So last night starts and we immediately get the rose ceremony. Roses were as follows:
Derek to Demi
Clay to Nicole
Wills to Katie
Kevin to Sydney (Huh? I don’t even remember them talking the first episode)
JPJ to Onyeka (same with this pairing)
Cam to Caelynn
Dylan to Hannah
Blake to Tayshia
Chris to Kristina
This sends Bibi, Jane, and Annaliese packing, and lets hope for all our sakes, this is the last we see of Annaliese. I don’t know how she doesn’t watch herself on these shows and get embarrassed how she acts. Is she not watching what we’re watching? I don’t get it. Annaliese, if production calls you next year to try Paradise again, just know they have zero interest in finding you a love story. They’re calling you so for a third season in a row, they can make sure you’re journey ends in heartbreak. I doubt she’ll listen to me and she probably will buy whatever production is selling, but just know it’s not going to happen on this show. You’re an attractive woman. Surely you can find someone to date who’s not on this show or even in this franchise. Just get away from it all. Please. For all of us.
Jordan Kimball enters the show and claims the island to be his. Pretty funny watching Jordan back on this show after seeing everything that happened last season to him. First, Jordan pulls aside Hannah, Nicole, and Kristina, and every conversation turns into what Blake’s been up to on the island. I’m sure they talked about other things, but that’s all we were shown. He asks Hannah on a date, she says yes, then has buyers remorse, and takes it back saying she’s already involved with two guys, she doesn’t need a third. So Jordan goes out with Nicole and they go zip lining. And oh yeah, talk more about Blake. All while back at camp, Clay is being asked how he feels about Nicole being on a date with another guy, and Clay drops in about 10 sports analogies of what it’s like. He can’t be mad at it, he knows that’s what this show is, and it’s too normal of an answer for someone on this show. Usually people flip out and start crying. Not Clay. He just makes sports analogies.
Once Jordan is done with his date, he sits down Blake to ask what the hell is going on since all these women wanna do is talk about him. When you were watching Becca’s season, who ever would’ve thought that someday Jordan Kimball would be the voice of reason in this franchise? I certainly didn’t. But that’s what he’s become. Did I see him properly lecturing Blake on how he should be handling himself? Yes. Yes I did. And oh yeah, Blake looks like he broke a toe earlier playing catch with Clay on the beach while Demi and Tayshia made fun of him for it. Good look. During this conversation Demi actually uttered this sentence: “That’s not the characteristics of a great person. Being selfish and manipulating people’s feelings.” Demi said that. Demi. The woman who had a whole storyline planned before coming on the show where she was absolutely dating someone else, yet went on the show, didn’t tell anyone she was dating someone pre-show, got involved with someone of the opposite sex, then will drop them like a hot potato when her girlfriend Kristian shows up next week. That’s rich. Demi can say all she wants about how she came to Paradise to explore her options and what not, but those that know all know it’s BS. The Kristian storyline was planned ahead of time and none of that happened organically. Demi is all about Demi.
