Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails,” Virginia Loves the “Bachelorette,” & a “Grease 2” Death

Photo Credit: ABC

Hi Steve –

Long time reader, never contacted you with any questions but have been wondering about something for a while now.

When the lead has a rose ceremony and eliminates contestants, after that, when they ‘cheers’ to the next location, do they continue to spend time together and hang out that evening or do they just cheers for the cameras and cut the scene at that point?

Thank you for the spoilers each season.

Comment: Pretty much done after they cheers. There’s not much time done mingling after that.

You have 11 years to prepare for Wednesday July 4, 2029. Enjoy!

Comment: Two things: 1) If I’m still covering this show in 11 years, shoot me. 2) Thank God we don’t have to re-live that horrible holiday nightmare of it being on a Wednesday again for another decade plus. Awful.

Hey Steve,

Just a few random questions about the production of the Bachelor/Bachelorette:

I’ve heard reference on other podcasts to contestants spending time with “their” producer. Does each contestant have their own producer for the duration of the show? Is it 1:1 or are there fewer producers each with a handful of contestants? And what exactly does that mean- what is the role of the contestants’ individual producer during the show? Are they just the ones interviewing them in the ITMs or is it beyond that? A lot of questions here, but essentially when the show starts, there are a few producers who could interview you in your ITM’s. You’ll usually get one in particular more than others. But as the numbers dwindle down, it’s basically someone that has covered you the most and spent the most time with you because that’s who you feel most comfortable with. You spend so much time with them, you feel like they’re your friend and you can tell them anything. Of course as we know, that’s their job. And they will do anything they can for the show. Watch “UnReal.” Not that far off.

I saw in last week’s emails you answered a question I had about air travel and whether the lead travels with the contestants. Have you ever gotten spoilers due to the travel portion? I feel like I’ve never seen pictures “outing” contestants and production during travel, but I suppose they can fly under the radar more so than the lead, though I don’t remember ever seeing spoilers or photos of the lead either though – have you ever gotten photos or info about leads and traveling? Do they leads fly commercial? On Kaitlyn’s season, that was the last one I remember specifically, when the guys left LA and headed to NY for episode 4, someone recognized them in the airport and sent me those pictures. Had quite a few of those and posted them. Other than that, it’s pretty rare. Because you have to remember, when it’s filming, the only people who know who these contestants are are the die hards who follow my site, which is such a small percentage of their total audience. And not only that, but they’ve only seen a few pictures that I have posted. Then you couple it with those same people randomly running into them at an airport? It’s why it doesn’t happen very often. Basically it’s luck.

I also remember there were airport pictures in Mexico for Ben’s season as they were headed to the Bahamas that I posted. And on Brad’s second season, there were pics I posted of some of the girls at an airport somewhere, but I’m already forgetting which airport.

How would production have been able to contact three of Jason’s friends without him having some sort of inkling that they might be contacted or appear at some point? Do all contestants need to provide the names of family and several friends before filming starts?


Comment: Yes. Production knows a lot about your friends and family before filming even begins. They’ll even call them beforehand for “references” basically so it wouldn’t have been too hard.

Hi Steve,

I absolutely love your spoilers. I have a few questions.

I don’t know if this has happened before but I’ve noticed some of the guys (Garrett, jason, blake, etc) are @ing Becca and producers in their ig posts. I was under the impression that it was a no-no. Is this allowed? Social media is way more lenient than it used to be. Other than the final two purposely posting a picture of them together in the same location with both their faces in it saying, “We’re engaged!” it doesn’t seem like much is off limits nowadays.

Are there any contestants that you think, just as a viewer, might be a good fit for each other? I’m sure there are but I really don’t give it much attention. I have zero interest in playing matchmaker.

Who do you think is the most genuine guy on Becca’s season? I really don’t know.

Do you know what episode/where Arie will make an appearance in the season?


Comment: An upcoming one? Ha ha. I figured it’d be next week since I don’t know why they’d fly Arie to Thailand or the Maldives to have some sort of closure conversation with her. I really don’t know when it happens. The episode description for next week doesn’t even hint at Arie showing up, so it’s looking less and less like it’s next week. Unless it’s at the VERY end and they do a to be continued…

Hey Steve,

Just curious if you got any word one the MTA taping. Have you heard anything about Lincoln, and if he will be in attendance? I know Connor already ran to tmz and basically threatened him to not come, but I didn’t know if you’ve heard that he still might try to make an appearance. If he does, how do you think it’ll go over for him when confronted about his conviction. And if he doesn’t, do you think they’ll still acknowledge the situation?

Comment: Well it’s not like Lincoln can control whether or not he’s at the MTA. ABC will either allow him or they won’t. My guess is they won’t, but I haven’t heard anything definitive as of yet.

Steve, your write ups have been especially funny lately! Thanks for making me laugh! The other day I thought to myself,
“My two favorite guys on the internet are Reality Steve and James Van Deer Beek.” (I hope you don’t find this offensive! Dawson now has five blond kids and his instagram is very funny but you’d probably hate it!) Wow. That’s quite a compliment. Thank you. I think.

IF you ever go to Melting Pot again, I strongly suggest that you skip the meat and just do cheese, a Caesar salad (my husband would say a house salad), a Love Martini (okay, you may hate it but it’s seriously the best – you can’t even taste the alcohol!), and the chocolate (white chocolate and peanut butter – trust me). You know what? The cheese part was the one I liked the least. And I like cheese. I just thought it was way too strong and dunking a bunch of stuff in it didn’t appeal to me. If there ever is a next time, I’d do the salad, meat, and dessert.

Also, thanks for letting me know that I wasn’t the only person completely thrown off by having 4th of July on a Wednesday. The worst ever, like you said. All day on Tuesday I thought it was Friday. I even thought at one point, “Yay! Dateline is on tonight.” Ugh. Then I thought today was Saturday. Even my seven year old came down the stairs today and said, “Do I have camp today?” (It’s on Monday.) The worst. Good thing thanks to the second email this week, it’s another 11 years before that travesty happens again.

My theory about Ashley and Jared is this…I am completely shocked that they are together and engaged. I never, ever saw it happening. But if he ever really had feelings for her (it seemed like he really didn’t), I’m convinced that Jared is such a nice guy that he was too afraid to be her first. Maybe they would’ve dated a while ago if she hadn’t been a virgin, but he was probably afraid that she would get even more attached to him, then he’d be the jerk who had to break up with her when she’d waited until she was 26 to have sex. Maybe even she realized his, and figured she had to just get it out of the way with someone – and Kevin was willing to be the guy. I was shocked she wasn’t crying on snapchat (not that I follow her, or snapchat) after that break up but she was probably just waiting for Jared to come around anyway. I know you don’t really care about them, and I can’t blame you. Kevin can NOT be the next bachelor. No, no, no. Colton does not seem ready to get married at all. I don’t think either of them will be.

I hope Becca never watches Garret’s first wedding video because it was beyond painful to watch. I think Becca looks like she’d be Kate Middleton’s sister. Am I crazy?

Looking forward to your next column!

Comment: Pippa? Or is it Pippi? I always forget. Becca looks like Cobie Smulders and that’s final ha ha.

I would love to be on bachelor in paradise

Comment: No joke. That was an email that was sent this week and that’s all that was in the email. How do you even respond to something like that?

Hi Steve,

If so, do you know if ABC has offered to broadcast any of the upcoming weddings for Rachel, Jo Jo or Kaitlyn? No, I don’t know.

I still find it odd the wedding of Des and Chris was not shown, especially since there are so few success stories for either the men or the women. It certainly is a mystery. Especially considering they televised one after them, and it was two BIP couples nonetheless. Jade and Tanner’s got the royal treatment. Evan and Carly’s looked like a backyard BBQ. I mean, lets be real. Look at every Bachelor/ette wedding they’ve ever televised then look at Evan and Carly’s. They certainly got the short end of the stick.

Also just a comment on Becca’s season. Personally I’ve found this to be one of the worst ones, even though I like Becca a lot. The problem is many of the guys have been terrible. She did make the right final four choices as they were about the only ones who should have been there in the first place, along with maybe a couple more. I think the show would benefit from eliminating more people earlier as I’m sure Becca never for a second was seriously considering ones like Lincoln, Chris, etc. Also, the group dates have been cringe worthy. Wayne Newton and then that ridiculous “debate” at the Richmond capital. Really?

Thanks for all you do.

Comment: I feel like we get this every season, and unfortunately, I don’t see much changing. What’d we have dominate the first five or so episodes of JoJo’s season? Chad. What’d we have dominate the first 4 or or 5 episodes of Rachel’s season? Lee. I just don’t ever see it changing. They’d much rather show drama in the house than the lead developing feelings for her front runners early on. And it’s for one reason and one reason only: This. Show. Is. Not. About. Love. If it was, it would’ve been cancelled long ago.


You have always said that you don’t have a lot of respect for contestants that make this show their entire life, but Nick Viall has taken it to a whole new level. We saw Nick slut shame Andi publicly on her after show, we saw his temper tantrum when Kaitlyn sent him home on the finale, we saw him screw Jen over on Paradise so he could be the next bachelor, and on his own after show he sat up there like cardboard acting like he did not love Vanessa at all, or even like her. His after show was even worse than Arie’s because the people on the stage on Arie’s show at least had genuine emotion. After four failed attempts on the show he said he was done with the bachelor. He had two or three acting jobs, and now everything he does is bachelor related. Nick reenacts the show, he recaps the show, he’s a commentator about the show, and he’s on every podcast contributing all his wisdom about the show. If you desired wisdom, you would want to listen to what Sean Lowe has to say, because Sean was a success on the show. Nick has four failed attempts on the show and has no wisdom to offer that a person could respect. You have always given insight and entertainment about the show, where Nick does not. He even went on a podcast and said that you threatened his dad. As a viewer, you feel very cheated when someone is the bachelor to promote a grooming website, rather than be sincere about finding love on the show. Maybe Nick thinks that the viewing audience are a bunch of gullible dummies. My question is, what is your opinion of Nick doing all this, at this point?

Comment: I can’t disagree with anything you said. It’s basically the points I’ve been making for years now with him.

As for his dad, I addressed this when it was first brought to my attention when he said this on Juliet’s podcast. He couldn’t be more wrong. Either he really truly doesn’t know what happened and never read the emails, or he’s lying. I still have the emails. Every single one from his dad. There was no threatening whatsoever. His dad came to me for help while Nick was filming Andi’s season, I did as much as I could, I told him to watch out for producers and how they can make something look however they want (i.e. Becca’s leaving of the table Monday night after Colton’s virgin statement), and look what happened? Was there a guy who got a worse edit than Nick on Andi’s season? No. And what has Nick said about that since? That not everything was as it seemed and there were things shown that were out of context. But then on the other hand, he tells contestants now not to blame their edit. So yeah, he’s kinda all over the map. But I took offense to the stuff he said about me regarding his dad because it was a blatant lie. I guarantee Nick never saw the communication his dad and I had.

Dear Steve,

Thank you as always for giving the fans the inside scoop on the bachelor franchise shows. I have a few questions.

1. I saw that ABC is having a casting call for the bachelor in NYC on Thursday and it made me wonder with the considerable amount of contestants that have been casted because they knew past contestants like Tia, Whitney B, etc. I would imagine that it is pretty uncommon for most of the contestants being from casting calls? Would I be right in that assumption? Yes.

2. How many hours could a potential contestant spend at a casting call for the bachelor? It all depends where you are in line. I would think 2-3 hours would be the max but it’s hard to say without knowing the size of the crowd.

3. Have you heard anything about any safe house visits for Becca and Garrett? They seem pretty non-existent recently since both of them are active on social media and seemingly in different states each weekend. Yes.

4. Do you know if Rachel and Bryan are getting married soon on ABC? I surmised that they would be getting married soon when I saw an article published saying that Rachel was seen with Randi Rahm in NYC discussing wedding dress ideas. Haven’t heard anything.

5. Have you heard anything bad about Jason Tartick? Yeah, a little.

6. Have you heard anything bad about Blake Horstmann? Yeah, a little.

Thank you!

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  1. sc07

    July 11, 2018 at 9:20 AM

    Am I the only person who sees how condescending RS is? For example the last email, why feel the need to be an asshole, I don’t find being a condescending asshole funny at all. If that’s how he feels, just don’t include the email. Yeah, I get it, it’s aggravating to be asked the same question over and over but just don’t include those emails. Just like he’d like to not get asked that question every week, I’d like to see one week that he’s not rude to his “fans”. I also don’t understand why most emailers feel the need to give him praise at the beginning of their emails, basically for just doing his job, especially since his spoilers haven’t been too good. Just look at the BIP spoilers this season. In seasons past he’d give most of them out while filming was going on but this year filming has ended and he’s not gave anything that with just a little digging we could’ve found ourselves. Someone else made a comment about the lack of spoilers this season and got a reply saying that he gave the full cast list, yes he did but it wasn’t until it was released to another site. He can say we’re spoiled but it’s what readers expect to find when they come to a spoiler site and it’s how he use to do things. He can say he’s waiting until he has everything before he releases them, but I think he’s lost his sources and having trouble getting them. We come to this site for spoilers and maybe some inside information but when we ask for information that he doesn’t have or doesn’t want to answer, he’s rude and condescending to his readers. And for the record, I, myself have never sent a readers email but just don’t like the way he treats some of the emailers. Just my opinion.

  2. tinyred500

    July 11, 2018 at 10:18 AM

    No, you’re not the only or first person to think RS is rude and condescending. Just look back over the last few years comments and you’ll see people stating what you have and more. He very often doesn’t even bother to answer a question or half answers it. In this post he couldn’t be bothered to Google The Duchess of Cambridge’s Sister’s name to confirm it for a reply (which is Pippa). I roll my eyes at a lot of his replies now, he’s very biased too. However, it’s his site and up to him how he wants to present himself.

    I’m opting to go spoil free for The Bachelor, which is pretty easy for me as I’m in Britain! 🙂

  3. rob22

    July 11, 2018 at 10:46 AM

    I don’t understand why ANYONE sends RS emails. I sent him one that I thought was pretty decent, and it generated like a one word answer. He puts zero thought into his answers, and gives half answers most of the time. This is why I don’t read the emails columns very often. They’re very long and the content is mostly the emailers asking long winded questions, followed by brief non answers and occasionally rude answers. I do like his site, but the email posts are terrible.

    I honestly wish he’d bring back the Dr. Reality Steve posts so that I can answer the questions. 🙂 That post seems to have gone bye-bye. He’s not even been soliciting them anymore.

  4. tinyred500

    July 11, 2018 at 11:40 AM

    @rob, RS was asking for Dr Reality Steve emails not that long ago…umm it all sort of went pear shaped after the Garrett social media thing. I hadn’t actually noticed they weren’t there, till you mentioned it.

  5. jlal

    July 11, 2018 at 11:52 AM

    Rob22, RS probably stopped the Dr. Reality Steve posts because your answers/advice was way better than his!

    I have always thought he was condescending, even though at his intelligence level and with his subpar grammatical skills, it is an unearned privilege.

    I like Jason a little more now. Don’t know why, but I just noticed him recently and he is kind of cute and seems really nice.

    Wills seems medicated.

    Bad mouthing an ex was a huge red flag for me when I was dating. If they are going to bad mouth a person they vowed their life to and sometimes the mother of their children, then what would they say about me someday. I’ve never respected people who bad mouth their ex. It says way more about them than the ex. Also, it doesn’t indicate they think very highly of me, if they think I would appreciate them bad mouthing their ex. I’m not that insecure, shallow, or needy. RED FLAG Becca!

  6. upmyalley

    July 11, 2018 at 1:10 PM

    Me thinks Stevo getting any spoilers may be heading south and he may soon be out of a job. Some of you have mentioned his bad attitude, lack of spoilers, and seemingly disinterest in his own site as of late. I hope he has a back up plan. Maybe his partner Smashly Spivey will throw him a bone to keep him alive a little while longer. In the meantime, I will still visit for a few tidbits here and there. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you Stevo.

  7. shenanigans

    July 11, 2018 at 2:26 PM

    As someone who writes for a living, I think that Steve takes risks with his column that he shouldn’t take because he doesn’t have the writing chops to pull them off. For example, it takes a fair amount of skill to give a snarky reply that doesn’t sound rude and condescending. Steve rarely hits the right note on that. As a result, his “clever” replies usually come off as rude.

    Second, he shouldn’t print questions that he doesn’t plan to answer. After awhile, it makes people wonder if he actually has the information that he claims to have.

    Third, Steve seems obsessed with being the “cool kid” who puts down other people who are less clever and witty. But, that only works when you actually know the people you are talking to and you really ARE too cool for school. Steve, to me, hasn’t “earned” the right to act that way. Most of the time, when Steve goes off on someone, the person (in my opinion) doesn’t deserve it. They just made the mistake of asking a question he didn’t feel like answering that day.

    No problem, set that question aside. Answer it another day. But, for god’s sake, don’t include it, only to try to impress us by being rude. LOL

  8. nickielson1

    July 12, 2018 at 12:50 PM

    Can’t disagree about Steve’s rudeness and condescension at times, but that’s why we love him – not because he’s rude and condescending but because he’s unpolished and REAL. It’s refreshing on an interweb full of preening, posing, and posturing. He doesn’t suck up or sell out to anyone, not even his fans – he’s just himself, a very brave and rare thing these days for someone so visible in the public eye.

  9. jenscho

    July 12, 2018 at 1:55 PM

    Yes,he is very sarcastic. He thinks it’s funny to act annoyed towards his fans. He mentioned once he doesn’t read comments to his posts. We should email him about this and see if he includes it in his reader emails.

  10. jenscho

    July 12, 2018 at 1:59 PM

    We should email him about this and see if he replies to us in reader emails. *he mentioned before he doesn’t read comments on his posts.

  11. jenscho

    July 12, 2018 at 2:02 PM

    One can still be real AND not be rude.

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