Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails,” BIP & “Bachelor” Talk

Photo Credit: ABC

Hi Steve!

Quick question for you. I know you’ve said that the third place doesn’t fly home until after the final rose ceremony, but what would have happened with Jason since the overnights and final ceremony weren’t in the same place? Does he get to go home when everyone else heads to the Maldives?

Comment: Well the last time that happened where the overnights weren’t in the same place as the final rose ceremony was Chris Soules season, Kaitlyn after getting eliminated in Bali, still had to fly back to Iowa and stay there a week. So I’m assuming Jason went to the Maldives. But I don’t know for sure.

Hi Steve,

I wanted to pose a few questions your way regarding a host of topics you cover, just to get your thoughts.

1) Podcast Guests – Not sure if you watch Bravo shows at all, but have you considered bringing Cameran Eubanks on as a podcast guest? She currently stars on Southern Charm, but is a former cast member of the original Real World San Diego and participated in more than one challenge back in the day. On her season, she had a bit of a fling with Brad Fiorenza and was friends with many of the old time challenge competitors. It might be interesting to hear her take on the Challenge now compared with back in the day as well as what reality TV is like for her now compared with when she was 19 and in San Diego. It’s possible.

2) The Challenge – of the challenge formats you have personally watched over the years, which one has been your favorite? (Gauntlet, Inferno, Battle of the Seasons, The Duel, Battle of the Exes, Rivals, The Island, Cutthroat, Invasion, Or this new Trifecta) The funny thing is having watched so many of them, I can’t even remember all of them in terms of the format. Like “Exes” obviously I remember that that centered around. And this last Trifecta I remember as well. But some I couldn’t for the life of you tell you the format even though I remember watching it. So I’d probably just go with “Battle of the Exes” since all these people hook up with each other. Pretty easy to cast.

3) Bachelor/ette Casting – do they typically have the majority of the cast for the next season selected before the current season finishes airing? I know they can always make changes, but just curious if a number of the contestants are already selected?

Thank you

Comment: For the most part yes. But as I mentioned on Page 1 yesterday, nothing is ever black and white. Yes, final casting weekend (which takes place over a couple weekends) happened this past week and will be this weekend. But if someone comes along in the month of August they really want on, for sure that person can bypass all the audition steps and get through. But yes, most of their cast is set before they ever decide who their lead is. Because remember, they’re casting a television show, not the best possible 25-28 contestants for their lead.

A co-worker said on the radio the other day the announcer was talking about the Bachelor/Bachelorette and said Rachel is ready to get married, but they have to get married in the order they get engaged (if they want ABC to pay and air the wedding). Do you know if that is correct? I can’t remember how many are still out there engaged. Is JoJo the next and if so, why are they waiting so long to get married?

Comment: I’ve never heard of that before. And Kaitlyn would be before JoJo anyway. Although if you listen to social media, they all think Kaitlyn and Shawn are done and just waiting for them to announce it. I don’t follow her or him so I have no idea what’s been said or what’s going on. But I’ve heard people say they think they’re over and the announcement is imminent.

Hey Steve,

Couple of quick questions. Not necessarily this season because I don’t think there really was a “villain” but in the past, shouldn’t a lead suspect something is going on with a contestant if week after week the producers tell them to call that person last at the rose ceremony? Editing can be tricky. Just because we as viewers see them called last at a rose ceremony, doesn’t mean they actually were.

My other question is someone like Jason, do they fly 24 hours or whatever it may be, have one night at the place then have to turn right around and make another brutal flight home right away or do they give them a few days first? That would really suck. Are you talking about his overnight date? He was there for at least a few days. And the #3 person stays with filming until it’s fully completed.

Any plans for another live podcast taping in Dallas? Recent listener and would love to come out for it!

Thanks Steve!

Comment: I think there definitely will be one again in this calendar year. Just not sure who yet.

Love your site….thanks for sharing all the details lol, saves me from buying those stupid magazines.

Anyways, not really anything important, but I did notice when Jason came back that when he got off the elevator it showed floor 12, but when he knocked on Becca’s door, it was room 1146 or something. Too funny

have a great day

Comment: I did not notice that.

Hey Steve-a-rooni (this is what I call you in my head cause I forget we aren’t actually bffs… just go with it!)

I have some challenge talk to get out.

First thing, I just listened to your bananas podcast the other week and was thinking about the part where he said AYTO has brought zero dynamic, mentally-compelling, good tv characters. He said “I bet you can’t name one, nobody can” and you argued that hunter slightly passes that, but hardly. And I’d just like to say (a year and a half later) that I would have loved to cut in and scream DEVIN!!! Love him or hate him, he is the best tv there is in my opinion. He has the extremely theatrical and dramatic narrative as well as always knowing how to stir the pot at just the right time. He is very strategic, conniving, and actually has balls aka isn’t all talk (cough kailah cough bananas himself when it comes to having to do an elimination to stay). It’s actually quite empty feeling without him this season, as much as I’m usually like “oh shut the f*ck up Devin” every other sentence. But I am bummed cause I read that he was originally bananas’ partner but left for a family emergency, which is when they brought out Tony late. I would have loved to hear the politicking that him and bananas would have done together. Tony is funny but not the most stimulating character. To be fair, when Johnny came on the podcast, it was before Devin had really made a name for himself. Certainly before Devin eliminated him last season.

However, I’m kind of already bored of this season. Last season was called vendettas but there was actually no plot other than trying to not get eliminated and their vendetta had nothing to do with it any more than usual, so it was basically free agents… as was dirty 30. Now this one is rivals 44 essentially… all of which have been done so recently (and have been teams of two or solo for the last like 6 seasons) . I get that it’s more exciting when the grand prize is all for one person or split by two, but I preferred the variety of the duel, gauntlet, cutthroat, etc. where there were bigger teams that had to actually cut the fat instead of letting people coast to the end without athleticism, cause they would have actually been bringing down a whole team then. Now, it would seem sad to only win $30,000 each, like the 4 winners of cutthroat did, compared to the $1M for one or two people this season, but I wish they’d still do something like that so I don’t have to hear the word vendetta ever again and also so that they have no choice but to ally with whatever group they’re teamed with instead of having their preset alliances to not vote them in. Yeah, the titles are basically repeats of past seasons without saying it. I think we can all see that. With more people being thrown in the mix now, the word “rivals” (final reckoning) is used very loosely. Like, are Brad and Kyle really “rivals?” Of course not. I think the audience has come to accept that. And even if I want to see “Battle of the Exes” again, it’s not like I think there’s gonna be this giant animosity with every couple. I’m liking Final Reckoning so far. Lets see how it plays out.

But really, I think there is enough house drama without them encouraging the cast to say and discuss their “vendettas” 24/7, especially because once you’re paired with someone you no longer are against them and only a few of them actually can’t stand each other. I wish they would have done a fresh meat 3 instead but with all the big brother / UK / 3rd party program castoffs, rather than having Natalie and Paulie, Sylvia and joss, and the other new partners pretend they have this deep dislike for each other when they had like 2 seconds of beef on a past show.

Okay I’m done now lol. Thoughts???? I don’t think they’ll do a “Fresh Meat” again because the fresh meat they’re doing is bringing in known reality stars from other shows. That’s their new crop to pull from.

Thanks for being the MVP. Excited to hear Holly’s interview and then listen to Luke twist the Bible into his defense instead of owning up!! Yay!

Comment: And whaddya’ know, he did a religious podcast on Thursday. Anyone listen to it? Needless to say I was busy folding my socks.


So Ben gave a relationship update on his and Ashley I’s podcast this week and said he was “ready to go out and date” and then him and Ashley continued to talk about how he wants to meet someone but its been so hard yada yada yada. I think this is interesting given the fact that he has been dating Lindsay Duke for the last year. I guess it’s possible they aren’t dating anymore. When I heard this all I could think is it was a Bachelor set up. Ashley and Ben have always appear to have an agenda on their podcast and just come off very calculated. Thoughts on this??

Thank you!

Comment: I didn’t hear it, but as I’ve said for the past couple weeks, because Ben is so well liked in the franchise and he’s basically Chris Harrison’s best friend, he can never be ruled out.

Hey Steve

I am not even finished listening to the podcast with Holly and I am sick to my stomach. I usually couldn’t care less what these people do as it doesn’t affect my life. I just feel bad for all of the girls that have been mistreated by Luke and disgusted by his behavior. I really hope Olivia listens to your podcast as she sort of had him smelling like a rose (pun not intended) when she had him on hers. People like look are garbage and I have to laugh at how bad he wants to be the Bachelor! What goes around comes around.

Comment: I think Olivia is well aware of Luke and his antics. I’ve gotten more positive reaction from the Holly interview than any one in recent memory. Not to mention she told me how many people contacted her after the podcast, either in private or on her IG, to thank her for sharing her story. That’s great to hear. It’s why I did it. I knew it would reach people.

Hi Steve,

Contrary to those who think your podcast was due to some singular hatred of Luke, I think it was of great service to women… I truly hope it helps young women learn to see the signs and red flags of an extremely unhealthy relationship. I wish I had heard it years ago… it might have saved me from a lot of pain.

Unfortunately, I too fell victim to a man for many years of similar emotional abuse. And I can’t blame it on youthful naïveté either, because it lasted from my 50th to 60th birthdays, after a couple of (blind) blissful years with him. It doesn’t have to be a “celebrity”…

Everything points to the fact that Luke suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) which stems from an ego that is so weak, they can’t survive without the adoration of others… they can’t be “alone,” they are always the “victim,” they constantly need to put down other people, are often quite religious by the way, think they are special or more deserving, and yes, can be extraordinarily charming. Their words are everything you want to hear, but their actions and behavior never match the words. Their “honesty” is a defense against all their lies. I read a lot about NPD near the end of my relationship and was shocked to identify so many characteristics that matched his personality.

I could so relate my own experiences to Holly’s, particularly with the great empathy she had for him. Since everything is all about “him”… and because his life is “so difficult,” an empathetic woman will excuse so much, very much to her own detriment.

I applaud Holly, for letting it go, for moving on, and for sharing her story…
It took me a lot longer to get over my own. But I don’t regret having gone through it… just wish I had had the knowledge and understanding to walk away sooner…

I’m now 63 and a lot wiser and happier 🙂
Thanks for all you do.


PS – feel free to share this with Holly

Comment: Like this email. Thank you for sharing. And yes, I told Holly.

Hi Steve,

Thanks for a truly illuminating, salacious, and fascinating podcast yesterday! I thought Holly came across as well-adjusted, self-aware, and totally classy in her take on her relationship with Luke and in general. I, for one, will be interested to see how Luke tries to spin this and whether he can at this point.

I wanted to make a quick comment, mainly about the description of (some of) Holly’s behavior in the relationship as “wrong.” First of all, I think your point in doing this was to highlight Holly’s credibility as a guest–i.e., if she did not admit her own culpability in some way, then she looks like a scorned lover who is just coming on to bash her ex, so the fact that she admitted her own mistakes makes her story believable. So please do not take this as a critique and more as a comment on how we tend to view and talk about relationships. To me, what Luke did was wrong–cheating, manipulating, being a generally narcissistic and megalomaniacal ass. What Holly did was human and oh-so-familiar for anyone who has ever been in a relationship they want to believe is good, but is actually toxic. Should she have left? Probably. But love is weird and gives us blinders. Also, I think it’s important to note that because of early critiques like yours, she probably wanted to prove the naysayers wrong. I think we have a tendency to want to make things work, because the shame of failure–especially when others told her that this might happen–will make things exponentially worse. That’s my two cents, take it for what it is!

Also–Holly is clearly gorgeous, but even if she were not a model, Luke’s comments about her body would be disgusting, body-shaming swill. The only way he becomes the Bachelor is if he wins the lottery, buys ABC, and installs himself as Bachelor.

Comment: Yeah, the last thing Holly is is a scorned lover. She even said in the podcast she’s met someone else, has moved on, and couldn’t be more happy. Which is what she needed. I’m glad she owned up to enabling him and letting him get away with the behavior time and time again. She’s not the first and won’t be the last to stick something out when it’s clear they should’ve gotten out sooner. But you live and learn.

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  1. jlal

    August 1, 2018 at 11:15 AM

    Colton just seems very immature. Also, once again who cares on what date he and Tia hooked up? Tia, if I remember correctly, also said they only spent a weekend together. Whether the date was in December, January, or February doesn’t really matter, especially now.

  2. ctrealitygirl

    August 1, 2018 at 12:00 PM

    I’m thinking that Colton’s recent social media rant may be partly him feeling frustrated/angry/jealous that he’s pretty much out of the race to be the next Bachelor. That was probably his main reason for wanting to get cast in the first place, and it’s all backfiring on him. Meanwhile, he’s stuck sitting at the MTA watching Jason sitting pretty. I never for a minute bought that he was sincere or that he was developing feelings for Becca…and certainly he wasn’t falling in love with her. All BS

  3. tinyred500

    August 1, 2018 at 12:48 PM

    I know I said Colton was immature previously, I still think he is. I doubt very much he’d be considered for the bachelor, so I’m still hopeful for Blake or even Jason.

    My personal feeling is, if contestants are sensitive to criticism about their time on the show and all that comes with it, they should deactivate or stay off social media till everything dies down. I know Olivia Caridi shut down all her social media accounts after all the terrible backlash she received for being the seasons villain. Speaking of which, she’s got Tierra (from Sean’s season) on as her podcast guest this week, so I’m going to listen to ole Sparkle! Lol 😀

    I like Southern Charm and found Cameran Eubanks really funny, I hope RS has her on a Podcast!

  4. jlal

    August 2, 2018 at 3:37 AM

    ctrealitygirl we agree once again, well all three of us really. I never for a second thought Colton was sincere; just never bought what he was selling. I think it was obvious from the start he was in it to build a brand and be the next bachelor. I realize most if not all have the same goal, some are just better at hiding their real motives.

    tinyred, agree about shutting down SM, but then I don’t get the whole SM thing anyway. No way in heck would I ever want all my personal information out there. I’m way too private.

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