Dear Steve
I am writing to you during the season finale this evening. I am watching Gabby live on stage with Jesse and I can’t tell you the level of concern I have for this special human being.
I urge the whole nation to plead with ABC to make sure this beautiful person is given the help she needs with her issues that were clearly on display this evening. I have watched this show since inception and I have not to date seen someone in so much pain.
Please publish this as I fear we may lose this gorgeous girl that has everything to live for and can contribute to this world in a positive way.
Share with us what we can do to make sure we can keep this person safe until she is mentally strong enough to stand on her own two feet and live the life she deserves.
Thank you for putting this on a platform that reaches so many people. In addition, if anyone reading this knows Gabby, don’t leave her side and give her the emotional tenderness and help she is desperately crying out for at this tough time in her life.
Comment: I think what you express is pretty extreme, but I never want to comment on where someone is mentally on this show. We know Gabi was not in a good place Monday night, which is why I suggested that I hope she’s talking to someone. It’s a very sensitive topic. Gabi is being really hard on herself when she did nothing wrong. Her insecurities about herself are things she needs to really talk to someone about, because us on the outside (or at least most people that comment about Gabi), don’t see the Gabi that she does. I know it’s cliché, but she really needs to love herself before she gives her love to someone else in a relationship. I hope she does.
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Do you think they gave Gabi a bad edit last week and aired out her personal business because she was reading that book?
Comment: I don’t think that had anything to do with it.
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It’s the hypocrisy for me! I only saw what Dave Neal posted on YouTube about the whole Ria spoiler. But she was definitely not joking around or kidding. Why she even said anything when she wasn’t going to vet or try to confirm the spoiler is beyond me. And why should would even roll with Gomer Pyle Zach being a guy that would propose to Kaity at the end of his season and then leave her for a before hometown runnerup is ridiculous. He has demonstrated nothing but earnestness throughout his season. Consequently, her spoiler was already suspect. And to not confirm anything is even more ridiculous! That’s what I was alluding to in a prior email. Do you ever hear false spoilers? Like did anyone ever come to you with a different spoiler for who The Bachelorette would be? If so, how do you figure out which one is true? Either way, I think anyone saying you are taking Ria’s spoiler too seriously, is such a hypocrite. Given how seriously everyone takes your spoilers. Keep your head up!
Comment: The best answer is every spoiler is a case-by-case basis. The Charity as Bachelorette spoiler that I posted I knew was right based on who told it to me and how they knew. Same with Kaity as the winner. But yes, some things in the past that are told to me, the more vetting I do, the more I realize, “Well, this isn’t true.” That was my whole opinion on Ria. You just don’t run with something unless you know it to be true. Saying, “Here’s a rumor I heard but I have no idea if it’s true or not” is such irresponsible journalism. It’s exactly what Deux Moi does. All you’re doing is throwing something against a wall and hoping it sticks. Because if you’re right, you’re gonna tell everyone, “See, I told you.” And when it’s inevitably wrong, you hide behind “See, it wasn’t that serious. I told you I didn’t know if that was true.” Great, then why did you tell us? As I’ve said 100 times, if that’s how I reported things, you guys would crucify me.
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How often do the leads know their pick super early on? It was pretty obvious to me that Kaity was Zach’s favorite long before their final date together and surely the producers knew as well. Because Zach proved himself to be so earnest and decisive all season, with an inability to lie and hide his feelings, it must have been torture for him not to just cut the whole thing short like in a game of Clue and declare, ‘IT’S KAITY AND ME IN THAILAND WITH A DIAMOND RING.’ The show is so scripted, it wouldn’t make for good TV if the lead has a clear favorite, as we saw with Claire’s season, UNLESS something dramatic happens in the end and everything falls apart. My question: I wonder if you have any insight into what happens when a lead has made his/her pick early on? Do the producers push the lead to act as if they are into the others when they aren’t? Do you know of any leads who DID make their pick early, but had to hide it? Thank you for so many years of entertainment!
Comment: I think most of the time the leads know who they want fairly early on. But they have a show to put on so they can’t just leave and walk off the show. Well, except Clare was allowed to. But no, I don’t think every season the lead isn’t undecided until the night before final rose ceremony then makes their final decision. But they can’t say that. If you asked all of them 1-by-1 when they REALLY knew, and they were all being 100% honest, I’d say almost all of them would admit they knew much earlier in the season who they were picking.
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Hi Steve,
Ariel said last night on the hot seat that she was on the same page as Zach and wanted to hold off on sex in the fantasy suite. But that’s not what I remember… I thought I remember her saying that she was disappointed by Zach’s parameters, and I think as they were leaving their dinner, she said something like, ‘you never know what could happen tonight, we may have sex after all.’ Am I wrong?
Thanks!
Comment: Did she say that? I don’t remember her saying that. But then again, I forgot a lot of stuff that already happened which is why I had to go back and watch Gabi’s overnight date again and her on the ATFR yesterday. I fast forwarded through Ariel’s overnight, but I don’t remember her saying that. I do remember Gabi joking about “if Zach changes his mind, I’d be fine with that” with a giggle and a smile on her face. Something like that.
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Hi Steve-
Just wondering if Gabi has any legal recourse here against the producers? Or once you sign a contract with the Bachelor they can pretty much do what they want…?
As you stated production made a big thing out of Gabi and Zach’s overnight for the drama it created – ! (At Gabi’s expense)
Comment: None. This show owns you for a full year from the time the finale airs. It’s the worst contract you could possibly sign. But they don’t seem to care, or realize, what they’re getting into when they sign it because they just want to be on TV and aren’t looking at the long term game other than thinking they can be the next star to come out of the show.
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I wondered if anyone picked up on what Gabi said getting out of the limo at the final rose ceremony. Her heel sank in the dirt/mud and she said “don’t pull up here for Kaity”, indicating even more that she knew she wasn’t the one, because obviously she knew or thought she was there before Kaity. Yeah, we don’t know if she was saying that because she knew for sure. Or if she was just saying it in general in case Kaity was still showing up.
I do have a question, I’ve been meaning to ask, and you don’t have to respond to this if you prefer not to. I follow the Dear Shandy podcast and know that you and Sharleen are friends. Has it put a strain on the friendship due to her being close with Nick also?
Thanks as always
Comment: No.
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Hi Steve,
I don’t understand how Gabi didn’t know Zach had shared they had sex until the show aired. Kaity told Gabi at the rose ceremony that she already knew about it and then Gabi also spoke a lot about it in her own interviews with production. Did you pick up on that as well? Made no sense to me.
Comment: We don’t know that. I discuss that in detail in today’s Daily Roundup. But basically if you watch that clip, we hear Kaity’s voice say “I know you were the only other one” and we see that transcribed on the bottom of the screen. But if you look, you never see Kaity’s mouth move saying that, AND, the day after on her IG stories, Kaity told people that Gabi is her best friend from the show, that conversation had way more context to it, and for people to not jump to conclusions based on what the show aired. Maybe we’ll get a clearer definition to all that in the future, or maybe not. But I don’t think that’s what Kaity said to her at that rose ceremony.
