Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails,” Ratings, Dylan Speaks Out, Jed Doesn’t, & Matt Addresses Some Issues…Sort of

Photo Credit: ABC

Hi Steve!

Over the last few seasons I’ve gotten really into your content. I have a few questions that maybe you’re able to answer, and maybe you aren’t.

When you look for confirmations for your spoilers, generally who can confirm for you? Is it contestants? Producers? Families? I don’t reveal who tells me stuff or where I go to confirm it.

Why don’t you post the things you hear about the contestants about their lives? I know you’ve mentioned how this season particularly has less-than-great women. Even if it’s just, “Hey, here’s what I’m hearing, take it for what you will,” it would be super interesting. Because I absolutely, 1000% get blamed for it. Even if I preface it with what you just said, it doesn’t matter. It becomes “Reality Steve said this about this contestant.” Facts be damned.

Do you think what went on in the house was bullying? I just see it as cattiness. Absolutely it was bullying. Was MJ’s “Varsity vs JV” comment itself bullying? No, to me that was just being catty. Was the meaning behind it that there was a superior “group” there vs others bullying? Eh. I’d say it was close. Bordering on bullying and/or just being a mean girl. Was MJ’s attack on Jessenia bullying? Yes. Was basically everything Victoria did bullying? Yes.

Why does it seem like all of social media is supportive of Sarah all of a sudden? She clearly had ulterior motives on the show- obvious. Do former contestants or leads sign contracts that they can’t hate on the cast? Why are all former contestants so supportive of her??? Doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see through her. I’m sure they have their reasons. I think they were supportive over the dad issue. I doubt they’re being supportive because they believe the story about her ex, DJ Spinarooni.

On another note, Victoria is absolutely my favorite villain this show has had. Usually I buy into the hatred, but I find her hilarious and her one-liners make the show so entertaining. In a group of women that I find to be VERY boring as a whole, we need a little something to spice it up. Even the front-runners as of now are serving me absolutely nothing. All boring.

Thanks for your insights!!!

Comment: You’re definitely in the minority. Victoria’s act was sad, pathetic, and tired. Glad she’s gone.

Hey Steve! A few questions this week…

1. I know you’re aware of Deumoix and obviously it’s not vetted information and a bunch of it is BS. But this week they posted that a bachelor cast member has been dating a much younger IG influencer and that he has no idea that she has been documenting their entire relationship on Tik Tok. The confusing part was that their subject line was “summer(house) lovin'” referencing the Bravo show. Thought of Nick Viall at first but Natalie isn’t on Tik Tok much. Any idea who this person could be talking about? No.

2. Jade & Tanner and Sean & Catherine just celebrated anniversaries. It’s honestly very hard to ever think any of these couples will even make it down the aisle, so I’m happy for them, but which couple has actually shocked you by their breakup? Or maybe not shocked, but a couple who you thought would at least make it down the aisle and never did? Ashley & JP. As for ones who were engaged and broke up, I can’t say any truly shocked me, because you’re in the minority if you actually make it through all this.

3. Finally, Buccs or Chiefs?

Comment: I still haven’t decided. I need to hurry up, I know.

Hello Steve,

Thanks for your great blog and IG live. I am new to this Bachelor thing — yes, I live under a rock — so, can you shed some very basic Bachelor lore with me?

Does the order the gals are called during the Rose Ceremony indicate the Bachelor’s relative interest in the Rose recipients? Victoria was called last a few times — but not on the last Ceremony. Does that mean she moved up in his estimation (though the kissing bandit didn’t kiss on her)?

Comment: No. What is shown on TV is not necessarily the order shown on when they filmed. It’s done for TV purposes.

This probably won’t make tomorrow’s column, but I can’t watch live so I usually don’t have the option of emailing you my thoughts earlier. I love your recaps. Honestly, your column is probably the only reason I’m still interested in Bachelor World.

I believe there are three types of “OG” people in the Bachelor house right now:

(1) The bullies (Anna, Victoria, and Kit have taken the primary roles here)
(2) The uncomfortable followers (They won’t actively participate in the jokes, and will be cordial to the victims- perhaps even empathize with them- but don’t have the balls to stand up to the bullies.)
(3) The heroes (Katie is getting the primary edit for this, but I saw Serena P welcome the girls as well. (She apologized to them for the awkwardness.))

The hardest part of watching it is knowing most of us would probably sit in category #2. And though it isn’t shown, I think those girls are just as bad. We don’t know who fits into this category, because just as some of the bullying was left out, I’m sure some of the kindness was left out. But we even saw Abigail laughing beside Victoria when Victoria told Brittany to go home. When you laugh at the bullying, it is only encouraging it.

Thus far, I love Abigail based on her edit, and I am in no way accusing her because I don’t know how she behaved. It wasn’t really shown. It is just sad that more people weren’t willing to get involved and say, “Hey, this isn’t okay.”

It is literally high school… except worse because in high school, at least you get to go home and not spend 24/7 with the bullies. Can someone explain what makes a girl “serial-killer weird?”

And those bullies are going to be allowed to go on the apology tours, they will still get their insta followers, and get sponsorships. It is gross.

Hopefully, the mean girls go home next week…. although we might not have a show anymore.

Comment: Looks like most are gone, as I think now MJ goes home on the 2 on 1 with Jessenia. Although next week we now see Serena C jumping in Katie’s business calling her an arsonist, so we may not be done just yet.

Hi Steve,

Have you noticed how much Anna Redman looks like a younger blonde version of Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer. As a Michigan resident, I noticed and can’t unsee it. All of my friends think they look alike now, like she could be Anna’s mom. If Gretchen Whitmer came up and punched me in the face, I wouldn’t have a clue who it was. But if you say so.

Did all of the families of the final four girls in Matt’s season fly out to Nemocolin to do hometown dates? Any hiccups you’ve been told about? Did anyone not want to go? They all went as far as I know.

You said the other day that Matt lets Michelle go before the final rose ceremony. How did production let that happen? Was it producer manipulation or not? I’m sure producers were involved.

Thoughts on next bachelorette? I think Abigail has a good shot as long as she finishes top 5 like you have said. Any other options? Michelle?? Or a girl from a past season. Serena is only 22. I really don’t know because I haven’t heard anything yet. As Ashley and I talked about on the live last night, while we like Abigail, we also think she might not be ready for that lead role and what it will entail. Ashley wants to protect her, and I see too many dbags coming on and causing unnecessary drama.

This isn’t a question, but I was looking through Queen Victoria’s IG tonight (Tuesday Jan 26 11:25 pm) and she literally turned it private while I was looking.. too much backlash for her from fans, I guess. I don’t follow her and thought it was funny a sm influencer would actually turn her IG private.

Thanks for all you do!!

Comment: Yeah, she’s all over the map as I laid out in yesterday’s column.

Hi Steve,

I have some items for reader emails. We’ll go with the much higher quality TV first: Survivor.

You had a reader write in a few weeks back asking about new Survivor seasons to watch when he or she had finished those on Netflix. Rob Has a Podcast (which you know from Stephen, and I vaguely remember Melissa Denny as a guest?) put out an episode last month about which Survivor seasons a newcomer should watch after Cagayan and Heroes vs Villains. Mike and Shannon all had different conclusions but hopefully this gets back to your earlier reader. The podcast is available in a lot of the main places, but also on the RHAP website: Melissa came on actually to discuss Big Brother, but yes, that’s your go to place for all things Survivor.

And here’s a quick Bachelor question. If they announce the Bachelorette lead soon, do you anticipate it would be someone who is still on the show? I get your point that it likely cannot be Michelle; but will they pull a Rachel announcement and announce someone who is still on at that point in the season airing, and give away that the person isn’t the final one? I reread an article from Rachel’s announcement tonight and forgot how mad people were when that happened. If the show didn’t wish to go through that again, it could lend more likelihood to someone like Katie who is doesn’t get too close to the end of the season. It’s not out of the question. It’s rare, but it has been done before. We just don’t know exactly when the announcement is coming.

Also, I just want to express that there are people out there who don’t see much of an issue with hearing from people’s exes. Very rarely are breakups and issues caused by one party entirely; and both people have a version of how they experienced it that isn’t identical to their partner’s. I don’t agree with giving a platform to someone perpetrating abuse or something similar but, as far as we know, this wasn’t the case with Josh (and not Marie, who wasn’t speaking about herself). In the cases of run-of-the-mill breakups, I don’t understand how people reconcile saying that the ex has the right to speak but then wanting to police within what space someone can do that speaking – in other words, not on your podcast. If both people were in Bachelor Nation, and you had one on, I doubt anyone would complain but that’s the same thing ultimately (except both parties are TV-famous).

Have a good evening!

Comment: I agree. It’s ridiculous some of the arguments that came about, because their anger lost focus. It was directed at me for having them on. But when I had on exes they agreed with, no one batted an eye. It’s because of who it was, who they were speaking about (Tayshia, someone that is beloved in the franchise), and what they said. Which is fine. I’m ok with people not agreeing with some of what Josh said. That’s fine. I didn’t agree with everything he said either. But I did nothing wrong by giving him a forum to speak. Just like I didn’t for Memphis’ ex, or Arie’s, or Peter Kraus’, or any other ex I’ve had on. It’s your decision to listen and make your decision on you choose to believe more, but I don’t feel I’m doing anything wrong by letting them speak.

Hi Steve,

Hope it’s not too late to turn a question in for Reader Emails! I apologize if you’ve answered this question before…

I just watched Monday’s episode last night and noticed that Chris Harrison said that they received a “record number of applicants” for Matt’s season, which is why they decided to bring in additional women. Do you think this is actually true or just more hyperbole? I know he is the first black Bachelor, but he was never featured on a season before so I have a hard time believing there were actually a record number of applicants, especially in a Covid year with no opportunities for travel.

Thanks for all you do! You are the only reason I still watch this ridiculous show.

Comment: Yeah, no. That’s a line they’ve used so many times over the years, that the more they use it, the less effective, or true, it is. Why? Because it’s such an easy blanked statement to make when you don’t have to provide any proof to it. I don’t put any stock into that. The average fan who watches this show didn’t have a clue who Matt James was.

Hi RS,

There are SO many people for them to cast on this summer’s Bachelor in Paradise: Peter Pilot’s women, the men from Clare/Tayshia’s season, Matt’s girls — plus all the eligible people from previous seasons.

Do you think the approach will be different? Will it be more “competitive” to be cast on BIP? Or do you think the season will have a larger cast or run for longer? Thanks!!

Comment: I think the amount of people who show up on BIP will be roughly the same. Usually anywhere from 30-34 people show up at some point during the show. I think that stays the same. I just think they have such a top heavy pool to choose from that even after their OG cast of 16-18, then next 10-12 in will all be people who I think the audience will absolutely be excited for, or are at least relevant.

I would love to see Hannah Ann sluss as the next bachelorette. The way she put Peter in his place proves shes a bad ass.

Perhaps since they are filming in Canada and serena pitt is from canada she might be the bachelorette?

By the way, people in canada are pissed that they are bringing Americans over to film in Canada when we cant even leave our homes

Comment: I don’t know if it’ll be Hannah Ann. I just listed her a one of the few possibilities from a recent season. I don’t think Serena being from Canada has any bearing on anything. Especially since now they’re not filming there. I don’t think it hurt her chances any more or any less whether it was filming there or not.

Hey Steve!

Ok, so I really could use a little help clarifying something everyone keeps bringing up. I am a life long watcher of the Bachelor nation shows and I know that there are multiple bachelors that do not follow the “returning” character as the lead. Some examples:

Seasons 1-3 and 5-12 are not repeated characters they are “new” bachelors who had not been apart of the series before. Bob guiney was bachelor season 4, and Jason M was season 13 where it kicked off the “modern” era of bachelor? I know without a doubt, the “prince of season 9 was never in bachelor or the Dr or the first pilot, or Charlie O’Connell? Please help me. What am I missing? Thank you!!!!!!

Love your IG lives, so devastated I was busy tuesday and it didn’t save. It’s the best ever!

Take care!

Comment: Well good news, last night’s did. I think most will. Just a glitch sometimes, that’s all.

I don’t think you’re missing anything. Ever since Jason’s season, up until Matt’s, every “Bachelor” was from a previous season.

Hi Steve,

I listened to the Nick podcast and wanted to reach out on a few things. First, with respect to the Demi issue, I think you’re accepting too much fault in that situation. She knowingly went on a television show where her relationship was being filmed and would be broadcasted to the world. So at the least, she knew that her relationship was going to be made public at some point in the future. More than that though, she went on a television show where spoilers are a regular part of the show, so she knew or should have known that what she was filming could be made public before it aired on television. I appreciate the sensitivity around her situation, but I do think you had fair reason to believe you were acting appropriately. I don’t believe I’ve taken any fault because as you clearly stated, for those reasons, it’s exactly why I don’t think I did anything wrong. It’s know-it-alls opinion that I handled it incredibly wrong and never should’ve reported anything. To each their own I guess.

Second, I think your argument regarding the contestants’ contract is misplaced. Saying that it’s the worst contract in the world ignores some of the basic legal protections any reality show needs to avoid unnecessary litigation. The contract is certainly very broad in allowing the show to misrepresent, cast in a false light, etc. However, these statements are necessary for legal protection for the show even in the most benign circumstances of editing. Any conversation that is not shown in full could be arguably showing a contestant in a false light or misrepresenting what actually happened. So without those provisions, the show would be exposed to tons of litigation. Of course, there’s also the argument that this is a television show that contestants willingly participate in. If you don’t want to risk being misrepresented, don’t go on the show. That said, I agree that the show takes its portrayal of contestants and misrepresentations too far and arguably abuses the power with which it has under the contract. I think your beef is better directed at those in charge of the show rather than the actual contract.

Keep fighting the good fight!

Comment: Yes, it absolutely abuses their power. And yes, if you don’t want to ever possibly be shown in a negative light, don’t go on the show. However, we know that’s not realistic for someone who’s going through the process. If you don’t know by now, that’s on you.

Hi Steve,

Been running some thoughts that I wanted to pass along/ask.

To enter Canada you must have a negative COVID test 3 days before your flight. Then newly announced today (Friday) upon arrival you must quarantine at a hotel (at your own expense) for at least 3 days AND a negative covid test, then you still have the rest of the 14 day mandatory quarantine period for all people entering the country.

Looking at these protocols wondering how they would convince someone like Wells, Ashley I or Ben to come up for one day of filming. Unless they also get promised a free vacation out of it and can stay around afterwards to enjoy all that Jasper has to offer. Same applies for the “hometown” family dates. Well, we don’t have to worry about that anymore since they’re no longer filming there. However, if they were, I think we wouldn’t have seen the cameos from those types of alumni for the exact reasons you mentioned. Ashley and I talked about the hometown visits, and yes, that would’ve definitely been quite different for sure having them be there for 2 weeks while seemingly the lead would’ve still had 10-12 guys left, yet, her final 4’s parents would’ve been waiting. I’m sure once guys #5-12 got eliminated, they’d feel pretty stupid knowing they never really had a chance.

But, all for naught now.

Now on to Jasper and Alberta.

In terms of regulations Alberta is like Florida, the Premier (aka Governor) is really doing the bare minimum to prevent the spread. It is running one of the highest numbers per capita of COVID in Canada. Alberta was one of the NHL hub cities for the playoffs at the end of last year. It will be home to a curling bubble, and was to host an international skiing bubble but they cancelled that.

Fairmont Jasper as a resort is beautiful, and will be very wintery. It is essentially within the townsite of Jasper proper. So I could see some opportunity for group dates wandering through town like tourists.
Clearly all the winter sports: Skating (figure and Speed), skiing (downhill and X-country), snowboarding, curling, hockey would be ideas. Also looking at Snowshoeing, Tubing, Sledding. They would clearly do the glacier Snow Cat tour (Sean and Catherine already did it). I presume a helicopter tour (a la Ali, Kasey and Rego). Some sort of spa date. Perhaps ziplining. But really not a lot to do there. Ice climbing, polar bear dips (thanks Tierra). Snowball fights? Jasper is far enough north that they could reasonably see the Northern lights provided the weather and aurora forecast lined up. There is a famous stretch of highway nearby that they could do a mini sightseeing tour The Icefields Parkway.

Thoughts on bringing people in
Currently in Canada
Jillian Harris
Kevin and Astrid (if they are still even together)
Serena P

More of reach:
Justin rated R Rego (I mean they did contact him this summer for the GOAT stuff)
That girl Michela, or Mykenna from Peters season,
Benoit (formerly engaged to Clare)
Jasmine Lorimer the Canadian Bachelorette lead who was engaged to Kevin.

and then clearly you have the prominent Canadians who are now in the States and would have to go through the quarantine process but I could see them wanting to as a way to visit their families:
Sharleen (although she has an opera contract and not sure how long that would last).

I think because Jasper is such a small town you will be getting more info from there. It does have a resident population.

Anyhoo just wanted to pass on some info ask some questions. I’m not from Jasper or Alberta, I’m from Vancouver but have travelled extensively and just wanted to send that your way, so you can have some context as I know you’ve never visited.

Hope this finds you safe healthy and well.


Comment: Unfortunately this email was sent in before yesterday’s information I received that Canada is now out for “Bachelorette” filming after their tighter COVID restrictions were laid out last week. They are now looking at US resorts.

Steve since tayshia said that’s she’ll be on LA for the week and zac is there with her as well , do u think that they might get a small AFR segment?

Comment: Probably an excellent chance of that happening. I’d be shocked if they aren’t on the WTA.



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