Reality Steve

The Bachelorette 13 - Rachel

The “Bachelorette” Rachel Episode 3 Recap, My Appearance on Olivia’s Podcast, & DeMario’s Ex

Photo Credit: ABC

-Group date is next up. Bryan, Jonathan, Peter, Alex, Will, and Fred go to the “Ellen” show, which we all saw two months ago. Well, except for the “Never Have I Ever” game they played. I hope Ellen realizes these aren’t 5 year olds with funny catchphrases, or, female cousins who walk the red carpet asking questions. Can’t say I watch “Ellen” all that much (if at all), but it seems like a lot of her stuff centers around that. Oh, and putting her assistants through haunted houses and laughing at them. That too. Anyway, Rachel and Ellen are backstage when the guys enter thinking they’re just gonna get to watch the show. Rachel informs Ellen that Jonathan tickled her, which Ellen didn’t like, and Will dressed as Urkel, which Ellen also didn’t like. Just wait til she lets Ellen know that Fred has been stalking her for 20 years looking for a kiss. That’ll go over well.

-When the guys are watching backstage, Ellen asks Rachel if she’s kissed anyone yet, and she said yes she has, she was surprised by it, but really liked it. To which everyone else who watched Bryan suck her face off went, “Ummmm, really?” Anyway, one person who is surprised by this? Jonathan. He had no idea any of the guys had kissed her. Which shouldn’t be too surprising considering Jonathan is essentially chick repellent himself, he wouldn’t necessarily pick up on that. We’re in episode 3 Jonathan. She’s already had a full episode of dates. You really think she hadn’t kissed anyone yet? Boy do you have another thing coming considering in this episode alone, she made out with SEVEN different guys – and that’s just of what they showed. You know who they didn’t show? Jonathan. Womp wooooomp. Something tells me Jonathan grew up fiddling with Rubik’s cubes also.

-After the Magic Mike dancing for the audience, Channing Tatum’s job is safe. Alex probably sold it the most, but his dancing just looked like he was doing an ab workout. Can’t really say that had Channing shaking in his boots. They played a game of “Never Have I Ever” that got somewhat interesting. Here were the questions we saw. “Never Have I Ever…

“…thought about having sex with Rachel.” Alex and Peter both said they haven’t. Peter is on a show looking for a wife. He had the first 1-on-1 date of the season. They had a connection. They made out. She’s obviously into him, and he told her to her face he hasn’t even thought about having sex with her? Hell, even if he’s trying to be a gentleman, I guarantee he lost points in Rachel’s eyes. Guess that explains a lot now, doesn’t it?

“…peed in the pool at the mansion.” Alex admits he has. Everyone has hepatitis C now. Have fun in Paradise, Nick’s girls!

“…texted nude selfies before.” Will, Peter, and Alex all admit to it. Because of course. Frankly, I think the other three are lying.

“…hooked up with someone twice your age.” Oh Freddie, you little devil you. Chasing after 40 year old women when you’re 20. What can he say? The Fred Man likes his cougars.

“…met Rachel before the show.” I’m surprised Fred didn’t show us all the surveillance footage he probably has of Rachel walking in and out of her place.

“…kissed Rachel.” Will, Bryan, and Peter say they have because we’ve seen it. Jonathan is flabbergasted kissing happens on this show, Alex has only practiced on his hard drive, and Fred has been waiting 20 years for something it took Bryan about .15 seconds to accomplish.

-At the after party, lets just put it all out there – Rachel got her tongue on. She made out with 5 of the 6 guys, with the lone wolf being Jonathan. Something he’s quite used to I’m sure. Except this time, lotion wasn’t involved. I say she made out with 5 of them, but she actually only liked making out with 4 of them. I really felt second hand embarrassment for Fred. The guy has waited 20 years for this moment, he was probably soiling himself sitting there waiting to kiss her, he ASKS her first, you can tell she’s completely turned off by it, but Fred thinks he essentially just made her climax. In fact, I think Fred did pull a Jim from “American Pie” himself the way he acted afterwards. It was rough to watch. Like, horror movie rough where you’re watching between the fingers that are covering your face. Afterwards, she pulls Fred aside and while he thinks he’s getting the rose, she basically tells him third grade Fred hasn’t left her mind since he stepped out of the limo, and moving any further along sexually with him would make her vomit in her own mouth, so it’s time to say goodbye. With that, she gives the group date rose to Alex, who surprised her with knowing how to kiss a girl that wasn’t plastic and inflatable.

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  1. RaRa

    June 6, 2017 at 9:39 AM

    I didn’t really see anything that offensive in Lee’s tweets; he was expressing his opinion about the NAACP (as well as Black Lives Matter) being a racist organization (although he goes so far as to also label them “terrorist”). I didn’t see anything in his tweets which would be considered evidence of himself being racists (he didn’t imply that blacks are inferior, etc.). It may have been in poor taste, but not racist in my opinion.

    I’m equally happy with Bryan or Peter. Hopefully Peter will be the next Bachelor.

  2. rob22

    June 6, 2017 at 11:10 AM

    @RaRa: so you AGREE with Lee that the NAACP and BLM are racists organizations? Hmmmm.
    To summarily call them racists is just a smear to dismiss their legitimacy. If people want to take issue with certain positions they take, and make legitimate arguments, I don’t think anyone would have a problem with that. I’m personally not a fan of some of the things they say and do (like blocking traffic and repeating statements in public commentary about scenarios that have been proven false). But dismissing them as racists? That’s what’s called an ad hominem attack. By definition that’s a logical fallacy…. basically just character assassination, and not a valid critique. Any way you look at it, Lee’s tweets were way out of line.

  3. cjscjs711

    June 6, 2017 at 12:02 PM

    The guy Lee revealed who he is. I know it’s just a TV show, but still a shame that someone so blatantly racist got on.

  4. RaRa

    June 6, 2017 at 12:33 PM

    @rob22: I didn’t say I agreed, I said it was his opinion, regarding the racism of those other organizations. Having an opinion about a race-based organization’s approach to racial issues does not necessarily make you a racist in and of itself. I can’t judge whether he is a racist or not unless I hear his reasoning behind his opinion. I do agree that some organizations seem to work to the detriment, rather than to improve, the plight endured by blacks in today’s world, even when they are well intended. I don’t want to make the mistake of assuming that he is basing those opinions simply on the fact that they support minorities. I will say again that even with giving him the benefit of the doubt surrounding his statements, he should have not gone the joke route, but stated his viewpoint in a clear manner. As it was, it came across making him look like an insensitive jerk at the very least.

  5. taxionna

    June 6, 2017 at 1:37 PM

    @RaRa: Comparing the NAACP to the KKK is pretty darn racist. One is a civil rights organization, and the other is a hate group. Period.

    Steve – it’s not “kink in his armor” it’s “chink in his armor,” although “kink” would certainly be more entertaining.

  6. crushonspivey

    June 6, 2017 at 3:33 PM

    This season has been about as exciting as Anthony and Rachel’s date. Complete with plenty of horse crap. Seriously, super dull mostly.

    And the new reveal on who she picked? She blew it. I give her a 0% chance they are still together in 6 months. 37 year old Miami wannabe playboy? Ok, sure, great choice. Not.

  7. tiggertamer

    June 6, 2017 at 3:59 PM

    I agree with RaRa. “Racist” is a word that gets thrown around too much. It’s an ugly thing to call someone and its inappropriate use diminishes its true meaning. I don’t know whether Lee is a racist but I didn’t see anything in what he posted that would warrant him be branded as such. Maybe he’s just immature, or uninformed, or a complete snake; I don’t know.

    Peter for bachelor.

  8. rob22

    June 7, 2017 at 8:03 AM

    I think the larger point about Lee’s comment is that an attack on an organization is not an “opinion”. When you call an entire group racist, without backing it up with any evidence, it’s an attack. So it was very uncalled for Lee to attack a couple of organizations in the way he did. If he wanted to take issue with something that BLM or the NAACP did, and make a coherent argument to back up his views, I’d welcome that. I think advocacy groups often get themselves into hot water by overdoing their advocacy & stretch their reach into places that are inappropriate. I’d even be OK that maybe Lee forgot to mention the good things that these organizations do. But he shouldn’t get a pass for a social media attack on those groups. Just because that’s what people do these days doesn’t make it smart or right. Your friends MIGHT give you a pass for attacks you make on organizations or groups of people (actually most of your friends think you’re an idiot for doing so) but if you climb into the limelight, you’re no longer going to get the benefit of the doubt.

  9. qtontv

    June 8, 2017 at 7:11 PM

    It wasn’t illogical of Rachel to give Eric the rose–she wants to form her own opinion as every adult should. Had her friends *seen* Eric do something questionable, that’d be a different matter, but all Raven did was essentially relay gossip from two biased sources. That’s valid intel to receive from a friend, but not enough info to completely disregard a guy she seems more in. All the rose does is let him calm down and give them both time to get to know each other. Rachel knows first hand not how difficult it can be. Plus she’s friends with Corinne so probably also feels there are unfair “ganging up” that happens for multiple reasons.

    As for listening to crazy lexxxi, that was more about seeing demario’s lying and shady ways coming out! Rachel is a smart investigator let’s remember!!! Always questioning sources and making observations for herself. Love that we have a smart Bachelorette!

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