Those that followed along in the offseason know that Ashley Spivey and I are no longer doing our IG lives on Tuesdays. One main reason is that Ashley is no longer watching the show anymore. But I wanted to bring attention to something she dealt with this past weekend, and something she’s been dealing with ever since her miscarriage recently. Please read her whole thread. This is just disgusting:
I just want to share a message that @instagram and @Facebook doesn’t consider harassment. Someone can tell you that you caused your baby’s death and they will literally never send back a report saying they reviewed it or that they did anything about it. pic.twitter.com/ebiU9I2WU7
— Ashley Spivey (@AshleySpivey) June 4, 2021
I hate that Ashley has to go through this. She will always be a friend to me and I hate that there’s really nothing I can do to help. Or anyone else for that matter. I’ve reported IG and Twitter accounts that have harassed her and nothing happens. You are one sick individual to tell someone who recently lost a child it’s their fault. For the record, when Ashley first shared this on IG, she did not spare this person’s name on IG. That person has since deleted their account. Good. I’ll never understand people that attack someone else like this, then expect not to get shit in return. They deleted their account because of all the people that went after them once Ashley posted. I’m sorry, but that’s NOT on Ashley. She has every right to share who you are and your IG name if you’re stupid enough to send her something so awful. I just wish Twitter and/or IG would actually do something about online harassment like this. If you think this is the only person who has attacked Ashley for her miscarriage, you are sorely mistaken. People disgust me.
There are going to be changes on this site moving forward. I realize that a lot of what I say holds major weight with the fanbase in this franchise. For a long time, while I knew I had a loud voice when it came to this show, I never quite grasped sometimes how my words and reporting impacted people and the labels they were immediately given. Once the Jenna situation happened, I made sure to do a better job at reporting on contestants, and I believe I’ve done that. Even if I knew something to be true, either by photographic evidence, or a phone call, but I couldn’t post it to protect a source I was still being used as the middle man for people to speak out on behalf of someone who didn’t want to be dragged into something. I don’t think that’s going to happen much, if at all, going forward. Everything is a case-by-case basis, but the bad has certainly outweighed the good the number of times I’ve done that.
Just last night during the premiere, I had 5 different people contact me about 5 different guys this season with stories that were, shall we say, not of the positive nature. Some worse than others, but still, all people contacting me to say, “Oh, this guy on Katie’s season, you should know THIS about him.” And I told all 5 of them the same thing. Unless you’re willing to put your name behind it and share what you want people to know, I’m sorry, but I’m not going to be the middle man on this. And they either didn’t respond back, or, just said they don’t want to be involved. This is what I’ve been dealing with for years. In the past, I would’ve started asking for more details on their info, proof, etc and then decided whether or not to run with it. But not anymore. Is it good tea? Sure it is. And I know a lot of you would eat it up. It’s just not worth it to me anymore. Go read IG accounts who will post anything while readily admitting the stuff they post isn’t vetted. Or, to cut and paste exactly what it says on their page, “statements made on this account have not been independently confirmed. this account does not claim any information published is based in fact.” So yeah, the hypocrisy is laughable here. I have never and will never knowingly put something out there that I knew or know to be false. But other accounts do it and you eat it up. Think about that. I’m not the only one who should be trying to be better here.
I openly said a couple months ago that I needed to change and this is one major way that it’s going to happen. Doesn’t mean there won’t be any tea in the future, but it’ll be more show related. When it comes to contestants, I’ve realized with this fan base, I could present all the evidence in the world backing up my story against them, but it doesn’t matter. If someone likes that person, then it can’t possibly be true. And that’s just sad. People cannot be objective when it comes to someone they like in this franchise, and then it gets taken out on me if I report anything negative, not to mentioned used as a talking point on podcasts/blogs/discussions. Hell, all anyone has to do is SAY something remotely negative about a contestant, and immediately they feel the ire of that contestants fan base. Sometimes to the point of harassment. Sucks that this is the world we live in now, but we’re here and it’s not getting any better. Facts don’t matter anymore. It’s everyone’s own self truth. You love hearing the tea if it’s about someone you don’t like. But if you love that contestant, it’s “oh no way, that can’t possibly be true. Why do you hate them so much?” It shouldn’t work that way, but it does.
Like think of someone who universally isn’t all that well liked in this franchise. Going off recency bias, I think it’s safe to say someone like Victoria Larson isn’t the most well liked contestant, right? Probably has more people that don’t like her than do. If there were major negative tea about her out there, fans would be much more open to believe it and rejoice in it than say, oh I don’t know, any fan favorite out there. Like a Ben Higgins or a Kaitlyn or a Tayshia or a Hannah Ann. It’s just the way people are wired. I’m not saying any of those 4 mentioned DO have negative tea on them, I’m just saying it’s safe to assume when looking at this franchise as a whole, they are some of the fan favorites, so if you heard something pretty bad about them, most people wouldn’t immediately believe it. You’d have to do way less of a convincing job to get people to believe it versus something on Victoria. WAY more people would immediately be inclined to believe dirt on Victoria and probably have fun with it. It’s just becoming such a headache now. You can’t say anything about anyone without their fanbase having a conniption.
I think things will come up as the season goes on, whether it be with Katie’s guys or whatever is happening down in Paradise, where contestants behavior is called into question. Because I bring it up, it doesn’t mean I hate them. It doesn’t mean I have a vendetta against them. It doesn’t mean that I think they are the worst human ever and I’m out to “ruin contestants lives” as so many have said in recent months. I’m going to try and stick to reporting what happens on the show and stay away from something off air. However, there will inevitably at some point be something off air that needs to be brought up because it will relate to something on air. I will always have an opinion on contestants based on what I see on the show. And if something off air becomes a topic, I will weigh in as well. I know that the whole “you ruin peoples lives” has taken on a life of it’s own, but the amount of things that I HAVEN’T shared over the years far outweighs the stuff I have reported. Not to mention the numerous positive stories you’ve heard from contestants that they’ve shared on my podcast. Just keep that in mind.
There’s stuff going on right now that you wouldn’t believe. I could show you the evidence, out a source, and you’d still find a way to say it’s wrong. Would you love to hear it? Of course you would. Would it be a major talking point amongst the fanbase? 100%. Yet if I reported it, I’d be providing podcasts with their content to talk about. So it’s a slippery slope. Can’t have it both ways, even though they have been. You can’t get pissed at me for reporting tea on the franchise, then using THAT EXACT TEA as the content for your podcasts/blogs/discussions. Doesn’t that make you just as complicit? But of course none of them see it that way, they just blame me. The hypocrisy and exaggerations over these last two months has been alarming. But that all ends now. They can find new content, because outside of spoilers, unless it’s something major, I’m just not interested reporting that anymore.
Before Ashley and I ended our IG lives back in April, I do remember saying I’d heard quite a few negative things about Katie’s guys. One of them being Greg, who is clearly an early favorite of the fanbase and of Katie. Hell, he might even be the winner for all we know. Is it something she could’ve known during filming? No. But as I’ve been told by so many people, it’s not my place to try and butt in and help out, even if I know the information to be true. So I’m removing myself from this. This is how things are gonna be handled going forward. Same with all the stuff I was told last night by people contacting me about some of her guys. No point in sharing it or naming names. Oh well. Not my concern anymore. I only mentioned Greg by name now since he was someone I said by name back in April on an IG live when I probably shouldn’t have, since now we know Greg is a front runner this season. We were still fairly early in filming when I first mentioned him. It was before I even knew he got the first impression rose I believe. My goal right now is to find out more spoilers about this season and update you on any spoilers down in Mexico for BIP filming.
June 8, 2021 at 10:14 AM
I did not care for the double host combo at all. That was just a bad idea. They should have had one or the other.
June 8, 2021 at 10:56 AM
I really liked the Kaitlyn and Tayshia combo. It allows not only for them to interact with Katie, but for them to comment on the goings on in a way that couldn’t happen with just one host. It’s like a fun girl group. And since they are both engaged there is no actual competition from them for the guys. I did think Katie worrying about having to “handle this on her own” and having K&T surprise her was ridiculous. No way could she have possibly thought ABC was sending her out there without a “chaperone.” And I’m sure they all met plenty of times beforehand to cement their friendship and help with chemistry. Overall not a bad first night.
June 8, 2021 at 12:46 PM
I had no reaction to the double hostess. But it was an ok first night. Some of the scenes were amusing. Kimmel was so funny with the OMG. And yeah glad you are having your party – can’t go but glad we are normal enough to have it.
I really tried to find the jerk that said that horrible thing to Ashley but as you said taken down. I was going to give her a piece of my mind. I was appalled just blown away at how mean it was. Not that it would do any good – people are not nice these days.
Just an observation – I don’t think you should shy away from what you report. So many of the Bachelor world has reached out to you to help when false information is published etc….so all of this is nonsense and foolishness. Can we just go back to spoilers and fun stuff and stop with all the toxic. Sheez
June 8, 2021 at 1:31 PM
Rather than watching the same, boring, rehashed storylines this season, after watching every episode of all prior 42 seasons, I’m binge watching Bachelor Canada and Married at First Sight instead this summer. Still may tune in for BIP though…
June 8, 2021 at 2:49 PM
I didn’t mind the two hosts last night and really don’t care that Harrison is no longer taking part.
I am disappointed to have to see Nick “slushy voice thirst trap try hard” Viall on BIP. He is insufferable.
June 9, 2021 at 8:07 AM
Nick “slushy voice thirst trap try hard” Viall. LOL
June 14, 2021 at 7:49 PM
June 14, 2021 at 7:57 PM
Nick Viall has to one of the smarmiest, oiliest bohunks ever. I quite literally cringe whenever that leering smile crosses the screen. Isn’t his 15 minutes up yet? Who is he blackmailing to keep getting more on-air time? I’m truly trying to curb my instincts here and not unleash a litany of abusive slurs on the cur so I’m signing off. I try to contain myself but I usually escape! ?
June 17, 2021 at 12:17 PM
What is with the paranoia of people who are vaccinated worried to be around people who are not vaccinated? What is the point of being vaccinated if you are still afraid of those who aren’t? It just doesn’t make any sense. Shaking my head.
June 17, 2021 at 12:20 PM
And if the people who are paranoid or worried about someone spreading the virus that is easily squashed by asking for a current Covid test to attend the party, easy Peasy.
June 17, 2021 at 12:27 PM
It was not at all surprising to me that Chris Harrison was leaving the franchise. Once someone gets a bit of a spanking and time off they start hearing all of the he said she said stuff that has been going on behind their back‘s and they realize that there are other opportunities I had for them so it usually does end and they’re not returning to their job. I expected this from the moment Chris announced time off. I knew it would be permanent, it just makes sense.