-Peter’s hometown date is up first (even though it was filmed last of the four) and it’s in Westlake Village, which is basically just a stones throw from the mansion. Hannah really seems to like Peter. And has really seemed to have a vision of him since she was a kid. “When I was playing at home with barbies, he’s who I imagined.” Easy there, Hannah. So he’s your Ken doll? Actually, I can kinda see that now. Makes a little more sense that Hannah sees Peter as a stiff, uptight, yuppie who shows off his car for chicks. Because c’mon, lets face it, Peter introducing his car as his “baby” to her just reeks of douchebaggery. Bragging about your car? Seriously? Is he a gear head? Young dudes in their 20’s with not a lot going for them introduce their cars to women as their “baby.” Get it together Petey. Not a good look.
-So Peter takes Hannah for a ride in his baby, and she’s checkin out the middle console. What does she find besides Altoids? A condom. You know who wasn’t happy about that? Trojan.
?Public service announcement? STORE CONDOMS IN A COOL, DRY PLACE: not in a car console ?… especially you, Pilot Pete! ??????????
— Trojan Brand Condoms (@TrojanCondoms) July 9, 2019
Yeah, Peter. Are you still in high school? Who keeps condoms in the middle console of their car that isn’t still a teenager? Lets see. What do I have in my middle console. Well, since I’m currently driving a rental we can’t go with that. But in my car being worked on right now? I had a pair of headphones in case I forget my air pods for the gym. I have loose change. I have Dave & Busters Power Cards for me and my niece and nephew, and a sunglasses case. Yep. That’s it. I believe I stopped storing condoms in there right around the time Boyz II Men was releasing “I’ll Make Love To You.” But you do you, Pete.
-Because Peter is a pilot…wait for it…wait for it…he’s gonna take her flying today. Why? “This gives us an opportunity for our relationship to soar.” See what he did there? He flies, they have a relationship, he wants it to take…forget it. I can’t with this. I’m really confused now. Is Peter going to be Sunroof Down Ken or Aviation Ken? Pick which lane you want to be in Peter and stay there. Luke wants you to. So Peter takes her up in his prop plane and they fly around LA and even over the mansion like he did in his intro video. And instead of, oh I don’t know, paying attention and flying a plane, Peter is getting all handsy and touching Hannah. I’m sorry. Please keep your hands to yourself, look straight ahead, put your hands on the wheel (or whatever the pilots hold), and do not distract yourself. I’ve seen “Airplane!” I know they have that blow up doll pilot, but I don’t trust that. You concentrate more on flying the plane than worrying about any hanky panky in the air. Question: Does Peter keep condoms in the cockpit too?
-When they meet with Peter’s parents, they are so excited to hear all about where Peter and Hannah have been this season. C’mon dad Peter and mother Barbara, quit pretending like you weren’t following along with spoilers all season. And brother Jack? Well, that kid was running his mouth all season to plenty of people so you knew damn well where they were at all season. But hey, good acting job anyway. I still think 98% of America bought it. Peter tells the family at dinner that he’s never brought someone home he felt so strongly for, and I’m sure that might’ve torn at the insides of the ex who won’t come forward. Then again, it’s not like it was Peter’s choice to bring Hannah home. It’s her choice that he made it to final four, not his. “But he could’ve eliminated himself if he didn’t want…” Please.
-It was either Peter’s mom or dad that said to Hannah, “When he gets all into you, it’s very hard for him to get out of that.” Ummmmm, are you suuuuuure about that one? Because from what I’ve seen in texts, it’s actually very easy for him to get out of something when he tells someone a week before he wants to move them to CA to be with him. But hey, then again, parents aren’t privy to every single conversation their kids have with members of the opposite sex, so I can’t say I’m too surprised they weren’t aware of that. But yeah, it happened. I just feel like watching this date, I still didn’t learn anything about the guy. He’s a pilot. He flys. We know that. We’ve known that from his intro video. What else is there? Oh yeah, he calls his car “baby” and has the sexual hygiene qualities of a teenager getting laid on the reg with his first girlfriend. Great. Is there anything else he can tell us about himself?