Reality Steve

Bachelor in Paradise 7

“Reader Emails,” “Bachelor in Paradise” Episode 8 Thoughts, & “Bachelor” Talk

Photo Credit: ABC

Hey Steve,

I realize I am late here but I have been wondering… why do you think they are exposing people/franchise more this season than previous? The follower counts, clout, boom boom room hookups? This can’t be the first season this was ever brought up but seems like production or whoever behind the scenes is brining more things to light. Wondering if you had any thoughts on this.

Comment: They need to. It shows at least a little more transparency, and it’d really be doing a disservice to never talk about it. It’s what the show has become. Denying its existence would be ignorant and treating your audience like fools.

Hi Steve,

Long time reader first time emailing. I started watching Bachelorette during Becca’s season. I personally watch The Bachelor/Bachelorette to enjoy BIP even more. My question is I have found that when someone is a “villain” on their season some go on BIP for a redemption arc. I couldn’t stand Jordan on Becca’s season but found him to be fun to watch on his first season of Paradise. Watching the current season it seems that they are not showcasing redemption arcs but having the contestants look the same (waves at Queen Victoria) or make them look worse (Brendan and Piper). I am not even going to list She Who Shall Not Be Named. Do you feel this is the direction they are going to go in from now on? Or since it’s been two years since BIP aired they had so many contestants they couldn’t be bothered with a redemption arc or this is how it will be going forward? Thank you for all you do.

Comment: It’s tough to answer what next seasons BIP will do. But I’m glad they aren’t letting people go on their for a redemption arc. That always seemed silly to me. Oh sure, they’ll convince someone that’s why they want them cast, and that contestant will buy it hook, line, and sinker. But as long as they don’t follow through with it, I’m good with that.

Hey Steve!

I was browsing my discover page on Instagram, and came across the account @bacheloring. They included Katie’s promo, followed by Michelle’s promo. It is clear to see that a lot more effort was put into Michelle’s, and Katie’s looks kind of cheesy. What do you think?

Comment: I don’t think Katie cares. She even addressed this on social media I believe.


I wanted to respond to your live about the Brendan and Pieper situation. I think with people staying at home more and being stressed about COVID-19 there has become this focus on cancel culture. I am not a therapist but my take on it is people are angry and frustrated and one thing that helps is to project their feelings onto someone else.

So when people say they don’t like Brendan and they don’t believe his apology or it is not a good enough apology, they are not interested in forgiving him. They are not interested in giving him any grace. They just want to cancel him and dismiss him. I think that is what is happening.

It is unfortunate and it is not helpful. I don’t like the vitriol that has been happening in Bachelor Nation both onscreen and off.

As Jesus said “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.” We all make mistakes and like you said all anyone can do is apologize and try to do better.

Becca and Joe made fun of Chris for “following his heart”. Riley and Joe bullied Chris and ran him off the beach and no one seems that concerned about it. Chris was kissing Alana in front of Jessenia. It was not the best move but Tammy did the same thing kissing Thomas is front of Aaron and no one batted an eyelash.

It is true Chris made some mistakes but he didn’t deserve that kind of response. Why are people not demanding an apology from Joe and Riley and Becca?

There seems to be a hierarchy in Bachelor Nation and some people are above reproach.

Comment: Well, absolutely there’s a hierarchy. And the show has always been very cliquey. Usually the people who last long hang out with others who last long, and short lived contestants hang out with the others who went home early. Not to say there haven’t been examples where that hasn’t been the case, but those are few and far between.

And yes, I agree. People don’t want to hear apologies. They want to ignore and cancel. Am very well aware of that.

Hey Steve.

I just want to know your thoughts about this Tammy and Ivan not calling Brendan out situation. People have been so quick to cancel Ivan and Tammy last night because they feel like they didn’t respond the right way. It’s irritating me. Brendan posted on IG of him being in a pool of water HOURS before the show started. He said” here for the wrong reasons” or something like that. Ivan then commented “Savage mode”, and Tammy commented ” Dun, dun , dun.” Again, this was HOURS before the show started. Tammy then tweeted later that they were just as shocked as everyone else about Brendan’s remarks and behavior because they don’t know about private convos until they actually air. Ivan retweeted this, and I believe them. They both deleted those comments under Brendan’s IG after the fact. Yet, people still want to cancel them and say they are enablers, etc. What kind of foolishness is that? I agree, Ivan could have had a better response to Natasha when she said” even you gotta agree that’s f’d up”, and he seem uncomfortable and just kinda smiled it off. Yeah he could have had a better response, but I think he was just caught in the moment of not knowing what to say because he was kinda between a rock and a hard place if Brendan was his friend. For all we know he could have called him out but it wasn’t shown. Like these attacks against him and Tammy are unwarranted. What do you think? Thanks for letting me vent.

Comment: It’s Toxic Bachelor Nation doing what Toxic Bachelor Nation does. You’re guilty by association now in their eyes. If you like, still remain friends with, or comment on any page of a contestant who was problematic, then YOU’RE problematic as well. So ridiculous. This fan base is outta control.

Hey Steve,

Since the Winter Olympics are coming in February, do you think they’ll do Bachelor Winter Games again like they did in 2018?

Comment: I highly doubt it since the point of that show was seemingly to bring in international contestants, and I just don’t think international travel is gonna be a thing in a few months when that normally would film. The first season filmed in December and aired in February. I just don’t see that happening unless they eliminated the international contestants from it. But then is it really the Winter Olympics?

Hey Steve, I hope you are well.

I find Chatty Boards (Bekah) to be the most hypocritical person to exist in this franchise. It honestly makes me mad how they were calling you out for reporting tea on contestants and “ruining their lives” when they’re doing the same thing with Greg. Bekah even called Zac “creepy for no reason at all”. I’ve also realized the reason why people hate the Bachelor reddit. They all make fun of you for getting your spoilers wrong and are saying you’re done when none of them would have known Katie’s F4 if it weren’t for you. None of us thought Greg was even in the running for Bachelor until you spoiled it. They also run with whatever tea Bekah/Bachelornationscoop/Sophie Ross provide but crucify you for your “false reporting of Jenna/Victoria F”. Wash, rinse, repeat.

The second thing I hope you address is, I’ve been wondering what you think of the rumours of Greg being horrible/emotionally abusive to past girlfriends. Did the person who come to you ever backed their claims with receipts or proof? It’s interesting how they’re all claiming he screwed all of his ex-girlfriends over when I have proof that his most recent exes except for one are still following and liking him and his family’s stuff. I can email it to you if you want. I know you’ve changed the way you report on contestants after what happened with Demi, but with what you have on Greg, would you have felt that the claims are strong enough to report on them like you used to before? I’m only asking because I know you vet these things before reporting unlike Bachelornationscoop etc.

Hope you reply.

Comment: There’s nothing to report. Nobody wanted to put their name behind any accusations. Doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. Doesn’t mean it did. It means unless somebody wants to come forward themselves with their story, it’s not getting out – at least through me. I’m done being the middle person. It’s a lose-lose for me.


I think after the numbers on IG plummeted for some people on Bachelor on Paradise that Bachelor Nation may be hesitant to go on that show…and with good reason especially if they got a good edit on Bachelor or Bachelorette. It may not be worth the risk.

The hypocrisy of people like Grocery Store Joe and Riley giving people a hard time for being on Paradise only for followers is ridiculous. Everyone goes on the show for followers. It doesn’t mean that they don’t want to look for love as well. But to say that followers are not important to them is ludicrous. That is how they all make a living. Let’s be real.

Also, the Game of Roses podcast has pointed out that the people who came out of BIP with the biggest gain in followers so far — Natasha and Grocery Store Joe— also have podcasts that are official ABC bachelor supported podcasts. Coincidence?

I don’t think so.

Comment: The notion that Brendan and Pieper are the villains because they went on the island for followers and clout is missing the whole point. They’re villains because of how he used Natasha and how both of them seemingly didn’t care who they hurt or how their actions were perceived while they were there. The hypocrisy of anyone who goes on that show to get mad at someone else for being there for followers and clout is not lost on me. They all are. Just own it.

So you’re telling me if that show wasn’t televised, or if Instagram stopped doing ads, those people would still be there? Please.

Hey Steve,

Any work on casting rumors for BIP Canada?

I just know that you have a lot of Canadian readers/listeners who will be watching this fall starting October 10th. They have strongly hinted that there will be some familiar faces from the regular/US franchise that will be on the show and not just Canadian cast members.

Comment: This email was sent before BIP Canada’s Twitter account released the cast yesterday. Here was the thread:

I’d heard Kamil, Brendan, and Illeana were on it. I didn’t know about Angela, Caitlin, or Alex.

Hey Reality Steve,

I’ve never messaged you or anyone in BN before- despite being a die hard bachelor fan/it’s my get away from being a single mom and attorney. I just want to say thank you for your last podcast, it may have been said before, but it can’t be said enough- hateful comments are stupid, pointless, and only make the writer look silly.

Three other things-

(1) are Becca and Thomas still together? Yes. They break up on Paradise, but have since rekindled post-show and are dating.

(2) if bachelor nation stops following the cast, the cast won’t come on for followers (admittedly will never happen). No, it won’t.

(3) I just want to point out that many other bachelor podcasts have gone on at length about gaslighting and tried to determine whether Gregg gaslighted Katie or Brendan gaslighted Natasha. Gaslighting and want to say as a gal with a psych degree and a decade of experience as a licensed attorney- it is not a clinical term it’s a freaking colloquialism of popular culture referring to making someone question their own reality. While I don’t find either Gregg or brendan’s behavior to be abusive I think it’s fair to say Brendan made Natasha question the reality of their (lack of) relationship. I’m been the victim of a felonious assault (that led to prosecution and conviction) and I think it’s ridiculous to make Brendan out to be an abusive horrible human yet acknowledge that his actions are very disturbing.

Call me horrible but I’ve got my kindergarten gal watching with me and I hope the franchise continues!

Thanks for your bluntness- it’s refreshing.

PS – I am a total advocate of unfollowing Brendan (never followed him to begin with)

Comment: Good. That’s what most people should do. He apologized, most people hate it, they voiced they hated it, so we move on.

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