Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails,” Last Night’s IG Live & Chris Harrison Speaks on Rachael

Photo Credit: ABC

Hi Steve!

I am curious, would you say that you overall enjoy your job? I know there is a lot of shit that is thrown at you that is probably very stressful/ annoying, but if you had to answer yes or no what would you say? I am just curious if you feel like there would be a different job that you would prefer. Or if you ever feel like you have an obligation to do this for as long as the show is on air. I’d say these last four or five days, the answer would be a resounding no. It took a toll. But overall in the 17 years I’ve been covering, the answer would be yes. I’ve always enjoyed writing, and I enjoy spoiling the show. The social media aspect is getting a little worrisome as it’s just a non stop barrage of people giving you their, mostly, uninformed opinions. I never really had to deal with that say, 5 years ago. Now it’s non stop and can get incredibly annoying after a while.

Second question: do you ever get annoyed of the type of “tea” you receive? For example a couple weeks ago I sent you a screen shot of texts about a contestant from a mutual friend of theirs, and the content in it wasn’t really groundbreaking. Does that type of stuff annoy you because your inbox gets filled with clutter, or would you like people to send you stuff they hear about contestants regardless of how juicy it is?

Thanks for all you do!

Comment: I’m fine with any tea – except for repetitive stuff. Stuff that I’ve tweeted about, said in my podcast, or written in my column. Then someone sends me something that I’ve already made clear I’m aware of, yeah, that just becomes clutter.

Hey Steve – Long time reader/follower/fan here… I had a few comments/questions…

1) Why is production so keen on having a cold weather filming location for the upcoming season? I would think, since it’s the dead of winter, they’d want to do something more warm weather and uplifting… I know you shot down the idea on your live with Ashley last week (1/26), but could this be some sort of winter games type season? Maybe they want the complete opposite of last season’s Bachelorette where the guys looked like they had a bucket of water poured on their head before every date.

2) Why do people ask Nick Viall for relationship advice? Not sure if you’ve seen it or heard about it, but he does the little question box on Instagram weekly and people ask him for relationship advice. It’s one of the most baffling things I’ve seen on the internet (and that’s saying A LOT these days). Why do young women want relationship advice from a thrice failed Bachelor franchise man in his 40’s who’s now dating an early-20’s model/influencer? I have no idea.

3) Also in your IG Live last week (1/26), when discussing potential bachelorettes, it was brought up to keep an eye on people who are getting “new looks”…. well, Tia not only somehow went and bought herself a nice big house and settles very soon, but she also just got herself a fresh haircut and color, and she’s a Jesus-thumper like they seem to like lately. I know she was also considered for the Clare/Tayshia season.. thoughts they’re moving forward with her this time? Well, this email was sent before last weekend. Tia will not be the “Bachelorette.”

Gotta say, I’m a HUGE fan of the work you put into this. I started reading and following more religiously with Arie’s season because I literally could not have cared any less about him, but then it became an addiction to know what was going on during filming and having the inside scoop! Thanks for doing the work and bringing us what we want – facts and truth!

Comment: Thanks. I try my best to give the masses as much information as possible that they aren’t getting anywhere else. And lately, I’ve been on a crusade to get rid of misinformation.

Hi Steve,

Long-time fan and avid Reality Steve follower, but this is my first time emailing in!

1. Have you ever been recognized on the street before? What shows other than the Bachelor would you recommend? Can count on two hands how many times it’s happened in my life. It’s better that way. As for other shows, are you talking reality or non-reality?

2. Who would you personally be most excited to see as the next bachelorette? or next bachelor? or on bachelor in paradise? So not a prediction of who the next person would be but just your own opinion on who would make for great television. As I’ve always said, I don’t care who the next lead is. All I care about is that there IS a next season. But I’m totally fine with Katie as the “Bachelorette.” She fits the mold.

3. What is the casting process like? How do people usually get jobs as producers on the Bachelor? You gotta work in the TV industry in LA for that.

4. How do people integrate back into their normal lives after the Bachelor? Do you think they have a harder or easier time dating? or with their careers? and do they regret it? Everyone seems to have a very hard time immediately just transitioning back. Impossible to answer for everyone. Some people’s post-Bachelor lives have far exceeded what they were doing before. Others who thought they’d ride that train have fallen on their face.

5. I was surprised when Dylan said his mom helped him negotiate the contract. What are the things previous contestants have done to try and control their narrative on the show? For example, I’ve always wondered whether Kit had figured something out ahead of time. There isn’t much you can do to control your narrative, even though a lot of them think they can outsmart production. Dylan was a wallflower on Hannah’s season basically. I can’t think of one thing he did on that season that stuck out. Maybe that was his plan. I don’t know.

6. Could you comment a little bit on how come Bachelor Producers haven’t really responded to criticisms about asian-american portrayals on the show?
Basically because they rarely respond to any criticism. It took them 40 seasons to finally respond to/address the fact the diversity on their show sucked for 18 years.

7. Worst and best dates in your opinion in recent Bachelor/bachelorette/BIP history? Which date idea would you have loved to go on?

Comment: I mean, I thoroughly enjoyed the carnival date on Monday night. Right up my alley. And bowling too.

Hi Steve,

I remember awhile back in one of your columns, you posted something about being informed of a BachNation couple that people would be happy about. Lately I’ve been more of a podcast listener than a column reader, so I apologize if this has been addressed, but any chance that was Becca and Blake? I can’t tell if I think something is going on between them now or if they’re feeding into the rumours for social media engagement purposes. Tell us what you know!!

Thanks as always!

Comment: It’s not Becca and Blake.

I was told something from someone, and when I wrote that the next day, it was literally one sentence in a 4 page column, but everyone seems to be hanging on to what I said. It was more of a throw away line to make another point, but, I have not heard whether or not what I was told was even true nor have I even followed up on it. So I have no idea at this point.

Hi Steve, I have a question for your page or just for you.

I have heard so many contestants say they lined up at casting calls in hopes of getting on the show. Then if they get through that, sometimes they are fortunate to get to the next step in the casting process.

I have also heard contestants who are asked how they got on the show say a producer approached them in their DM’s asking if they would be interested in being on the show.

Is there any truth to this? If there are hundreds or thousands of people applying, why would a producer go seeking out a random person in their DM’s?

Is this just a bs line they use because they don’t want to admit that they themselves actively applied to get on the show?


Comment: No, most people cast on this show are recruited. Very few anymore, if any, are cast because they show up at an open casting call.

Bachelor Nation has become so toxic and Matt is so boring with no compelling narrative I am struggling to get thru this season. The producers are clearly creating drama where none exists solely to keep viewers interested. I had the audacity to suggest that Jessenia might be a little short for a 6 ft 4 6 ft 5 Bachelor and got accused of height shaming by Jessenia herself and some trolls. Is height shaming a thing? The editing has been so bad I thought Jessenia I was actually voted off two weeks ago and I have barely gotten to know her and MJ so who cares who goes home? I mean at Matt’s height is he not considerably taller than Jessenia? Is this an inconvenient fact? I guess if you don’t support the people the producers are pushing you are a bullying a racist a height shamer etc The toxic attack mode of Bachelor Nation is ruining the show imo

Comment: I mean, saying Matt might be too tall for Jessenia, yeah, I’d say that’s height shaming. What’s the point of saying that? How would you know if Matt had a height requirement on who he’s with? Just seems unnecessary to say. Is it the worst offense ever said on social media? No. But I would definitely just re-think before you say something like that. Just think before any post, “Is what I’m saying really adding any value to the conversation at hand?” If the answer is no, don’t hit send. And if you’re really being honest with yourself, I know it’s your opinion, but sharing you thought Jessenia was too short for Matt just seems off the mark when you don’t know what he’s into.

I am really starting to think that the reason they do not want someone from outside Bachelor Nation is because Matt is seeing through the BS of the women and the drama inside the house that production pushes to the limits. He sure is taking them out quickly and probably made their (producer’s) life difficult.

I sure feel like their attempt to mix it up and bring in someone they felt safe and also helped meet a quote/make them look good with all the racial inequality debate backfired because the lead didn’t tolerate what another lead might overlook because they “get the storyline factor”.

Do you think there is any merit to this? Would love to hear your thoughts. I honestly don’t think that has anything to do with it. Matt is eliminating the quantity of women in the same amount/order as past seasons, really. He’s just doing it a little differently. It’s not like production is caught off guard by this. They have a role in everything that happens.

Also…guessing after more Rachael stuff came out you decided against the podcast with the family member. I saw the article with Sun with the cousin and curious if the same member you were thinking of bringing on? They decided against it actually once the Old South formal pic came out. It became too much at that point and they figured it wouldn’t help matters. Not to mention, ABC’s tone changed after that, something we discussed on the live last night. I’ve spoken to a few people close to the situation. No need to name names.

I know you plan on bringing this to the live but I honestly think being BHM that two different lives or a podcast on this would be better with someone in Bachelor Nation who is an advocate (specifically not caucasion) regarding racial issues. A place to give them a voice to contribute to the discussion. I wish a way to bring on Mike Johnson or Rach Lindsay.

Thanks again for all the information you give the fans regularly. You rock especially calling out the BS. Needs to be done and I really wish BN (Harrison, et all) would themselves…

Comment: It was addressed last night. Hope you watched.

Hi Steve,

Thanks for sharing all your info. I know you have mentioned that you followed a few of this season’s contestants on Instagram… but it doesn’t seem like many of them follow each other. In previous seasons they would often all follow each other and comment on posts regularly. Did they all dislike each other that much that they won’t even use each other for instafame? Also, has Victoria deleted her account or changed her name? She seems to be gone. (Hallelujah)

Comment: I think the show is really cracking down on these contestants moreso than ever. Clearly friends were made this season. They’re just being less vocal about it because I think the show told them to. As for Victoria, she re-activated hers on Monday night.

When the lead “cancels” the cocktail party, is that really their doing or just production trying to get the girls worked up?


Comment: They’re usually only cancelled when the lead really doesn’t see a need to talk to everyone when they know who they want to send home. But also, yes, it’s done to “shake things up” and get reactions from contestants.

Hey again Steve, this is a follow-up to my email from Friday. if Tyler fell for someone when he was there it must’ve been a behind the scenes thing or the article I read claiming that is wrong. I was a little disappointed when I heard Katie is to be the bachelorette. Was hoping for Abigail or maybe Michelle. Yeah, Matt was saying in interviews last week promoting Monday’s episode that Tyler “fell” for someone, which was ridiculous. We all know that didn’t happen because we all know he’s been dating Camila Kendra for months. It was a whole lot of hype for no pay out. Not sure why people thought Tyler actually fell for one of Matt’s girls. I’m pretty sure Matt was referring to the masseuse, more of as a joke. But when you took that quote in a vacuum, everyone assumed it was one of his girls.

as a 22-year-old blind woman i’m constantly getting frustrated and the lack of people with disabilities and popular TV shows. even though Abigail‘s not the most outgoing woman tis season, she still speaks her mind and could have handled the role just as well as others have in the past. All I can do is hope that they have more contestants in the future who will die versify the franchise.

Comment: On a show like this, I can think of 2 in 25 seasons that had disabilities – Sarah Herron and Abigail. Apologies if there was anyone else that I’m blanking on, but those are the two that immediately come to mind. I just don’t think this show is ever going to start leaning in that direction for its contestants. It’s just not what they’re about.



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