Reality Steve

The Bachelor 23 - Colton

The “Bachelor” Colton – Episode 2 Recap, My Podcast Screw Up, & The Return of “Temptation Island” Tonight

Photo Credit: ABC

-We began with Colton doing a selfie video in bed the day of his first group date of the season. I don’t ask for much, but can we please not do this anymore. Is this MTV now? Outside of on the plane once traveling starts, we never see the selfie cams for anything. It added nothing. If instead of a selfie cam, Colton would’ve just done an ITM that morning talking about that day’s date, it would’ve had the exact same effect. Maybe some cameramen didn’t want to wake up so early for Colton and decided to nap it out. Could you blame them? “Screw it, let him do a selfie video on his phone. No one will care either way.” You got that right. Does anyone even remember what he said? Didn’t think so.

-The group date will consist of Nicole, Demi, Bri, Tracy, Elyse, Hannah G., Onyeka, and Catherine, and they will head to a theater and have to tell a story about a “first” in their lives, while getting coached by Megan Mullally and her husband. Because if we know anything about this show, it’s if there’s one person that personifies the “Bachelor,” it’s Ron Swanson himself. Colton got up there first talking about the first time he told a teammate he was…a virgin. In case you didn’t know, Colton is a virgin. You know, for those who clamored for Jason and/or Blake in this role, honestly think to yourselves, “What was their narrative?” What would they sell to the audience? This show is always telling a story throughout the course of the season. We know what Colton’s is. I’m not sure anything about Jason or Blake screamed they had an interesting story about them. They knew they had a season long storyline with Colton’s virginity and a, “Would he or won’t he?” You didn’t have that with the other two. That played a major role in him getting the gig. And oh yeah, him selling his soul to them.

-Hannah G told a story up there about how she was constantly dateless in middle school and was never really a first for anything until she got the first impression rose. I’m sure tons of women watching an Instagram model talk about how she never has any dates is totally relatable. I’m surprised Hannah didn’t just bust out with the, “I don’t think I’m pretty” line either. That really would’ve made her relatable. Maybe she’s super humble. Or maybe that was a humble brag. I just don’t know if Middle America Jane Doe watching last night really connected with Hannah G. on that one. With that said, I can see why she told the story. She is coming across as quite the candidate for next “Bachelorette.” Doesn’t mean she’ll get it, but she’ll have plenty of fans if she does.

-Elyse’s story is how she’s only dated older men in her life and this is her first time dating a younger man. Man, I feel for ya’ Elyse. Of all the men in America to take that plunge with, THIS is the one you had to do it with? Bless. So whereas Elyse only dated older men, Nicole only dated Cuban or Columbian men in her life until she had a taste of the “whitest bread ever.” I wish we could’ve more of this story. Be interesting to know exactly who was Nicole’s Wonder Bread and how that relationship ended up.

-They saved Demi’s story for last because of course. I’m pretty sure Demi is paying Corinne residuals this season based on the fact she’s copying her Bachelor 101 handbook word-for-word. It’s clear producers fed her leading questions in her ITM’s to continually talk herself up, how she was so much better than the others, how there’s no competition for her, yada yada yada. We know what her role is this season. We’ll hear time and time again she’s just here for Colton and she doesn’t care what the others think of her. As long as people are talking about her on social media, and her IG follower count goes up, and Bachelor Nation comments positively about her, she’ll eat that sh** up. Of course she will. She’s 23. This is her life now. Get ready for a lot of Demi in your life through the summer people. It’s coming.

-The biggest drama from this after party was not shockingly Demi. Now, do I think what she did was all that it was made out to be? Of course not. She touched the rose. Big f***ing deal. But on this show, they made sure to ask all of them, including Tracy, what she thought of that, and you’d think that Demi murdered their pet or something. So in that aspect, no, what Demi did is nothing that we haven’t seen before. That was nothing made into something because of the show. She touched the rose. Sue her. It was just silly. We’ve seen people like Demi every season. None of this is new to any of us. If this is all they could muster up for the first group date drama of the season, unfortunately, we’re in for a loooong season. So easy and simple to write that story out, you’d think after 37 seasons they’d think of something better.

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  1. rob22

    January 15, 2019 at 8:20 AM

    There needs to be a lot more culling of the herd before this season can have a chance of being interesting. But I guess this season is ultimately going to be about the s**t show at the end. We’re just killing time until then, with copious use if the FF button. Never, never watch this show live!!

    Btw RS: I don’t think it would be that difficult for a computer tech to recover your deleted video/podcast or whatever it is. Nothing is really ever deleted.

  2. tinyred500

    January 15, 2019 at 10:18 AM

    Does anyone know if Temptation Island is based on the UK’s Love Island? If so, I’m guessing it’s not in anyway as tacky and gross as Love Island, it would be X-rated if so.

  3. adelina

    January 15, 2019 at 10:50 AM

    Tracy = Heidi Fleiss doppelgänger.

    Colton = boring….can’t carry the show.

  4. tinyred500

    January 15, 2019 at 10:55 AM

    I haven’t seen episode 1 yet, but it sounds dire from some of the comments I’ve seen.

  5. jlal

    January 15, 2019 at 11:46 AM

    I flipped over a couple of times last night and had to flip back to my other show. Just didn’t hold my attention at all. The Demi drama was obviously contrived, as most of the drama is now. Don’t know in the early days if the drama was as producer prompted or it just wasn’t as obvious. But, the drama is just eye rolling, and groan producing now.

  6. ctrealitygirl

    January 15, 2019 at 1:13 PM

    I’m with everyone else. I swore I wouldn’t watch when they named Colton as the Bachelor. Last week was a hot mess with the interruption for viewing parties. And I’m guessing they did that just because they knew Colton can’t carry a full 2-hour show w/o some help! Not only is he boring, I don’t even think he’s that good looking…definitely not my type. And not liking too many of the women either. My fav so far is Elyse, but she appears way too good for this show…same with Hannah G and Cassie. They are classy and way too good for Colton. And Demi isn’t even an interesting villain…just Corinne.2. Boring!!! Can we just skip to Bachelorette??
    PS…why in hell did he give a rose to that train wreck on the 1-on-1 date??? Yikes, was that painful to watch!

  7. corn29

    January 15, 2019 at 1:52 PM

    I like the Demi = Corrine angle. For some reason I never did the math. But they have the same shallow, vapid personality and bad hair extensions.

    Nicole bores me too. She acts like she’s the only Cuban in the world and none of us in the audience can comprehend what Cuba is.

  8. corn29

    January 15, 2019 at 1:58 PM


    > Colton = boring… can’t carry the show.

    Yep. I was thinking the boring 1 on 1 was Colton’s fault rather than Hannah B.’s.

    Annie was right!

  9. ctrealitygirl

    January 16, 2019 at 6:51 AM

    PS…I wholly agree with RS about the cringe-worthy opening scene with Colton doing a selfie video in bed. PLEASE let them NOT do that every week! And enough with the shower scenes too! I guess since he’s so boring they’re trying to make it up with focusing on his physical attributes…NOT working!

  10. minearereal

    January 16, 2019 at 1:02 PM

    @rob22: If the file was deleted from the computer, then definitely it would be accessible even after an accidental delete, but Steve stated it was deleted from the “recorder”, so it would depend on what kind of storage the recorder uses whether it’s possible or not (most likely yes – but it would take an expert).

    @tinyred500: Check out the wiki for Temptation Island and you will see all of equivalent show names related to this show, along with the years they aired, and in which country. UK Love Island was not on the list, but Temptation Island airing in UK in 2001 was. Temptation Island aired starting in 2001-2003 in the US and Love Island aired in the UK in 2005-2006, so if anything would be based on the other, it would be the opposite of what you mentioned.

    Steve’s grammatical errors were at an all time high this post. He needs to read through his article before posting. He has quotes with no end, their/there mistakes, etc. I know it’s just a blog post, but good lord, just one simple read through should catch most. 🙂

  11. jlal

    January 16, 2019 at 1:29 PM

    RS obviously doesn’t care about his poor writing skills. I have been saying the same thing for years. Sometimes his posts are downright painful to read.

  12. tinyred500

    January 17, 2019 at 10:17 AM

    Thank you for the info., and confirmation. 😉 RS mentioned a while back that Love Island would be airing in America, so I just wondered whether they’d changed the name to…Temptation Island. 😀

  13. jhptygate

    January 18, 2019 at 6:10 PM

    He makes Ari seem interesting.

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