Hi Steve,
I hope you’ve been well! This is my first time writing. I thoroughly enjoy reading your column, and it’s always been enough to read and enjoy them. But after watching the Paradise finale, I just felt compelled to reach out because I was so incredibly frustrated.
I am talking in particular about the Blake Caelynn segment. While I know there are so many arguments for each side, and while I want to be respectful of everyone, I honestly couldn’t believe how the segment portrayed Caelynn in such a positive way and still crucified Blake about releasing the text messages. I know you said production will always back Caelynn for some reason and I get it, but it was so frustrating I honestly deleted it, and refused to watch the end of it. Which I have never done for any season in the past.
I am all for women empowerment and equality and making sure they are heard, but I don’t believe that gives us a free pass to do whatever we want, say things that aren’t true, and still try to play the victim card. To me that just isn’t right. It is no secret that I am on Team Blake, he needed to do what he did to make sure she didn’t smear his character, and yet she is still being put on a pedestal. It is clear from her past seasons she is super manipulative and will say whatever she needs to in order to paint herself in a positive light. And to say that Blake releasing the text messages was the most violated and disgusted she has ever felt-she’s a sexual assault victim, so that comment to me minimizes her past assault and those that others have experienced. All in order to make Blake look like the bad guy.
I know I’m beating a dead horse with this, but I am just so incredibly frustrated that she can continue to act this way and have no repercussions and be painted in such a positive light. It’s just frustrating for me. I wish I knew why the producers decided to go in this direction with editing and their backing of her, it just doesn’t seem right to me.
Thanks for letting me get this off my chest! Take care.
Comment: A lot of people feel the way you do. She’s definitely gotten a pass on her behavior on BIP. The good thing is, we don’t have to hear about her for a while. Until the inevitable break up with Dean, I can’t imagine why she’d be covered for anything by media outlets.
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Oh Steve- I finally figured out who Peter reminds me of… Ethan Embry! He of Vegas Vacation, Empire Records and Can’t Hardly Wait. Now that I see it I can’t unsee it. I’m waiting for him to say “I put in a dollar, I won a car!” But it does explain the immediate affability people feel about him. We’ll see how he screws that up. No questions here, you’re just the only person I can share this with. Thanks for just being you. K
Comment: A little bit. And with “Can’t Hardly Wait” being one of the most underrated teen movies of my generation that I’ve seen numerous times, if we’re gonna compare Peter to Ethan Embry, well, then I hate Peter because he scored Jennifer Love Hewitt in her prime. I think “Can’t Hardly Wait” was peak JLH. Good Lord.
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Any info about why Demi and Kristian were not included in the press tour with the other engaged couples??
Comment: I mean, Demi went on “Ellen.” I’d say that’s a pretty big deal. And I think they were both on GMA last week, weren’t they?
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Hi Steve!
Still a loyal reader, despite not having watched an episode since JoJo’s season. Your column is the only fun way to consume the drama. Got a few for you today…
1. What are your thoughts on Mike Fleiss’s now ex-wife dropping the assault allegations? I think it’s so damaging for women when this happens. I understand that money helps and people want to “put it all behind them” but this just enables abusers to keep doing what they do, and allows for more women to be hurt by them. Unfortunately in cases like that, it happens far too often. More than we even know about.
2. The source who gave you the original Jason Mesnick spoiler, are they still a source for you today? Nope. It was really the one and only thing they ever told me spoiler-wise I believe.
3. Did you ever get Rachel and Bryan’s address to send a wedding gift? (If not, here’s an excuse to appeal for info again, ha) Yes, I did. They received it last week according to the Crate and Barrel email I received after it was shipped.
4. What are your Vegas odds on Chris Lane and Lauren Bushnell still being together 3 years from now? Tough one. Even money.
5. It’s been going around the web that Chase McNary is trying to get free housing in exchange for being a “live-in social influencer.” Is this story legit, and if so, can you dig up any additional info? As a long-time Denver resident, I’m curious to know more – and as a human, I’m appalled.
Comment: I saw that floating around, but didn’t dig into it. I don’t see why it’d be made up. These contestants do stuff like that all the time. Nothing about that surprised me.
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Do you think ABC is prepping us to make Wells the new Chris Harrison once CH retires? Seems like they are trying to familiarize him with everyone. What are your thoughts?
Comment: I don’t think this show will ever be without Chris Harrison as the host.
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Reader email: When Tayshia visited JPJ at his home, was that his house or his parents house or a rented place or what? The interior decor didn’t look like a 24 yr old lived there.
Comment: I highly doubt that was his house.
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Hi Steve,
I found your site about 12 years ago when I was living in Europe when I wasn’t able watch Bachelor/Bachelorette. I enjoyed it then and continue to do so. I understand that sometimes you do receive incorrect info and that is the way it goes. I’ve never blamed you.
After listening to your podcast with Jennifer Pozner I can understand why they picked Peter (ugh) for the Bachelor. He fits the role to a T and it also explains why Harrison could “see a difference between Peter and Jed’s actions”. Personally, I don’t see that big of a difference as he dumped a girl and lied about the reasons why right before going on the Bachelorette. As per J. Pozner, Peter checks off Fleiss’ check list — disrespectful to women (as per above, and that he was dating another woman at the same time) successful, Caucasian, good career, financially successful, and good-looking (not in my book). Anyone who refers to his car, especially a Mercedes, as his “baby” is nauseating in my book. Peter will follow the rules, be the “yes” man, state the canned lines, lack personality and lack the flair for life that Hannah displayed. As you mentioned there will be numerous references to the windmills — which, will all be derogatory to Hannah (the poor girl who couldn’t find a husband) and women in general. Thank you, Ms. Pozner for opening my eyes.
All of the above explains why and per the Ms. Pozner’s podcast, why Mike wasn’t cast or possibly interviewed. From what I have seen of Mike, he has personality and standards. He wouldn’t be a yes man, has standards — he called people out to apologize, doesn’t put up with crap and probably wouldn’t have used the standard responses/lines. Then of course there is the obvious — he isn’t Caucasian. He would have given the show some life.
Obviously, you have the inside scoop on these two guys — do you disagree? Well, on the surface it’s easy to dismiss the Peter/Calee relationship bc he was comparing it to what Jed did. Yes, Peter was broken up with Calee and Jed wasn’t. So if that’s the only comparison you’re making, then yeah, they’re different. But it goes deeper than that. However, it was almost a year ago now, Peter is now the Bachelor, and basically no one wants to hear about it anymore unfortunately.
As for the Mike stuff, I’m not as sold on him as the Bachelor as a lot of people were. Like I said earlier, nice guy, but I don’t necessarily see much else there.
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I would like to say that I won’t be watching Bachelor, but I know that is a lie. I must admit I enjoy watching and chuckling knowing your spoilers. I’ll also be looking for the clues of the scripting as per Ms. Pozner’s podcast.
I do have one question regarding Blake. On Becca’s season he appeared to be fairly level headed and a genuine person. Now he appears to be somewhat of a train wreck. Did the whole “Bachelor Nation” stuff go to his head or was I wrong in my original assessment? I agree, that Blake had to post the tweets between him and Caelynn to show his side. She is extremely manipulative!
Thank you for all you do! Love, your work and podcasts!
Comment: Just hearing him speak on the situation, and reading his few IG posts about this show, needless to say he hit a pretty low point during all of this. The guy seemed miserable.
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Hey Steve!!!
First-time emailer, long-time reader (since Juan Pablo’s season!). I try to convince my friends that it’s so much more fun to watch the show while knowing your spoilers, but most of them haven’t listened yet. Especially because your recaps are hilarious!
Just a few random things I’ve been meaning to e-mail you about as Hannah’s season went on:
1) I can’t remember exactly when this happened (I think it was when all the Jed/Haley stuff came out), but a while ago you used the phrase “great googly moogly” to open up one of your columns and I just had to tell you how much I loved that! hahaha such a great and underused phrase that I forgot about! Found myself saying it the rest of the summer. I totally forgot where that came from. I wanna say it was a commercial back in the day, right?
2) I was listening to one of your more recent podcasts and you mentioned you were going to try and have Sharleen Joynt on a podcast at the end of each Bachelor/Bachelorette season to do a sort of re-cap. I listened to your podcast with Sharleen after Colton’s season, but I don’t believe there was ever a podcast with her after Hannah’s season. Did things just get too busy/schedules not align? I would have loved to hear her thoughts on Hannah’s season, but I totally understand how it’s tough to plan. Her insight is so fascinating and I just LOVE her take on the show!! I read her blog, but it’s always fun to hear her verbalize her thoughts and hear you two talk it out! Sharleen, Clare, and Olivia are my faves from the franchise so I love that you’ve done multiple podcasts with each of them! I think Sharleen was worn out from Hannah’s season, and had expressed her opinions on it 3 times a week every week during her season with her Flare recap, her Flare vlog, and her own website, and she just felt everything about the season was already on her site and she’d be repeating herself.
3) Speaking of your podcast, where did you get the idea/how did you find the jingle you play at the beginning and the end? I love it! It is just so fun. I could be in the worst mood ever, and then I hear that jingle and I’m like jamming out in my car haha Thanks for the feel good choice! It’s a song that’s always stuck with me. It’s from “Pretty in Pink,” another underrated John Hughes movie. I’d always liked it since seeing that move in the 80’s, and I kinda always told myself if I ever had some sort of radio show when I got older, that I somehow wanted to use that song as a music bumper. I’d always held onto that. Then when I started the podcast, I actually emailed the lead singer of that band, Jimmer Podrasky of the Rave-Ups, and asked if I could use the song for a podcast I was starting. He gave me his permission, and here we are. The song is called “Positively Lost Me.”
4) Finally, you’ve mentioned in the past that people get all confused when you post the wrong spoiler initially so I just wanted to share a story of when that happened to me. I was really busy during Rachel’s season and I wasn’t able to read your blog for the season’s latter half, so I never realized you changed the spoiler from Peter to Bryan. I was so surprised during the finale, but it was actually more fun that way and I was cracking up at how wrong I was because I was telling my mom all summer that it was Peter. But of course, the first thing I did was go to your blog and realized I missed something! Blows my mind that people don’t think to do that. Yeah, if someone only checks on the first day I release the spoilers, they’d miss that. However, once I did change the spoiler a couple weeks later to Bryan, the rest of the season, in anything I wrote, I referenced the fact she was with Bryan. So it wasn’t only I make one giant post making the correction then never address it again. So yeah, it kinda confuses me how people can get to the finale and if they’ve read me with any regularity, won’t know there was a change in the spoilers. It’s constantly referenced in recaps, Reader Emails, and podcasts.
Also, I didn’t read your blog during Des’ season, but honestly I would have loved to be surprised like that during the finale! It’s fun to change it up every once in a while haha And I think Des and Chris are the best and cutest couple out of this franchise. I wish they got more recognition!
Alright, that’s a wrap for me. Thanks for all your hard work Steve! So glad I stumbled upon your site 5 years ago. It’s cool to see how much the site has grown and your podcast is the best “bachelor related” one out there!
Comment: You wouldn’t have been the only one surprised by that ending. It sure was an interesting night to say the least.
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Hi!
How do you feel about Astrid’s engagement to Kevin? Changed your opinion on him? Have you talked to her? Surprised it no? You guys were friends, yes? I mean, she came on the podcast, and we would text on occasion. Never met her. I was surprised by it initially, but once she moved to Canada, that showed to me it was serious, so wasn’t surprised by an engagement after that. I don’t think she would’ve moved if an engagement wasn’t in the future. And that’s they way I take most of these relationships. Even if there’s an engagement at the end of this thing, it’s just dating to me until they move in together. Or at least move to the same city if they weren’t already.
What do you think of Jordan’s second marriage proposal to Jojo? They have a show and seen to be a lot happier and lasted longer than I thought. I know you revealed his past so I’m curious how your opinion might change on him/her. I really don’t know much about their relationship. Everything I said about them I said back 3 years ago when it was happening and what Jordan was doing pre-show. I stand by all of that. Did I think he’d change? No. And now they’ve been together 3 years so it looks like he has. Good for them.
Did you get Rachel a wedding present? I’d yuu couldn’t figure out what she wanted out or how to send it, just ask Astrid. They’re close, right? They seem to still be close. She might know. Yes. They received the gift last week.
What’s dumbass Jed up to now? His music career seems to have stalled again. Has he spoken to his ex gf that you interviewed since the show? I assume he’s still a f boy. No idea.
Thoughts on Chris b and Katie?? I think I would be pretty surprised if they got married.
What happened between Connor and Whitney? They didn’t last very long after paradise. Connor gave a statement to People and Whitney posted on her IG about it. I’d just take that as their reason.
Not a question, but please get Andi, Raven, Emily Ferguson and Reid Rosenthal on the podcast! Thanks!
Comment: Andi would never do it. I asked Reid years ago when I first started and he wasn’t really interested. He’s since gotten married and had a kid. I highly doubt he wants to now. Raven and Emily I think are possibilities in the future.
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1. I know there was so much campaigning for Mike to be the bachelor from fans and from other contestants and Rachel Lindsay said she’s bored of all the Peter like leads they cast and they missed their chance for the first black bachelor. While I agree the show needs diversity in the lead, I’m not mad with the choice. Why? Because Peter went far. Peter got his heart “broken.” Peter has a built in storyline. Most importantly, Peter is not out here doing photoshoots for absolutely no reason. Mike is. Maybe I’m in the minority here, but it’s super off putting when these contestants leave the show and buy their own hype and start posting headshots and staged photoshoot pictures on their instagrams and have their booking email already in their bio. Seize the opportunities, sure, but regarding Mike particularly, it just wouldn’t seem genuine. Even without the Demi Lovato of it all. Do you think producers take this into account? Like, oh Mike is maybe buying a little too much into the hype around him, leaning too much into the fame, maybe he’s not the best fit? I’d for sure if I was a producer haha. I know it’s probably weird and I’m being nitpick-y, but I just don’t get the uproar over them passing on Mike. I definitely think that could play a role.
2. Also, Mike left paradise with zero connections. And he had chances. Was that on purpose because he wanted another chance at the bachelor? It’s probably hard to put him in the bachelor role when he had two chances and struck out on both. I think Mike knew he had no chance to be the Bachelor if he left BIP with a girlfriend.
3. Do you think they released the girls early this season so that if things came up, they could get in front of it and remove whichever girls they need to before night one? So they don’t have another Jed situation? Or were they just trying to get in front of YOU this time? Lol. I think this might be standard for them now. It’s been two seasons in a row. I guess we’ll know when next season rolls around if they do it again, but I’m guessing they will. And yes, it’s being done to see if any stories pop up about contestants that they get vet out during the interview process.
4. Did I miss it or did they not ask Blake why he even asked Tayshia out when he was interested in Hannah? I feel like that was the one question on everyone’s mind and they couldn’t even ask him that.
Comment: If they did, it wasn’t shown. He addressed it on Rachel and Ali’s podcast, but I still don’t know if we know the real reason why he didn’t. He basically said he got in his own head and he should’ve asked Hannah out and it was a big mistake on his part.
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Send all links and emails to: steve@realitysteve.com. To follow me on Twitter, it’s: www.twitter.com/RealitySteve. Instagram name is “RealitySteve,” or join my Reality Steve Facebook Fan Page. Talk to you tomorrow.
