Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails,” Last Night’s IG Live & Chris Harrison Speaks on Rachael

Photo Credit: ABC

Hey Steve,

1) What are your thoughts on the mess that is the Houston Texans? Why not try and score a phenomenal deal with Deshaun so you can try and start to rebuild a team who desperately needs an offensive line overhaul (and more)? Maybe a trade with Miami for Tua and a couple high round draft picks? If you were the front office what would you suggest? It’s tough. Because he’s a top 5 QB in this league. And 25. A franchise that trades away someone that good at such a young age is going to piss off their fans. But they’ve done nothing to help him thus far in his career. So I can see why he wants out. So they either call his bluff and doubt he’ll just not show up and sit out a whole season, or, they trade away a generational player and try and get a boatload for him. I don’t know what I’d do.

2) Now that Brady has won #7 with a formerly awful franchise, is there now any LEGITIMATE discussion that he is not hands down the greatest football player ever to have played the game?

Comment: No. And it’s not even close.

Hi again Steve,

I have one more question for you. How do you choose which contestant stories to publish on your site, vs those you don’t feel appropriate to share?

For example, you held off sharing on Carly and Evan’s breakup and Rachel/raven feud but shared Jenna coopers story/Victoria fuller. I didn’t know if there was a rule you generally followed with it ext. Thanks for your time!

Comment: The Carly stuff I held off on because I found out a week before she was delivering a baby. Raven & Rachel I don’t even know if what I’ve heard is true. So no reason to report that. Everything is a case-by-case basis. There’s not a universal answer to your question.

Hey Steve!

I was wondering your thoughts on why they keep passing up Tia for bachelorette? I feel like she is always an option but always passed up. I’m sure people would complain about her because they want more diversity but Katie isn’t much different. I like Katie but we don’t really know anything about her so I’m surprised they picked her. I mean I know the audience didn’t know much about Matt either but atleast we saw all his Tiktoks. I was just curious on your opinion about it!

Comment: I don’t think she was an option this season. When I gave my list last week, I was just listing women from past seasons that were even single and an option if they went outside of Matt’s season. Not necessarily that she was in the running.

Hi Steve-

I’m curious what the lead and contestants do all week? All the women state over and over every episode that they don’t get any time with him. I understand that there’s a lot we aren’t seeing so they can fit a week into a two-hour episode, but what do they do on the days no one is on a date each week? And why doesn’t the show use that time to allow them more time with the lead to further their connections? The easy answer is because that’s not how the show works. They do nothing. When you’re not on a date, you just sit around, have guy/girl chats with the rest of the people left, and you film ITM’s.

Also, quick side note, I worked at Nemacolin and it’s so funny to watch this season knowing the layout of the resort and how fake some of what they do is. Heather was shown staying in the Lodge, which is connected to the Chateau (where the rose ceremonies take place), yet they had her drive from the back of the resort and then act amazed when she got to the Chateau. Also, it’s visible as you drive towards the resort from the airport so she definitely already saw it. Just a differed experience watching when you know the place.

Thanks for all the spoilers over the years! I always enjoying reading!

Comment: Good stuff. We had that emailer last week who worked there who said when Rachael pulled up in a car for her 1-on-1 date, it wasn’t a long drive at all.

1. Is Rachael’s family not upset that Matt is partying without a mask and their family member has COVID?

2. Have you heard how Matt feels about all the stuff surrounding Rachael?

3. Do you think they’re on the rocks right now?

4. Super random but I recently watched Brad 2.0’s After the Final Rose and Chris Harrison said Brad and Emily were supposed to get married live on AFR. Is that true? They were planning a wedding?

Comment: Questions 1-3, I haven’t even bothered to ask. Matt’s name has never been brought up once in any conversation I’ve had with the family insider. I’ve never asked because I respect the fact that it puts them in an awkward position and they’d probably never tell anyway.

I remember him saying that at the time, but I don’t remember if that was realistic. Especially considering the way the rest of their relationship went. Brad was never moving to North Carolina bc of his work and I thought Emily said she wasn’t ever going to move to Austin because of her daughter. I would think that would’ve had to have been agreed upon before any wedding happened. So I’m not sure I buy it.

Hey Steve,

A question for you:

Do the producers know most seasons who they want for Bachelor/Bachelorette and produce accordingly? For example, Katie has gotten so much positive air time this season, way above those who end up in the final 4. Same with Colton and Hannah B. Heck they even chose Matt to be the Bachelor and he didn’t even end up on his season on the Bachelorette!

I know there are likely exceptions and times this hasn’t worked out (which is why we got Arie and Claire as leads), but overall seems like their choice is made before the season even starts?

Comment: Before they start filming? No. They might have some people in mind, but they don’t know ultimately how someone is going to act on camera before they start. Now, before it starts airing is a different story. Because they’ve already filmed the whole season and have an idea of how they can show any contestant they want, and who’ll get a Bachelorette edit.

Hi Steve,

Congratulations on a great live last night with Ashley. I could tell from listening that you’ve been doing a lot of work behind the scenes examining your own personal biases and reflecting on how they impact your world view. Having done this work myself, I know how humbling it is. I found it hard to reflect on things I’ve thought or said or done in the past that were rooted in racism, but reflecting on it was the only way to make sure I didn’t do it again.

I tip my hat to you for leading by example (as you report on things like the Rachael case) and doing your own reading/work to make yourself a better ally to the BIPOC community. I heard the evidence of your reading in the live tonight. You are making a difference!

Comment: Thanks. All I’m trying to do is better understand. And I will speak up when I see it in the franchise. I’ve just never been someone to share everything I’m doing on social media. I think the biggest thing we wanted to do was bring stuff up that made people uncomfortable. Because that’s the only way anything will get accomplished. I’ve lived in my white bubble for 45 years. There’s nothing wrong with stepping outside of it and at least trying to learn more about those around me. It’s been quite eye opening to say the least and realize how little I knew or ever thought about.


I love you, the world loves you, but people come to your blog to read spoilers. Maybe you should chill out without feeling like you need to figure out all the associated problems and take sides? Came off a bit crazy this week.

You’re great, but don’t overestimate your importance either.

Comment: SMH.

Hi Steve!

I’m writing this pretty close to midnight so I hope it’s not too late!

I remember when the pictures came out from last week with Rachael. At first I thought “what’s the big deal this is southern tradition”. But after thinking about it for a few days I saw a different perspective.

My dad was raised in the south during the civil rights movement and eventually was a KA at a small college in Virginia during the 1970s. I remember seeing pictures of his old south balls in a confederate uniform. In the 1990s, his perspective changed. He was invited to another old south party and realized the southern history behind the balls and decided not to go.

My mom was raised in the Midwest and moved to North Carolina to attend a small women’s college in the 1980s. She also went to old south balls and large universities nearby. My mom was enamored by the south with their food, hospitality and southern college traditions such as old south balls. She did not understand the history behind the balls. During the racial unrest this summer, my mom expressed to me that she wished she understood the history behind the old south balls and if she knew, her decision to go would have been different.

I’m a senior in college in south Florida but grew up in North Carolina. I’m in a small sorority that is diverse and I’m so proud to be a part of an organization that actively recruits POC. I’ll never forget about two years ago, my friends from high school were about to become Raleigh Debutantes. It’s a tradition that goes back to the civil war and the Raleigh debutantes are all white. I remember feeling left out that I wasn’t a part of the tradition. However, I realized that I didn’t want to be a part of a society where POC were intentionally left out.

I think that with the old south balls people either don’t understand/know the history behind the old south balls or people do know and choose to be complicit. We simply don’t know which category Rachael falls in but some of the other photos make her ignorance stand out more. In light of the photos from last week, I hope Rachael can learn from her experience at the old south ball and can educate herself about the history behind it. My hope is that as a society, we can become more aware of the history behind old south traditions and become more aware of their meaning.

Thanks Steve!

Comment: At this point, it’s on her to prove to people if she’s apologizing because she got caught, or if she really understands WHY people are offended, and if she really wants to learn and be anti-racist. That will not be solved with a statement. Like I said, she has A LOT of work ahead of her. And because of being a public figure now, she’s going to have to do it in public by sharing on IG. And yeah, she’ll get called out for being performative. Hell, I’m already getting it, and I’m not nearly as noticeable as she is. But better to be called out for being performative than not, because at least it shows you’re making an effort to get better. If she does nothing publicly, it’ll cause way more people to doubt she’s doing anything to improve herself.

I have been listening to your Instagram conversation with Ashley and want to say thank you. The bachelor franchise has always seemed a frivolous escape to me and your earliest posts reflected that. Now, none of us can escape the issues that affect our country. I thought the Taisha/Ivan conversation was a step on the right direction but Matt’s season has been a major disappointment. Why have we spent a season on white mean girls when there are amazing women like Magi who is beautiful, accomplished, kind and has her own foundation? She should have received the star treatment of Ben Higgins who from all sources is a worthy individual, but she is female and Black. Michelle is a teacher in private life ; perhaps she will still have the conversation with Matt that would educate the audience on racism.

But in the meantime, it is important for those of us who are addressing our own ignorance of the racism that our fellow citizens are facing on a daily basis to hear you and Ashley discuss this with the sincerity (and sometimes awkwardness) and integrity that this demands. Thank you again!

Comment: Thanks. The response so far has been mostly positive, which has been great. I hope people learned something. Or at least thought about something they’ve never thought before.

Send all links and emails to: To follow me on Twitter, it’s: Instagram name is RealitySteve, or join my Reality Steve Facebook Fan Page. Talk to you tomorrow.



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