The short version of the breakup was when they were in Tokyo, Matt and Rachel, Matt has had me blocked probably five years. I didn’t know that until this breakup happened. He’s had me blocked. So I’ve never seen his Instagram feed.
I follow Rachel and I did notice. Yes. Every time Matt and Rachel are out, they’re always Instagramming and putting on their stories about food. And this is, I guess, Matt’s job. Or he just likes doing it anyway, they’re in Tokyo and it was Rachel’s job, I guess, on that trip to find a place to eat so they could go and document it because that’s what they did as a couple, constantly telling everybody and linking to food that they were eating.
She was having a rough day. She said she was on her period. She was having a hard time finding a restaurant in Tokyo. She finally found one and it just wasn’t very good. Kind of bombed. And because she was on her period, she was having a bad week. She said she was very emotional. She started crying. They didn’t really talk to each other at dinner and she felt a little overwhelmed and she was putting so much pressure on herself to find a good spot there.
And she said, that’s kind of where. Things got a little weird and he was being very dismissive saying it’s not a big deal you know, pick some place. But then once they got there and she picked it and it didn’t work out, he was just kind of like, why are you crying? Why are you so upset about this? And it was just kind of whatever she said.
It wasn’t a very pleasant night. They just basically didn’t talk to each other over dinner and didn’t even talk on the way back home. The next morning they woke up and they woke up and they were fine. And then they just started talking about things and he told her. The qualities in her he worries about as a wife.
And he’s telling her, I should want to propose to you, I don’t feel like I’m ready, I don’t see myself proposing, I can’t see myself married to you, maybe one day I’ll get there, but I don’t feel ready now. And that was basically what they ended. Matt and Rachel broke up over a bad night of food. Obviously there’s more than that, but here’s the thing.
If you watched Rachel’s interview, she got very emotional numerous times during that interview, which I totally understand if you watch the interview and you listened to Rachel’s answers, it is clear as day. That they didn’t break up because she had a bad choice of restaurants that they chose that she chose in Tokyo, for whatever reason, Matt James waited until Tokyo to drop this bomb on her.
This didn’t happen. And because of one instance in Tokyo seems like it was a culmination of things. That he finally just let out. But the frustrating thing, if you’re her or anybody else in this situation is she said days before they were talking about marriage, they’ve talked about kids numerous times, talked about looking at rings.
She said that was a very big thing for him. He was never a guy who really talked about rings. And then he was saying, let’s go look at stuff. And two days later, after a bad night by her, self admittedly. He’s telling her I should want to propose to you, but I don’t feel like I’m ready. I don’t see myself proposing.
I can’t see myself married to you. And he ended it. And here’s the thing the next morning, she was leaving a day earlier than he was. So she goes to the airport, and he never tells her he’s posting what he did on his Instagram caption. She doesn’t hear about it until as she’s taking off, and as she explained in the podcast, for whatever reason, she, because of her phone and a VPN, she never gets Wi Fi on a plane.
So now she’s flying from Tokyo back to Atlanta, and right before she takes off, she sees that he posted that they broke up. With that bizarre Instagram post, and he never gave her a heads up. So now she has to fly, whatever, how many hours, 12, 6, 14, 16, without her phone. Knowing that the second she opens up her phone when she lands in Atlanta, it’s probably loaded with people hitting her up.
And, I think when you watched it and listened to her, maybe you haven’t watched it and you’re just going to listen to the audio of it. You can very much tell that this was the biggest thing that I took from this whole experience and listening to Rachel talk is they were not on equal ground in this relationship.
Unfortunately, Rachel seemed to bend over backwards for a guy and he seemed to take advantage of that because. Every story that she told, it was almost like she felt like she was walking on eggshells around him, and she didn’t want to make him mad. And even when she was mad and wanted to voice something, she was the one that ended up apologizing at the end of whatever mini argument they had.
You can listen to it for yourself. It’s an hour and forty minutes long, but it is clear as day. Matt had the upper hand, that whole relationship, and it seemed like Rachel was doing everything she could to not make him upset, to always try and appease him. And unfortunately that’s just never going to work long term and Alex did a very good job towards the end of the podcast of telling her, look, I understand the position that you’re in right now.
You are two weeks removed from a breakup to somebody you thought you were going to marry and have kids with and start a family with. I get it. You’re still technically kind of in this relationship, but Rachel. You’re going to look back on this six, nine months from now and listen, you might even go back and watch the interview and watch the video and S and realize some of the things that you said, you were just like, probably going to say, oh my gosh, what the fuck was I thinking?
So I totally get where Rachel is coming from. She’s clearly still in that bubble with him. She’s not together with him, obviously. And she absolutely still loves him. And. While she says there’s no way she could see herself getting back together with him, I’m not gonna say I’m ruling it out 100%, I’d probably rule it out 95%.
There’s a part of her that, if Matt James were to literally come groveling back, I don’t know, there is a chance that Rachel could take him back. She says no, but I think a lot of people are just like, girl, separate yourself from him, you’ve got to move on. And that’s the thing here is if I could give any advice to Rachel, clearly I’ve helped her out in the past, didn’t I?
If I could give any advice to Rachel, it would be along the same lines as the advice that Alex gave to her. Rachel, you gotta understand something. You can’t see the forest through the trees right now. And I totally understand. This guy was part of your life. Every single day for four years. But the only way you can move on is to end that cycle.
You can’t have him calling you, texting you, checking in on you. She says she’s heard from him a few times. Every three or four days he’ll check in. She says, no, you don’t have to worry. But that brings her sadness. Totally get it. Anybody in that position would feel sadness. She said there was no cheating that went on.
Probably makes it even tougher. Probably easier if she found out he cheated on her. Then she could just move on and be like, well, screw him. But it’s more along the lines of how he handled it, the things that he said to her, especially the things that he was saying to her just days before he’s then telling her, I don’t see myself proposing to you, I can’t see myself married to you.
I don’t feel ready right now when days before he’s talking about rings and marriage. So this is what I mean. I think Matt James, you know, again, don’t people are going to do what they’re going to do. I would suggest, you know, not blowing him up. He’s probably very well aware of what she said on the interview right now.
Rachel can’t see the forest through the trees, but I’m telling you it’s going to get better. It always does. First off, because Rachel is young, good looking, very smart. She’s going to have her pick of the litter. I, the, the amount of probably celebrities and athletes that have already slid into this woman’s DM are overwhelming.
Hell, they were probably sliding into her DMS while she was still with Matt. She’s not going to have a problem finding a new boyfriend, but it is going to be tough in terms of getting over this heartbreak and the best advice I can give is I understand. You’re feeling that way, but I’m also telling you once you get into a new relationship, you are going to look back on this and be like, why would I have ever wanted to be with somebody who didn’t want to be with me, who literally said things to my face days after he said other things to my face that were very positive that tells me to my face, I should want to propose to you, but I don’t see myself proposing.
I can’t see myself married to you. I understand Rachel has a hard time immediately just taking that and going, well, flipping the switch and being like, well, he doesn’t want to be with me. I don’t want to be with him. See ya. Would want to be a, don’t ever talk to me again. This is somebody that’s been in your life for four years, every single day, your best friend.
I totally get it. I also get the fact, even though she can’t see it right now, that she’s going to look back on this, not even necessarily when she’s in another relationship. She might. She might not get in another relationship for another, I don’t know, year, 18 months, two years. We don’t know, but she’s going to look back on this in six months, nine months and realize whether she’s in a relationship or not and realize, Oh my gosh, why did I let that relationship?
Why did I act that way in that relationship? Why did I let him basically control that relationship? Why was I walking around on eggshells, trying to appease him, trying not to make him upset, constantly apologizing when. I felt like I wasn’t doing anything wrong. So it was really disheartening listening to her because it feels like she did lose herself in that relationship.
She lost a little bit of who she was, and I think she even said at the end of the interview, like, yeah, you know, it’ll be interesting going forward, trying to find out a little bit more about who I am, because I feel like maybe I did give up too much in that relationship, but for Matt, James seemed just a very immature way to handle the breakup.
You don’t say those things two days before and then break up with her. Clearly he broke up with her knowing that she was leaving. Before him on that trip, and she wasn’t gonna have Wi Fi access. He literally posts it knowing probably minutes before her flight takes off. This is what I mean. The whole thing was very immature.
This guy doesn’t seem like he wants to get married anytime soon. You could say, well, maybe it’s Steve, it’s just Rachel. I guess it’s possible, but something tells me he’s got a lot to sort out in his life before he ever settles down with anybody. And if you are the next woman to date Matt James I think you go into it with giant red flags up because of what Rachel said on this podcast.
I think she helped out future women that were ever interested in Matt James and she helped out women who are currently in a situation like this. You know, it’s not easy. I get it, Rachel. I totally understand. I’ve never been in a four year relationship like you. I know how it is when you’re thinking something that bad that happens.
You’re thinking, Oh my gosh, I’m never going to get over this every single day. It gets a little bit better every single day. And then you look back on, you’re like, I remember when that, whatever bad thing happened to me, I remember thinking this is never going to get better and I’m never going to be happy.
And then here I am six, nine months, a year later. And how did I ever think that back then? I’m perfectly fine now. But I get it. She can’t see the forest through the trees right now. We all just pray that she doesn’t take him back. I don’t really think she will, but you can tell that she still has a lot of love in her heart for him.
She’s hurt very, very much by him. And I think what he did in this situation was just not handle it. Very well at all. He handled it very, very immaturely. She did say she forgives him, but she doesn’t think she could ever be with someone who disrespected her at the end of the day. And, the other thing is, once she did this hour and forty minute interview with Call Her Daddy, and everybody, you were reading the chat, and you read the comments underneath, everybody is on Rachel’s side on this, and telling her, Girl, go live your best life.
You can’t have him in your life. Don’t talk to him, lose his phone number. Maybe she doesn’t do that right away. Maybe it will be tough for her to move on and get a clean break. She has to have no contact with him. And I, and I understand how tough that sounds, but that’s the only way she’s going to move on.
Hopefully she does that. It was, it was a really good interview. I thought it was handled really well by Alex, and I think that Alex can emphasize, empathize with, emphasize, empathize with Rachel on this. And I think she, I think she showed a lot of empathy and also gave really good advice. And it’s the same advice.
Like, I’m not going to sit here and say like. I knew I, I knew that it’d give the same advice. You might think I’m just copying what Alex said. I was thinking of this, the whole interview. It’s like, wow, I hear what she’s saying. I hear how hurt she is, but she’ll realize six, nine months, a year down the road.
She’ll be like, oh, I’m fine. It’s just because the state she’s in it’s new. It’s a fresh new wound. It just happened two weeks ago. And somebody that was your best friend and you thought you were going to have a family with is now basically not in your life or needs to not be in your life. So you can move on.
That is not an easy thing to do, especially when it’s also a public relationship that everybody has their two cents about. So Rachel, you’ll be fine. Good interview. I’m glad you went on call her daddy. Like I suggested last week. I’m glad Alex reached out to her. I’m glad they did the interview. It was the perfect platform, 225, 000 people tuning in live, everybody commenting in the chat, including myself once I heard my name, but.
Hey, daddy gang. I love you guys. Follow me on our reality. Steve joined my YouTube channel reality. Steve 24. Hey, if I’m good enough for Alex Cooper to get her spoilers for me, then you are too, daddy gang. Where can I get my daddy gang merch? That’s what I want to know. Anyway, thank you all for listening. I really appreciate it.
Follow me on Apple Podcasts. Also, rate and review, but you gotta hit play. It’s the only way it counts as a download. Come in in an hour from now. The Sports Daily will be up on the other feed. And, coming up In about two hours from now, I’m going to have your reader emails, but in my reader email column on reality, steve.
com, I will also embed the video of the Alex Cooper, Rachel McConnell interview from last night, but I’ll start it right at the 20 minute mark where my name is brought up because that’s the important part is these two. The second biggest podcast platform in the world gave me a shout out two or three different occasions gotta love it Thank you, Alex.
Thank you, Rachel. I appreciate y’all listening. Thank you all for listening and I will talk to you
Send all links and emails to: steve@realitysteve.com. To follow me on Twitter, it’s: www.twitter.com/RealitySteve. Instagram name is RealitySteve, or join my Reality Steve Facebook Fan Page. Talk to you tomorrow.
