Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails” & The Tabloids Already Starting in on Nick

Photo Credit: ABC

Well that didn’t take long. Even before Nick was “officially” announced on the DWTS cast this morning, already Radar is running stories about him being a diva on set. If someone could please remove all sharp objects from Nick’s presence right now, that’d be great. Who knows if the story is true or not. My guess is it isn’t since it can’t possibly be that bad already, but the fact that it’s out there, and it’s a negative story about him which feeds into the persona that’s been painted of the guy that he’s out for fame and his ego is getting bigger and bigger with every TV appearance he does – this will drive him up a wall. Hey, this is what you signed up for. Don’t want negative things said about you whether they’re true or untrue? Then don’t put yourself out there. Most people let it slide off their back. Nick? Ummmmm, lets just say he handles things a bit differently. While he puts on this persona that things are great on the outside and he doesn’t let haters get to him, that couldn’t be more of an act. Stuff like this grinds his gears like no other and if he had any ties to Radar, that story would get taken down. But apparently he doesn’t. Oh well. Enjoy the next month or so Nick when everything you do on that show will be scrutinized. Hope you’re ready. For the record, judging by this cast, I think Nick’s only male competition will be Rashad Jennings. As for the women, he’s definitely not gonna beat Heather or Simone. But those thinking he’s gonna be out week 2 or 3 have another thing coming. He’s gonna be on a while.

Real quick follow up to yesterday’s opening remarks I made about the Oscars. I guess we have our answer that PricewaterhouseCooper’s admitted they gave Warren Beatty the wrong card and, well, someone’s gonna get fired over this. Probably that doofus who was snapping selfies backstage of Emma Stone right before he was supposed to hand Warren the card. Probably not to bright buddy. You might wanna start checking Craigslist for job openings. Can’t imagine that guy will be employed by them much longer.

Get your “Dr. Reality Steve” emails in for tomorrow. Right now I only have one. Lets try to get to 3 or 4 at least. With that said, tomorrow’s podcast guest will be a favorite I’m sure. A lot of stuff to talk about with this one. Looking forward to you all hearing podcast #15 being released tomorrow. I never want to jinx them anymore and we haven’t recorded it yet, so that’s why I’m not revealing who it is. I’m excited. If I had to guess, I’d say top 10 in the franchise.

Hi Steve,

Ok so we knew recently that Josh and Amanda were caught kissing after having a sushi even we are not sure at this point how is their relationship but he mentioned during ET live that they were talking a bit, do you think he is telling the truth? Cause I think they unfollowed each other on instagram and I wasn’t sure that they were still on speaking term I think Amanda mentioned this on January when she publicly announced their breakup, what do you think about this? I think it was two horny ex’s hooking up and nothing more than that.

Now let’s move on to Ben and Lauren, we both know for sure these days it seems that they didn’t really spend time that much with each other. I almost sure that they breakup but do you think that they are not allowed to breakup at this point cause they will be on the twins show? Cause I recall that “Grace” also breakup after their appearance on Ben and Lauren. Does my theory make any sense?

Comment: No. These couples can break up anytime they want to. Granted, most like to extend it out longer than they have to, but I don’t think the twins show is something that would prevent Ben & Lauren from making any announcement regarding their future. I think the two are completely separate.


I’m always curious to hear which girls you find most attractive each season, what are your top 5 from Nick’s? Including both strictly based on looks and then with personality included please ?

Thanks! You’re the best as always.

Comment: Now having watched everything up to this point, and taking anything into consideration, my five are (in no particular order): Liz, Danielle L., Kristina, Whitney, and Raven. Vanessa and Danielle M. would be my next two in case you were wondering.

What’s up Steve? The main two questions that might be in an Ask Steve are about former contestants. In an early season of Bachelor (I honestly forget which one because it was the first time seeing the show) they had a contestant named Trish who went a little psycho the episode after she was eliminated. What even happened to her? The other two contestants I’m wondering about are Wes (the singer from Jillian’s season of Bachelorette) and Justin Rego (the “wrestler” from another season. Wondering what happened to those two scumbags, mainly as I did backyard wrestling and am a musician now. I haven’t heard about either in years. It’s been at least 5 years since I’ve seen Wes. Last I spoke with him was after Gia’s death.

The controversial question I have that I don’t know if it will make a Q&A is about the shows as a whole. People made a big stink at first about there being no “minority” people on the show, so they put some on. Then it became focused on the lead was never a minority, so you have a Hispanic Bachelor. Then it became solely focused on black people had never had the lead before. The actual question is two parts: 1. Does it really matter to ABC anyway? It would be great from a human perspective, but is it just people complaining to complain? 2. Do you think Rachel being cast will silence those critics, or do you think the criticism will shift towards another specific race, religion, etc?

Comment: I don’t necessarily think criticism will shift now. Lets face it, for 33 seasons this has been a predominantly white show. It’s leads it’s contestants, it’s audience have all been white for the most part. There’s no denying that. Next season will definitely bring in a more diverse cast, but it’s not like she’s gonna have 20 black guys on her season. Not happening. I think they just needed to get with the times and try and make their show a little more realistic. Coincidence that their first black lead is the season right after UnREAL did it? Probably not. But also, I do think all the pressure from never having one probably added to it as well.

Hi Steve,

Just wondering what Bachelor (Bachelorette) tell all you would recommend? One that offers more truth than lies, or the one that depicts what really goes on behind the scenes.

Comment: You’ll never get the latter, so that’s not even an option. The Vanessa/Rachel fight (which is kind of a big deal when there’s only 5 people left in the house at that point), was completely swept under the rug and never brought up. If something like that happens when it’s episode 2 or 3 and there’s still 15-18 girls there, it’s easy to dismiss it because it becomes irrelevant to everything else going on. But that late in the game, right before hometowns, two of the favorites have a major disagreement with each other and you don’t show it and never address it? Don’t ever expect this show to give you the real story on anything. Hey, that’s what I’m here for.

Hi, Steve!

Okay, my email is completely going to be about…OLIVIA. So, I actually felt bad for her on Ben’s season, and the edit she got, with being naive about the experience and even how she got treated. She seemed distraught after the show aired (which she was very open about). She also seemed to give all of “Bachelor Nation” a big F-U. She said no to producers for BIP, and literally had nothing to do ANYTHING Bachelor related.

Now, she is seeming to be the epitome of every person who goes on this show. She sells insta product, has Bachelor “meet ups,” and “viewing parties” and hastags everything “bachelornation, bachelorfamily.” I guess my question is…what do you think her change of heart is with the everything Bachelor related? She seemed to completely distance herself, and now she is completely entrenched in it just like every other contestant. I personally like Olivia a lot…so I was more just curious your opinion on why the change?

Also, I think at this point it’s safe to say she will be on BIP this summer? Selfishly, I sure hope so! I would also love for her to be on the podcast (your podcasts are excellent).

Thank you!!!

Comment: All excellent points you have and ones we probably will never get answers to. I really have no idea what her thinking is with all this.

Hey Steve!

I started watching the show during Brad Womack’s first season, but I’ve been a fan of your site probably since Ashley’s season, which is when I think I started reading. So I’ve been reading for quite some time! It’s interesting because most of my friends think I’m bonkers for reading the spoilers, but that doesn’t mean I don’t watch the show. I still watch and in fact I almost prefer knowing so that I can see how everything evolves throughout the season. It’s interesting. Nonetheless it’s funny because even though my friends don’t want to know the spoilers, they often ask me how behind the scenes operations work there and how certain things happen. So it’s neat being their go to gal.

A couple thoughts and questions:

1) I’ve recently began watching Unreal and find it extremely fascinating. Although it’s clearly an overly dramatized version of The Bachelor, there still is a lot of truth being conveyed. And I think if people watch it through this lens, then they could get a lot out of it. Especially after listening to your recent podcast with JJ and hearing how producers manipulated the JJ/Clint story. Obviously like I said, Unreal is exaggerated, but it’s still a decent look inside what’s going on. Exactly. It’s exaggerated for TV, but it’s based in truth since the creator worked on the “Bachelor” for 9 seasons. She’s not just making up how stuff works on a dating show out of thin air.

2) So throwing it back a year ago to Ben’s season, I remember reading articles you wrote about Caila and how she wasn’t all that liked and kind of overprotective of her image (aka fake). I specifically recall someone emailing you saying that they saw her at the Ohio casting call and I just thought I’d mention that I’m also pretty sure I saw her there as well. She was dressed up in this short glittery dress with her hair in voluminous waves and confidently walking out of the audition, I definitely remember this moment and thinking wow, this girl is overdoing it haha and sure enough she got selected. Interestingly enough (and people can either believe me or not) I literally was there “for the right reasons.” I really adore Ben and how thoughtful and kind he is and how he carried himself on Kaitlyn’s season. And from reading your site, I knew it would likely be him. He seems so selfless and has the biggest heart and I actually felt we’d be compatible, but sadly I didn’t fit the calculated image or persona they’re going for, since this show is all about appearances. Probably a good thing you didn’t make it. You don’t want to be a part of this sh** show.

3) Have you thought about making it a point to ask each former contestant that comes on your podcast how exactly they got on the show, what their process was like, and why they chose to do it? I’m always interested to hear contestants stories like if they submitted themselves or friends convinced them to audition, etc. A few of them I have. Maybe not the exact details of how they got on, but JJ, Clare, Kacie, and Courtney definitely addressed it.

4) I also am not a fan of the compulsive product ads on Instagram. I really loved JJ’s take on it, especially because he’s got a child, but when it comes to many of the girls, I feel like they are now going on the show expecting these perks post-show. And it just seems pretty transparent to me. I find it pathetic and really respect the contestants that resume a normal lifestyle after the show ends, although they’re few and far between. I have a number of friends who feel the same way about all these product ads and you’ve talked about it a lot yourself, so I know it’s turning people away for sure. I’ve made it a point to unfollow many of these contestants just because I know how it works, more followers = more money and I just don’t feel like being another player in helping them to make more money and become more “famous” off of something so simple, easy, and glamorous for them to do. And then they’re the ones who reap the benefits, although JJ mentioned it’s not that lucrative. But still, you know the direction they’re all trying to head in with their blogs or becoming someone like Ali Fedotowski. Here’s another thing and I know I’m just being cynical now, but it’s irritating when I hear them complaining about negative comments or being bombarded by people in the store or not being able to do anything normal or not being able to date normal people and only ones in the franchise or in entertainment, cause I’m like you’re so transparent…you asked for this life! I can tell you’re loving it, you’re loving the attention, the “fame,” the sponsored traveling, and you’re soaking it all up! It’s almost disgusting. And JJ even admitted that none of them have worked to earn their fame and they’re getting to do all these grandiose things now because of it and have opportunities everywhere, which I find sickening, so stop complaining. And as he said, if they’re having such an issue with negative comments or living a normal life, then minimize or eliminate your social media like Ian and others do. It’s as simple as that. I agree. Something I’ve definitely harped on. They love the attention – except when it’s negative, then that’s all they harp on.

Okay rant over.

Regardless, I’m still addicted to the show because let’s be real, it is entertaining television. But just getting tired of what’s going on beyond the show. And tired that their casting has become more superficial over the years. Obviously they’ve always tried to cast attractive people, but I feel like in the earlier seasons we saw many more “normal” people and we’re lacking that nowadays.

Anyways, sorry for this ridiculously long email, but once I get started I tend to not be able to stop because I have too many thoughts! Thanks for your content though, I love the spoilers, all the inside information, and your insight.

Hey Steve,

Sorry, but as soon as I read something about The Bachelor it makes me ask more questions. I really hope I can try to go one week without asking questions.

1) When did they begin to let those who have kids be contestants on the show? Was Jason the first? Jason? No, people had kids on the show long before Jason did. There were over 15 seasons of contestants before Jason.

2) Are the ones with kids allowed to call their kids while on the show? And do the contestant give a phone number to a family member that they can be reached at in case of an emergency, like their mom or dad died? Yes and yes. They get to talk to their kid usually while a producer is sitting right next to them.

3) I was watching an interview with Kaitlyn and she was asked when she and Shawn are getting married, and she said, “we were in Hawaii and we thought about getting married at that moment, but then we remembered ABC still had rights to their wedding”. How long does ABC have rights to a wedding of someone on The Bachelor? 2 years.

4) I know that the contestants have to take an STD test before they go on The Bachelor or The Bachelorette, but must they also take one before they appear on Paradise? I mean filming stops for The Bachelor in November and Paradise doesn’t start filming till early summer, so that can gives months between filming. That being said, most of the people on the show have probably hooked up with others after they were done filming. I’m sorry, but I’m for one am always terrified of getting an STD that I will stop a guy if I don’t know him well enough to trust him that he doesn’t have an STD. Whenever I think of Paradise, all I can think of how many STD’s are possibly being spread. I think I could watch the show more comfortably if I knew each one was tested for an STD before going on it.

Comment: Yes. They have to go through medical again.

Corrine’s family need their own reality show. The dad is hilarious and the family is shallow and fun. Those kind of people make for good trashy reality shows. And please, it’s time to have a new famous family. I’m tired of the Kardashians.

Comment: As much I wouldn’t watch something like that, would any of us be surprised if she did get one? It’s not unheard of in the reality TV world. Lets hope she doesn’t.

Hey Steve! Love the site and Podcast!

First, what’s up with Nicks Yellow…perhaps…Livestrong bracelet? Really…Lance? He wears a yellow bracelet? Sorry. I’ve never paid much attention to Nick’s wrists on dates, so I have no idea what it is.

Second, just like in Unreal is there a show psychologist on staff for the Bachelor franchise?

Comment: Yep. And each contestant speaks with her immediately when they’re eliminated.

Hi Steve,

Long time reader, but rarely email or comment anything. I just wanted to say that I’m really enjoying the podcasts. Also, I read last week someone commented about Lesley Murphy from Sean Lowe’s season and I have to say, she was absolutely one of my favorite girls not only on his season, but for the last few years. Yes she has a travel blog and it’s pretty successful, but her and her boyfriend of about 4 years broke up, so as far as I can tell on social media, she’s single. I know it’ll never happen because she didn’t make it to hometowns on Sean’s season, plus that was like 4.5 years ago, but I so wish she would come back/be the Bachelorette one day. Do you have anymore insight on her time on the show/her in general? I’m still shocked she didn’t make it further because she seems so funny and genuine. Sorry for the long email. Keep up the good work.

Comment: Thanks for that info. Didn’t realize her and boyfriend broke up. I don’t see Lesley having any chance of ever being the “Bachelorette,” but single definitely means she can at least appear on BIP.

Funny Lesley Murphy story: I alluded to this in one of my podcasts that I attended a Michelle Money charity event 4 or 5 years ago. I attended back to back years. The second year I went the event was end of March/beginning of April right after Sean’s season had just aired and Desiree’s was then currently in filming. So a lot of Sean’s girls were at this event and Lesley was one of them. I met a few of them briefly, and I specifically remember Lesley asking me if I knew where Desiree was headed during her season. At the time, I didn’t know because I don’t believe filming had left LA yet. But now I know why Lesley was so curious, because if you remember, a few of Desiree’s girls from Sean’s season showed up in the episode before hometowns to talk to the guys and Lesley was one of them. Of course, she left that part out when she asked me.



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