime soon. True?

Comment: Yes, season 34 is all former players, some of which being former winners. Here’s the details of the season.

OMG just realized Evan IS Kip from Napoleon Dynamite. Looks and mannerisms!

Comment: I don’t really see it other than the hair.

Hey Steve! I love your site! I took your advice and watched the whole first season of UNreal over the weekend so I can be caught up with season 2. Totally worth it because I loved it!!! Thank you!!

One question? So the people you said we’re going to be on BIP that are still snap chatting I guess are not in the main cast? Caila and Laurn H. are still snap chatting so I guess they come on later??

Comment: Caila is not doing the show. Lauren Himle is. She’ll be showing up later.

So I’m a bit conflicted on this Chad situation. I’ve got no doubt he’s an uber douche, but he’s also surrounded by douche bags. I definitely feel like he’s a bit roided out, but are they playing up the security aspect? Is there always security around but they don’t video it, or did they specifically bring in security to keep an eye on Chad?

Thank you for all your spoilers. You make watching this show tolerable!

Comment: Of course they are. It’s a television show. There’s security always on set. But following a contestant around? Please.

Now that you have seen the whole episode play out, do you think Chad is still playing a role for the show or this is how he is? I’m certainly no expert on spotting a physical abuser but if this is how he is when the cameras are rolling, I would hate to see how he is off camera. I just don’t see how he could be willingly portraying himself like this if he was doing it for attention. I don’t even see a lot of crazy editing done. With that being said, if Chad had made it further along and was close to being chosen do you think the producers would have persuaded Jo Jo to choose someone else? Wouldn’t it hurt the franchise if someone like him with violent tendencies was the final one? To me this is him because he’s not backing down from it on social media. Buying domain names, trolling everyone who questions him, relishing the villain role, etc. He just wants attention.

When Evan came to Chris Harrison and told him about Chad, how genuine was that? I mean did he have to first go find a producer, tell the producer what he wanted to talk to Chris about, the producer give him some feedback or tips, and then the producer talk to Chris about what to say back or do you think it was all being captured for the first time as we saw it?

Comment: Of course it was producer driven.

Few questions for you…( I apologize for the amount of questions, with the live chats not returning for over another week I decided to ask them thru here instead.)

1. I remember before Jordan’s hometown you had said that Aaron would not being there filming but I then remember people saying that they had spotted Aaron in the same area around the time Jordan filmed his hometown date. Did you ever find out if Aaron was filmed during Jordan’s hometown or not? Aaron is not on the hometown date.

2. I know rumors were swirling about Calia being on a contestant on Bachelor in paradise but you then said you heard she wasn’t. Is it a for sure thing she won’t be on there? Yes, she won’t be on it unless they do some serious convincing. But she initially was gonna do it then had a change of heart. So I guess it’s possible she can change her mind, but I’d be surprised.

3. Being Chad leaves next episode is there another “villain” or someone who causes issues after he leaves? I just feel usually the villain sticks around a little longer? No.

4. You said Jordan and JOJO were in somewhat of contact before the show even aired, do you know who it was that reached out to the other first. Did Jordan reach out to her? No idea.

5. I know people sent you bits and pieces from Andi’s book but did you ever actually read the whole book? I find it very funny that when Nick asked her the famous question, “If you weren’t in love with me why did you make love to me”, she became very angry and defensive saying that is something that should only be between them but in her book she not only talks about having sex with both Josh and Nick but she even goes as far as saying sex with Nick wasn’t good and she went into details of what he said to her during sex.. Like wtf?! Keeping it between them my ass. No, haven’t read it. But yeah, I’ve heard Andi has said some very hypocritical things in the book.

I also want to take a minute to tell you I absolutely love how faithful you are to your sources or even a random stranger. Even though all your readers would love to hear how you get spoilers, from whom, why you get them
and blah blah blah. But the fact you never out them, and always ask permission whenever you will make something (ex. Grants ex girlfriends friend email) public is amazing to me. So thank you again.

Comment: Thank you. Going through that right now with the Jordan stuff. I think it’s gonna happen. Just with no names. Gonna leave those out because as of now, they don’t want their names out there. But assuming Jordan reads it, or it gets back to him, he’ll know exactly who emailed me.

Hi Steve,

I went to HS with Chad, but the only thing I can remember about him was that he wanted everyone to call him and referred to himself as “The Chad”. He was not very memorable in HS so maybe he is tying to make up for it now. PSA: That is not how normal people from Oklahoma act.

Comment: Anyone who wants you to refer to them in the third person is a complete ass hat. You know, like that Dr. Reality Steve guy.

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  1. rob22

    June 9, 2016 at 9:25 AM

    An old fan: the only way I’ve seen “my BFs family hates me” work, is if your BF is willing to keep a distance from his family. If he takes your side, digs in and lets his family know that if they treat you poorly, he will have to see them much less frequently & even then for very brief amounts of time (i.e. 2 hours for Christmas dinner & then gone). And then actually do it. I’ve seen families where their behavior improved after this approach, and where it hasn’t & the couple pretty much cut off most contact. Both scenarios will still work, though it will be sad that the family can’t pull it together & play nice. There is some lamenting that goes on when that happens, but it is what it is & the marriage is OK because the husband is supporting his #1. His wife.

    Otherwise, if he wants a frequent relationship with them & they’re not willing to be nice to you, then there will be tons of drama. It will create a major issue in your marriage. You will feel disrespected by them & angry at your husband for not supporting you. The feeling will be very close to the feeling of being cheated on. Marriages really don’t need major issues of any kind as it’s hard enough to just get along without external negative influences. So, this depends on your future husband’s willingness to take a VERY strong stand in supporting you & create space between them and the two of you if they don’t lighten up. Yes, he does need to choose between you and his family. You have to be #1 & he flexes to them depending on how they treat you.

    So another FWB girl too. Such a deal being a guy who works and has his sex toy show up at work for a nice snack. It’s good work if you can get it. Sounds like he’s a busy guy & as long as he gets room service, I’m sure it will impact his desire to go out and find a real girlfriend. Until he reaches the point where he wants more. Then he’ll dump you like a worn out couch. If you’re OK with that scenario, then fine, though I can’t imagine WHY you would be fine with it.

    Just remember, time passes quickly. Some day you’ll view this episode as a HUGE waste of your time that prevented you from finding something better. We often look back and kick ourselves over dumb decisions, so if you can cut this one short, you’ll at least be able to say it’s was a very short waste of time. You probably will laugh at yourself about it if you cut it off now. If it stretches out longer, you probably won’t be laughing about it much later.

    Just remember: if guys are really into you, they’ll want to be with you regularly for more than sex. The relationship will progress, get more serious & progress obviously towards marriage within a couple of years, or so. If a guy doesn’t have a girl like that in their lives, they will easily accept a warm place to put it. That’s what you are to him. And you deliver! Such a deal. Just once I’d like someone to write, “I have his guy who I have sex with for no good reason other than just to have sex. It’s not going anywhere, but I don’t care. I’m just bored & don’t give a crap about finding another relationship, getting married or having kids right now. I’m good with things as they are. Just writing to say hi!” That’s what the guy would write if he was being honest. So at least you’d be on the same page.

  2. justa_viewer

    June 9, 2016 at 2:14 PM

    To the person (I assume it’s a woman) who is getting back out into the dating scene…I think it’s a terrible idea to have a stranger, whom you met through a dating app, pick you up. I’ve watched enough Forensic Files/Dateline NBC/misc cop shows to know that you don’t just get into a car with a guy you barely know, and who was not introduced to you by someone you trust–no matter how charming or cute he seems to be online.

    Better: Arrange to meet him in a restaurant where there will be other folks (in case he turns out to be creepy, comes on too strong, or is just batsh** crazy). Have a friend or taxicab drive you there ahead of time. Make sure you also have a friend or taxi lined up to take you home. Do not let him drive you (for the same reason you should not have him pick you up).

    If you both seem to hit it off and plan to meet for another date, that’s when you can decide if you’ll be comfortable with him picking you up next time. And while you’re thinking about that, hop on the Internet and do a background check on this guy.

  3. cjscjs711

    June 9, 2016 at 4:31 PM

    To the gal meeting the new guy – make sure the place you pick out is one you can easily get to and from without depending on him for a ride. Coffee or lunch would be better than drinks and dinner, unless you think you’ll really hit it off.

    Difficulties with in-laws can range from uncomfortable to horrible. You are best off talking to your BF about your concerns.

    The guy who continually meets you in the office. It has a secretive look to it. Why never a real date? Never a visit to his home, or did I miss that? The trying to make him jealous to figure out what’s in his head is silly. Being more direct in your relationship will be much healthier. It sounds like you don’t really know much about his life.

    Speaking of direct, in Chad’s Match profile I’d say he is unnecessarily direct. Is he the only person you know who, when asked a question online by someone they’re not interested in, doesn’t respond? When social media first began, I would answer random dudes who didn’t interest me with a “No thank you,” response. Now I just don’t answer. Does that make me arrogant? On the contrary, I think it is a very typical response nowadays. In fact, to put it in writing is strange more so than the action itself is strange. Same with putting into words if not fit and attractive, you’ll be friends not a date. Most people do like feeling attracted physically to the person they want to get serious about and have sex with.

    Suing Chad over use of and Another silly idea. Whatever happened to just asking someone, “Why are you using my name? I don’t care, but I’m just curious.” Our society has become so litigious. We’ll also call the police to intervene before we’ll just talk to our neighbor about loud partying for example. I looked at where Chad redirects to. It’s his personal Instagram site. And he’s doing nothing – that I could see – to make money, make a profit, show any kind of bad faith (his Instagram site is not about you, Steve, it is about himself what a surprise). Furthermore, you don’t want to use it so he’s not preventing you from doing anything you otherwise wanted to do. So what would your damages be, Steve? How much would a judge award you for someone using your name and doing nothing with it? Yes your “Reality Steve” is trademarked since 2011 – not a long time; how strong a mark is it? This would also figure in any judicial decision. But again, what are your damages? Is his use of your mark creating confusion among your potential readers and taking away click income from you? I know I’m not confused. I know which is which. But I’m not a lawyer. To really know the answer, pay one a couple hundred and get a definitive answer. JMA

  4. canon

    June 10, 2016 at 5:59 PM

    Been meaning to tell you this, but your site has gotten nearly impossible to view. Stuff constantly popping up, right when you try to click something a box pops up which snatches your click and takes you elsewhere and the video in the corner makes typing difficult and slow. I constantly have to wait for my typing to show up on the screen before continuing so it takes a LONG time to post a comment. I hope you can fix this because it makes your site so hard to view it’s almost not worth coming here anymore and that would be a shame! Can you make it less frustating?

  5. cjscjs711

    June 11, 2016 at 1:18 PM

    Two things I have found to help. 1) Try using a different browser. Google Chrome seems to be working pretty well. 2) Try using different ad-block software. I use Ad Block Plus on all my devices and it works very well. I use the free version and it works fine. Everything loads fast and (the content I want loads fast, not the ads) I’m not interrupted with all kinds of popups I don’t want. On the other hand, our public library’s ad-block software is apparently not as good. I can see on the status line all the ads it’s closing and not opening for me – just one after another until the site times out, without reaching the point of showing me the page. I’m on a library computer right now and the site kept timing out.

    Sometimes also closing the window that’s having trouble and opening a new window to load the site helps. This time today it didn’t help, but when I opened the Chrome browser, as you can see, I was able to soon get to where I intended. (I can see in the status line it’s still closing ads but is doing so in the background. Chrome doesn’t make me wait while it closes ads.)

    Steve is not going to stop having ads. But if you find an ad is infecting your computer with viruses, he will try to do his best to do something about that advertiser. Macs seem to be harder to infect, but nonetheless there was one one ad that infected my Mac with a popup for a ‘Mac Cleaner’ of some sort, having a window impossible to close, impossible to delete, and I wrote Steve and he did something about that. I then Googled how to get the virus off my computer and haven’t had it since. (Knock on wood.) He has said he can’t control what his advertisers plan on doing. Only after the fact.

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