Hi Steve,
Since Tayshia is the new bachelorette, do you think Colton’s season will stream somewhere? Thanks
Comment: I thought it was, is it not?
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Hi Steve,
I’m not on social media to talk with others about the Bachelorette, so you’re getting my email since I can’t keep quiet! Clare’s guys really bothered me this last week as she told them she was done and with Dale, and they demanded apologies and, like Blake, complained about all the work they had put in for her (like reading). Clare did not owe those men anything but honesty. It’s her show, her process, and their choice to be there. It’s a strain of toxic masculinity to think that women owe men things, that men are entitled to things from women — time, attention, affection. I wish that kind of crap would get called out more often, especially on shows like this where people are dating.
Comment: Blake came across as a horse’s ass. Andy Dehnar’s RealityBlurred column really broke it down best so I’ll summarize it for you. Blake telling the guys he read about book about dementia and now is disappointed Clare is leaving and he didn’t get to know her is about as self absorbed as you can get. AND it’s clear he only read the book to GET SOMETHING IN RETURN for it, whatever that may be. Bad look all around for him. He made her decision to leave about how HE felt cheated. Uhhhh, ok.
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Hi Steve!
I have a question but no worries if you don’t have any insight. Do you think having a somewhat decent sized social media following is a prerequisite for being cast on the bachelor nowadays? I know a lot of the girls and guys become influencers after the fact but does ABC only look for people who already have decent sized social followings now?
Comment: No. I’m looking at the cast list now for Matt’s season of 43 (not all made the first night) and what their IG follower totals were the day the cast was announced: 10 out of 43 had over 10k followers. That’s nothing. Considering we know how many hundreds of thousands they’ll have by the end of the season if they last long, it proves you don’t need to have many at all to get cast. Most don’t.
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(If this has been addressed before feel free to ignore it… I haven’t been able to read through all the reader email columns yet due to being a junior high/high school football coach’s wife.)
Less question, more thought about the seemingly huge love Clare/hate Clare divide. I have a couple of friends who said they don’t like Clare. However, I asked both of them if they’d watched her since she was on JP’s season and they both said no. So maybe that is part of why she seems more polarizing. Those of us that love her have seen her full journey and understand her decisions. Those that don’t like her don’t have the context that the rest of us do. Thoughts?
Comment: Very possible. I get that she’s not for everyone. Then again, no one is. But it’s a bit extreme to hear some of the things people say. It’s ridiculous and uncalled for. I’d say that about any contestant who receives crazy amounts of hate, not just her.
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Hi Steve,
Huge fan and I’m finally asking a question after following you for several years. Sorry if I’m asking something that’s already been asked.
I swear I remember you saying that they aren’t allowed to call their experience on the show a process and they need to call it a journey.
Claire has repeatedly used the term process this season. What changed? Was her journey so off the rails they were ok with it?
Thank you for all you do!
Comment: I don’t remember ever saying that. Do we hear them call it a journey all the time? Yeah. But I don’t think they aren’t allowed to say process.
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Do you have any intel on Cassie dropping her lawsuit against Colton? I suspect just to get out of the public eye and handle things privately. Have you heard if he paid her off to be quiet?
Comment: No. I haven’t heard anything of the such. But I think it’s safe to assume that whatever agreement they came to probably doesn’t allow him to contact her in any way.
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Thank you for continually offering much needed “what gets left out in the edit” information.
It has really bothered me that Clare has been made out to be the villain of this season when I think she has demonstrated healthier inter-personal relationship skills than any other lead I have seen; I believe the “problem” may have been caused by Clare actually being more motivated to have a healthy relationship than to play the contrived “tv romance” games that is the normal show.
I do not think I’m alone in belief that the franchise shows relationships as a convenient, emotionally manipulative hookup, rather than a life-partner kind of love, for all it’s talk of “journey”. Even the “it’s too fast” criticisms of the men cast this season fall flat if one critically thinks about the limited time and conversation between “contestants” prior to the Neil Lane ring ad portion of the show. Dale had as much time with Clare as a “normal season” winner would have – which is why the ring came came out.
My husband and I normally compare the show to “Cheaters” – saying it’s the before and after of bad relationship decisions. Increasingly, largely due to your blog, I have watched the show not simply for entertainment, but as a snippet of how television edits result in propaganda to promote a particular emotional response in the viewer. We obviously weren’t supposed to like Clare this season; which leads me to:
Prior to “Toxic Bachelor Nation” I had simply been viewing the show as more actors/actresses/people simply in it for 15 minutes of celebrity then anything else; do you think we are all simply enabling toxic bachelor nation by continuing to watch? Is there a remedy?
Comment: I don’t the enabling is bad by watching. The more people that watch the better. The commenting, and harassment, and death threats, and immediately jumping on contestants on their IG or message boards is what’s tearing this show down. It’s unnecessary.
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So, having watched the last episode – it’s very clear that from the beginning, the fix was in for Clare.
When Chris Harrison went to visit her – Clare was surprised to see him – and he went right in with “This isn’t going to end well”… She seemed surprised – and he went in straight for the kill.
Come on – virtually every other lead has had a favourite right from the start as you’ve pointed out – production knows that – and they’ve never tried to intercede like this. Given the Covid protocols, as you’ve said – they would have had Taysha quarantining and on stand by – but some are saying, I’m sure, “Well what if she hadn’t had a front runner?”
My bet is they would have tried a different tack. Like “Clare – you don’t seem to be gelling with anyone – your heart doesn’t seem to be in it – you believe in love at first sight – and that connection you want doesn’t seem to be here”…
So, either way she gets pushed out. They get to cast Taysha, say they are being diverse (they’ve had 20 years – gimme a break) – when really they are just giving Taysha a half assed season. fewer options, and less time. And throwing Clare to the wolves.
Thoughts? The way that Clare is being treated by Toxic Bachelor Nation is pretty appalling.
Comment: Chris’ convo with Clare left a lot to be desired. Granted, we definitely didn’t see the whole thing, but HIM coming at HER with “you know this doesn’t end well for anyone,” and “what do we do,” he’s basically forcing the issue. It’s already planting the answer in her head. Maybe she was all in Dale but doesn’t mean she wanted to stop the show. We’ll never know because Chris never asked her that.
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Hey Steve,
Are you planning to listen to the new pod that Jennie Garth and Tori Spelling are doing where they are watching all 90210 eps? (Sort of similar to what Tara and Sarah did, but they’re not famous and weren’t in the show – so prob diff?) HA. I am so pumped to listen as a fellow 90210 fan. The first ep just came out today and I’m def hooked.
Comment: Yeah I heard about that today and I immediately subscribed. There’s just no way I’ll be able to listen to every episode they do. Impossible. I’ve already got 4-5 sports ones I listen to every week. But I am interested to hear ones here and there.
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Send all links and emails to: steve@realitysteve.com. To follow me on Twitter, it’s: www.twitter.com/RealitySteve. Instagram name is “RealitySteve,” or join my Reality Steve Facebook Fan Page. Talk to you tomorrow.
