Back at the house, it’s Asaf to the rescue. He tells Gio that he might not have meant to be hurtful, but he has been. Like an adult, Gio approaches Kaylen and the two finally have a calm conversation about how they can be peaceful and kind to one another moving forward and I’m extremely relieved that no further plasma will be shed. The next day is the very last Challenge. It’s relatively uneventful, except for John raging that he doesn’t want to go on a date with Nicole and he doesn’t care about anything besides the money at this point. Oh, and Victoria appears to consider flinging herself off a cliff because not only does Julia get all the attention from men, but she gets all the dates as well.
In a quiet moment later on, Kaylen tells Asaf that his unrelenting optimism makes her think they might be a Match. He gets what she’s saying, but he’s considering going with his heart instead of with calculated logic. Besides, Francesca doesn’t wear underwear, not ever! Could there be a more powerful connection between two people? Oh, there can be? Well, let’s all just agree to overlook that for now.
On the Getaway Date, Julia finally masters how to ride a bike while John mutters nasty words about her under his breath like he just came down with Tourette’s. Julia and Cam sit down and have a really nice time together. Meanwhile, Nicole gets to listen to John admit he’s an assh*le – but not an explosive assh*le, so stop being silly – and that none of this is worth his energy. Besides, he’s annoyed that Victoria is probably his Match and how could that even be when she’s so pessimistic? (I feel like I don’t really need to write a punchline here so I won’t.) Finally having enough, Nicole breaks free and joins Julia and Cam to escape. Wanting to be a decent human being, Julia approaches John and he responds like the assh*le he already admitted he is.
It’s Julia and Cam who are voted into the final Truth Booth of the season and it turns out these two sweet people are totally a Perfect Match! Sure, they spent no actual time together in that house and Julia will roll around with Stephen later, but for now everyone is thrilled. Well, everyone besides Victoria who, through the process of elimination, realizes John is her Match. When she tells him of her suspicions and that she’s disappointed because he’s not the kind of guy she asked for, he calls her fat. He later admits he acts like an assh*le so he doesn’t have to open up and potentially get hurt. Then he pulls Victoria aside, tells her she’s beautiful, and pushes her up against a counter and starts tonging her in front of a crowd. I’d call the whole thing sweet, but I can’t accurately describe it because my eyes started bleeding.
And now it’s time for the final Match-Up Ceremony. Morgan – in a snazzy bowtie – is first and he chooses Tori. John is up next. He apologizes to Nicole for being a jerk on the date and then picks Victoria. Tyler selects Camille – who still won’t have sex with him. Asaf and his suspenders are up next and he’s struggling. Should he choose Francesca, who his heart (and his penis) wants him to pick, or will he go with the strategic choice of Kaylen? He finally settles on Kaylen; after all, he can be with Francesca later. Stephen selects Nicole, Gio ends up with Francesca, and now it’s time to see whether or not they will be the first cast to fail or if they will walk away winners. With four Perfect Matches already confirmed, they only need six more to win – and they actually do it!
This group is $750,000 richer than they were before they arrived in Maui. Some of the contestants appear to have learned very valuable things about themselves and some have even found true love. I truly wish them all the best. I hope they grow from this experience and I thank all of you who have read my recaps along the way. And now I’m going to go spray some champagne on myself and punch a wall to celebrate their impressive victory.
Nell Kalter teaches Film and Media at a school in New York. She is the author of the books THAT YEAR and STUDENT, both available on amazon.com in paperback and for your Kindle. Also be sure to check out her website at nellkalter.com. Her twitter is @nell_kalter.